Nervous about pregnancy/the baby belly

I completely understand, I'm trying now and worry...

girlalmighty08 wrote: »

I know it seems really superficial, but I'm planning a pregnancy in 2018 (my first) and I've been having a lot of stress lately about what my baby bump will look like. I've been up and down with my weight for years and struggle a bit with self-image. I know that weight gain with pregnancy is inevitable, but the mental battle that's going to come with seeing the scale go up again is kind of stressing me out. Furthermore, I'm also nervous about what it will look like... I'm worried I'm just going to look overweight and not have that nice little bump you see so often.

I know that the only thing that really matters is that my baby is healthy, but I can't help but think about this little detail. Anyone else have the same worry?

Beyond not going crazy and gaining ridiculous amounts of weight, there is very little you can do to control how you carry your baby or where/when/how you show. I'd urge you to discuss your concerns about weight gain with your doctor prior to becoming pregnant, or shortly thereafter. Some weight gain is necessary and healthy for the vast majority of women (particularly if you are at or near a healthy weight before becoming pregnant.)

I'll be honest - I looked fat through probably the middle of my second trimester, and never popped out with a nice lil basketball belly. My babies were still pretty cute though!

Pregnancy and motherhood is a wild ride. Do your best to relax and not stress over the things you can't change, because you will have plenty else to worry about.

Maybe I'm a weirdo, but as I gained weight during my pregnancy I really just enjoyed looking at my stomach and I was amazed that my body could expand to accommodate a human being in there. Nobody ever accosted me to accuse me of looking ugly or fat. A friend loaned me her cute maternity wear and despite the discomfort toward that last month, I kind of reveled in the body transformation. Embrace it.

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I definitely ate for two with my first pregnancy and gained 60 pounds! Everyone said I was having a big baby and guess what? She was only 7'7"! So....talk with your doctor. They can explain what a healthy calorie increase should be. I gained 38 with my second, and she was 8'5"!

While obviously you can control weight gain during pregnancy, sometimes I think he body is going to do what it is going to do. With my first baby, I ate healthily, but did little exercise aside from walking and a prenatal yoga class. I'd previously suffered a miscarriage and was extra cautious about physical exertion. My second pregnancy, I had a number of food aversions, and was busy chasing a toddler around. Third time out, I was much more active, aside from caring for a toddler and preschooler, I took Zumba and Pilates classes several times a week up until the very end. Despite the differences in diet and exercise, I gained the same amount...27 pounds...all three times. And got back to my pre-pregnancy weight in 3-4 months. I credit breastfeeding (I swore I would nurse my kids until they left for college if it meant I could eat ice cream every day)...but I also know moms who held on to the last few pounds until they weaned their little ones. Everybody (and every body) is different.

As for fear of the baby belly, you will most likely be so captivated by every kick and flutter...not to mention the feet and elbows you see trying to poke though your skin, that you will come to love it.

I'm on my fifth pregnancy, and I pretty much just looked chubby (I am to begin with, my weight has gone up and down with pregnancies over the years; I'm here to control weight gain and get back on track once I deliver in February) from the time I walked out of the bedroom I am one of those people who puffs up with fluids, gains 40-50 pounds during pregnancy no matter what I eat, leaves the hospital ten pounds heavier than that, and then loses all of it in 2 weeks. (I basically feel like I can fly as the water weight comes off.) The first 6 months of breastfeeding knocks off another 20 pounds. (And then I wean without changing my diet, and I gain back a ton of weight. Hoping to focus on that this time around.)

Anyway, I've learned to love what my body does because I want my daughters to love theirs. Anecdote: I was recently feeling like a beached whale, lying in bed wearing only a bra and underwear because putting clothes on sounded too ambitious, and my four year old walked in and raved about how beautiful I was, and she asked if she would be that beautiful someday. Awesome feeling. (And of course I told her she already was.)

This, I think, is what has given me some perspective on my body changing: my first daughter was stillborn. My second came 14 weeks early, and he spent 11 weeks in the hospital. I was on bed rest with my third to avoid NICU time (and it was 100% worth it). A few stretch marks after all that is such a small thing. I have friends who spent YEARS trying to conceive, with no discernable reason why they couldn't, and two who were never able to stay pregnant and went the adoption route. Talking to them about their journeys to become parents, despite my own struggles, makes me embarrassed of how amazing my jiggly leftover belly is. I hope you make it here too, because it's a good place to be.