Missing my husband but reaching my goals

I started on MFP about 5 years ago, way before I hit my topped out weight. I had basically been a thin person my whole life. In my 30's & 40's I started yo-yoing so I finally started eating healthy and exercising and at 47 years old, was at my perfect weight of 127 lbs, so I thought it was time to quit smoking. That was 10 years ago. Then I went through menopause. Between the two, I started gaining weight and pretty much didn't stop (some short diets here and there), until I got on a fitness and healthy eating plan, that I've been on for about a year and a half now. I recently started logging onto MFP again and going to a weight loss clinic for the last few months. In that year and a half, I have been going to the gym, lost weight, gained weight and lost some more. I've watched my husband of 34 years, go through horrific throat cancer treatment, which ultimately did not work. He was on a feeding tube the whole time, about 2 1/2 years. I would go get fast food and eat it in the car on the way home because I felt guilty for eating in front of him. The cancer spread to his brain and I lost him in January. He never made me feel fat, even at 5'3", 234 lbs. I have lost almost 58 lbs now, and am more than halfway to my goal. I wish he were here, but I can still hear his voice in my head, telling me in his Bostonian accent, "you look gorgeous sweethawt!". I will make it to my goal and there are a few things I will always remember. 1. My weight loss clinic coach told me, "once you reach your goal weight, continue to weigh yourself. If you start to gain weight back, do not let yourself go more than 4 lbs before you get yourself back on track. If you don't, once you hit that 5th pound, it's easy to just let yourself start eating badly and continue to gain." 2. Betty White was asked how she has kept her figure into her 90's. She said she weighs herself every day and if she gains, then she eats better that day. And 3. My husband is always cheering my on, even if I can't see him.


  • Syneea
    Syneea Posts: 451 Member
    I'm sorry for your loss. Way to go with staying consistent and focused! :-)
  • dorisj717
    dorisj717 Posts: 381 Member
    I am so sorry for your loss, you sound like an amazing woman. Stay strong you can do it!!
  • marelthu
    marelthu Posts: 184 Member
    Your husband would be so proud of you. You're amazing!
  • nowine4me
    nowine4me Posts: 3,985 Member
    I'm proud of you and I don't even know you. Atta Girl!
  • artbyrachelh
    artbyrachelh Posts: 338 Member
    This is so touching and inspiring!
  • Kalasie
    Kalasie Posts: 4 Member
    So sorry to hear of your loss. Good for you for getting back up and carrying on!
  • JamieAmble
    JamieAmble Posts: 23 Member
    So sorry for your loss. Keep up the good work towards a healthier you!
  • ashlee_g
    ashlee_g Posts: 20 Member
    Thank you for sharing and count me in your fan club!
  • QS82
    QS82 Posts: 65 Member
    I'm so sorry for what you have been through with your husband. Huge well done for your achievements so far, you sound like a wonderful person.
  • Polo265
    Polo265 Posts: 287 Member
    I am so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine your difficulty! You've made lots of progress and yes, your husband is cheering you on. Hang in there.
  • SisepuedeLinda
    SisepuedeLinda Posts: 132 Member
    Thank you for sharing. I'm sorry for your loss but I know he would be so proud of his "sweethawt"
  • quiksylver296
    quiksylver296 Posts: 28,442 Member
    You are so strong!
  • AidaF430
    AidaF430 Posts: 173 Member
    He is definitely cheering you on! You are beautiful inside and out. Congratulations on your success! You should be very proud.
  • RenaPink11
    RenaPink11 Posts: 343 Member
    Cheering you on!
  • potokat
    potokat Posts: 23 Member
    This is an amazing story, and you are an amazing woman! Thank you for sharing this!
  • skinneeme007
    skinneeme007 Posts: 24 Member
    Blinking back tears! You are amazing!
  • Ruatine
    Ruatine Posts: 3,424 Member
    Okay, I just cried. I'm so sorry for your loss. Congratulations on your successes! You're an inspiration!
  • aliciaaw
    aliciaaw Posts: 180 Member
    So sorry to hear about the loss of your husband! Sounds like you're a strong woman hang in there, you'll reach your goal! You have your angle in your corner
  • Loser_53
    Loser_53 Posts: 34 Member
    So sorry for your loss.it must be so difficult. You are doing great and you are such a strong, inspirational woman.
  • noclady1995
    noclady1995 Posts: 452 Member
    So sorry for your loss. You sound like a strong lady.
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