Need some help to fix an unhealthy mindset
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I have frozen dinners on the rare occasion but really don't like the taste of them much. If they work for you and keep you in a calorie deficit then that is different. Just be mindful that most a very high in sodium which can cause fluid retention and mask weight loss.
I remember the days of catering for an allergic child. Thank God she has grown out of her milk allergy and I now only have to worry about peanuts. One thing you can do to avoid frozen meals and not having to cook too much is to double recipes and freeze half. This can be special meals for yourself, your fussy toddler, or your child with allergies. A bit of work to begin with but it saves a lot of time once you have multiple meals in the freezer. Just having meals with your standard meat and veg works well too. For a while I was dealing with a vegetarian. Pasta worked well. I'd cook the mince in one saucepan, a vege sauce in the other and then just combine the 2, leaving a serving of the sauce behind for the vegetarian. You would just have to be mindful that a serving of pasta is actually quite small meaning you should have a bowl which has a lot more sauce than pasta. There are other meals I adapt which means slight changes caters for all.2 -
When I find myself getting a bit too obsessive for my norm I set my calories to maintenance, then try to eat reasonable. No restrictions, just eating without overeating and making sensible choices. Whatever calories that ends up bringing me at the end of the day it's all well and good as long as I'm not above maintenance. I don't try to hit a certain restricted calorie goal, I just try not to go over maintenance. This results in a comfortable deficit on most days ranging between 1 and 800 calories but I find myself averaging a deficit of about 300 without excessive effort put into it. The loss may not be predictable, but would be focusing and working on your eating habits instead of focusing on exact calories and facing your irrational foods fears without having to worry about calories too. I'm not sure how well this would work for you as I already have a certain understanding of my eating habits and what is sensible and what is not (I don't restrict much when I diet so the way I eat while dieting is not very different from how I eat in maintenance), but it's worth a try. Even if it doesn't produce any loss at first, at least you will learn more about yourself and your habits and see in what minor ways you could change your diet without making radical and stressful changes that would backfire - away from the restriction and diet mentality and closer to how you see yourself living after you've lost the weight. Like training wheels for maintenance, if you will.5
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Lillymoo01 wrote: »I have frozen dinners on the rare occasion but really don't like the taste of them much. If they work for you and keep you in a calorie deficit then that is different. Just be mindful that most a very high in sodium which can cause fluid retention and mask weight loss.
I remember the days of catering for an allergic child. Thank God she has grown out of her milk allergy and I now only have to worry about peanuts. One thing you can do to avoid frozen meals and not having to cook too much is to double recipes and freeze half. This can be special meals for yourself, your fussy toddler, or your child with allergies. A bit of work to begin with but it saves a lot of time once you have multiple meals in the freezer. Just having meals with your standard meat and veg works well too. For a while I was dealing with a vegetarian. Pasta worked well. I'd cook the mince in one saucepan, a vege sauce in the other and then just combine the 2, leaving a serving of the sauce behind for the vegetarian. You would just have to be mindful that a serving of pasta is actually quite small meaning you should have a bowl which has a lot more sauce than pasta. There are other meals I adapt which means slight changes caters for all.
Wow Lillymoo, my daughter has the milk and peanut allergy as well as egg whites. Its comforting to know others are in the same boat, but I sure am glad your daughter has outgrown the dairy one. Fingers crossed for my daughter too.
To be totally honest, I am having uneasy feelings about dinner in general, that is why I am gravitating to a ready made meal. I can eat healthy and know exact cals for breakfast, lunch and snacks, I can control it somewhat. I have no idea what is healthy anymore and the things I cook for dinner for the kids are carb rich, things I have tried to steer away from.
I still can't get the fear out of my head about eating a bowl of bolognaise for example, crazy I know. There is this irrational fear that I won't lose weight eating what the family eats for dinner. Sigh.......0 -
teags84mfp wrote: »Lillymoo01 wrote: »I have frozen dinners on the rare occasion but really don't like the taste of them much. If they work for you and keep you in a calorie deficit then that is different. Just be mindful that most a very high in sodium which can cause fluid retention and mask weight loss.
I remember the days of catering for an allergic child. Thank God she has grown out of her milk allergy and I now only have to worry about peanuts. One thing you can do to avoid frozen meals and not having to cook too much is to double recipes and freeze half. This can be special meals for yourself, your fussy toddler, or your child with allergies. A bit of work to begin with but it saves a lot of time once you have multiple meals in the freezer. Just having meals with your standard meat and veg works well too. For a while I was dealing with a vegetarian. Pasta worked well. I'd cook the mince in one saucepan, a vege sauce in the other and then just combine the 2, leaving a serving of the sauce behind for the vegetarian. You would just have to be mindful that a serving of pasta is actually quite small meaning you should have a bowl which has a lot more sauce than pasta. There are other meals I adapt which means slight changes caters for all.
Wow Lillymoo, my daughter has the milk and peanut allergy as well as egg whites. Its comforting to know others are in the same boat, but I sure am glad your daughter has outgrown the dairy one. Fingers crossed for my daughter too.
To be totally honest, I am having uneasy feelings about dinner in general, that is why I am gravitating to a ready made meal. I can eat healthy and know exact cals for breakfast, lunch and snacks, I can control it somewhat. I have no idea what is healthy anymore and the things I cook for dinner for the kids are carb rich, things I have tried to steer away from.
I still can't get the fear out of my head about eating a bowl of bolognaise for example, crazy I know. There is this irrational fear that I won't lose weight eating what the family eats for dinner. Sigh.......
I had that mindset with bolognaise as well. Too much fear put into us about carbs, which are actually not evil. These days I have more vegetable in the sauce than I do meat and the servings of pasta are much smaller. I use the recipe builder for accurate measurements of calories. Add each ingredient then once cooked (in this case minus the pasta) I weigh the pot (I have a word document now with all pot weights), the pot and the food then deduct the two. I divide that number by 100 and have each serve at 100 grams. Pasta would then be added separating. Added bonus is all my favourite recipes are now here so I don't have to search recipe books and the internet all the time for them.4 -
amusedmonkey wrote: »When I find myself getting a bit too obsessive for my norm I set my calories to maintenance, then try to eat reasonable. No restrictions, just eating without overeating and making sensible choices. Whatever calories that ends up bringing me at the end of the day it's all well and good as long as I'm not above maintenance. I don't try to hit a certain restricted calorie goal, I just try not to go over maintenance. This results in a comfortable deficit on most days ranging between 1 and 800 calories but I find myself averaging a deficit of about 300 without excessive effort put into it. The loss may not be predictable, but would be focusing and working on your eating habits instead of focusing on exact calories. I'm not sure how well this would work for you as I already have a certain understanding of my eating habits and what is sensible and what is not (I don't restrict much when I diet so the way I eat while dieting is not very different from how I eat in maintenance), but it's worth a try. Even if it doesn't produce any loss at first, at least you will learn more about yourself and your habits and see in what minor ways you could change your diet without making radical and stressful changes that would backfire - away from the restriction and diet mentality and closer to how you see yourself living after you've lost the weight. Like training wheels for maintenance, if you will.
Fantastic and insightful advice thank you. Yes when I do "diet" I go very hard at it indeed. That is why i have never maintained my weight, I just deprive myself way too much when losing and dont think of what will happen when I reach my goal. In fact I have never really eaten normally or intuitively since hitting puberty. I will take your advice on board and aim for small sustainable changes!3 -
I think that you eat because you like food, and you have been thinking that food is the enemy. This creates an inner conflict, and you eat when you can't handle the pressure anymore, and overeat because you feel that you gave in and lost control. We can do a lot of hard and painful and even dangerous things for a while, but sooner or later, that has to stop. I also think that your perception of being and looking healthy and eating well, may be a bit skewed - if you lost weight by starving yourself, you weren't healthy, you were just thin, and if you end up gorging, the diet you are aiming for, can't be good for you. You can't rely on willpower for such a basic need as eating.teags84mfp wrote: »I feel like I have no control around food anymore. I had so much willpower last year and now its gone. I want to be healthier and within a healthy BMI. I can go 1 week eating really well, then gorge on food. I don't feel sad or bored really, I have no idea why I am eating like this. I feel really lost and want to heal from this. I feel incredibly ashamed when people see me now, having seen me looking so thin and healthy, to now. Its very embarrasing as it means people can see I have no control.
The reason you don't feel satisfied by a small amount, may be that you think that you shouldn't even eat any of it in the first place. This will lead to building up a great, but unrealistic expectation, and not paying attention when you do eat it, and eating more to try to get the pleasure you were expecting, and working hard to forget it afterwards. If you allow yourself to enjoy the treat, for real, not just let yourself eat it because you can't resist anymore, the experience will be totally different. This takes time and practice. When it comes to the foods you have trouble resisting now, it can be a good idea to abstain totally for a while, but only if you're clear that this is only temporarily. If you as much as try to tell yourself you'll never have them again, you're going to intensify the cravings.For me, I cannot figure out if having small treats within calorie allowance is the best way, or simply abstaining from them all together. I have never felt satisfied eating a small chocolate, it just gives me a taste and desire for more.
This tells me that you haven't just cut out treats, you have undereaten. You have to nourish yourself, sufficiently, regularly and reliably, or else that rebound hunger will bite you in the behind.For me, losing weight and hunger has always come hand in hand.
Yes. That is a completely normal reaction. Just having this understanding, means that you are on your way to solving the problem.Trying to restrict treats and carbs completely has created huge cravings.
You haven't come up with this idea by yourself, this is indoctrination from the diet industry. Most of us have fallen for it. If we weren't so scared and impatient, we would be able to see how normal weight people eat and move, and trust that we are able to do the same and have the same results. Instead, we're led on a wild hunt for our own tails.I still can't get the fear out of my head about eating a bowl of bolognaise for example, crazy I know. There is this irrational fear that I won't lose weight eating what the family eats for dinner. Sigh.......9 -
OP-I want to complement you on coming back with an open mindset. You'll be fine, just wait and see. It takes awhile to find that "sweet spot" where you're losing, but still have energy and are satisfied. It does exist, just try some of the suggestions given until you find it. I wish you all the best.2
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snowflake954 wrote: »OP-I want to complement you on coming back with an open mindset. You'll be fine, just wait and see. It takes awhile to find that "sweet spot" where you're losing, but still have energy and are satisfied. It does exist, just try some of the suggestions given until you find it. I wish you all the best.
Thank you snowflake, you are so kind. Thank you everyone for all the love and support. So nice to have people cheering me on!1 -
kommodevaran wrote: »
I think that you eat because you like food, and you have been thinking that food is the enemy. This creates an inner conflict, and you eat when you can't handle the pressure anymore, and overeat because you feel that you gave in and lost control. We can do a lot of hard and painful and even dangerous things for a while, but sooner or later, that has to stop. I also think that your perception of being and looking healthy and eating well, may be a bit skewed - if you lost weight by starving yourself, you weren't healthy, you were just thin, and if you end up gorging, the diet you are aiming for, can't be good for you. You can't rely on willpower for such a basic need as eating.teags84mfp wrote: »I feel like I have no control around food anymore. I had so much willpower last year and now its gone. I want to be healthier and within a healthy BMI. I can go 1 week eating really well, then gorge on food. I don't feel sad or bored really, I have no idea why I am eating like this. I feel really lost and want to heal from this. I feel incredibly ashamed when people see me now, having seen me looking so thin and healthy, to now. Its very embarrasing as it means people can see I have no control.
The reason you don't feel satisfied by a small amount, may be that you think that you shouldn't even eat any of it in the first place. This will lead to building up a great, but unrealistic expectation, and not paying attention when you do eat it, and eating more to try to get the pleasure you were expecting, and working hard to forget it afterwards. If you allow yourself to enjoy the treat, for real, not just let yourself eat it because you can't resist anymore, the experience will be totally different. This takes time and practice. When it comes to the foods you have trouble resisting now, it can be a good idea to abstain totally for a while, but only if you're clear that this is only temporarily. If you as much as try to tell yourself you'll never have them again, you're going to intensify the cravings.For me, I cannot figure out if having small treats within calorie allowance is the best way, or simply abstaining from them all together. I have never felt satisfied eating a small chocolate, it just gives me a taste and desire for more.
This tells me that you haven't just cut out treats, you have undereaten. You have to nourish yourself, sufficiently, regularly and reliably, or else that rebound hunger will bite you in the behind.For me, losing weight and hunger has always come hand in hand.
Yes. That is a completely normal reaction. Just having this understanding, means that you are on your way to solving the problem.Trying to restrict treats and carbs completely has created huge cravings.
You haven't come up with this idea by yourself, this is indoctrination from the diet industry. Most of us have fallen for it. If we weren't so scared and impatient, we would be able to see how normal weight people eat and move, and trust that we are able to do the same and have the same results. Instead, we're led on a wild hunt for our own tails.I still can't get the fear out of my head about eating a bowl of bolognaise for example, crazy I know. There is this irrational fear that I won't lose weight eating what the family eats for dinner. Sigh.......
Oh my. Wow. I have read your post 5 times. It's like you know whats going on inside my brain. I can't thank you enough for breaking all of this down for me to see it clearly for what it is. What you wrote resonated so strongly with me that I am on the brink of tears.
Yes, that was so well spoken and true when you mentioned my perception of what healthy looks like. Getting to a healthy weight in an unhealthy manner was so so bad. I was literally starving. And I knew it. Seeing my beautiful thick hair in clumps falling out in the sink was devastating for me. Seeing a pale complexion and dark circles under eyes from lack of sleep because I was so hungry was unhealthy. It was far more dangerous than I realised, and I was damaging my body.
And gosh yes, I look at people around me that are of a normal healthy weight, happy around food, exercise for the joy of it, I look at them and try to envison myself like that. A relaxed attitude around food and enjoying from all food groups is the way forward for me. Thank you again for your insight, it has made me really look deep within myself and excited about making changes towards better health.
It is night time here in Australia, however starting tomorrow morning, I am going to have a bowl of porridge with milk and a banana because I love oats, and I no longer need to fear carbs. This is truly freeing. xxx11 -
Regarding the bolognaise...I am the same height as you, 15 years older, and less active by the sounds of it. I am losing a pound a week on average eating spag bol and lasagne regularly. I like to add lots of vegies to mine, plus kidney or canellini beans. I used to grate the vegies but now my kids are teenagers they don't care if they have chunks of vegies in there.
I've lost 8kg so far (18 pounds I think) & I have starchy carbs with pretty much every meal.
It's interesting that carbs are now demonized. For my generation, fat was the baddie. I still have a bit of that "all fats are bad" thinking pop into my mind sometimes.
ETA: Just read your last post. You are a fellow Aussie...I don't need to talk in pounds for you lol! And yes, time for sleep. 2 -
JoLightensUp wrote: »Regarding the bolognaise...I am the same height as you, 15 years older, and less active by the sounds of it. I am losing a pound a week on average eating spag bol and lasagne regularly. I like to add lots of vegies to mine, plus kidney or canellini beans. I used to grate the vegies but now my kids are teenagers they don't care if they have chunks of vegies in there.
I've lost 8kg so far (18 pounds I think) & I have starchy carbs with pretty much every meal.
It's interesting that carbs are now demonized. For my generation, fat was the baddie. I still have a bit of that "all fats are bad" thinking pop into my mind sometimes.
ETA: Just read your last post. You are a fellow Aussie...I don't need to talk in pounds for you lol! And yes, time for sleep.
Haha yes Jo, G'day mate! Lovely, a fellow Aussie yay! Yes we can speak in kgs and centimetres lol. I just put my stats in pounds to be courteous to our American friends on here0 -
I'm Norwegian, so I use kilos and centimetres. Just don't talk to me about kilojoulesteags84mfp wrote: »JoLightensUp wrote: »Regarding the bolognaise...I am the same height as you, 15 years older, and less active by the sounds of it. I am losing a pound a week on average eating spag bol and lasagne regularly. I like to add lots of vegies to mine, plus kidney or canellini beans. I used to grate the vegies but now my kids are teenagers they don't care if they have chunks of vegies in there.
I've lost 8kg so far (18 pounds I think) & I have starchy carbs with pretty much every meal.
It's interesting that carbs are now demonized. For my generation, fat was the baddie. I still have a bit of that "all fats are bad" thinking pop into my mind sometimes.
ETA: Just read your last post. You are a fellow Aussie...I don't need to talk in pounds for you lol! And yes, time for sleep.
Haha yes Jo, G'day mate! Lovely, a fellow Aussie yay! Yes we can speak in kgs and centimetres lol. I just put my stats in pounds to be courteous to our American friends on here
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kommodevaran wrote: »
I'm Norwegian, so I use kilos and centimetres. Just don't talk to me about kilojoulesteags84mfp wrote: »JoLightensUp wrote: »Regarding the bolognaise...I am the same height as you, 15 years older, and less active by the sounds of it. I am losing a pound a week on average eating spag bol and lasagne regularly. I like to add lots of vegies to mine, plus kidney or canellini beans. I used to grate the vegies but now my kids are teenagers they don't care if they have chunks of vegies in there.
I've lost 8kg so far (18 pounds I think) & I have starchy carbs with pretty much every meal.
It's interesting that carbs are now demonized. For my generation, fat was the baddie. I still have a bit of that "all fats are bad" thinking pop into my mind sometimes.
ETA: Just read your last post. You are a fellow Aussie...I don't need to talk in pounds for you lol! And yes, time for sleep.
Haha yes Jo, G'day mate! Lovely, a fellow Aussie yay! Yes we can speak in kgs and centimetres lol. I just put my stats in pounds to be courteous to our American friends on here
Haha good to know thank you! You have been very kind and helpful to me. I would love to visit your country one day!1 -
teags84mfp wrote: »It is night time here in Australia, however starting tomorrow morning, I am going to have a bowl of porridge with milk and a banana because I love oats, and I no longer need to fear carbs. This is truly freeing. xxx
this part is very satisfying to read. reminded me of one of those exorcism movies lol. good job OP.
Indian here, and same.kommodevaran wrote: »
I'm Norwegian, so I use kilos and centimetres. Just don't talk to me about kilojoulesteags84mfp wrote: »JoLightensUp wrote: »Regarding the bolognaise...I am the same height as you, 15 years older, and less active by the sounds of it. I am losing a pound a week on average eating spag bol and lasagne regularly. I like to add lots of vegies to mine, plus kidney or canellini beans. I used to grate the vegies but now my kids are teenagers they don't care if they have chunks of vegies in there.
I've lost 8kg so far (18 pounds I think) & I have starchy carbs with pretty much every meal.
It's interesting that carbs are now demonized. For my generation, fat was the baddie. I still have a bit of that "all fats are bad" thinking pop into my mind sometimes.
ETA: Just read your last post. You are a fellow Aussie...I don't need to talk in pounds for you lol! And yes, time for sleep.
Haha yes Jo, G'day mate! Lovely, a fellow Aussie yay! Yes we can speak in kgs and centimetres lol. I just put my stats in pounds to be courteous to our American friends on here
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This is the coolest thread I have read on here in a while. Thanks for posting. There are so many people in your same position that can draw inspiration from all that's been written here.
Please pop back in and keep us posted on how things are going.2 -
teags84mfp wrote: »kommodevaran wrote: »
I think that you eat because you like food, and you have been thinking that food is the enemy. This creates an inner conflict, and you eat when you can't handle the pressure anymore, and overeat because you feel that you gave in and lost control. We can do a lot of hard and painful and even dangerous things for a while, but sooner or later, that has to stop. I also think that your perception of being and looking healthy and eating well, may be a bit skewed - if you lost weight by starving yourself, you weren't healthy, you were just thin, and if you end up gorging, the diet you are aiming for, can't be good for you. You can't rely on willpower for such a basic need as eating.teags84mfp wrote: »I feel like I have no control around food anymore. I had so much willpower last year and now its gone. I want to be healthier and within a healthy BMI. I can go 1 week eating really well, then gorge on food. I don't feel sad or bored really, I have no idea why I am eating like this. I feel really lost and want to heal from this. I feel incredibly ashamed when people see me now, having seen me looking so thin and healthy, to now. Its very embarrasing as it means people can see I have no control.
The reason you don't feel satisfied by a small amount, may be that you think that you shouldn't even eat any of it in the first place. This will lead to building up a great, but unrealistic expectation, and not paying attention when you do eat it, and eating more to try to get the pleasure you were expecting, and working hard to forget it afterwards. If you allow yourself to enjoy the treat, for real, not just let yourself eat it because you can't resist anymore, the experience will be totally different. This takes time and practice. When it comes to the foods you have trouble resisting now, it can be a good idea to abstain totally for a while, but only if you're clear that this is only temporarily. If you as much as try to tell yourself you'll never have them again, you're going to intensify the cravings.For me, I cannot figure out if having small treats within calorie allowance is the best way, or simply abstaining from them all together. I have never felt satisfied eating a small chocolate, it just gives me a taste and desire for more.
This tells me that you haven't just cut out treats, you have undereaten. You have to nourish yourself, sufficiently, regularly and reliably, or else that rebound hunger will bite you in the behind.For me, losing weight and hunger has always come hand in hand.
Yes. That is a completely normal reaction. Just having this understanding, means that you are on your way to solving the problem.Trying to restrict treats and carbs completely has created huge cravings.
You haven't come up with this idea by yourself, this is indoctrination from the diet industry. Most of us have fallen for it. If we weren't so scared and impatient, we would be able to see how normal weight people eat and move, and trust that we are able to do the same and have the same results. Instead, we're led on a wild hunt for our own tails.I still can't get the fear out of my head about eating a bowl of bolognaise for example, crazy I know. There is this irrational fear that I won't lose weight eating what the family eats for dinner. Sigh.......
Oh my. Wow. I have read your post 5 times. It's like you know whats going on inside my brain. I can't thank you enough for breaking all of this down for me to see it clearly for what it is. What you wrote resonated so strongly with me that I am on the brink of tears.
Yes, that was so well spoken and true when you mentioned my perception of what healthy looks like. Getting to a healthy weight in an unhealthy manner was so so bad. I was literally starving. And I knew it. Seeing my beautiful thick hair in clumps falling out in the sink was devastating for me. Seeing a pale complexion and dark circles under eyes from lack of sleep because I was so hungry was unhealthy. It was far more dangerous than I realised, and I was damaging my body.
And gosh yes, I look at people around me that are of a normal healthy weight, happy around food, exercise for the joy of it, I look at them and try to envison myself like that. A relaxed attitude around food and enjoying from all food groups is the way forward for me. Thank you again for your insight, it has made me really look deep within myself and excited about making changes towards better health.
It is night time here in Australia, however starting tomorrow morning, I am going to have a bowl of porridge with milk and a banana because I love oats, and I no longer need to fear carbs. This is truly freeing. xxx
I agree. Her posts are great and insightful. I enjoy reading them.0 -
teags84mfp wrote: »rheddmobile wrote: »Re: carbs and sweets. I'm a diabetic so I do have to watch how many carbs I have per meal, although I eat a moderate carb diet, not low carb. I started my diet a year ago after my diagnosis with a serious Coca Cola habit and a complete inability to moderate sweet stuff.
As far as having small treats goes, everyone is different but what worked for me was going cold turkey on added sugar for a while. I substituted fruit with yogurt and dark chocolate for my treats. It took about two weeks, but after two weeks my cravings for super sweet things subsided and fruit started to taste much sweeter to me. After almost a year of avoiding sweet things, I've been testing the waters recently - I ate a mini Snickers bar from our supply of Halloween candy a few times this week instead of my usual piece of dark chocolate - and just one 42 calorie bar was fine, I didn't want more. Some foods are just going to be off limits to me forever - I already know myself enough to know that Coke is never going to be a thing I can feel satisfied with small amounts, it's just not worth it to me, and I hate diet drinks, so I drink tea now.
As I said, everyone is different, but I think the best thing is to figure out a way of eating which will keep you from feeling deprived, whether that means a small amount of the same treats, or a larger amount of lower calorie versions. For me, one piece of really good quality dark chocolate was a good substitute for eating a giant bar of cheaper chocolate. Instead of candy while I worked on the computer I started drinking herbal tea.
Well done for kicking your Coke addiction, that is something to be very proud of. Yes I agree, I am going to have to find a way of eating that satisfies me while losing weight as well as maintaining it. It's figuring out what that type of diet looks like that is tricky for me, but I am sure I will figure it out. This is a real lightbulb moment for me thats for sure.
And yeah, it will be different for me losing at a slower rate, I am used to seeing the weight drop off quickly, 2lbs a week. But it came back on just as fast unfortunately. I will just be patient and consistent and follow all the sound advice given here.
Just a thought about a slow loss rate: It can be a good on-ramp to successful weight maintenance.
Overall, I thought of the weight loss process as a time to experiment and learn what way of eating (which foods, what timing) gave me the best balance of tastiness, satiation, nutrition, convenience, and overall happiness.
I tried not to make any changes I was unwilling to make a permanent part of my life . . . other than a reasonable, manageable calorie deficit. This included, while losing, taking an occasional planned day to eat at or even above maintenance calories if it was a true special occasion, like Christmas or my birthday. I was not going to give up all celebratory eating forever, so I needed to learn how to make that work, too.
If you have 37 pounds to goal, you're certainly in a range where 1 pound a week is a good choice, and will soon be reaching a weight where half a pound is the healthier choice. The less you weigh, the slower you should lose, for best assurance of continued good strength, energy, and health.
Besides that "safety margin" thinking, I found three other big advantages in tapering my loss rate as I approached maintenance weight:
First, there was never a point where there was a major hurdle to leap into a dramatically different routine - just a gradual on-ramp to maintenance. Evolution, not revolution.
Second, gradually adding calories helped me to pin down my maintenance calories experimentally. At a few pounds to goal, I started adding daily calories every week or two, perhaps 100 or so at a time, then monitoring my weight long enough to see (amongst water weight fluctuations) whether I was truly still losing, holding steady, or gaining slowly. With each successive add, it took a little longer to see the result. Finally, it was time to set a maintenance body weight range (wide enough to encompass routine daily fluctuations without dramatics) and strive to stay within it long term.
Third, by gradually making small changes to increase calories, it was easiest to do it with small tweaks, like adding some flax seeds to my oatmeal, switching from a lowfat to full-fat dairy product, eating a bit more avocado or cheese, or sometimes adding a small glass of wine.
If, at maintenance, I'd tried to jump straight from a pound a week loss to maintenance calories, I would've been much more likely to add some single big so-called treat every day. There's nothing wrong with big treats . . . but for me, the accumulated smaller tweaks are in practice more satisfying day-to-day than one calorie bomb, and better help me meet my health goals. (YMMV on that one.
).
So, summing up, slower loss rate can be not only a more sustainable way to lose, it can also be an easier way to transition to maintenance.
Best wishes for much success: This time really can be the charm!7 -
ladyhusker39 wrote: »This is the coolest thread I have read on here in a while. Thanks for posting. There are so many people in your same position that can draw inspiration from all that's been written here.
Please pop back in and keep us posted on how things are going.
Thank you, I am glad you have enjoyed reading. And like you say, hopefully it can help people in a similar situation.
I have pre logged all of todays food. All of the macros are spot on, protein went over a little. Carbs are at 160gms. I am going to take a deep breath and trust the process 5 -
Calorie counting has helped me trust the process. I used to just wing it and go by the scales. If the scales didn't drop for a few days, I would think I was eating too much and eat even less! I realise now that was a really bad strategy.
Calorie counting has helped me to be patient, not change anything, and wait for the number on the scales to drop. I weigh daily and use the Libra app to track the trend.
The other thing that has helped me has been thinking of a calorie "range" rather than a single number. When I first started calorie counting, I thought I had failed if I didn't get down to my calorie goal. Now I just try to get net calories somewhere between my goal and maintenance calories. If I am hungrier one day I eat more. Other days I am lower and closer to the goal that MFP set.
And a few days, I have been way over even maintenance, like when I went to Pancake Parlour last week. I guesstimated that I ate over 2000 cals that day. I am still losing.
5 -
Yes Jo that is exactly what I was doing last year during my weight loss. If I didn't see the scales go down in number each day, I thought I must have to eat less- which I did. And then I took it way too far to the point of severely undereating.
I will try not to panic if the scales don't reflect my hard work straight away. This will test my patience, but it is a comforting feeling knowing that this is simple science, the kgs will come off if I just stay at a deficit.
Love your idea of a calorie range, I think that is a very wise idea. And good on you for still going out and enjoying life and special occasions whilst still losing, you're amazing!
So far so good for me today. Feeling full and not thinking about food so much 5
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