Rude and miserable people vs kind and motivational people
myles1230
Posts: 163 Member
Good afternoon MFP peeps! I’ve been using this app since 2015 I find it’s a great asset in keeping track of daily calories. I recently decided to join the community page to make new friends wanting to achieve their fitness goals. And to motivate others that are having a hard time staying focused. However I’ve noticed there are some very rude and miserable people on here who enjoy posting rude comments and replies. If you are one of those people please refrain from replying on any of my posts, I don’t need that kind of negativity in my life. Please and thank you! For those who are on here for the right reasons and are kind and motivational people feel free to add me or reply or comment on any of my posts.
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Replies
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It's been my experience that every helpful poster on these forums, every single one, will be called rude, mean, negative, troll, bully, know-it-all, etc. at some point or another no matter how carefully they phrase their advice. Posts like this tend not to be very helpful. When every helpful poster is called out as mean at some point or another, then making a post like this without examples or qualifications just ends up pointing fingers at everyone.
There is some actual rudeness that goes above and beyond what should be acceptable here. Report it (use the actual report function not the flags) or call it out where you see it. It's a public forum and you won't reach everyone with a post or be able control who posts on your posts. But posts like this just add to the negative atmosphere that you're trying to combat instead of solving anything.
Be the change you want to see instead of perpetuating the cycle.16 -
diannethegeek wrote: »It's been my experience that every helpful poster on these forums, every single one, will be called rude, mean, negative, troll, bully, know-it-all, etc. at some point or another no matter how carefully they phrase their advice. Posts like this tend not to be very helpful. When every helpful poster is called out as mean at some point or another, then making a post like this without examples or qualifications just ends up pointing fingers at everyone.
There is some actual rudeness that goes above and beyond what should be acceptable here. Report it (use the actual report function not the flags) or call it out where you see it. It's a public forum and you won't reach everyone with a post or be able control who posts on your posts. But posts like this just add to the negative atmosphere that you're trying to combat instead of solving anything.
Be the change you want to see instead of perpetuating the cycle.
It’s a general statement. So if the shoe fits wear it. I am being the change by posting a respectable general statement, instead of reporting people or being rude in return. I don’t have the time to waste reporting people and so forth that’s why I created this “general “ message. Thanks for your kind reply though...6 -
I like to help when someone asks for advice, engage in discussion on pages, and offer support.. I'm not one to call someone out on something, because we each do what works for us. Debates get heated on here, so I try to steer clear because I don't have all the answers and am not a doctor. You can send me an add if you want.4
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I like to help when someone asks for advice, engage in discussion on pages, and offer support.. I'm not one to call someone out on something, because we each do what works for us. Debates get heated on here, so I try to steer clear because I don't have all the answers and am not a doctor. You can send me an add if you want.
I’m adding you now! U are Exactly the type of “friends”I’m looking for on here! Good stuff bro!4 -
moosmum1972 wrote: »diannethegeek wrote: »It's been my experience that every helpful poster on these forums, every single one, will be called rude, mean, negative, troll, bully, know-it-all, etc. at some point or another no matter how carefully they phrase their advice. Posts like this tend not to be very helpful. When every helpful poster is called out as mean at some point or another, then making a post like this without examples or qualifications just ends up pointing fingers at everyone.
There is some actual rudeness that goes above and beyond what should be acceptable here. Report it (use the actual report function not the flags) or call it out where you see it. It's a public forum and you won't reach everyone with a post or be able control who posts on your posts. But posts like this just add to the negative atmosphere that you're trying to combat instead of solving anything.
Be the change you want to see instead of perpetuating the cycle.
It’s a general statement. So if the shoe fits wear it. I am being the change by posting a respectable general statement, instead of reporting people or being rude in return. I don’t have the time to waste reporting people and so forth that’s why I created this “general “ message. Thanks for your kind reply though...
It's the internet though. ....people will say what they want.
I understand but this is MFP not Facebook! Just saying.2 -
No, MFP is anonymous and thus likely far worse. Throw in that forums in general are brutal and you soon realise MFP is actually really really tame.
That said, never sure of the point of threads like this. Nobody thinks they are the "mean people" and if they do think they are they're not likely keeping a list of people they shouldn't respond to because they called them mean. So it's kind of pointless.
And this post will probably get me labelled a mean people. And that's okay because internet.8 -
What exactly was so rude that made you post this?
Have you read the community guidelines? You should know what they are so you know what is and isn’t allowed. For example, you cannot attack the messenger, just the message itself.
Also, flagging things repeatedly that are not community violations is a violation in itself.
I have never seen “rudeness” on these forums and I’ve been here daily for a year. I’d love to see what made you post this
ETA that I’d rather someone be “rude” and tell me the truth rather than someone be “kind and motivational” just spewing a bunch of BS.4 -
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Oh god, I laughed too much. Red wine talking.
I say this often round these here parts but support doesn't always mean agreeing and cheerleading. You don't tell your loved ones jumping of a cliff is a great idea just because they think it's a fabulous thing to do do you? Same should apply everywhere.
Aside from that. Can we come up with a thing for MFP like "vaguebooking" because that's what this is.3 -
moosmum1972 wrote: »moosmum1972 wrote: »diannethegeek wrote: »It's been my experience that every helpful poster on these forums, every single one, will be called rude, mean, negative, troll, bully, know-it-all, etc. at some point or another no matter how carefully they phrase their advice. Posts like this tend not to be very helpful. When every helpful poster is called out as mean at some point or another, then making a post like this without examples or qualifications just ends up pointing fingers at everyone.
There is some actual rudeness that goes above and beyond what should be acceptable here. Report it (use the actual report function not the flags) or call it out where you see it. It's a public forum and you won't reach everyone with a post or be able control who posts on your posts. But posts like this just add to the negative atmosphere that you're trying to combat instead of solving anything.
Be the change you want to see instead of perpetuating the cycle.
It’s a general statement. So if the shoe fits wear it. I am being the change by posting a respectable general statement, instead of reporting people or being rude in return. I don’t have the time to waste reporting people and so forth that’s why I created this “general “ message. Thanks for your kind reply though...
It's the internet though. ....people will say what they want.
I understand but this is MFP not Facebook! Just saying.
And???it's the internet people are entitled to their view whether you think it's rude or not.
By the last couple of comments I see the shoe fits very well and you wear it very well. So keep on with your entertaining comments. Have fun! I’ll be at the gym!8 -
OP You realize, don't you, that the difference is coffee?1
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I agree with OP; but often i believe it is because people do not always consider how their words will be read ("heard") rather than the intent to be rude or mean. It is easier to be blunt on the internet, and to forget there are real, live, feeling people on the other end.6
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Calling people rude and miserable is really not very nice. If you don't like the person commenting on your posts then use the "ignore" function. Simples
I find it very disheartening to see posts like this making it seem as if this site is not a helpful one. New people might see your post and be scared to join the community and that would be a shame as this is a great resource for weight loss and fitness. So many experienced people willing to share their knowledge.
Just approach any people you percieve to be rude and miserable as they turn up in your posts. A general shout out is really not terribly helpful.6 -
What if I'm rude, but happy about it? No misery here.
In all honestly, a "rude people" thread pops up every so often. I think it's a failure to communicate effectively. I've been here off and on for years and the dominating theme when a rude people thread crops up, is it's usually (not always I know I know) because someone was disagreed with and took it super personally.4 -
I agree with OP; but often i believe it is because people do not always consider how their words will be read ("heard") rather than the intent to be rude or mean. It is easier to be blunt on the internet, and to forget there are real, live, feeling people on the other end.
I’m to the point. The way someone reads that is on them not me. There is no intonation in the written word and something stated just factually can be interpreted by the reader 500 different ways depending on their mood, life experiences, how their day is going etc etc etc. It’s not my responsibility to mitigate that. Post on a public forum be prepared to hear things you don’t like but the beauty of the internet is you can just disregard it.4 -
Is it just me, or is OP coming off as the rudest one in the room?8
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@myles1230
Thank you! Please feel free to add me too.1 -
Man i made this big hudge response and it didnt post lol, lemmie make it a little shorter cause i forgot 90% of all that motivational speech i wrote out, ive just learned a lesson in the past few weeks thats pretty much common sense but i had to have someone remind me, u can only let people get to u if you let yr own mind get the best of yrself, u cant control the thoughts and actions of others but what u can do is control yr own life and focus on whats important, you! i get up every morning and u have 2 list of very basic things that most of us over look but we all know, its a list of do's and donts that i try to implement in my everyday life and that to me is whats important and from the sound of yr post you are going to be a great centered man i can see it just focus on changing yrself and if someone doesnt meet what u wanna surrund yrself with in life u gotta say goodbye to those people and move on, ill shoot u a friend request and heres a toast to living life and improving ourselves and being the best men that we are, amen and god bless1
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moosmum1972 wrote: »diannethegeek wrote: »It's been my experience that every helpful poster on these forums, every single one, will be called rude, mean, negative, troll, bully, know-it-all, etc. at some point or another no matter how carefully they phrase their advice. Posts like this tend not to be very helpful. When every helpful poster is called out as mean at some point or another, then making a post like this without examples or qualifications just ends up pointing fingers at everyone.
There is some actual rudeness that goes above and beyond what should be acceptable here. Report it (use the actual report function not the flags) or call it out where you see it. It's a public forum and you won't reach everyone with a post or be able control who posts on your posts. But posts like this just add to the negative atmosphere that you're trying to combat instead of solving anything.
Be the change you want to see instead of perpetuating the cycle.
It’s a general statement. So if the shoe fits wear it. I am being the change by posting a respectable general statement, instead of reporting people or being rude in return. I don’t have the time to waste reporting people and so forth that’s why I created this “general “ message. Thanks for your kind reply though...
It's the internet though. ....people will say what they want.
I understand but this is MFP not Facebook! Just saying.
I think a lot of people say what they want on Facebook, as well. I've seen plenty of rude and miserable Facebook posts between so-called "friends". Just because it's MFP doesn't mean it's any different really.
I've also been on MFP for several years and seen plenty of posts/replies both positive and negative. This is the risk you take when posting on ANY public forum. You're not always going to like what people say or interpret things they way they meant them. I'm sure I'm guilty of misinterpretation plenty of times but I've learned not to get my feelings hurt over words on a screen.
Here's what I've discovered about MFP - if you don't want to risk ANY negative feedback or a possible rude post, then stick to your newsfeed and a small group of friends and stay out of the public forums.5 -
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