I need help. I need people with healthy relationships w/ food to respond.

Feel free to add me. I am currently losing one pound per week at 1,200 calories a day. I eat carbs every day. Potatoes, pasta, rice, etc. are part of my daily diet, along with vegetables, fresh fruits and non-meat protein (I don't eat meat). Carbs are not the enemy, eating too many calories is what causes us to gain or not be able to lose weight. You also, however, have to be forgiving with yourself and not feel like a bad person because you eat a so-called "bad food". I had friends over last night for a party and was so busy preparing, I only had time for a very small lunch. At the party, I ate chocolate, cake, fried rice and macaroni, but I did so in small portions and the scale this morning was the same as it was yesterday. I find that if I restrict certain foods completely, then I begin to crave them and then when I finally give in, I completely gorge myself and then feel guilty about it the next day. If you want ice cream, eat ice cream, just log it and adjust your other meals to compensate, add in a little exercise and stay within your daily calorie count. It's your plan, your body and your food. Hang in there.

Although different circumstances, I can relate as I have a history of clinical anorexia as well as intermittent issues with bulimia. In fact, I have fought the mental battles on and off for close to thirty years now. I have had periods where I have been fine and have been close to what one would term 'normal' but then a stressor will fling me right back into obsessing over my weight, food, clothing size and exercise amounts. I was doing great back in 2013/2014, focused on fitness and strength to a point I did not even weigh myself, but have slipped backwards this year and am now at the very bottom of BMI for my height.

The only positive is that I am a very routined person and part of my routine is ensuring I get my protein, my fats, healthy carbs and that I eat a reasonable amount, ie, at least 1800 calories, often over 2000. Maybe if you could somehow swing your focus around to fitness, strength and food as fuel, it might help. Research can help in this area, it did for me. I never did and never would venture into keto as for some, carbs can be necessary for mental health if they already struggle with depression etc. Feel free to add me. I could sure use some support myself.

Raw broccoli, cauliflower, carrots with Sabra Red Pepper hummus. It's not a lot of carbs, but (1) is low calorie, (2) is filling, (3) and while low in carbs...that's all it is (no fat or protein to speak of). I have gluten problems, and have to be careful where I get my carbs from anyways. A banana and Quaker apple cinnamon rice cake is also a good choice for carbs with low calories, and is pretty tasty IMHO.

Read about the Minnesota Starvation Experiment. It should be an eye-opener.

The short version is that restrictive eating (in an environment where food is available) leads to the kind of behaviour we know as eating disorders. And that these become self-perpetuating. That's what you're up against.
But it also means that your problem is not what you are, nor a monolithic disease, but that it's the behaviour patterns underlying that disease. And those can be changed - only, it often needs many attempts, different approaches and practice to do so. In my opinion, that's the main thing a councellor does; s/he supports you and helps you pick yourself up when another attempt seems to have failed (but is, in fast, a new experience, something you have learnt from.)

I know that wall in one's head. Used to have it mainly with fat, though. Either way, I'm sure you understand the rational approach or are capable of reading up on it. I assume the problem is not *what* you are supposed to do, but *how* to try doing it?

Ketogenic diets and extreme calorie reduction don't work together, because out body just can't make up its own nutrients out of thin air to function in ketosis. If you're anorectic, it's probably harder to stop restricting too much than to stop the ketosis, so I agree with upping the carb intake as your first step. Make sure to take some multivitamin/mineral supplement if you aren't already taking one because, well. It's useless to healthy people, but if you're not healthy, it's a way of giving you more time and energy to become healthy.

And - you know, anything goes. It really depends on when you eat, what you eat, how you eat it.Whether you can add new, better rules until you stop hurting yourself, or whether any change makes the whole thing break down and get worse.
Veggies is one option. Solid ones would be really, really hard for me in that situation, tbh.
Drinking the carbs may work, because liquids are easier to swallow when you're super anxious. So, soups with puréed veggies. Green smoothies. The great thing with these is that you can control calorie/nutrient density.
If necessary, work your way up to normal serving sizes, to including a bit of potato in a soup or fruit in a smoothie. And try to eat solid carbs whenever you feel up to it.

Also, upping your carbs when you're still under maintenance intake will not make you gain real weight. It might however make your weight fluctuate a bit until it gets used to what you're eating. If you have a problem with the scale, it helps to average your weight over a week, even over a month when you have your menses, to get reliable readings on real change.