This pretty much blew me away...secret mom confessions.
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Im not surprised by anything other than the one regarding distraction by technology and gaining weight over IQ points for your kids. That one blows my mind.
But the rest? I can relate to all of them at one point or another in the five years I've had my daughter. Love her to the ends of the world and back...but wow sometimes. Wow.0 -
Wow - I am disturbed! As someone doing her best to get pregnant and have a child I don't know why some other people even bothered to have kids! Don't get me wrong, I know they're hard work - my sister has 5 and I'm a trained childcare professional.. My husband and I have thought long and hard about all the things we'll be giving up to have a child but surely the miracle of creating another human being outweighs all else? I bet a lot of couples who can't have children or have lost a child would give anything for a few sleepless nights or a troublesome car journey }:-(0
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I don't know where in this whole thread anybody said they'd rather have sleep than no kids. Or a peaceful car trip than no kids. Of COURSE we love our kids. I treasure mine more than anything. But you know, I went 3 full years without getting more than 2 hours of sleep at a stretch. Is it really so shocking that I would like a good night's sleep? That I would like some time to myself? Just because children are blessings doesn't mean that parenthood is all sunshine and roses. Most of the time it's awesome. Sometimes it kind of sucks. Times like when your fully vaccinated child somehow caught rotavirus AGAIN and infected the entire family, and you're cleaning up vomit off the couch for the fifteenth time that night, for the third night in a row, and you're in the throes of illness yourself. So yeah, sometimes parents complain. Because like I said earlier, ZOMG, moms are human, just like everybody else!
I do wish you luck with TTC, because it is a wonderful thing having kids. But don't look down on other moms when they complain. That's not fair. Very few moms would actually want to get rid of their kids. But once in a while, we'd like a night without having to worry about them.0 -
The only one that distresses me is medicating a child regularly for long trips. My two are special needs and they get melatonin to HELP them sleep at night, but I have NEVER given them anything to make a trip more bearable for me, and we went through 6 or seven moves (always to another state) by car in 10 years.0
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Ok, yes, some of this is disturbing...but especially the whole missing their old body and time alone that is NOT a bad thing. It doesn't mean they would trade their kid to get their body back to anything, it just means they miss their body. I'm sure that when I have kids I will miss my (now) hot body and I will miss time alone, but that I will love my kids none the less. The one that REALLY got to me is that many would sooner lose 15lbs than raise their kids IQ...that's jacked!0
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I wonder what secret DAD confessions would look like! ;D0
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Some of these totally p*ss me off. Seriously, some people shouldn't be parents.0
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I am guilty of some of these, as I'm sure every parent is. I think it is very sad that people judge parents (I'm sure the children as well) for eating junk food. I believe the more it's restricted/forbidden, the more, I fear, it will be desired, leading to weight problems and other issues further in life. I wish there was an easy answer. Now where did I put my "How to be a perfect parent handbook"?...
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I am guilty of some of these, as I'm sure every parent is. I think it is very sad that people judge parents (I'm sure the children as well) for eating junk food. I believe the more it's restricted/forbidden, the more, I fear, it will be desired, leading to weight problems and other issues further in life. I wish there was an easy answer. Now where did I put my "How to be a perfect parent handbook"?...
I agree and not. I do not judge parents who teach their children about junk food in moderation and if I see someone at McDonald's with their kid I don't know how much the kid eats there so I don't judge. I try not to judge anyone for anything, but I do seriously have a problem with parents who let their children become obese. I know that everyone on here is trying to make healthy life changes and I really commend that so I fear I will probably step on a few toes by saying this. But, as parents we need to teach or kids healthy eating habits, my weight issues have been due to my eating habits but also because I was never taught that putting ranch dressing on your spaghetti probably is a bad idea (though I must say I sometimes still do, I'm a little disgusted with myself as I type this) Since I am currently TTC, I am also working on getting myself to where junk (and processed food in general) is a rarity so that my kids will hopefully pick up the same habits. If my child is obese at 10, I have no one to blame but myself.0 -
none of those surprise me0
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#1.) They Want to Be Left Alone. . Yes. Absolutely
#2.) They're Weird About Seeing Other Women Breastfeeding. - No, I think its lovely
#3.) They Send Their Kids to School Sick. - Guilty. My kids have to be pretty ill before i'll keep them off school. I dont think thats a bad thing. Too many people keep them off for just a sniffle.
#4.) Most of Them Would Like a Do Over. - no not really
4% question their decision to have kids ALTOGETHER . . . errrrr, sometimes if im absolutely honest, but i love them all, but miss my freedom a lot.
#5.) They'd Choose Great Sleep Over Great Sex. Id rather have both
#6.) They're Distracted by Technology. - no worse than being distracted by anything. you cant stand over your kids 24/7
#7.) They Medicate Their Kids More Than You Think.- no i dont, do this
#8.) They Judge Other Moms Constantly. - No worse than i judge anyone.
#9.) They Have a Favorite Child. - Yeah but it changes from day to day. Probably hour to hour
#10.) They Use Their Kids to Get Out of Things. - and? whats the problem here?0 -
I'd say a lot of this is spot on. We're human, our kids can drive us nuts. We still would die for them, and love them to pieces despite that.
Couldn't have said it better myself!0 -
#7.) They Medicate Their Kids More Than You Think. 18% have medicated their child before a long car trip or flight to knock him out . . . and 8% sometimes do it on regular nights at home.
This one is so disturbing to me. I've known parents who do this and I can't stand it! To me, that's a form of child abuse. Medications should be used responsibly and not as a convenience tool to control your child! smilies not working again! Insert mad smiley here.0 -
I don't know where in this whole thread anybody said they'd rather have sleep than no kids. Or a peaceful car trip than no kids. Of COURSE we love our kids. I treasure mine more than anything. But you know, I went 3 full years without getting more than 2 hours of sleep at a stretch. Is it really so shocking that I would like a good night's sleep? That I would like some time to myself? Just because children are blessings doesn't mean that parenthood is all sunshine and roses. Most of the time it's awesome. Sometimes it kind of sucks. Times like when your fully vaccinated child somehow caught rotavirus AGAIN and infected the entire family, and you're cleaning up vomit off the couch for the fifteenth time that night, for the third night in a row, and you're in the throes of illness yourself. So yeah, sometimes parents complain. Because like I said earlier, ZOMG, moms are human, just like everybody else!
I do wish you luck with TTC, because it is a wonderful thing having kids. But don't look down on other moms when they complain. That's not fair. Very few moms would actually want to get rid of their kids. But once in a while, we'd like a night without having to worry about them.
Another fantastic comment! I agree 100%.
Moms don't get sick days. Moms don't get "off" days. You're on call 24/7 and YES, there are times when I desperately wish I could sleep without waking in the middle of the night because someone had a bad dream, or someone doesn't feel good, or someone heard a strange noise. And I often wish I didn't have 2 little eyes staring at me with a binky pressed to my nose at the crack of dawn because in their minds, it's time to get up. But I wouldn't trade it. Not for all the money in the world. And I don't think wanting a little alone time or extra sleep once in awhile makes me a bad mother. It makes me human.0 -
Blew you away? I'm guessing you don't have kids. OR you have a lovely woman who takes care of them. (:
I agree... and the people that are disturbed by this prob dont have kids either.
being a mother is the most rewarding but also the most thankless job!!!!0 -
When we become parents, we don't stop being human beings. I only found a couple of things on that list disturbing (mostly the medicating thing and being grossed out by other women breastfeeding) but most of the other stuff is just being human and having real thoughts. Yes, I absolutely miss alone time and sometimes i get seriously annoyed by my daughter's endless rambling on about nothing. I also love her with my whole heart and would lay down in front of a speeding bus for her. I would dare any parent to honestly say they have never had a single negative thought regarding their children or their lives.0
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There are probably a fair percentage of parents that could be playing with their children right now if they would log off MFP.0
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the alone time is the only thing i miss0
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Snort. Yeah, 'cause volunteering a few hours a week is just like parenting.
Omg this made me snort!
Im surprised they didnt ask more deep questions. Being a parent is tough. No one can prepare you for it and we are all human. I have said things to my kids i wish i didnt but it happens. I have given my kids "sleepy juice" when they were climbing the walls at 11 cause my dumb *kitten* let them have a soda or something in the evening. i have taken my eyes off them before not necessarily for technology just from some kind of distractions.
But one thing is for sure I love my kids with every fiber of my being but for the love of all things designer can i freaking go pee alone for once at my home? Kids are pains in the butt sometimes and they dont give a damn how you feel. They live for the moment. I have to step back sometimes and remember that all they want is to be loved. Which i do.
I have the utmost respect for stay at home parents. I go to work to get away from it all. I know some people say "well you shouldnt have had kids" well youre probably right not all people are meant to be parents. But dont judge someone over their honesty. As long as people dont act on those negative thoughts then whats the problem. Dont tell me that you have never had an ugly thought in your head that afterwards you thought "now thats not cool" and you immediately change your thoughts? Come on now lets be honest here.
BTW i have 2 very well behaved children because we believe in discipline in my house. But kids test the limits like nobody's business. Lawdy! They will work your nerves. So I say spend at least 7 days with someone's kids as a stay at home parent (24/7) then report back to me and let me know if you used generic benadryl or the name brand.0 -
Just because we become parents doesn't mean we stop being full-grown adult human beings. Good grief.0
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sorry, double posted.0
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I don't know where in this whole thread anybody said they'd rather have sleep than no kids. Or a peaceful car trip than no kids. Of COURSE we love our kids. I treasure mine more than anything. But you know, I went 3 full years without getting more than 2 hours of sleep at a stretch. Is it really so shocking that I would like a good night's sleep? That I would like some time to myself? Just because children are blessings doesn't mean that parenthood is all sunshine and roses. Most of the time it's awesome. Sometimes it kind of sucks. Times like when your fully vaccinated child somehow caught rotavirus AGAIN and infected the entire family, and you're cleaning up vomit off the couch for the fifteenth time that night, for the third night in a row, and you're in the throes of illness yourself. So yeah, sometimes parents complain. Because like I said earlier, ZOMG, moms are human, just like everybody else!
I do wish you luck with TTC, because it is a wonderful thing having kids. But don't look down on other moms when they complain. That's not fair. Very few moms would actually want to get rid of their kids. But once in a while, we'd like a night without having to worry about them.
I'm not looking down on other Mum's for being tired or wanting a break, obviously that's only natural...
The specific things that made me angry were people medicating their kids to make them sleep, people preferring their own weight loss ( and not even a large amount!) to their kids intelligencet, people admitting their kids were hurt because they were busy texting or web surfing and people being disgusted about breastfeeding! There's a difference between complaining about your children and wanting some peace and quiet to acting negligibley. Imagine how the parents, or even just the public in general, would react if a nursery nurse or teacher admitted they had let a child get hurt because they weren't paying attention to them or that they'd given them medication to quiet them down!
So sorry if I offended Mum's that are doing their best to be good parents but a lot of people are also quick to assume that if you haven't given birth to a child yourself, you can't have an informed opinion.0 -
Even at that though, you can't watch your kids all the time. Whether you're distracted by your cell phone or by cooking, there are literally dozens of times through the day that you aren't looking at the kids. Should we be spending hours texting or playing Angry Birds? No. But sometimes you get a text from your husband and you answer it, and you look up to find your kid doing something he's not supposed to. It happens to everyone. And I addressed the medicating thing earlier. It's not right, but sometimes people do it on the advice of their pediatricians, their mom, whatever. Sometimes people just really don't know the risks.
I do think it's weird for someone to say she'd rather be thinner than have smarter kids. But it's also a really weird question. The two aren't really comparable. Plus, quite frankly, my kids don't really need to be any smarter. They're pretty smart cookies. :-P
And you absolutely can have an opinion if you don't have kids. You just also need to realize that things look very different when you're in the situation, and that your opinions will probably change when you do have kids. Mine did.0 -
Your last sentence made me smile
It is a wierd question, I guess it's just the idea of people choosing their own vanity over their children that seemed sad. I suppose also miseducation is to blame with the medicating issue, you're right. As for the technology issue of course you can't watch your child every second of the day but I got the impression it was more a case of those who are constantly texting etc rather than interacting with their child. For instance I once saw a young boy and his Mum that I knew from work, sitting nearby me in a cafe and for almost the whole time they were there the mum was on her phone and the child ate his lunch in silence. That made me sad. A few people on here said they had seen much worse working with children and their parents in a hospital and it is hard when you work in childcare and experience people treating their own children in unpleasant ways, I'm not saying everyone is a bad parent or that it isn't normal to have negative thoughts or need some help every now and then, just that some things are not the choices I would make myself. 0 -
Totally agree with about 85% of that!!! The worst is the breast feeding thing! Super gross! This is why I have one daughter and I am completely content with her!
wait? what??
breastfeeding is gross???
what are tits for then? flashing? or social network avatars??
I will never understand how someone can think nurturing their child is "gross"0 -
Snort. Yeah, 'cause volunteering a few hours a week is just like parenting.
Omg this made me snort!
Im surprised they didnt ask more deep questions. Being a parent is tough. No one can prepare you for it and we are all human. I have said things to my kids i wish i didnt but it happens. I have given my kids "sleepy juice" when they were climbing the walls at 11 cause my dumb *kitten* let them have a soda or something in the evening. i have taken my eyes off them before not necessarily for technology just from some kind of distractions.
But one thing is for sure I love my kids with every fiber of my being but for the love of all things designer can i freaking go pee alone for once at my home? Kids are pains in the butt sometimes and they dont give a damn how you feel. They live for the moment. I have to step back sometimes and remember that all they want is to be loved. Which i do.
I have the utmost respect for stay at home parents. I go to work to get away from it all. I know some people say "well you shouldnt have had kids" well youre probably right not all people are meant to be parents. But dont judge someone over their honesty. As long as people dont act on those negative thoughts then whats the problem. Dont tell me that you have never had an ugly thought in your head that afterwards you thought "now thats not cool" and you immediately change your thoughts? Come on now lets be honest here.
BTW i have 2 very well behaved children because we believe in discipline in my house. But kids test the limits like nobody's business. Lawdy! They will work your nerves. So I say spend at least 7 days with someone's kids as a stay at home parent (24/7) then report back to me and let me know if you used generic benadryl or the name brand.
Take it from the father of two super hyper-active boys, you are speaking the truth!
But be careful with the Benadryl, it is (not widely) known to impair cognitive function. There are some alternative aids that are safer than benadryl. (i.e. Calms, Forte.)
Just FYI :-)0 -
It is so funny, when my kids were smaller, all I wanted was some me time, but when I got it, I couldn't wait to get back to them.
The whole thing about breastfeeding is a bit crazy I believe. That is what breast are for, come on. I guess I could understand it a little, since most people find them more as sexual objects instead of what they are really intended for.
The whole drug their child issue is unbelievable. Really!?
But, I did one time almost burn the house down, playing on the computer. My kids never got hurt, but easily could have.
ETA: I was a stay at home mom of 3 less than a year and half between each one. I never gave my children any drug other than what the doctor prescribed, but I did make the foolish mistake of allowing my sister-in-law keep them, about 5 years ago, while I was in the hospital for liver problems, and they told me she gave them Tylenol PM in the mornings to make them go back to sleep once they woke up. Because she would put them to bed a decent time, and stay up all night herself, then when they were ready to get up she wasn't. I will say this, I don't talk to her anymore. I could have rung her nappy headed neck!0 -
Snort. Yeah, 'cause volunteering a few hours a week is just like parenting.
Omg this made me snort!
Im surprised they didnt ask more deep questions. Being a parent is tough. No one can prepare you for it and we are all human. I have said things to my kids i wish i didnt but it happens. I have given my kids "sleepy juice" when they were climbing the walls at 11 cause my dumb *kitten* let them have a soda or something in the evening. i have taken my eyes off them before not necessarily for technology just from some kind of distractions.
But one thing is for sure I love my kids with every fiber of my being but for the love of all things designer can i freaking go pee alone for once at my home? Kids are pains in the butt sometimes and they dont give a damn how you feel. They live for the moment. I have to step back sometimes and remember that all they want is to be loved. Which i do.
I have the utmost respect for stay at home parents. I go to work to get away from it all. I know some people say "well you shouldnt have had kids" well youre probably right not all people are meant to be parents. But dont judge someone over their honesty. As long as people dont act on those negative thoughts then whats the problem. Dont tell me that you have never had an ugly thought in your head that afterwards you thought "now thats not cool" and you immediately change your thoughts? Come on now lets be honest here.
BTW i have 2 very well behaved children because we believe in discipline in my house. But kids test the limits like nobody's business. Lawdy! They will work your nerves. So I say spend at least 7 days with someone's kids as a stay at home parent (24/7) then report back to me and let me know if you used generic benadryl or the name brand.
Take it from the father of two super hyper-active boys, you are speaking the truth!
But be careful with the Benadryl, it is (not widely) known to impair cognitive function. There are some alternative aids that are safer than benadryl. (i.e. Calms, Forte.)
Just FYI :-)
thanks! i will buy some for my sister in gallons! lol
my kids are 5 and 11. they know whats up now. plus im way more laid back now than when they were smaller. you learn dont sweat the small stuff right? Plus if they act crazy they clean toilets. I dont spank my kids i make them do manual labor FOR FREE. Thats right I said it FOR FREE! Toilets, base boards, floors, pooper scoopers, pulling weeds, dusting, you name it.0 -
LOL wow!! I'm a mom and I agree with some of it.0
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i guess to each his own, i'm a mommy of twins turning 3 in september and i love them to death, would not change anything for the world, and i am also preggo with my third peanut
i think breastfeeding is a beautiful thing.... and whenever i need a lone time i tell my hubby n he handles it... everyone needs breaks once in a while, i dont believe in medicating to sleep... to me thats what motherhood is about sacrificing for your children... they won't be able to thank you at this moment but rest assured when they get older and become parents of their own they will understand the hard work and sacrifice of being a parent and will deifnately appreciate all that has been done for them... that's how i felt about my parents when i became a mom just my thoughts.... 0
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