Has logging affected your social life?
Live_life_well
Posts: 86 Member
I have been logging for a week now and have turned down two social eating events this week because the prospect of not knowing what is being put in the food bothers me.
Am I the only one to turn down social eating events to avoid the hassle of not being able to log accurately?
Am I the only one to turn down social eating events to avoid the hassle of not being able to log accurately?
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Replies
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Probably not. I haven't had an issue with full meals because I don't have much of a social life but I've turned down a friend twice because she insists on having multiple servings of donuts at her place every time I go over. And, she's diabetic! I figure me turning her down is good for both of us. Although, she probably eats the donuts anyway.11
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I did turn down social events at first... but over time, I realized that I can’t turn them down forever. Instead, I found ways to work around them - either by looking up menus in advance and pre-logging, “banking” calories for social events, or bringing my own food so I know what I am eating for sure (obviously each of these options have their own place and time to use).
If you want to make this a sustainable change in your lifestyle, you will eventually have to figure out your way of managing social events. Likely you won’t go the rest of your life not celebrating holidays, anniversaries, birthdays, etc. right?
Good luck.15 -
No, it hasn't affected my social life. I go to events. Unless it's a plated meal, I usually have a fair amount of choice of what to eat, and if it is a plated meal, I don't have to eat everything if I don't want to.
As you get more experience in logging, you'll likely gain confidence in estimating food amounts. If you cook for yourself at home, you'll also gain competence in mentally deconstructing dishes other people make.6 -
I don’t turn down anything because of food. I’ll sit at a birthday dinner and sip my Diet Coke makin everyone feel weird with the best of em. But more often than not I’ll order something modest and guess the calories.
It’s affected my social life in that I write the weight of my fruit on the peel with sharpie because I weigh them all at once and just pick them up to take to work throughout the week...and the look I got from my coworkers when I explained what that writing was...if they would’ve had a straight jacket...20 -
No, never. Life is too short to pass up the chance to spend time with people I care about because of my self-control (or lack thereof).
Even when I was being super strict about logging I still made time for friends and social events. I was just really particular about what I put in my mouth. I discovered that every single restaurant has some healthier choices and it is up to me to make those decisions and stick with them. Going to a friend's house is a bit different, but you don't have to gobble like a Thanksgiving turkey and get a prize for the clean-plate club. Nobody is really paying attention to what you put on your plate except for you!
Last year I gave up alcohol during Lent and I still went out for happy hour with friends. Now THAT was a test of willpower, but I passed it and still had a good time. Club soda with lime was my go-to cocktail. Zero calories!12 -
My first social event this year was brunch with a friend today. I looked up the menu in advance and calorie-logged (best guess) to help me decide what to order. It really helped me stick to it when I had to make a game time decision (looking up hollandaise sauce in advance really steers you away from wanting to spend so many calories on just those few bites!)
I'm traveling for work this upcoming week, so airport food and hotel/restaurant food for a week will be a struggle, but no time like the present to start making good decisions!2 -
It's a bad plan, IMO, to severely constrain your social life for calorie certainty reasons. The priorities are off.
For 2 or 3 (or so) events in a week, estimating should be close enough. Don't lowball wishfully; make your honest best estimate. Make a fair estimate of quantities, snap a phone photo for later consideration if you can do it without looking like a fake hipster foodie jerk, use a similar restaurant entry from the MFP database, or deconstruct the ingredients and log those. Try to be fair, but don't obsess. Just make your best estimate, then go on with life.
In the long run, it'll even out and work fine. I lost around a third of my body weight doing this periodically.
We need friends!14 -
The forests are much smaller, but lumberjacks don't like sharing thier pancakes anyways.2
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For reals though, nah. I just try to keep track as much as possible so I can log when I get back home.0
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No, I don't skip anything.
If possible I look up menus before and have an idea what I want and what is a reasonable meal. Or I may eat at maintance for a day so I can have a margarita.
Or- last Saturday my friends and I went to this awesome restaurant that I love to celebrate Christmas and I said "*kitten* it" and ate all the things and had three drinks. I had a two day bump in weight before a new low. Just get right back into a routine the next day and drink plenty of water.
Life is for living, living with people, laughing with people, and sometimes it's for overindulging. I didn't get fat in a day, one day won't ruin it.3 -
It's a bad plan, IMO, to severely constrain your social life for calorie certainty reasons. The priorities are off.
For 2 or 3 (or so) events in a week, estimating should be close enough. Don't lowball wishfully; make your honest best estimate. Make a fair estimate of quantities, snap a phone photo for later consideration if you can do it without looking like a fake hipster foodie jerk, use a similar restaurant entry from the MFP database, or deconstruct the ingredients and log those. Try to be fair, but don't obsess. Just make your best estimate, then go on with life.
In the long run, it'll even out and work fine. I lost around a third of my body weight doing this periodically.
We need friends!
Agreed!
I "deconstruct the ingredients and log those" at places without calorie information.
Sometimes if I'm on a tight calorie budget, this means choosing something on the menu that I know I can guess the ingredients to log when other choices might make that difficult.2 -
My social life has not really changed. I was never eating out or eating other people's food every day though- just once a week. Also not a drinker so didn't change anything there.
One meal or one day here and there where you are not 100% accurate in logging calories will not interfere with your weight loss if most days you are as accurate as you can be. Logging food isn't required to lose weight. It is just a helpful tool.
Look up nutritional information for restaurants. If the restaurant does not provide information find similar dish from another place to log. If it is homemade food look up a recipe for the dish or ask the person who made it for their recipe.
Take reasonable portions and use common sense. Very few things besides plain vegetables can you eat heaping plates of. Put more vegetables on your plate to bulk out your meal. Get a salad with your meal.
Pay attention when you log and learn what portion sizes look like for various foods.
Things that are fried, breaded, covered in sauces, contain lots of cheese or nuts, or are very sugary are probably higher calorie and you should eat smaller portions. Go easy on added condiments and dressings. Don't eat whole bowls of guacamole, hummus or other higher calorie dips. Watch portion sizes of rice, potatoes, pasta and bread.
Take some food you feel comfortable eating with you to share to a party or dinner at someone's home. Invite people to your home.
Watch the drink calories. You might want to choose lower calorie or no calorie drinks.
Eat a bit lighter for your other meals that day or other days that week if you think an event will be quite a bit higher calorie than normal for you.1 -
I don't turn down going. But I have learned to keep my food choices to myself. Telling people you are choosing to eat different than you used to opens a HUGE can of worms. If someone really presses you on "why" you won't over indulge smile and say you're full. Leave it at that don't elaborate and enjoy people's company.7
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I don't turn down going. But I have learned to keep my food choices to myself. Telling people you are choosing to eat different than you used to opens a HUGE can of worms. If someone really presses you on "why" you won't over indulge smile and say you're full. Leave it at that don't elaborate and enjoy people's company.
Agreed. People like to say their opinions on what you are eating and I've found myself in debates before about it, which is ridiculous really when all I am doing is eating a bit healthier and sticking to a (not particularly low) calorie limit.2 -
Well. I’m not as popular as you so don't have social events that often. So when I do I just go and don’t worry about.3
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I used to be so strict with calorie counting that some friends stopped inviting me to gatherings I always went to because I made it weird by not sharing in their birthday libations or their homemade quiche because it would put me over my calorie goal for the day. It almost ruined a good friendship.
I do my best to track while I'm on my own, but I never let tracking keep me from enjoying the company of the people I care about.4 -
I do the deconstruct and log, in general, but will miss some things depending. I also pad my calories with the days surrounding by going a little short if I need to, or do a little extra cardio. Booze is a problem though, I almost never want to spend my cals on it outside of exactly when I choose so it's worth it to me.1
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It used to, but I'm doing a lot better this time around. If I know an event is coming up that day I eat pretty light leading up and if I can plan ahead I do...if not then I set a mental expectation. If I haven't gone over calories in a week or so I might budget myself to net a couple hundred over maintenance. I've found by mentally giving myself that permission to say "okay...I have 900 calories to spend...I could get two hard ciders and that leaves me about 550....I could snack on something that is grilled or have veggies and probably stay pretty close and still enjoy" I don't get that feast or famine panic and then binge eat because I am so afraid of doing it wrong. Sometimes I will also push hard and do a longer/higher intense workout that burns more (like 450cals instead of 250) and I will tell myself that I've earned an extra X calories for the event. Mentally I'm finding that I make better choices when I have these expectations because it's planned, its accounted for and I'm really proud of the good work so I find that I'm not racking up 1000s of calories in one event anymore being more mindful (usually about 700-1000)3
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WhereIsPJSoles wrote: »I don’t turn down anything because of food. I’ll sit at a birthday dinner and sip my Diet Coke makin everyone feel weird with the best of em. But more often than not I’ll order something modest and guess the calories.
It’s affected my social life in that I write the weight of my fruit on the peel with sharpie because I weigh them all at once and just pick them up to take to work throughout the week...and the look I got from my coworkers when I explained what that writing was...if they would’ve had a straight jacket...
Lol I’m the same way, I actually measure my banana with a measuring tape and write how many inches it is on the peel with a sharpie. Everyone thinks I’m insane.
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WhereIsPJSoles wrote: »I don’t turn down anything because of food. I’ll sit at a birthday dinner and sip my Diet Coke makin everyone feel weird with the best of em. But more often than not I’ll order something modest and guess the calories.
It’s affected my social life in that I write the weight of my fruit on the peel with sharpie because I weigh them all at once and just pick them up to take to work throughout the week...and the look I got from my coworkers when I explained what that writing was...if they would’ve had a straight jacket...
Lol I’m the same way, I actually measure my banana with a measuring tape and write how many inches it is on the peel with a sharpie. Everyone thinks I’m insane.
@DarianJP I don't want to put you off being diligent, but you should be weighing food in grams on a digital scale, not measuring with tape.6 -
no.
plan ahead. use similar (higher calorie) options in the database. deconstruct the food. order lighter options, or a plain salad.WhereIsPJSoles wrote: »I don’t turn down anything because of food. I’ll sit at a birthday dinner and sip my Diet Coke makin everyone feel weird with the best of em. But more often than not I’ll order something modest and guess the calories.
It’s affected my social life in that I write the weight of my fruit on the peel with sharpie because I weigh them all at once and just pick them up to take to work throughout the week...and the look I got from my coworkers when I explained what that writing was...if they would’ve had a straight jacket...
Lol I’m the same way, I actually measure my banana with a measuring tape and write how many inches it is on the peel with a sharpie. Everyone thinks I’m insane.
thats not how its done. id think you were crazy too, to be honest. lol but if it works for you.... ok.
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It's all about finding balance. Are you going to forgo social gatherings for the rest of your life?0
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I absolutely have avoided social events, particularly when I was starting out and didn't have a good grasp on guesstimating calories when eating out. But, once I had a better grasp it was easier to go out to social things and try to make a good estimate of the calories I consumed.
One real benefit to this was actually learning to say "no" to certain things that I probably didn't want to do or didn't have time to do in the first place. Now, I only go to events I really want to go to and I enjoy the time that I am there. If I know where I am going, I try to find a menu online before I go to decide what I'll order, and I do my best to stick to it once there. I try to avoid mindless drinking and eating while out. If I know it will be a huge calorie bomb, I'll eat very lightly or fast during the day. And I spend less money eating out.
In the long term, I don't believe your social life will suffer unless you don't let yourself go anywhere or do anything. Let yourself go out, but be responsible. You'll still have plenty of fun with friends and family. Avoiding social events is no way to live, and eventually your friends will stop inviting you which you certainly do not want.
ETA: One thing I am happy to avoid now that I almost never avoided before were happy hours. I used to go to happy hour with people several times per week. Now I go a few times a month. I still love happy hour and hanging out with my friends, but those happy hours were no good for my health and wallet.1 -
WhereIsPJSoles wrote: »I don’t turn down anything because of food. I’ll sit at a birthday dinner and sip my Diet Coke makin everyone feel weird with the best of em. But more often than not I’ll order something modest and guess the calories.
It’s affected my social life in that I write the weight of my fruit on the peel with sharpie because I weigh them all at once and just pick them up to take to work throughout the week...and the look I got from my coworkers when I explained what that writing was...if they would’ve had a straight jacket...
Lol I’m the same way, I actually measure my banana with a measuring tape and write how many inches it is on the peel with a sharpie. Everyone thinks I’m insane.
@DarianJP I don't want to put you off being diligent, but you should be weighing food in grams on a digital scale, not measuring with tape.
No worries! I weigh all of my food but bananas are the exception, since I’m not eating the peel I feel like weighing it may not be as accurate as measuring it. That’s just my opinion though.0 -
It hasn't impacted me. Honestly, I needed to figure out how to live life while doing this, because I knew I'd have to forever to keep the weight off. Cancelling and not going out isn't living life.0
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Impromptu social meals do stress me out a bit. I like to pre-plan my day.
If it's a planned meal out, I just skip breakfast and have a very light lunch and save the majority of my calories for that meal. So it works out well.1 -
It can be hard at times when you really want to indulge with friends. Idk, for me personally I enjoy my time out with friends/family. I don't turn down events. If I can track then I do. If I can't track I try to eat 'healthy' meals or small portions of 'unhealthy' foods. If I just want to enjoy myself for that day then I do that. Sure, progress might be a tad bit slower but I'm not willing to let my goals affect my social life.0
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What I have been struggling with is people asking to get together with me Sat and Sun mornings. (My bootcamp, YOGA, and body pump times)
I used to frequently go for breakfast and coffee with them then. When I say that I am going to the gym for my class I get told you need to live a little too, go later, blah blah blah.
I even said "come with me to yoga and we can go after that." I got laughed at.1 -
Don't become a hermit! Get out there and enjoy everything ... Just plan ahead! Most restaurants post calorie for meals and have websites with full menus along with clean options just ask for sauces and dressings on the side. If portions are too big for one sitting just let Food sit in front of you while you chat and tell server it was too much and need to pack the rest to take home.
Tomorrow's lunch looked after!!0 -
One other tip to add:
When you DO go out for dinner with your friends, don't talk about calories or dieting. Or how so many foods on the menu are super high-calorie. You don't want your friends to feel guilty about picking their favourite meals around you.
I find that when I start focusing on weight loss, it's too easy to talktalktalk about it. But it can be annoying for your friends who don't care about calories and just want to enjoy some dang food, lol.1
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