Kindness Matters
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Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.
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It starts with being kind to yourself then your natural state of love shines through. You can't have positive thoughts without negative ones but you can see them for what they really are. Just thoughts. Meditation has changed my mental state 110 percent. Good thread...loving kindness is where it's AT.2
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HappyKat--Your description of holding the door is so spot on--we are rushing (and you could use someone helping you in that moment) and then you have to give one more thing and instead of breaking you, it gives you this energy that you didn't see coming. So cool.0
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Elenora thank you so much for sharing your story! I truly believe that we "absorb" the negative behavior thrown at us UNTIL we realize what is happening. I think once we realize that we don't have to take all of that in, things start to turn around. I do think though that this requires 2 things--first, you have to create positive thoughts from within as DifferentView points out because those negative people are everywhere and we can't completely avoid them. What we can do, however, is work on dealing with them as needed but putting more time into surrounding ourselves with kind people. Does this make sense? Then, you won't have to hide in any space anymore. But as long as you need to hide, we got your back!0
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I am so inspired by all of you and your amazing effort to achieve fitness. Thank you for letting me share your journey! Enjoy your weekend!0
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We are all so quick to judge...
One never knows the struggles someone else has to endure.
I try (but have to remind myself) if someone doesn't smile or is rude or mean...perhaps something awful is happening in their lives. It's not you...it's their lives at the moment...Most people - deep down maybe- are good people.3 -
"And I said to my body. Softly. 'I want to be your friend.' It took a long breath and replied 'I've been waiting for you to say that my whole life."
A quote I saw on one of the MFP posts with any image of a flower morphing into a person. Kindness to each other and ourselves!2 -
We are all so quick to judge...
@vegmebuff One never knows the struggles someone else has to endure.
I try (but have to remind myself) if someone doesn't smile or is rude or mean...perhaps something awful is happening in their lives. It's not you...it's their lives at the moment...Most people - deep down maybe- are good people.
I LOVE this...! So true, we don’t know what’s happening behind closed doors (and windows.)
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We already have nice things to say about you.
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I’m not trying to intrude on your discussion but I was having a pretty miserable day and I happened upon your thread. After reading your positive comments to one another or about others I felt a little better. As you know some days the world is just MEAN and it can kinda get to you. Thank you for reminding me that the kindnesses part may have to start with me. Even if I wasn’t really feeling it. If I start being kind today I will FEEL better even if nobody sees it. I will know it. And that miserable feeling will go away because I’m doing good for others. Thank you. You are good people.3
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I answered a phone call at work from a man needing some information. His inquiries ended up taking a significant amount of time, but I managed to find everything he needed. When he was ending the call he asked for my name and thanked me, saying that I was the first stranger to be kind to him today and he appreciated my time. How thoughtful of him to even mention it.
Pay kindness forward!3 -
When a homeless person asks for money - even if I don't give them anything - I will acknowledge them by looking them in the eye and answering them.
I use to not make any eye contact...sometimes ignoring them completely.
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Yes it does, thank you for the reminder ..
I wish there were more of these positive threads.
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Posting here so as to follow kind posts! I have just a tiny thought to contribute: all our efforts, frustrations, successes, sweat and tears shed in order to lose weight really do all count for nothing if we don't live with kindness for others. Does heaven depend upon a fit figure? Or a kind soul?4
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I really love this thread so much! We have to deal with negativity everyday and it’s usually by ourselves. We are so quick to being kind to others but will be so negative towards ourselves. I think if we try to be kinder to ourselves and not talk down to ourselves or criticize every flaw, it will make being kinder to others easy.3
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I really love this thread so much! We have to deal with negativity everyday and it’s usually by ourselves. We are so quick to being kind to others but will be so negative towards ourselves. I think if we try to be kinder to ourselves and not talk down to ourselves or criticize every flaw, it will make being kinder to others easy.
so true...it's hard to be nice to someone if you don't like/value yourself.
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Mom6Girls--This is your space too. Stay in touch. I started the thread because just as you said, things can get overwhelming and pretty rough. Every new person that jumps in here gives me a ray of hope that there are people out there that value kindness.1
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HappyKat5--I really believe our struggles with fitness are impacted by the negativity. I think we take in all the negativity from around us. Sometimes it is as close as "friends," coworkers, or family and then it is even more difficult to find a peaceful space to build our personal strength and confidence.1
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artbyrachelh: I can't speak for the group but for me, when my fitness doesn't include peace of heart and mind it feels just as bad as extra pounds. A healthy body--fit and trim--is hopefully one part, together with a happy heart and mind. Like this group has said, we have to get rid of the extra pounds AND the self-doubt If we can stay in a positive space hopefully everything else will fall into place. 1
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Welcome! Stay with us--we are here to help! The first step is the toughest isn't it? Those of us who have been there realize that by "starting back" you are . . . well, brave and amazing!
Our mission here is to surround ourselves with kindness while recognizing that our fitness challenges may have more to do with not enough kindness in our lives rather than too many calories. Knowing this maybe there will only be steps forward. If we aren't perfect maybe we will quickly give ourselves a hug and keep moving ahead! We just started, but I cannot wait to start hearing from everyone as to whether they are successful by logging not only calories but moments of kindness! Welcome--you are brave and amazing!0 -
MidLyfeCrises wrote: »This thread is perfect for me right now. I've just returned and have been feeling bad about it.
I’m thrilled you joined us! These are good people. They care about All of you! You may not feel like you know them yet but come back EVERY Day to find something Positive! I’m 49 and the mother of 6 daughters! I know all about mid life!! This life is meant to be awesome at ALL its stages! All we have to do is find the joy! I promise it’s there. Just keep moving forward!! You will find it!2 -
While counting calories matters to most of us on a fitness journey, counting moments of kindness directed our way matters even more. One word of kindness is far more powerful in achieving fitness than 1200 calories. This group is for anyone that needs support but most importantly, simply needs the power of a kind word.
Oh, can I share a moment of kindness that really helped me recently? I work full time and care for both my disabled parents when I'm not at work (like, I've had 3 nights away from them in 2.5yrs - it's been a full on commitment). In January, I was out to brunch with my best mate and whining that I was gaining weight and didn't feel like I had the energy to do anything about it and she leans in, grabs my hand and says: "You can't pour from an empty cup, Ceej. Take care of yourself first" and it was the kindness equivalent of a slap in the face. It was the first time in years someone had... I dunno, almost given me permission to look after myself as well. Anyway, that's what I thought of when I read the OP's comment.5 -
coolchick207 wrote: »
Oh, can I share a moment of kindness that really helped me recently? I work full time and care for both my disabled parents when I'm not at work (like, I've had 3 nights away from them in 2.5yrs - it's been a full on commitment). In January, I was out to brunch with my best mate and whining that I was gaining weight and didn't feel like I had the energy to do anything about it and she leans in, grabs my hand and says: "You can't pour from an empty cup, Ceej. Take care of yourself first" and it was the kindness equivalent of a slap in the face. It was the first time in years someone had... I dunno, almost given me permission to look after myself as well. Anyway, that's what I thought of when I read the OP's comment.
She sounds like a good friend. I like truth-tellers. You are a beautiful person to give of yourself so completely. And taking time for yourself and "recharging your batteries" is part of your gift of self. We're here for you! Thank you for sharing your story!
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Today I was a redheaded angry mess. I get that way sometimes even when I do my best to control my temper. I received some news that was upsetting and I got mad. I mean really mad. But my spouse of almost 30 yrs very firmly says to me” You need Jesus, the gym, and Sunshine! In that order!! Now Please Go. And I did. First I did something for someone else ( secretly) , worked out at the gym, and found some time to enjoy the beautiful day. My anger was obviously long long gone in a short time. My point is I’m human. I mess up. But I try to surround myself with the right people who will help me get back on the right track. It takes work every day to look for the good around us. Today I needed to be reminded of that. I hope you all have a good day. ☀️0
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coolchick207-- I think everyone perceives strength in you as a caregiver and I'm sure you are incredibly strong. But isn't it nice when someone remembers you are still a person and could use a little love and concern yourself? It is worth a million dollars when someone tells you to take care of YOU! That is a wonderful reminder--thank you for sharing--not being a fit person isn't a sign of not doing enough--it is usually a sign of trying to do too much for everyone else. Take care of yourself--you are worth it!1
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TheMom6Girls--I love that message--we are so hard on ourselves--we can't always put on our happy faces and sometimes we just make a mistake! Then we beat ourselves up far longer than the situation calls for. We are all on the same track--we all make mistakes. You are right--together we should be there for each other to help so that the bad day is just that, one bad day before lots of good ones!
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