new and frustrated!

Just eat less, consistently, and walk a lot. You can do that! This food and exercise diary is a great tool to help.

This is the right place to be! You need to be committed to changing your eating and exercise habits FOR LIFE, not just for the life of the 'diet' then go back to your old ways when you reach your goal. It is a life long change. It doesn't happen overnight, and you need to ease into it, and learn from your past mistakes.

5 guidelines:

1. Avoid sodium as much as possible, including eating out, high salt items like processed foods and chips (avoid yes, but no need to remove all together, a little indulgence every once in a while is ok, it is life after all.)
2. The 8 cups of water a day rule is baseline for survival without being dehydrated. I am amazed at how many people come on here and have a hard time getting their water. If you are properly hydrated, your body has no reason to store (retain) extra water, which adds a lot of extra weight, sometimes as much as 5-8lb after a salty meal. If you do have a salty meal, counter it with 4 cups of water extra, at least.
3. avoid the inside isles of the grocery store. That's where most of the processed high sugar, high fat and high sodium foods are. Moderate the amount of these foods that you eat. Try to stay with fresh meats, dairy and veggies. It's way better for you and you'll FEEL so much better.
4. MOVE your body at least 30 minutes 5-6 days a week. Doesn't have to mean joining a gym, simply walking around the neighborhood, or using the high school's track, or climbing the stairs. It doesn't have to be expensive.
5. ASK QUESTIONS when you feel in doubt. And never be ashamed of venting here. WE all have the same common goal, to lose weight, maintain it, and be healthier in mind, body and spirit.

You can do this! MFP is a great place to get the help and support you need, as well as motivation. You have the right idea of mini gaols, I set those for myself, like when I loose 10 pounds, I get a new shirt, or new pair of shoes, a little motivation, but enough to keep wanting more. My exerrcise of choice is walking. I hope one day to be jogging, and maybe even running, but for now walkinfg is it.

Here's how I started:

1) tracking for a couple of weeks before I worried about losing.
(although seeing what I was eating I couldn't help but rein back a bit)

2) seeing where I could make small changes on things that weren't that important to me.
(Don't even think of taking chocolate out of my diet!!!)
--Reducing quantities where I won't notice it so much
--Swapping out things instead of eliminating them.

3) Look at my diary and started adding foods that had positive healthy effects specifically for the health issue in my family.
I found most of the things I "should" add were really yummy too! salmon, avocado, oatmeal, mango, red grapes....
(Sort of think of food as medicine to deal with family history of various health issue oatmeal is good for heart health, mango and red grapes lower cholesterol, tumeric and cinnamon good for arthritis)

4) every couple of weeks I see where I can make another couple of small changes.
If you completely revamp your diet, it's way easy to revert to old ways in times of stress.
If you make a series of small changes, food still offers you some sense of comfort.
sort of a comfort continuum, and after a while the first small changes will seem comforting in themselves.
You don't have to be perfect you just have to do better.

5) also rather than being uberstrict with the target MFP set for me I did the math to find out the calories needed to maintain my goal weight and my current weight and I gave myself a range with 1200 as my rock bottom, lose 1 lb/wk as my target*** and maintain my goal weight as the top of my range. As long as I keep within in this range I'll lose. I tend to naturally zig zag my calories 3-4 at very close to my target and then a higher calorie day closer to the top of my range.

As long as I stayed under maintain my current weight calories I won't gain. So no need to throw in the towel, just pick-up where I left off.

Once I found ways to lessen the stress, I found it way easier to focus on the process and let the results follow. (It's what worked for me some people need the stress to get them motivated. Me I get scared and overwhelmed and don't see the big goal as acheivable. I only worry about it 1 lb at a time.)

I did have to take a break for a month due to a health scare, but otherwise I kept with the slow and steady approach. Took me 9 months (including the month off) At first I lost at the rate of about 3 lbs per month, but the closer you get to the goal the slower it goes. So be patient and hang in there.

***also once my lose 1 lb/week target was down to 1200 calories I switch to lose 1/2 lb/ week (1200 cal rock bottom, 1/2 lb/week as my target, maintain goal weight as the high end of my range.)

Food is not the enemy.
Oddly enough on my journey here I've reduced guilt over food.
I have the occassional treat and I fully enjoy it with no guilt involved.
The thing is since I'm not eating crap all the time the occassional treat is just that a TREAT it's special and I enjoy it so much more than when I was unconsciously shovel junk food into my face.

I figure if I've got a good plan that I can actually maintain I can keep this off for a long time to come, without feeling deprived.

Good Luck

We all have to start somewhere. This is a new beginning for you. Forget the past and plan for the future. Age is definitely a factor and if you start now you won't be in the same boat I am 20 years from now. I am 56 and finally getting it right!

But if this helps you..I have lost almost 35 lbs in a year and it may be slow coming off but at least I know I am doing it right this time. Baby steps is the right frame of mind. Don't try to lose too fast and don't get discouraged if you have periods of time that you don't lose. Just don't let yourself get into the rut of, well I haven't lost anything, this isn't working, what the heck. That is when you start to gain it back. Your body will tell you when you need a change..that is when it usually goes into a stand still.

We both have a long way to go and positive thoughts is what is going to get us there. Think Positive and use MFP! It works wonders for motivation. There are a lot of people on here with the same situations. Gather great positive friends and use them to help you get through your new journey!!

I'm new too and could have almost written your post. I am at the same weight I was the day before I delivered my youngest child. 9 YRS AGO. I can so relate to that. Also, I have lost weight in the past only to put it back on. To me, maintaining is the hardest part. I hope to be more successful this time. I just turned 40 so I understand that it is a struggle the older you get. Just don't let that get in your way. You can do this! Feel free to add me as a friend for support.

I just started too and have 60 lbs to lose. Even writing it is terrifying. Hadn't been on the scales in two years. Some of the best advice I ever got when I was eating healthy is: every day you don't gain is your first victory. Every day you feel better is another one. It takes us years to gain all the weight and than I want to lose it on a ridiculous schedule that I set. So I'm trying to do this one day at a time, adding some more exercise than I am doing, drinking the water and trying to take a year-long view. Even if I only lost 20 lbs in a year, it would be 20 I wasn't carrying around!