Body image issues

I feel like I'm too skinny. My arms and legs are like sticks and I have no butt. I've always been this way and I've always been self conscious about it. Especially in high school when random people who I didn't even know would come up to me and grab my wrists and say there so small! And I kind of feel like I'm not allowed to have body issues because I'm not fat.

Yes! I still hurt from feeling that I lost out on life by being a bit overweight for 15 years. In reality I've been fit for nearly 10 years now! But a tough postpartum period set my self esteem way back. I didn't have my decent shape to draw self esteem from anymore.

So I am trying to figure out how to have the body, but like my self no matter what.

There are some useful thoughts in this thread. Is anyone using any specific tools to help themselves along? Please don't say therapy, haha. I like self-help.

I definitely can! I grew up doing ballet and did it to quite a high level. Even when I was little (9 or 10) I noticed what other people looked like, I saw how the tiny girls got so much attention and their lines always looked so good. Of course it's ridiculous because at that age we were growing at different rates, I developed faster than those girls and had always done a lot of sport, particularly swimming, which gave me stronger but larger thighs and shoulders so I always felt huge- not like a dainty ballerina.

Nowadays I don't dance but that kind of dainty ideal stuck with me. I try not to compare as much anymore, it's hard not to notice though, because it's pointless and a lot of the time bone structure has more to do with it than actual weight. No amount of weight loss will give me tiny hips or long legs. I'd love to say I don't envy girls with long slim legs but I do! I'm also concious of how big my thighs are and the fact I can seemingly NEVER flatten that muffin top.

I try to focus on the bits of my body I like and try find a positive spin on the bits I feel less positive about.

I do, I really don't feel like I am "thin", but in retrospect, I never felt like I was "overweight" either. I struggle to see any changes good or bad. I always feel the same. So I was shocked when I stepped on the scale this past new years and saw what I weighed (nearly 155lbs @ 5'3" wearing a size 10/12). Fastforward 7 months. I am now at my goal weight of 125lbs and just purchased size 4 pants. I should feel "thin" but I don't. I know I look thinner, because people have commented on my weight loss, but I just don't see the drastic difference.

Sometimes I'm like, "holy bananas, I hate my body" but then I'm like, "life is an illusion. i am a speck of cosmic dust floating on a rock trapped in an orbit around a ball of flame in a vast and largely unknown universe that is unfathomably older than humans so why am I worried about this?!"

For real though - some days are hard, some days are easy. Some days I think, hot damn, I'm smokin' whereas I could look the exact same on another day and want to crawl back in bed because nothing looks or feels good.

Also, as weird as this sounds, I enjoyed reading this thread. When MFP interviewed me a few months ago and wrote this blog post, I felt real alone on the subject 'cause it's the part of weight loss people rarely talk about.

Oh totally. I need to stop nitpicking myself. Sometimes being on MFP or looking for health advice is triggering which is a bummer. I'm feeling better than I have in a long time, I'm healthier AND more active than I have been in a long time; shouldn't that be enough?

I appreciate where you're coming from. Unfortunately we are Our Own Worst Enemy and we're the last ones to realize the change.

I'll give you my perspective. 57 year old male 208 pounds. I lost 80 lb and then maintaining that close to a year. When I look in the mirror I still see the flabby arms and I still have a belly. I remember walking into a bathroom one time and caught my reflection in the mirror and I said what the hell is wrong with that mirror and then I realized that's the new me.

Due to the external advertising, we have a warped view of what true beauty looks like. Unfortunately it's an unattainable goal that's meant to feed our emotions so we buy something.

If anybody has time to see what I'm talking about do a Google search. One of the things I recommend is Jamie Lee Curtis did a photoshoot without makeup to show what she actually looks like.

The other one is even crazier there's a YouTube video that shows how photoshopping works. It starts off with a super hot blonde in a bikini and they go back to the original subject. It was a slice of pizza. They were able to photoshop a slice of pizza and turn it into a hot blonde.