My bf and chics in bikinis.

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Replies

  • tanyamelliott
    tanyamelliott Posts: 19
    Think this is a common frustration among women who have low body confidence. I have felt this wy for years an I've been with my boyfriend for over 4 years and he never looks at the girls...I do!! Because I obese over the tall skinny tan model like women that have a completely different body frame than I do at 5'2". I will say oh my gosh babe what if I looked like that!?;) in a somewhat jealous/joking way and he always says Id love you no matter what!<3 even if you got big:) haha an I've always complained to him about how I feel fat and hate my body but the one thing he ( and most people I've talked to) thinks the sexiest tthing is confidence. If you feel uncomfortable around the skinny girls remember they too have insecurities and focus on what you love about yourself. And as everyone else had said...he is with you, not them. But if you can communicate that it bothers you without seeming like you are jealous it is a goof idea to talk about it. If he doeant respect you enough in front of you...then what the heck!!! You're beautiful and you deserve his undivided attention!
  • otr12
    otr12 Posts: 632 Member
    I stare at girls butts at the track.
    While you are with your gf?
    I am a heterosexual married woman. I'm just pointing out that they're hard to not stare at. Doesn't mean I want to touch it. I have no interest in knowing the person attached to said butt. They come in so many different shapes, sizes and varieties and move in such fascinating ways. They're just interesting to look at.
  • young1726
    young1726 Posts: 347 Member
    First of all, I think people telling you that your bf is awful and you should dump him is totally uncalled for. We can't judge him and your relationship off of this one short blurb. I think that is disrespectful. You said he treats you well and you know he loves you.

    Second, there is no way any one of us will keep a guy from looking at other girls. Heck, even girls as gorgeous as Jessica Simpson and Shania Twain have issues with this. It's natural to check out someone we think is attractive. Notice I said "we". Girls do it too. I check out guys that have nice, ripped bodies. But does that mean I want them? No. I am married to the man I want. He doesn't have the perfect cut out body, but I love him for who he is. Just like I don't have the perfect cut out body, but I know he loves me for who I am. I know he checks out the hot girls...but hey even I glance their direction. Don't you? If he hasn't given you a reason to have trust issues then don't have trust issues. That in itself will cause problems.

    Third, staring, oogling and going on about how hot the girls are is different than a quick glance check out and I can see how that can make you feel uncomfortable. Confront him and let him know that you that you understand that he's going to check out the hot girls but making a show of it doesn't make you feel good. Tell him you know he cares for you and that's not the issue, but maybe he can be a little more subtle with his check outs and maybe he can tell his friends to tone it down a little since he has the one he wants.

    Hope all works out and that you don't make any rash decisions based on people jumping to conclusions on MFP!
  • hstallings13
    hstallings13 Posts: 306
    First of all, I think people telling you that your bf is awful and you should dump him is totally uncalled for. We can't judge him and your relationship off of this one short blurb. I think that is disrespectful. You said he treats you well and you know he loves you.

    Second, there is no way any one of us will keep a guy from looking at other girls. Heck, even girls as gorgeous as Jessica Simpson and Shania Twain have issues with this. It's natural to check out someone we think is attractive. Notice I said "we". Girls do it too. I check out guys that have nice, ripped bodies. But does that mean I want them? No. I am married to the man I want. He doesn't have the perfect cut out body, but I love him for who he is. Just like I don't have the perfect cut out body, but I know he loves me for who I am. I know he checks out the hot girls...but hey even I glance their direction. Don't you? If he hasn't given you a reason to have trust issues then don't have trust issues. That in itself will cause problems.

    Third, staring, oogling and going on about how hot the girls are is different than a quick glance check out and I can see how that can make you feel uncomfortable. Confront him and let him know that you that you understand that he's going to check out the hot girls but making a show of it doesn't make you feel good. Tell him you know he cares for you and that's not the issue, but maybe he can be a little more subtle with his check outs and maybe he can tell his friends to tone it down a little since he has the one he wants.

    Hope all works out and that you don't make any rash decisions based on people jumping to conclusions on MFP!


    I agree totally
  • StevLL
    StevLL Posts: 921 Member
    Noticing someone who is attractive is natural, but oogling them and commenting are completely different. We are not hard wired to be disrespectful, that is something we have control over. Talk to him and tell him how it makes you feel. Men and women notice attractive folks from both genders, if he truly cares about you he'll probably tone the oogling and commenting down which is kind of childish and imature anyways once you're past puberty.
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