Don't know where to start! Addicted to takeaway food and miserable about weight!
stucks7udent
Posts: 11 Member
Hello everyone,
I'm sure this isn't going to be a new discussion on a forum such as this. I've just joined in a bid to sort out my terrible eating habits.
A little bit about myself:
Gender: Female
Age: 23
Weight at current: Around 14 stone 4lbs (need to reconfirm but 2 weeks ago it was this)
Goal weight: Currently 10 stone would be great!
I've been overweight for 8 years now, gradually reaching this point - my heaviest. Have numerous health issues, possibly relating to my weight.
I REALLY struggle with strong cravings for anything junk related. Sweets/chocolate, crisps, cream cakes and most recently, takeaway food. Even if I cook myself a meal, by late at night, I'm craving any kind of takeaway and will order £10+ worth of food for myself. I'm usually not even hungry, but the intense craving won't go until I've eaten it. It's crippling my bank account and more so, my health. I feel horrible most of the time: unwell, tired, stomach aches, miserable. I just can't be bothered with life really - not in a suicidal sense, but in that everything is too much effort and laying in my bed is all I want to do.
I NEED and WANT to lose weight. I don't see a future really where I'm this overweight.
I've previously had gym members and it's resulted in being a total waste of money. I can't seem to stick to eating healthy for more than a few days.
I don't know where to start or how to motivate myself to stick to anything.
I will be sticking around and giving this method a go.
Thanks to anyone who reads this post and look forwards to reading other peoples experiences and successes!
I'm sure this isn't going to be a new discussion on a forum such as this. I've just joined in a bid to sort out my terrible eating habits.
A little bit about myself:
Gender: Female
Age: 23
Weight at current: Around 14 stone 4lbs (need to reconfirm but 2 weeks ago it was this)
Goal weight: Currently 10 stone would be great!
I've been overweight for 8 years now, gradually reaching this point - my heaviest. Have numerous health issues, possibly relating to my weight.
I REALLY struggle with strong cravings for anything junk related. Sweets/chocolate, crisps, cream cakes and most recently, takeaway food. Even if I cook myself a meal, by late at night, I'm craving any kind of takeaway and will order £10+ worth of food for myself. I'm usually not even hungry, but the intense craving won't go until I've eaten it. It's crippling my bank account and more so, my health. I feel horrible most of the time: unwell, tired, stomach aches, miserable. I just can't be bothered with life really - not in a suicidal sense, but in that everything is too much effort and laying in my bed is all I want to do.
I NEED and WANT to lose weight. I don't see a future really where I'm this overweight.
I've previously had gym members and it's resulted in being a total waste of money. I can't seem to stick to eating healthy for more than a few days.
I don't know where to start or how to motivate myself to stick to anything.
I will be sticking around and giving this method a go.
Thanks to anyone who reads this post and look forwards to reading other peoples experiences and successes!
4
Replies
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I suspect this is about the usual suspects - the combined forces of longing for good taste and mouthfeel, and the narrow - no, restrictive - definition of healthy food. Eating way too much junkfood way too often has both created a strong habit with strong reinforcers, and dulled your tastebuds so that many normal foods taste bland or too strong.
Everybody wants to lose weight, but that's not enough, we have to stop eating too much. Junk food is calorie dense, so easy to eat too much. If you stop wanting to eat too much, it will be quite easy to lose weight.
Your situation as presented has a couple of good incentives - you want to save money and you want to feel better and more energetic. Cooking more from scratch can be hitting two birds with one stone.
The crux is to find healthy meals you like. It shouldn't be too difficult. Look up recipes, find something that looks appealing. Write down the ingredients - this will be your shopping list - go shopping - cook - eat, enjoy. Rinse, repeat. Not that difficult, it takes an effort - not more effort, but a different effort.8 -
Have you spoken to a medical professional about the possibility of depression? It's not at all uncommon to turn to food to cope. You won't make any headway if you're treating symptoms rather than causes.stucks7udent wrote: »I just can't be bothered with life really - not in a suicidal sense, but in that everything is too much effort and laying in my bed is all I want to do.
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I know it seems impossible at first. And yes, junk food is delicious! I'd suggest starting with one small change at a time. It could have nothing to do with eating. You could commit to walking for 10 minutes a day for one week and then up it to 20 minutes a day. You could commit to not eating after 8 p.m. You could commit to rewarding yourself with money every time you don't order take out. Telling yourself you won't ever eat sugar or junk food is a losing proposition because life happens. Find one small change you can make and stick to and then do it.
It sounds like your cravings have nothing to do with hunger, so eating an apple instead won't work. If you could find something else to do to distract yourself from the cravings, that might help. Or, say to yourself, if I really want take out in 30 minutes, I can have it. By then, you may have changed your mind. If you haven't, order only half of what you normally would.
Finally, add some friends here (maybe you already have?). This is an amazing group of people and I guarantee if you post something on your page, your friends will lovingly support you. Good luck!2 -
Have you spoken to a medical professional about the possibility of depression? It's not at all uncommon to turn to food to cope. You won't make any headway if you're treating symptoms rather than causes.stucks7udent wrote: »I just can't be bothered with life really - not in a suicidal sense, but in that everything is too much effort and laying in my bed is all I want to do.
this.3 -
Hello. Everyone struggles with some type of food or activity that is a trigger to eat, and for me, even when I'm not really hungry. For example, after a long day, I enjoy watching a game on TV, but that's a trigger for me to snack. I used to easily put away 500-1,000 calories in snacking after dinner - a few cookies, a piece of cheese with crackers, a cold beer. That's 50% of my daily calories! Crazy!
Your brain is powerful, but it can be retrained. It tells you you need take-away, or salty food, or fatty food. For me, chips and cheese were slowly adding on the pounds. Now, I do this. First, when I'm enjoying a show on TV, and I want a snack, I force myself to first drink a glass of water and eat an apple. You would be amazed how often just doing this makes my craving go away. Second, I keep a pack of sugar free gum next to my chair. I'll pop in a piece of gum and chew for 20 minutes before I think about food. Third, I have some potato chips...but only once in awhile, and a very small serving. I've gone from daily bowls of chips and cookies to the occasional small serving of chips or one cookie. The change is remarkable, but it takes time. It took me over a month - probably almost two - before I really went without craving junk food all the time. Now, I actually enjoy the apple at night, and hardly ever buy the chips.
The other thing I forced myself to do was walk. I hate the gym. Why go to a place you hate? But you can pop in some earbuds, pick out a great playlist and walk for 30 minutes. This helps get you away from the place that you have your cravings, and walking is a great way to start getting active. I've found now I don't hate the gym, but I use it to keep at other exercise.
I'm not where I want to be yet - it's a long journey. But, I am eating less junk, dropping a few pounds and I feel better.
The other posts about finding good recipes, and make a shopping list are great ideas. You need to form new habits. They will come. It will feel forced for a bit, but after awhile, you will just adapt to this new lifestyle.
Lastly, create a new financial goal you want to save for. A trip or something to you want to buy. Take the money you spend on takeaway and put it into a separate account. Every time you resist the urge, add that money to your savings plan. In a year, you'll be healthier, happier, fitter, and have some $$$ to spend on yourself.
Good luck and keep on this website. Many amazing people on here willing to help, because we have all been there.2 -
TavistockToad wrote: »
Have you spoken to a medical professional about the possibility of depression? It's not at all uncommon to turn to food to cope. You won't make any headway if you're treating symptoms rather than causes.stucks7udent wrote: »I just can't be bothered with life really - not in a suicidal sense, but in that everything is too much effort and laying in my bed is all I want to do.
this.
Yes. And get some bloodwork done - low Vit D, for example, can lead people to feel depressed, tired, unmotivated. Such a simple fix. Wont help you lose weight, but may lift your mood enough to get yourself moving.
3 -
How are you during the day? If you are not super hungry during the day you could try intermittent fasting to bank those calories until later, or just eat very small meals to save calories. I have amazing control during the day and sh!tty self control at night, so I stopped fighting it and i IF now, it works well for my lifestyle. You can order take out but maybe order something healthy with a SMALL side of one thing that you're craving (I'll order a salad with salmon and a small side of fries). Focus on Calories (not eating more than you burn) then focus on Protein and getting plenty of it. This might help your energy and also help keep you satisfied. Exercise can be great if you want to have more calories to eat and still lose weight and tone up a bit but it is not necessary. There are many ways of losing weight, you just gotta find what works for you. But the keys to focus on are Calories and Protein.1
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TavistockToad wrote: »
Have you spoken to a medical professional about the possibility of depression? It's not at all uncommon to turn to food to cope. You won't make any headway if you're treating symptoms rather than causes.stucks7udent wrote: »I just can't be bothered with life really - not in a suicidal sense, but in that everything is too much effort and laying in my bed is all I want to do.
this.
Yes. And get some bloodwork done - low Vit D, for example, can lead people to feel depressed, tired, unmotivated. Such a simple fix. Wont help you lose weight, but may lift your mood enough to get yourself moving.
Also this! Low vit d kicked my *kitten*.1 -
Have you spoken to a medical professional about the possibility of depression? It's not at all uncommon to turn to food to cope. You won't make any headway if you're treating symptoms rather than causes.stucks7udent wrote: »I just can't be bothered with life really - not in a suicidal sense, but in that everything is too much effort and laying in my bed is all I want to do.
I've been very aware of the fact I turn to food when I feel any sort of negative emotion for a long long time - boredom, anger, upset, general lowness, anxiety etc. I'm sure the list would go on. I've spoken to doctors regarding anxiety previous, as it is a trigger to a medical issue I have. But the leading information I have received was useless 'calm down' and offered some tablets.
I opted to avoid the tablets as it seemed like a brush off, when really I was looking for more 'talking' help rather than a tablet I'm going to rely on to be 'okay'.
In a sense, I feel I personally need to drag myself out of this hole I've dug myself into and that starts by fixing the predominant issue in my life at current - my weight and poor eating habits. It's just being able to commit myself for long enough to feel a change and keep me driving in that direction.
Vitamin
I've had numerous blood works done in the past few months, some specific to issues I have and others a general tests for anything/everything shows as fine. So I would presume I'm all okay on that front. But I may make an appointment to ask about this.emmydoodles83 wrote: »How are you during the day? If you are not super hungry during the day you could try intermittent fasting to bank those calories until later, or just eat very small meals to save calories. I have amazing control during the day and sh!tty self control at night, so I stopped fighting it and i IF now, it works well for my lifestyle. You can order take out but maybe order something healthy with a SMALL side of one thing that you're craving (I'll order a salad with salmon and a small side of fries). Focus on Calories (not eating more than you burn) then focus on Protein and getting plenty of it. This might help your energy and also help keep you satisfied. Exercise can be great if you want to have more calories to eat and still lose weight and tone up a bit but it is not necessary. There are many ways of losing weight, you just gotta find what works for you. But the keys to focus on are Calories and Protein.
Day time, as long as I'm not alone or at home (so at work for example), I'm okay. Limited opportunity to go on a snacking session and as I'm busy, I guess I don't think about it too much unless I'm hungry. My choices of fo od could be better for breaks I'd say, but I don't feel the need to binge. Night time is definitely the worst for me - maybe because it's a time I know I should avoid eating so my cravings seem far stronger.
Thank you everyone for the advice, making notes as I speak.0 -
stucks7udent wrote: »
Have you spoken to a medical professional about the possibility of depression? It's not at all uncommon to turn to food to cope. You won't make any headway if you're treating symptoms rather than causes.stucks7udent wrote: »I just can't be bothered with life really - not in a suicidal sense, but in that everything is too much effort and laying in my bed is all I want to do.
I've been very aware of the fact I turn to food when I feel any sort of negative emotion for a long long time - boredom, anger, upset, general lowness, anxiety etc. I'm sure the list would go on. I've spoken to doctors regarding anxiety previous, as it is a trigger to a medical issue I have. But the leading information I have received was useless 'calm down' and offered some tablets.
I opted to avoid the tablets as it seemed like a brush off, when really I was looking for more 'talking' help rather than a tablet I'm going to rely on to be 'okay'.
In a sense, I feel I personally need to drag myself out of this hole I've dug myself into and that starts by fixing the predominant issue in my life at current - my weight and poor eating habits. It's just being able to commit myself for long enough to feel a change and keep me driving in that direction.
Vitamin
I've had numerous blood works done in the past few months, some specific to issues I have and others a general tests for anything/everything shows as fine. So I would presume I'm all okay on that front. But I may make an appointment to ask about this.emmydoodles83 wrote: »How are you during the day? If you are not super hungry during the day you could try intermittent fasting to bank those calories until later, or just eat very small meals to save calories. I have amazing control during the day and sh!tty self control at night, so I stopped fighting it and i IF now, it works well for my lifestyle. You can order take out but maybe order something healthy with a SMALL side of one thing that you're craving (I'll order a salad with salmon and a small side of fries). Focus on Calories (not eating more than you burn) then focus on Protein and getting plenty of it. This might help your energy and also help keep you satisfied. Exercise can be great if you want to have more calories to eat and still lose weight and tone up a bit but it is not necessary. There are many ways of losing weight, you just gotta find what works for you. But the keys to focus on are Calories and Protein.
Day time, as long as I'm not alone or at home (so at work for example), I'm okay. Limited opportunity to go on a snacking session and as I'm busy, I guess I don't think about it too much unless I'm hungry. My choices of fo od could be better for breaks I'd say, but I don't feel the need to binge. Night time is definitely the worst for me - maybe because it's a time I know I should avoid eating so my cravings seem far stronger.
Thank you everyone for the advice, making notes as I speak.
i would go back to the doctor and ask for a referral for some CBT. there is a bit of a waiting list for it on the NHS, but it would be worth it.2 -
I suggest a book, Habit by Duhigg. There's nothing inherent in junk food that insists it be eaten. Indeed you go to a lot of effort to bring it in to your home. The late night snacking is meeting a need. Find more productive ways of meeting that need and you will be better prepared to redirect your compulsion to eat late at night.
I think exercise might be a decent replacement. I think you are working off excess stress and energy. Carbohydrates have a sedative effect.1 -
stucks7udent wrote: »
Have you spoken to a medical professional about the possibility of depression? It's not at all uncommon to turn to food to cope. You won't make any headway if you're treating symptoms rather than causes.stucks7udent wrote: »I just can't be bothered with life really - not in a suicidal sense, but in that everything is too much effort and laying in my bed is all I want to do.
I've been very aware of the fact I turn to food when I feel any sort of negative emotion for a long long time - boredom, anger, upset, general lowness, anxiety etc. I'm sure the list would go on. I've spoken to doctors regarding anxiety previous, as it is a trigger to a medical issue I have. But the leading information I have received was useless 'calm down' and offered some tablets.
I opted to avoid the tablets as it seemed like a brush off, when really I was looking for more 'talking' help rather than a tablet I'm going to rely on to be 'okay'.
In a sense, I feel I personally need to drag myself out of this hole I've dug myself into and that starts by fixing the predominant issue in my life at current - my weight and poor eating habits. It's just being able to commit myself for long enough to feel a change and keep me driving in that direction.
Vitamin
I've had numerous blood works done in the past few months, some specific to issues I have and others a general tests for anything/everything shows as fine. So I would presume I'm all okay on that front. But I may make an appointment to ask about this.emmydoodles83 wrote: »How are you during the day? If you are not super hungry during the day you could try intermittent fasting to bank those calories until later, or just eat very small meals to save calories. I have amazing control during the day and sh!tty self control at night, so I stopped fighting it and i IF now, it works well for my lifestyle. You can order take out but maybe order something healthy with a SMALL side of one thing that you're craving (I'll order a salad with salmon and a small side of fries). Focus on Calories (not eating more than you burn) then focus on Protein and getting plenty of it. This might help your energy and also help keep you satisfied. Exercise can be great if you want to have more calories to eat and still lose weight and tone up a bit but it is not necessary. There are many ways of losing weight, you just gotta find what works for you. But the keys to focus on are Calories and Protein.
Day time, as long as I'm not alone or at home (so at work for example), I'm okay. Limited opportunity to go on a snacking session and as I'm busy, I guess I don't think about it too much unless I'm hungry. My choices of fo od could be better for breaks I'd say, but I don't feel the need to binge. Night time is definitely the worst for me - maybe because it's a time I know I should avoid eating so my cravings seem far stronger.
Thank you everyone for the advice, making notes as I speak.
Start with small easy changes, make the daytime snacks healthier and less calories, utilize the time when you have more control to try to save most of your calories for the time you seem to want them most. Next I would pick a few good choices on some of those take out menus, and couple of side options that will help your cravings, so you have preplanned options and there isn't a choice to make. The hardest part will be ordering it without adding anything, just order quickly and don't think about it. Once you've eaten something healthier with that small side of something not, you might find you are ok with that and satisfied. Preplanning and being prepared can help you by taking the bad choices out as an option. as an aside someone said vitamin D, I agree just because they are finding most people are Vitamin D deficient so it's just a good idea to supplement
I know you said everything was normal with bloodwork, but remember the low end of normal is not optimal, it's just enough to keep you from getting sick/negative consequences. Best thing my Doc ( I work for) ever told me about nutrition. 3 -
stucks7udent wrote: »
Have you spoken to a medical professional about the possibility of depression? It's not at all uncommon to turn to food to cope. You won't make any headway if you're treating symptoms rather than causes.stucks7udent wrote: »I just can't be bothered with life really - not in a suicidal sense, but in that everything is too much effort and laying in my bed is all I want to do.
I've been very aware of the fact I turn to food when I feel any sort of negative emotion for a long long time - boredom, anger, upset, general lowness, anxiety etc. I'm sure the list would go on. I've spoken to doctors regarding anxiety previous, as it is a trigger to a medical issue I have. But the leading information I have received was useless 'calm down' and offered some tablets.
I opted to avoid the tablets as it seemed like a brush off, when really I was looking for more 'talking' help rather than a tablet I'm going to rely on to be 'okay'.
In a sense, I feel I personally need to drag myself out of this hole I've dug myself into and that starts by fixing the predominant issue in my life at current - my weight and poor eating habits. It's just being able to commit myself for long enough to feel a change and keep me driving in that direction.
Vitamin
I've had numerous blood works done in the past few months, some specific to issues I have and others a general tests for anything/everything shows as fine. So I would presume I'm all okay on that front. But I may make an appointment to ask about this.emmydoodles83 wrote: »How are you during the day? If you are not super hungry during the day you could try intermittent fasting to bank those calories until later, or just eat very small meals to save calories. I have amazing control during the day and sh!tty self control at night, so I stopped fighting it and i IF now, it works well for my lifestyle. You can order take out but maybe order something healthy with a SMALL side of one thing that you're craving (I'll order a salad with salmon and a small side of fries). Focus on Calories (not eating more than you burn) then focus on Protein and getting plenty of it. This might help your energy and also help keep you satisfied. Exercise can be great if you want to have more calories to eat and still lose weight and tone up a bit but it is not necessary. There are many ways of losing weight, you just gotta find what works for you. But the keys to focus on are Calories and Protein.
Day time, as long as I'm not alone or at home (so at work for example), I'm okay. Limited opportunity to go on a snacking session and as I'm busy, I guess I don't think about it too much unless I'm hungry. My choices of fo od could be better for breaks I'd say, but I don't feel the need to binge. Night time is definitely the worst for me - maybe because it's a time I know I should avoid eating so my cravings seem far stronger.
Thank you everyone for the advice, making notes as I speak.
Any reasoning for the bolded part? There was one more point I wanted to address, but decided to wait out - fear of food. If you feel that food has power over you, even magical powers ("calories eaten after 6 PM stick to your hips"), it's very difficult to resist cravings. Our current food environment is hard to navigate. You need a basic understanding of nutrition, eating behavior and social dynamics.2 -
As far as cooking, perhaps you might want to try a meal delivery service as a way to get you motivated to cook. I was eating take out a lot a year ago because my job was so demanding (and I hated it). Of course the best thing that happened to me was to lose the job, but even before that, in order to resume cooking, I got a meal recipe delivery each week. I was able to ease back into cooking without having to plan and grocery shop. I love to cook, so once I got back into it after a few months I was able to cut back on the meal delivery and plan myself. Because the food was so good I looked forward to it. It is not cheap but it was cheaper than eating 2-3 meals a day out! It also was healthier and less calories. There are a lot of issues to your situation, which some already addressed, but I wanted to include this as something to consider. I won't recommend any particular company but from your language sounds like you are in the UK and I believe you have some of these services there too. (I'm in the USA).1
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Seems as if you have a very unhealthy relationship with food in general.
Maybe see a therapist, start a proven training regime that focuses on compound lifts (Thinner Leaner Stronger, StrongCurves, StrongLifts5x5, etc), track everything you eat (MFP) and learn about proper diet and exercise so you can start making informed food choices.
"Healthy" food is rarely bland, you may just be so used to high levels of salt, fat, sugar, etc. that you cannot appreciate it yet.
Tastes and flavors are subjective but you will lose most of your "cravings" over time, especially when you stop indulging in them.
Every time you have a "craving" drink about 12oz of water and then wait about 30 minutes before deciding to eat. You are usually not "hungry" but are just accustomed to eating.
Another method is to mix a scoop or two of whey protein in that glass instead of just plain water.
You choose to give in to "cravings." No one can fix that for you.
You are not "addicted" unless you have knocked over a few gas stations to buy takeout food.
Saying you are "addicted" externalizes the problem (you eat more than you need) as if it is beyond your control.
Take responsibility for your choices.
Also, stop thinking in "Stones" of weight and marginalizing the numbers by using bigger units of measure.
Be honest with yourself and your goals: you weigh about 200+lbs and want to get down to about 140lbs.
You can do that in about 40 to 50 weeks at a safe and reasonable rate.
Yes, it could take 6 months to a year to lose 60lbs safely and effectively.
You need realistic expectations also.
I recommend all of the women I coach read "Thinner Leaner Stronger" because it teaches about diet, exercise, useless supplements, fake diet pills, and more.
In short, get more "exercise" so your body needs more calories to maintain your weight but eat fewer calories than that number and you will lose "weight".
If you will not develop the discipline to make better choices regarding diet and exercise then you will not reach your goals.
Make better choices instead of making excuses.2 -
I spent many years working nightshifts, and although i stopped ten years ago now i still used to eat at 9pm 10pm,up to about 19months ago when i started my weightloss, which i'm sure added to my weight problems.
so definately not eating after 8pm( actually in my case 7pm ) this really helps.
And i usually walk every day, again when i first started it was only 10 minutes a day.
As other people have said, maybe you should be seeking medical advice regarding your eating habits.
In my own case regarding take away food , chocolate, crisps, fizzy drinks etc i just stopped eating it going 'cold Turkey' so to speak, i knew that if i had a square of chocolate i would want the bar, or a bag of crisps i'd want the multipack.....i know not everyone will agree with this, but if we don't change our eating habits, etc we won't change our bodies.
i have also put in quite a few posts that i feel that 'mindset' is key,and that i my case is why for 49yrs of my life i didn't lose weight- and now i am.
good luck on your Journey, there are lots of great people on here, so use their knowledge , but definately seek some medical advice.
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Believe me I know exactly what you're talking about
I was a food addict, severely depressed, eating 1000s of cals in junk food daily. I gained 10 stone and ended up with all the metabolic diseases.
I eventually got to the 'last straw' and started looking for help like you are now. I found a personal trainer and the results have been spectacular. I didn't know that at the time.
That was 12 weeks ago and I've not eaten any junk food since I started. There is a lot more I can share, if you'd like to chat then message me.1 -
You could also benefit from meal templates and working in good eating habits that way whenever you do takeaway.
Some references suggest eating 1/2 plate veggies (salad, broccoli, green beans, cabbage), 1/4 plate lean protein (fish, chicken, tofu, etc), 1/4 plate starchy carbs (rice, potato, pasta).
http://www.denbahamas.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/plate-planner-guide.jpg
Work with your habits, add good things to your life, keep progressing, it's just about learning and data points.
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emmydoodles83 wrote: »
Start with small easy changes, make the daytime snacks healthier and less calories, utilize the time when you have more control to try to save most of your calories for the time you seem to want them most. Next I would pick a few good choices on some of those take out menus, and couple of side options that will help your cravings, so you have preplanned options and there isn't a choice to make. The hardest part will be ordering it without adding anything, just order quickly and don't think about it. Once you've eaten something healthier with that small side of something not, you might find you are ok with that and satisfied. Preplanning and being prepared can help you by taking the bad choices out as an option. as an aside someone said vitamin D, I agree just because they are finding most people are Vitamin D deficient so it's just a good idea to supplement I know you said everything was normal with bloodwork, but remember the low end of normal is not optimal, it's just enough to keep you from getting sick/negative consequences. Best thing my Doc ( I work for) ever told me about nutrition.
This is true, and something I never considered. It's definitely something I will look at, could be a simple fix and worth a try. Thank you.lucerorojo wrote: »As far as cooking, perhaps you might want to try a meal delivery service as a way to get you motivated to cook. I was eating take out a lot a year ago because my job was so demanding (and I hated it). Of course the best thing that happened to me was to lose the job, but even before that, in order to resume cooking, I got a meal recipe delivery each week. I was able to ease back into cooking without having to plan and grocery shop. I love to cook, so once I got back into it after a few months I was able to cut back on the meal delivery and plan myself. Because the food was so good I looked forward to it. It is not cheap but it was cheaper than eating 2-3 meals a day out! It also was healthier and less calories. There are a lot of issues to your situation, which some already addressed, but I wanted to include this as something to consider. I won't recommend any particular company but from your language sounds like you are in the UK and I believe you have some of these services there too. (I'm in the USA).
I actually enjoy cooking, if I am home, I will cook from scratch for family. It's just that on top of this, I will eat takeaway food too - more so if I'm away from home. Less people to judge me and super accessible with the all the services around me. I like this idea however, but it would be an expensive option I believe.Seems as if you have a very unhealthy relationship with food in general.
Maybe see a therapist, start a proper training regime (Thinner Leaner Stronger, StrongCurves, StrongLifts5x5, etc), track everything you eat (MFP) and learn about proper diet and exercise so you can start making informed food choices.
"Healthy" food is rarely bland, you may just be so used to high levels of salt, fat, sugar, etc. that you cannot appreciate it yet.
Tastes and flavors are subjective but you will lose most of your "cravings" over time, especially when you stop indulging in them.
Every time you have a "craving" drink about 12oz of water and then wait about 30 minutes before deciding to eat. You are usually not "hungry" but are just accustomed to eating.
Another method is to mix a scoop or two of whey protein in that glass instead of just plain water.
You choose to give in to "cravings." No one can fix that for you.
You are not "addicted" unless you have knocked over a few gas stations to buy takeout food.
Saying you are "addicted" externalizes the problem (you eat more than you need) as if it is beyond your control.
Take responsibility for your choices.
Also, stop thinking in "Stones" of weight and marginalizing the numbers by using bigger units of measure.
Be honest with yourself and your goals: you weigh about 200+lbs and want to get down to about 140lbs.
You can do that in about 40 to 50 weeks at a safe and reasonable rate.
Yes, it could take 6 months to a year to lose 60lbs safely and effectively.
You need realistic expectations also.
I recommend all of the women I coach read "Thinner Leaner Stronger" because it teaches about diet, exercise, useless supplements, fake diet pills, and more.
You are right with regards to my relationship with food. And I like the suggestion of drinking 30 minutes before eating - I don't drink enough anyway.
I do choose to give into craving, I often have talks with my parents as they've seen me very miserable over the years because of my weight. They've said, and I agree, I either need to make a change or accept this is who I am - nobody can make changes for me. It has to be me. And I know this, but it doesn't make it easier unfortunately.
I usually do count in lbs, but it's actually easier for me to quantify. I used stones and lbs in this instance as it's what it asked for when I signed up ; rather than me trying to lie to myself about the situation. If anything, I'm less hung up on the numbers and more concerned about the way I look and feel. I can see and feel I'm overweight. I could weight 400lbs, ultimately doesn't matter, because currently I'm not content with the way I look. If this makes sense.
I'd like to lose my weight by next summer - I have some big events coming up, a graduation for one, where I know I don't want to look this way in my photographs.
I very much appreciate your advice, it makes sense and will take it on board.1 -
emmydoodles83 wrote: »stucks7udent wrote: »
Have you spoken to a medical professional about the possibility of depression? It's not at all uncommon to turn to food to cope. You won't make any headway if you're treating symptoms rather than causes.stucks7udent wrote: »I just can't be bothered with life really - not in a suicidal sense, but in that everything is too much effort and laying in my bed is all I want to do.
I've been very aware of the fact I turn to food when I feel any sort of negative emotion for a long long time - boredom, anger, upset, general lowness, anxiety etc. I'm sure the list would go on. I've spoken to doctors regarding anxiety previous, as it is a trigger to a medical issue I have. But the leading information I have received was useless 'calm down' and offered some tablets.
I opted to avoid the tablets as it seemed like a brush off, when really I was looking for more 'talking' help rather than a tablet I'm going to rely on to be 'okay'.
In a sense, I feel I personally need to drag myself out of this hole I've dug myself into and that starts by fixing the predominant issue in my life at current - my weight and poor eating habits. It's just being able to commit myself for long enough to feel a change and keep me driving in that direction.
Vitamin
I've had numerous blood works done in the past few months, some specific to issues I have and others a general tests for anything/everything shows as fine. So I would presume I'm all okay on that front. But I may make an appointment to ask about this.emmydoodles83 wrote: »How are you during the day? If you are not super hungry during the day you could try intermittent fasting to bank those calories until later, or just eat very small meals to save calories. I have amazing control during the day and sh!tty self control at night, so I stopped fighting it and i IF now, it works well for my lifestyle. You can order take out but maybe order something healthy with a SMALL side of one thing that you're craving (I'll order a salad with salmon and a small side of fries). Focus on Calories (not eating more than you burn) then focus on Protein and getting plenty of it. This might help your energy and also help keep you satisfied. Exercise can be great if you want to have more calories to eat and still lose weight and tone up a bit but it is not necessary. There are many ways of losing weight, you just gotta find what works for you. But the keys to focus on are Calories and Protein.
Day time, as long as I'm not alone or at home (so at work for example), I'm okay. Limited opportunity to go on a snacking session and as I'm busy, I guess I don't think about it too much unless I'm hungry. My choices of fo od could be better for breaks I'd say, but I don't feel the need to binge. Night time is definitely the worst for me - maybe because it's a time I know I should avoid eating so my cravings seem far stronger.
Thank you everyone for the advice, making notes as I speak.
Start with small easy changes, make the daytime snacks healthier and less calories, utilize the time when you have more control to try to save most of your calories for the time you seem to want them most. Next I would pick a few good choices on some of those take out menus, and couple of side options that will help your cravings, so you have preplanned options and there isn't a choice to make. The hardest part will be ordering it without adding anything, just order quickly and don't think about it. Once you've eaten something healthier with that small side of something not, you might find you are ok with that and satisfied. Preplanning and being prepared can help you by taking the bad choices out as an option. as an aside someone said vitamin D, I agree just because they are finding most people are Vitamin D deficient so it's just a good idea to supplement I know you said everything was normal with bloodwork, but remember the low end of normal is not optimal, it's just enough to keep you from getting sick/negative consequences. Best thing my Doc ( I work for) ever told me about nutrition.
Yes I was going to say the same thing. Most people are low on Vit D, and its hard to overdose without going totally nuts, so supplementing (while waiting for a test even) is fairly harmless. It could take a few days/weeks to make an impact if it is going to, so just add it to your arsenal.1 -
So are you living at home? Who is cooking the meals that you are eating and then afterwards ordering take away? If you don't like what is being served for dinner, can you just skip it? It would be cheaper and easier (and perhaps healthier) to eat the dinner with your family, BUT if you don't like what they are cooking, then eating one meal is better than eating two (the take away afterwards). Can you plan to cook ahead of time for the family and prepare something you really enjoy? So much that you will not need to eat take away later?0
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What if every time you had that strong craving, you did some sort of workout or drank a bunch of tea or water? If you went for a short walk and drank a bunch of water every night when tempted to order take out, would it divert your attention and take some energy away from wanting to go get food? Or what if you created a reward system? Instead of spending the 10 on the food, for every night you don't, you put 5 away for a special reward that you want? It would save money plus give you a reward allowance?0
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As with anyone who struggles with food addictions there's often multiple facets as to why this is happening. I am a binge eater - I don't ever say "was" because any day could trigger that for me - and historically I have eaten 4,000 calories in one sitting.
Until about 6 months ago I never talked to anyone about it, and I never really ate in front of people so that's why many people didn't understand how I'd ever got "so big". But I did talk to a counsellor who specializes in eating disorders and trauma. I was in a very mentally and emotionally abusive relationship for 6 years. I am, overall, a fairly successful person: I have a graduate degree, I own my home, I pay my own bills, I have lost 100+ lbs on my own, I have a great career that's just starting out with an (almost) endless amount of possibilities, I have friends who love me, an amazing family and I volunteer in my community. I also run and work out 5-6 days/week. So by most standards I have a pretty fulfilling life, but I often still feel empty and overwhelmingly alone. I am one of the few single friends left, everyone around me has a partner and/or family and is settling down . . I am still single, alone, no one wants to settle down with me. And often that was a contributing factor to bingeing, but the real reason I do it is because of high-functioning depression, and slight OCD. When things aren't perfect it's like EVERYTHING might as well be falling apart; my schedule and my life has to be in place or else nothing is in place. I struggle with feeling like I am never good enough. Just ran 5K? Well, didn't do it as fast as I wanted to. Lost 10 lbs? yeh, well my goal was 12 . . . and on and on and on. When I was going to binge I would turn to chips, breads, bagels . . . anything high in processed carbs. Why? Because those foods mimic a dopamine spike in brain, which is similar to how anti-depressants work. I am not on any medication, but I do struggle with high-functioning depression.
Anyways, my point is that if the one counsellor you saw wasn't a good fit for you then find another one - I am quite positive there's someone you can just talk to . . . and there's endless online groups, or in person support groups. If you need someone to talk to, message me! I know it's not in person but I am always here.
As a side note, there's a book called Salt, Sugar, Fat. It's an amazing read! They talk about how these three ingredients, which are actually found in the food you can't get away from, mimic drug addictions for you body and brain. And the hardest part is that we can live without drugs, we can't live without food. No one is going to tell you to moderate your heroin intake, right? Food addiction is one of the hardest things. Also, habits are hard to build but once they are in place you won't look back - I promise! I struggle daily, but it's getting easier and easier. The hard days are going to be reallllllly hard, at first. But you will build tools and ways to deal with them, I promise. There's also quite a few good books on habit building and will power that, in my opinion, are worth a gander.
Please feel free to reach out at any time - it's hard to get through this, and sometimes you need a community of your people who have your back.
Best of luck on this journey - it'll always be worth it, I promise.
xo
ETA: in talking to the counsellor she suggested I start journaling and of course I was like look lady . . . I'm not gonna pour out my feelings here and sit for hours just writing and writing. But she said just try it - for like a week - and if it doesn't help, then we will find something else. Well that was like 4 months ago and I journal every day or every other. I just write whatever comes out and it really helped me. So maybe a thought for how to battle the food cravings and what ever other emotions you might have that's causing the struggle.2 -
lucerorojo wrote: »So are you living at home? Who is cooking the meals that you are eating and then afterwards ordering take away? If you don't like what is being served for dinner, can you just skip it? It would be cheaper and easier (and perhaps healthier) to eat the dinner with your family, BUT if you don't like what they are cooking, then eating one meal is better than eating two (the take away afterwards). Can you plan to cook ahead of time for the family and prepare something you really enjoy? So much that you will not need to eat take away later?
I live alone the majority of the time whilst in education. So I cook the meals and then I order the takeaways. Unfortunately I can relay blame onto other parties (and even if other parties were involved, they certainly wouldn't be forcing me to eat... it's all on me).
When I am home, I split the cooking between myself and mum. Can't say I ever really dislike anything we make - the only thing I can say is that it's not takeaway. So it's not fulfilling to me - but that's purely down to cravings currently.
Problem with takeaway food is, it's filling for the moment but later I'm hungry again. Aware this happens with junk food.
I know I need to just kick eating rubbish food otherwise there's no break... I'll keep going how I am.
Planning currently is definitely something I can work on though. Right now for example, I have nothing in the fridge to eat. My options are going to the shop, which I can't be bothered to do or order takeaway. I'm going to go to the shop in a minute, but usually ordering takeaway would win whilst I feel this way.What if every time you had that strong craving, you did some sort of workout or drank a bunch of tea or water? If you went for a short walk and drank a bunch of water every night when tempted to order take out, would it divert your attention and take some energy away from wanting to go get food? Or what if you created a reward system? Instead of spending the 10 on the food, for every night you don't, you put 5 away for a special reward that you want? It would save money plus give you a reward allowance?
I like this idea. I need to save money anyway, would like a holiday next year (also another reason to shed the weight now). So maybe the holiday could be my reward if I was sensible.
Thanks0 -
Thanks for your responses. So what kind of food is it that you are getting take-away? I don't live in UK and have never been there. I'm just trying to get an idea of what you are craving to see if there are some things you could substitute in your own cooking so that you wouldn't crave the take-away. It's easy enough to say go "cold turkey" but often that is too hard, especially with food. At least if you could eat at home you would know what's in it and how many calories are in it. It is almost impossible to know with take-out food what the calories are (unless it's a well known chain like McDonald's.).
For example, I stopped getting chinese take-out here once I prepared a recipe of General Tso's chicken at home. My version TASTED much better, was cheaper than buying it from the restaurant, had less calories, and had NO msg. I knew exactly what was in it and since it tasted even fresher/better it essentially cured my craving for that take-out. If I get chinese food at all now I just get a soup and an appetizer. In most cases what I can cook tastes better than the restaurant food I can afford to eat on a regular basis so there is no incentive to me to get it anymore as long as I have PLANNED and have food available to cook.
Here in the USA the fast food chains and chinese restaurants are notorious for putting MSG and other chemicals in them. I've read that some of these additivies purposely create cravings so that you buy more of their food. I do not know if that's true in the UK.
Have you been logging on MFP (at least estimating) the food you are eating, even the take-away?
When I started a few months ago I was reluctant because I thought that CICO was nonsense. My doctor recommended that I at least write down what I was eating, regardless if I cut back or not. The first day was really an eye-opener. I thought I was eating too much, but didn't know HOW much. I was shocked to see that I had been eating double what I should have been, which is why I gained weight.
You know that you are gaining weight, eating too much--the more details you have about it, the better it is IMO. Then you can start with small changes if you want to go that way. (The other way as has been mentioned to deal with the emotional/psychological issues first).
You are really young so that is in your favor. We can all change if we want to, but the younger you are, the less time you have had for bad habits to set in, and the body is very resilient.1 -
lucerorojo wrote: »Thanks for your responses. So what kind of food is it that you are getting take-away? I don't live in UK and have never been there. I'm just trying to get an idea of what you are craving to see if there are some things you could substitute in your own cooking so that you wouldn't crave the take-away. It's easy enough to say go "cold turkey" but often that is too hard, especially with food. At least if you could eat at home you would know what's in it and how many calories are in it. It is almost impossible to know with take-out food what the calories are (unless it's a well known chain like McDonald's.).
For example, I stopped getting chinese take-out here once I prepared a recipe of General Tso's chicken at home. My version TASTED much better, was cheaper than buying it from the restaurant, had less calories, and had NO msg. I knew exactly what was in it and since it tasted even fresher/better it essentially cured my craving for that take-out. If I get chinese food at all now I just get a soup and an appetizer. In most cases what I can cook tastes better than the restaurant food I can afford to eat on a regular basis so there is no incentive to me to get it anymore as long as I have PLANNED and have food available to cook.
Here in the USA the fast food chains and chinese restaurants are notorious for putting MSG and other chemicals in them. I've read that some of these additivies purposely create cravings so that you buy more of their food. I do not know if that's true in the UK.
Have you been logging on MFP (at least estimating) the food you are eating, even the take-away?
When I started a few months ago I was reluctant because I thought that CICO was nonsense. My doctor recommended that I at least write down what I was eating, regardless if I cut back or not. The first day was really an eye-opener. I thought I was eating too much, but didn't know HOW much. I was shocked to see that I had been eating double what I should have been, which is why I gained weight.
You know that you are gaining weight, eating too much--the more details you have about it, the better it is IMO. Then you can start with small changes if you want to go that way. (The other way as has been mentioned to deal with the emotional/psychological issues first).
You are really young so that is in your favor. We can all change if we want to, but the younger you are, the less time you have had for bad habits to set in, and the body is very resilient.
McDonalds is definitely one, along with KFC (or other fried chicken type places), Pizza Hut/Dominoes Pizza, Subway - it tends to be the well known places I go for. Oddly, I don't actually like burgers or pizza typically. I mean if I bought them from a supermarket, I totally wouldn't fancy them. But takeaway, all is great. A common thing I tell my parents (they're fully aware, I don't lie to them or try hide it) is that even after I have the takeaway, I haven't enjoyed what I've eaten. It's just for some reason, I crave it and until I've fulfilled this obsessive need to have it, it won't go away.
I haven't logged on here, started today. But previously I've never gone forwards with a calorie food diary apart from a generalized food diary for the doctors to see to find out what is making me ill. Nothing really came of that though. But I've just gone shopping for today and tomorrow and will/have logged those and will try continuing to do so even if I 'fail'.
I do see your point, so like with KFC, I could find a way at home to coat and cook my own chicken rather than going to KFC who would deep fry it. Like I said, I do actually enjoy cooking (maybe an odd thing to say considering I'm complaining about takeaway food - motivating myself to cook isn't the issue though). Replacing the foods I 'crave' from a takeaway place with a similar healthy alternative is something I think I could try and do at very least.
I have fears regarding losing weight too. I will admit that the image I have of myself is very lacking currently.. to the point I just cannot look in mirrors and refuse to go clothes shopping as seeing full length mirrors very upsetting. I still think I look the way I did a few years ago, but I know that I don't? (I don't know if that makes sense?). So when I see what I look like now, I just feel repulsed and makes it difficult to live with. I worry a lot about, if I were to lose weight, then would I be happy with the end result after doing so much damage to my body? I know the stretch marks are forever and there's potential for loose skin at this point. Maybe not lots, but enough for me to be disappointed. Again, having said all this, I know that for my health I have to change and avoid getting bigger than I am now. Stretch marks and loose skin is a far better alternative than dying early would be if I continue as I am.
Appreciate your replies too, it is helpful to see how other people tackle(d) their issues or just handle their diets.0 -
I tell myself I can have what I am craving on Friday night (or whatever day in the future). I don't tell myself "no," I tell myself "not right now." By the time Friday rolls around, I usually don't want the thing I was craving any more.3
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I think you are compulsively eating. I think if you began feeling better about yourself you would eat less. In other words, your body image and your relationship with takeaway are linked.4
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I understand how you feel about the mirrors and clothes shopping. I actually think that it is good to imagine yourself as thin and beautiful as a form of visualization. Your subconscious mind will act on it and help with the weight loss. It is not helpful to look in the mirror or go clothes shopping and make yourself feel worse. The fact that you are on here and asking for suggestions/help is already a start and a signal that you have reached the point in which you cannot continue the way you were going. That is a BIG step.
McDonald's is an easy fix. Buy some meat and make a hamburger. The one at home will be so much better--and it is easy and fast. Instead of their fries you can make some potatoes--many different ways to make potatoes. To ease from the McDs french fries, you could cut up on potato--put a tsp of olive oil in bowl, add some spices--oregano, pepper, a bit of salt. Put the potatoes in it and then bake the potatoes (on a pan of course) in the oven. Not low calorie, but at least you know what it is--if this satisfies your craving for McDonalds you'll eat one meal instead of two! If you weigh/measure you will also have a calorie count.
But even if you go to McDonald's, Pizza Hut and Subway you can google the calorie counts online--and put that in MFP. At least you will know how many cals you are eating.1 -
coffee_rocks wrote: »Hello. Everyone struggles with some type of food or activity that is a trigger to eat, and for me, even when I'm not really hungry. For example, after a long day, I enjoy watching a game on TV, but that's a trigger for me to snack. I used to easily put away 500-1,000 calories in snacking after dinner - a few cookies, a piece of cheese with crackers, a cold beer. That's 50% of my daily calories! Crazy!
Your brain is powerful, but it can be retrained. It tells you you need take-away, or salty food, or fatty food. For me, chips and cheese were slowly adding on the pounds. Now, I do this. First, when I'm enjoying a show on TV, and I want a snack, I force myself to first drink a glass of water and eat an apple. You would be amazed how often just doing this makes my craving go away. Second, I keep a pack of sugar free gum next to my chair. I'll pop in a piece of gum and chew for 20 minutes before I think about food. Third, I have some potato chips...but only once in awhile, and a very small serving. I've gone from daily bowls of chips and cookies to the occasional small serving of chips or one cookie. The change is remarkable, but it takes time. It took me over a month - probably almost two - before I really went without craving junk food all the time. Now, I actually enjoy the apple at night, and hardly ever buy the chips.
Me too. Calorie-dense snacks in the house is a definite no for me (that boredom snacking trigger is hard to overcome). And same thing with the water, and apple (slow-ish to consume for the number of calories and helps meet fiber recommendations). Next up for me is the popcorn that I started stocking in the house to reach for before the significant other's junk food stash.
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