Why did you have a baby????!!!!!!

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kparks770
kparks770 Posts: 113 Member
in Chit-Chat
I been debating this idea,being Im 34 now.I have no children and havent tried.I wonder if its even a good thing to bring one into this world with all the problems and fighting and all the worries I would have and the kid/kids.I have been watching 2 babies the last 4 days and its been rough Im thinking I want ONE if that lol I just was curious why people have them? I know it sounds stupid but Im serious. What do you think???:smile:
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  • emmaNEEDSskinny
    emmaNEEDSskinny Posts: 317
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    to carry on there family name :)?
  • beedo30
    beedo30 Posts: 186
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    One word describes my first....oops!
  • mamacremers
    mamacremers Posts: 183 Member
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    My first was a surprise and second was planned. I've always wanted kids, ever since I was a teen. My friend had a baby when she was 16. Not the ideal life for her, but it was her life. I just love playing with babies, I'm definitely a baby person. My husband loves it when they're older and more able to play with them. But when they're babies, everything is new and every baby is different. It's a new adventure with every child. For example, my son is a thumb sucker, my daughter was a pacifier baby. My daughter was very much a perfectionist and very careful with what she did and he doesn't care at all. Now that my girl is 5, she'll be starting Kindergarten in a couple weeks and we're starting a whole new adventure. She just changed to a booster seat and that was a whole different world for me too. I had no idea how to install it and worried myself about installing it right. Parenting has its good times and its bad times, but I LOVE IT! During the bad times, I just take a deep breaths and say to myself "oh, the joys of parenting..."
  • bjclaywell
    bjclaywell Posts: 165 Member
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    I was 33 when I had my daughter. I was also in a position (lucky me) to decide if and when I wanted to have children. My husband (at the time) and I just wanted kids - a ton of them. We were going to have one naturally, then adopt. We had one naturally after years of trying, and then just stopped.

    But I had a hard time with other people's children, and went through a time period where I thought I wouldn't be a good mom because kids drive me nuts. Well, they still do. Except mine. :) For me, it was worth every moment. I wanted to experience the joy of pregnancy, which I ADORED, and I wanted to experience the wonder of holding a little bitty creation in my arms from the moment of her birth. I was bowled over by the love I felt, and to this day, I wouldn't trade anything in the entire world for my daughter and the experiences we've had together.

    I would like more kids. But they won't happen naturally, so I've considered adoption. Problem is, I'm now a single mom, my daughter is 8, and I've probably gotten to a point where it's not going to happen.

    BUT - if one of your issues is that you don't want to bring a child into this world (something I've thought about over and over again, both before, but alot since, having my daughter), why not look into loving and caring for a child someone else brought into the world but doesn't want. There are, unfortunately, tons of kiddos out there who want nothing more than the love of a parent(s).

    Anyway - having my daughter changed my life, for the better, I think. But it IS an individual choice...and there is a lot of headache that comes with it. But the joy outweighs it...SOOOOO much!
  • ajbeans
    ajbeans Posts: 2,857 Member
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    There are no good reasons when it comes to children. You either want them or you don't. It's crazy when you think about trying to explain why you wanted kids, and it's crazy when you explain why you don't. :) Procreation is not a logical thing. It's just something you feel. I had kids because I've always wanted to be a mom. Not everyone feels that way.
  • springtrio
    springtrio Posts: 429 Member
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    Well, there has always been "bad" things. Not making fun of you, but look at the holocaust. People still had families back then (obviously), the wars, crime, etc. Yes, it's sick but crime has always been around so that has never stopped me from wanting a family.

    And why? I've always felt the need to reproduce. Always had the motherly instinct. I grew up in and out of foster care and when I met my husband we knew we'd have a big family. I never had a "family" so it was never a question NOT to have children. We wanted 4, but after our third we both had permanent birth control done because financially it was all we can afford.
  • XFitMojoMom
    XFitMojoMom Posts: 3,255 Member
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    because I'm masochistic and like to torture myself... recovering from one c-section wasn't enough, I went and did it again 18 months later. And wow, the mental abuse is titillating if I say so myself..
  • MB_Positif
    MB_Positif Posts: 8,897 Member
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    Honestly it is scary thinking of bringing a child into this world the way things are now, but I had my son almost 5 1/2 years ago (just before the crazy dive in the economy) and if you really want to find out what it feels like to give and receive unconditional love...have a child. I learn amazing things from him daily and he's been a HUGE motivation in this fitness process for me too!
  • SarahofTwins
    SarahofTwins Posts: 1,169 Member
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    I remember never wanting to have kids until I met my husband. The first time we tried I had a miscarriage and it was a very sad time before. After trying for another year we had our son, its one of the most fulfilling experiences to have your own child and now I understand why most parents would do anything for their children. We then decided to have another but were blessed to have twin girls...now that was a big change to say the least lol. It's a joy to experience those little steps they take from their smiles, crawling, walking, and being a family. Don't just do because society or your family wants you to but for you and your significant other. It takes a lot of work but its very rewarding :flowerforyou:
  • jamesysmom
    jamesysmom Posts: 38
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    Well I had my three because I wanted to be a mom and I love being pregnant. I cant imagine life without them. The are my strength when I dont think I can do something. My daughter is soooo much like me its not even funny. She is such a beautiful young woman and I am honored to be her mom. My boys are so caring and sweet as well and when they found out I was trying to lose weight they were like ok mamma we will help. every evening they say ok mamma lets go walk they look forward to and now so do I. They are growing up so fast my liz is a senior, alex is in 8th grade and james is in 4 th grade . Im so proud to be their mamma. But having kids needs to be something you and your partner decide to do together. If the decision is to have kids get ready for a lot of sleepless nights and a lot of crying because its not always fun, its not always glamoruous but it is one of the most wonderful experiences I have ever had the pleasure of having and would do it all agian in a heartbeat. But as others have said its a personal decision and it needs to be made for the right reasons ; Good luck with your decision what ever it is .
  • kparks770
    kparks770 Posts: 113 Member
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    wow adoption sounds good and I never thought of it that way.IM glad you end up liking ur own kids more cause my other half is kinda like yeah but acts like she doesnt like them lol IDK I always worry what if something happens and we part ways then I will do it alone and I just couldnt.
  • BlessedHeart
    BlessedHeart Posts: 249 Member
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    There is no greater love, than the love between a Mother and child. I love my two beyond words. I was blessed with a daughter, then my son was born 4 1/2 yrs later. My daughter is now 29 yrs old and she has two children of her own. It may sound sappy, but I have always told my two that I loved them even before I could hold them in my arms. When my daughter was born, I thought something was wrong with her because she never cried. She let out little noises as they cleaned her up, weighed her, dressed and blanketed her. I asked if she was OK...the nurse laughed and said she was perfect. Then she put her in my arms...and as I spoke to her Daddy about how beautiful she was...she tilted her head back to look at me and blinked her eyes several times and our eyes met...for the first time. I have never felt so much love for, and such a connection to someone. She and I are still so very close. I wouldn't trade being a Mom for anything. :heart:
  • kparks770
    kparks770 Posts: 113 Member
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    That sounds exactly like me I was the one who has always loved kids/babies.I have babysat since age 8.I was mature for my age.I am the one hijacking the babies at all the family reunions lol.Every chance I get I babysit lol Ive done it this week 4 days in a row for 2 babies and they have wore my butt out.Its like having twins cause their only 4 mnths apart a boy and a girl.It was hard driving anywhere trying to fit them in my mustang-Im assuming I may have to ger rid of it if I do have kids.Not much room lol I love all ages too-I just get scared of homework and someone hurting them in any way shape or form.Id kill someone.
  • kparks770
    kparks770 Posts: 113 Member
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    Thats a great point.It seems that this baby thing may be on the table for discussion. I really do love kids/babies and people in general.I cry when the kids/babies I watch have to leave lol then again im 34.
  • Mommyof3loves
    Mommyof3loves Posts: 276
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    My oldest daughter was a surprise. But one I will never forget, and I didn't stay with her father....woke up to the fact that he was never going to try to amount to anything while I was pregnant so I was a single mom that early on and yes it's hard but it was worth it. And my second one was planned and just a little peanut. Wouldn't change having either one of them.

    And yes homework, school discipline is hard with them but you have to do what's best for them...I'm still a softie though :-)

    From the sounds of it you really want a child of your own and you would make a great mom.
  • sbwood888
    sbwood888 Posts: 953 Member
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    I have 2 daughters. Kids are awesome...until they become teenagers. ugh. :grumble: :huh: You still love them of course, but they break your heart. :brokenheart: I hope I survive my oldest daughter's teen years. She is quite a handful to deal with.
  • BecksgotBack
    BecksgotBack Posts: 385 Member
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    because I'm masochistic and like to torture myself... recovering from one c-section wasn't enough, I went and did it again 18 months later. And wow, the mental abuse is titillating if I say so myself..

    LOL

    i needed somebody to do my dishes, laundry, clean the house.....isn't that why we have children? to become our little slaves? pretty sure that's why I was born...
  • koosdel
    koosdel Posts: 3,317 Member
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    Father told me it was because he didn't like mowing.

    I think it was really because he liked replacing broken things and yelling.
  • Chiquita_Banana
    Chiquita_Banana Posts: 500
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    Father told me it was because he didn't like mowing.

    I think it was really because he liked replacing broken things and yelling.


    hehe ur the best koos... great job on mowing by the way!

    in all seriousness i had kids because i always wanted to have them and be a mother. now i can't picture my life without them they brighten my days and make me smile all the time.. yes they're not always perfect angels and definately can give you headaches lol, but it comes with raising children, i'm currently pregnant with my third and i also love being pregnant... skip passed my morning/noon/night sickness and sciatic pains, its great =D but a decision only you can make, i dont think everyone is fit to be a parent its a big decision good luck =)
  • Mmmary212
    Mmmary212 Posts: 410 Member
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    Because I'm irresponsible. True story. I was 18, it happens.

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