Need some tips for avoiding the office treats
Replies
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I have a coworker who not only brings in treats all the time (and not the yummy homemade kind, but generic store brought crap), who tries to pressure me into eating them with the "youll hurt my feelings" crap, but ALSO critiques my lunch choices, saying im not eating enough, I should eat more carbs, etc etc.
I started with the respectful no thank you's, or I brought my own stuff, or I'm trying to watch what I eat. Didn't work.
the day she came into my office, where I had closed the door, offering me some Ms. Smith pie or something, and also saying I am not eating healthy food, was when my eye started twitching.
Yesterday, others ordered out, and I declined. I was told to "live a little." This was the snapping point. I told her she needs to live a little less by the looks of it. Hurt feelings or not, I don't care. I'd had enough.
Don't feel bad for declining something, and if they act like they are hurt, oh well. Do they pester you constantly, begging to you take part? If not, leave it be. But also don't expect people to stop bringing in the foods they enjoy. What if they asked you to stop bringing in (insert food here) because they don't like it? It'd be wrong, right. You're a person free to make your own choices about the food you eat. Respect them, and have them respect you. Good luck!
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TavistockToad wrote: »skymningen wrote: ». I have previously asked her decrease how often she was baking and she did for a few weeks.
Decide how often you want to have a treat or which of the stuff you would definitely not want to miss out on. She seemed to be understanding before, so just explain to her, that you think her stuff is delicious but that it is too much of a temptation for you as you are trying to limit your calorie intake. Ask her to only offer you something as often as you decided you would want it (like once a week, twice a month, whatever), and maybe preferably on your favorite stuff (so you would not miss out on that). She hopefully will be happy that there is some of her stuff so awesome even a weight conscious person does not want to pass on and that she can help. And she hopefully will remember to not tempt you too often.
its not up to the person baking to stop OP from eating it...
This^
I have a co-worker who has a candy dish in her office.....filled with chocolate kisses. It's her office she can do whatever she likes.12 -
hollyrayburn wrote: »
Yesterday, others ordered out, and I declined. I was told to "live a little." This was the snapping point. I told her she needs to live a little less by the looks of it. Hurt feelings or not, I don't care. I'd had enough.
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TheWJordinWJordin wrote: »People bringing food to work to share should be banned. It's never healthy. Co-workers just want to make you fat so they can look better.
Actually, I just enjoy baking, and my coworkers enjoy eating. This seems like a win win situation to both me and them! Plus they like their fancy birthday cakes. It doesn't bother me if folks say no thanks either, or take bits home, or whatever. It would seem quite selfish for one person to insist I stopped when everyone else involved enjoys it. I'd happily support someone who wanted to eat less though, I can definitely understand that, eg by baking their favorites less often, not directly offering it, trying to bring things on their days off instead etc. But I'm the only one with a serious weight problem in my office so it's mostly me declining things/taking smaller portions.9 -
You could save 500 calories for snacks each day. You can either snack at the office, or snack at home at the end of the day.
My other idea is to log your food for the entire day the evening before, so that your calories are already allotted before you step into the office in the morning. If you then choose to have a snack at the office, you'll have to change your food diary for the entire day to make room for it.2 -
TheWJordinWJordin wrote: »People bringing food to work to share should be banned. It's never healthy. Co-workers just want to make you fat so they can look better.
Or, as the OP is doing, people can take personal responsibility & accept that it's their own hands putting that food in their mouths & develop plans for avoiding tempting treats.7 -
What has helped me is waiting. Tell yourself if I feel hungry I will have one later. Sometimes when later comes then the food is gone. If you waited until after lunch then oops it's too close to going home time to have one.
We have one person in the office that always declines the birthday treat at lunch by saying she will have one later and then the social pressure is off and she can then decide later whether she will have one or not.6 -
I have a draw in my desk full of "in your calorie range Kelly " alternatives. I make sure that it is stocked with almond butter, rice cakes, Kind bars, granola, nuts, seeds. The director of marketing constantly walks around with candy to hand out and I simply say no thank you when he stops at the door of my office. We are headed into the fall/holiday season where the break room will be constantly filled with donuts, cookies, fudge, ice cream etc. from our Members and our vendors. I may indulge every once in a great while but I always make sure if fits in my calories by either banking calories and planning for it or getting on that treadmill and burning extra calories to fit it in. Can't expect others to work around your lifestyle, the rest of the office may look forward to her baking and she obviously enjoys it if she is doing it so often. There are always going to be social situations, holidays and celebrations, it's just every day life. Think about why you are changing your lifestyle, why is it important to you and then just stick to it. You are in control of you... You got this!!!4
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Flip over the table.
You cannot tell her to stop baking treats. It is your responsibility to control your own temptation. Eat some fruits, veggies or protein to help you feel not hungry.5 -
You could save 500 calories for snacks each day. You can either snack at the office, or snack at home at the end of the day.
My other idea is to log your food for the entire day the evening before, so that your calories are already allotted before you step into the office in the morning. If you then choose to have a snack at the office, you'll have to change your food diary for the entire day to make room for it.
Wish i had 500 calories to spare for snacks, Itd likely leave me malnourished Being small sometimes sucks haha7 -
I have a friend who is an amazing baker & she takes a lot of things in to her office. I would assume everyone loves her yummy delicious treats. After reading a lot of these posts, I'd be sad to think that some of you would blame her or feel it's her responsibility to limit or selectively offer her treats.6
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What are your tactics for not picking up the fork in other situations? Part of the challenge may be that you have a habit of eating at your desk, or whenever someone brings something in. If that's the case, find something else to do for that routine, like make yourself a nice cup of tea when the sweets come out (or whatever would actually reward you). That way you can still have the social time with colleagues (I'm hoping there are more than just the two of you in the office...) and you don't have to recalculate your whole food diary. But I'd say the two questions to ask yourself when scrummy things are offered are: A) why do I want this? and B ) how badly do I want this? If the answer to A is something like 'everyone else seems to really enjoy it' or 'I don't want to hurt the baker's feelings', you can shake those right off. No making decisions about how others will react.
Since it's the end of the summer holiday season, in my office are chocolate somethings from Russia, dark chocolates from the Caribbean and a regional pastry from France. We are running the risk of all this not being eaten because two of my colleagues aren't really into sweets, two of us are back onto a weight loss track, and the person who'd be most likely to eat is only in the office one day a week. These aren't home made, but they are special and exotic (for the UK), but that doesn't mean I'm willing to spend the calories. So for me, looking at those earlier answers, they're A) because they're there and B ) not very. My reward is the fact that my work clothes fit better and better.
You'll find your pattern to make this work. Do it consciously, figure out your motivation and utilise it. You can TOTALLY do this!!1 -
I apologize for this because sometimes you know these people very well. I imagine them licking their fingers while preparing the dishes and that keeps me away from everything. There is a lot of food at the office that we need to stay away from and this is what does the trick for me. My mom is a licker and I know her, I can only imagine what others might do when they bake or bring food. It all looks too good so when I put that thought in my head I can't do it.4
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Rosemary7391 wrote: »TheWJordinWJordin wrote: »People bringing food to work to share should be banned. It's never healthy. Co-workers just want to make you fat so they can look better.
Actually, I just enjoy baking, and my coworkers enjoy eating. This seems like a win win situation to both me and them! Plus they like their fancy birthday cakes. It doesn't bother me if folks say no thanks either, or take bits home, or whatever. It would seem quite selfish for one person to insist I stopped when everyone else involved enjoys it. I'd happily support someone who wanted to eat less though, I can definitely understand that, eg by baking their favorites less often, not directly offering it, trying to bring things on their days off instead etc. But I'm the only one with a serious weight problem in my office so it's mostly me declining things/taking smaller portions.
Yup, my two main stress responses are cleaning and baking. If the house is clean, I bake. But I have next to no sweet tooth, so if I don't take it in to work, it'll just get tossed, which is a waste.
I would not ever, ever, ever ask a coworker to stop bringing in food to share because it tempts me. That to me crosses so many lines of what is and isn't within my control or my right to ask, and takes away my own agency and responsibility for my body and life. When I bring in food, I take no offense if people pass, or people take it home, or take two, or take half, or whatever else. I would be offended if someone came up to me and asked me to bake less - that'd be like them telling me to do yoga less, or anything else I do on my own time for myself. They're under no obligation to eat what's in the kitchen. The other thing is that you don't know other peoples' lives and don't have the right to control your coworkers - there have been times when the catering tray someone brought in saved my day, because I'd forgotten my lunch, or we have a colleague who is currently undergoing chemo and needs to eat literally anything that appeals to her because she has no appetite, and then some folks are bulking or just don't care. That's up to them, and I don't try to control them by controlling what's on the Free Food table.
For me, when it is something tempting (one coworker's wife makes THE BEST filled cupcakes I've ever eaten) I'll weigh the "is it worth it?"-ness of the item. I'll add it to MFP and see what it does to my day, drink some water, sit with that for five minutes, and then go or not go get it. People bring in all kinds of things - homemade, store-bought, Halloween candy, holiday coookies, fresh produce, and catering trays. I just think of it all as "not my food" - my food is in the fridge, waiting for me. And if I misjudge, pick something up, eat a bite, and it's awful, I immediately wrap it up and toss it (and log the bite). If I let it sit, I will eat it later and hate every bite and that's a small tragedy.6 -
Just don't eat it.
I wouldn't go as far to tell others not to bring items in. That is how they are showing their love for the group. Be polite and decline, take a taste, or fit it into your calorie budget.4 -
I try keep snacks always! I have Kids Clif Z bars brownie & iced oatmeal, protein bars, wheat thins already portioned in snack bags that I keep.. and bring a fruit every morning when those baked goods come around I grabbed my portioned snacks and decline the offer0
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my office is stocked up with flavored rice cakes and mini rice cakes, water flavoring, and a few other things, lol.0
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Just eat the cake.
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This is my biggest issue. I work in a Dental Practice! Yet there is a constant supply of cakes, biscuits and chocolate. Last year we did a 'bake off' where we each picked a week to bake a cake and bring it to be judged. There are 14 members of staff so we had cake every week for 14 weeks and I kid you not I gained 10lbs. Most staff members take a small slither, I take a chunk and go back for more each day. We are about to start bake off 2017!! Considering not even sitting in at lunch break and going for a walk instead to avoid temptation.
I'm the biggest person at the practice and its become a standing joke about how much I eat I would LOVE to show them all!6 -
Just explain your diet and your goals. People undersand vegans and vegetarians, they have to understand less sugar.
And Diabetes runs in your family, so you are trying to eat healthier now.2 -
So this will probably sound a little mean, but I accept the treats... and then throw them away.
I always admire what the baker has made and thank them, or take my slice of the birthday cake or whatever, but afterward I take it to my desk, wrap it in a napkin, squish it up in my hand, and throw it in the garbage. No feelings hurt, no calories consumed, and it makes me feel pretty good about my willpower, too.7 -
I have previously asked her decrease how often she was baking and she did for a few weeks.
Is this not completely baffling to anyone else? I would never dream of telling a coworker, even one I'm close friends with, to stop bringing in baking so often because I'M trying to lose weight.
OP, she's not shoving cupcakes down your throat, is she? Exercise some self-control and allow your coworkers to do whatever they want to do.
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No one brings in homemade baked goods in my office but we DO get a lot of free junk from other businesses...sub sandwich samples from Jimmy Johns, chips & salsa from a catering co., donuts from sales reps and then 10X that during the holidays when we get fudge, toffee, huge boxes of chocolates.
I make little rules for myself. I don't like bagels, muffins, or store bought cookies & cake. I could care less about a lot of candy. I DO love See's caramels with dark chocolate so I'll allow myself one piece per day. I DO love donuts so I'll have one with a black coffee when they're delivered (fortunately it's only a few times per year, if it was every week I wouldn't).
As for the (miniature) sandwiches, I only take one when I know I'm gonna have a late light lunch. Otherwise nope. Not worth screwing up my planned meal.
I also have a no snacking rule at work. I don't bring in stuff to graze on. I don't consider my desk or office to be a place where I eat. Period. This makes it easier. I have whatever treat I decide to have in the breakroom sitting at a table, not at my desk.1 -
clayelliott847 wrote: »Just explain your diet and your goals. People undersand vegans and vegetarians, they have to understand less sugar.
And Diabetes runs in your family, so you are trying to eat healthier now.
It's nobody's business but your own. Giving people too much information opens you up to unwanted advice. I would NEVER discuss my eating preferences to my coworkers.10 -
lindseymartin1 wrote: »
I'm the biggest person at the practice and its become a standing joke about how much I eat I would LOVE to show them all!
This right here, is harassment. Let it be known that you will take appropriate action if it doesn't stop.
Body shaming isn't cool on ANY spectrum.9 -
I have previously asked her decrease how often she was baking and she did for a few weeks.
Is this not completely baffling to anyone else? I would never dream of telling a coworker, even one I'm close friends with, to stop bringing in baking so often because I'M trying to lose weight.
OP, she's not shoving cupcakes down your throat, is she? Exercise some self-control and allow your coworkers to do whatever they want to do.
Yep, baffles me, too.5 -
Now, I just really want cake, lol5
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What is your advice for not picking up that fork? Make sure I'm not hungry? That I have enough food here to have some alternative healthy thing? Thanks!
I just had to accept that I wasn't going to be able to eat all the food I wanted whenever I wanted.
Someone baked cupcakes a while back at work. I love cupcakes and I have nothing against having treats, but I couldn't make them fit into my day so I didn't have any. Really didn't bother me. It's not like it was the last cupcake in the world or I would never have another cupcake again.
Denying yourself today doesn't mean denying yourself forever.5 -
lindseymartin1 wrote: »This is my biggest issue. I work in a Dental Practice! Yet there is a constant supply of cakes, biscuits and chocolate. Last year we did a 'bake off' where we each picked a week to bake a cake and bring it to be judged. There are 14 members of staff so we had cake every week for 14 weeks and I kid you not I gained 10lbs. Most staff members take a small slither, I take a chunk and go back for more each day. We are about to start bake off 2017!! Considering not even sitting in at lunch break and going for a walk instead to avoid temptation.
I'm the biggest person at the practice and its become a standing joke about how much I eat I would LOVE to show them all!
That's rough with them joking about it
Just out of interest, I calculated the calories in my favourite celebration cake recipe+decoration.... yikes. 23000 for the whole thing. Admittedly not every calorie will make it from bowl/pan/board to the actual cake, but yeah... there's a reason that one gets cut up small enough to do a little piece for everyone at church! About 40 servings. More than half the calories are the outer layers - it's cake, then a 1/4 inch of chocolate ganache, then fondant. Maybe skipping the frosting might help control the calories a bit? I don't mind folks taking that off but I'd be miffed if entire pieces went in the bin - especially at work, since we have enough people on our floor that it always goes.0 -
lindseymartin1 wrote: »I'm the biggest person at the practice and its become a standing joke about how much I eat I would LOVE to show them all!
That is just plain mean. I'm sorry.0
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