I feel like a failure

Take a look at what you are eating now. Obviously it is too much or you wouldn't be gaining weight, right? A food scale is very helpful, but you can get a jump on losing weight by just eating smaller portions of what your currently eat, and cutting some things out all together.

You can do this. My starting weight was 254, but I'm shorter than you and for me, 140 is the top of the 'normal' BMI range. (I'm shooting for 130). I've dropped over 86 lbs in just under a year. What's worked for me has been

1) Medical scare. I got an obesity-related complication (chronic venous insufficiency, i.e. the veins in my legs collapsed from having to carry an extra half-person or so. Also led to my developing lymphedema.) Thankfully, both conditions are currently being managed, but I don't want to back to daily nursing visits to change a dressing on a weeping wound on my leg until it finally healed. Or having to rest the leg and be pushed in a wheelchair.

2) Working in treats and indulgences in an overall healthy diet. I limit homemade desserts to 200 calories/serving and don't buy many bakery treats, but I'll have a small portion of a richer dessert when eating outside the house. I'm usually fine at the dinner table, but leftover rich foods in the fridge aren't good for me to have around.

3) Over time, working in, and increasing exercise. I don't have a gym membership. I've got dumbbells in my basement, a book on strength training and a fitness glider. Not to mention the great outdoors and a love of long walks. I'm not especially well-coordinated. I stink at sports and hate the sort of aerobics classes that were in vogue in the 80s. And until coming to MFP, I'd never even heard of HIIT, crossfit, or tabata. I've heard of them now and respect those who do them, but—and this is despite the conventional 'wisdom' that "if you aren't getting hot and sweaty and feel like you're gonna die, you aren't burning enough calories"—I've been dropping weight with long walks at around 3.0/3.25 mph (2.5 mph when I started), plus the glider if the weather's lousy. I'm working my way up to it, but I'm not lifting anything over 24lbs (2 12-lb dumbbells) at the moment. I'm thinking about getting into lifting heavy, but at home I don't have anyone who can spot me and I don't currently belong to a gym. And I can't lift 40lbs comfortably yet, but that's coming. Hopefully. And I'm still seeing muscles poking through the fat. (It seems I have deltoids. Who knew?)

In my case, there is absolutely nothing 'fancy' or 'extreme' about the way the weight has come off. It's literally been 'eating less and moving more'. I haven't eliminated food groups or macros. I haven't done high intensity exercise (I'm not claiming it isn't good for you, but I'm doing what I enjoy and it's working, so for now lighter exercise is good for me). Nothing magical. But it's working.

Good luck!

You've gotten some great advice here about diet and exercise so I won't repeat what's already been said very well. However, I think that these may just be symptoms of an underlying problem. You've very young to be so overweight which strongly suggests there's some kind of emotional issue going on that you've been using food to "medicate" so to speak. I could be totally off base. Maybe you just really love food a lot and can't stop eating it. But in either case, go see a campus counselor and dig into what's prompting your overeating. Pretty much every college campus has qualified professionals available you can work with and it's usually free to students.

My heart goes out to you. I sincerely hope you get the help you need. Please keep us posted for anything we can do to help you along the way.

champion818 wrote: »

I am also a full time college student so it’s like I only have 7 hours left in the day after school and that’s to sleep time is really crunched with me . I’m not making excuses .... I see what u are saying though

Oh I understand. In college, I worked 3-5 part time jobs at all times. I slept every third day, usually in my car because I was too tired to drive home. I worked tons of night shifts in every nursing home, gas station and fast food place within 60 miles of school. College sucked.

Then I graduated. Got a real job. Had a kid. Know what? Time never increased. There were still never enough hours in the day. All those years I told myself I would work on my weight when I got time - I never got time. Life is always going to be busy.

Everyone here has a story about not having the time - kids, jobs, family issues. Personally, I work 60 hours a week, spend 2 hours per day driving, take care of my mom who had a stroke for several hours a day and most of the weekends, and am working on some severe house projects. Laundry, groceries, bank/post office, etc. No one ever has enough time.

Thats the issue... you let taking care of yourself be a lower priority than other things. So when there is something else that needs done, it always wins. I understand that some things HAVE to be done. Its not like homework is optional, work is optional etc.

So that leaves you with two choices. Put off taking care of yourself until you find that magical "time" that will likely never show up regardless of where you are in life, or.... FIND/MAKE/INVENT time. Work it into the life you have. You see suggestions above about doing squats every time you go to the bathroom, leg stretches while brushing your teeth, park your car slightly farther than you usually do, etc. If fast food is the biggest obstacle - make it work for you! Find other options at the same places you already seem to find time to go to. If you go through taco bell every day and get 2 supreme nachos and a burrito, it takes absolutely NO extra time to order 1 nacho and a burrito without cheese. Those are things you can do. If you drink full sugar soda, start trying to find a diet soda you can get used to. Or water, or water flavoring. Those things do not take time, they do cut calories.

Thats what everyone is trying to say here... I swear the next time someone says to me "You just have to make the time" I want to cram their teeth down their throat - let them live a day in my life and tell me which hour is "frivolous" and I can change? But what they mean is that you have to make your other goals fit into the time and life you already have. Its doable, but you have to put some thought and a little effort. Start with small changes. You can do this.