Heavy Drinker - Now Sober - First 3 Months Sobriety Summary

Sorry for this long post - but I thought it might help some others:

I was a functional heavy drinker just 90 days ago. I would drink a 1.75 liter bottle of Jim Beam every 5 days or so – maybe 6 days if I was trying to cut back. I was still very active – running, swimming, cycling, gym, etc. I just made sure I left enough calories each day for me to drink. I do not think I was an alcoholic, but I was definitely starting to flirt with alcoholism.

I had a couple of things show up on a blood test 2 years in a row – so I thought - let’s just eat, drink, and live right for the next 3 months and see if we can clear this up without meds or surgery. So, February 25 was my last drink. Here is a quick summary of what I experienced in the 3 months after my last drink (ALD):

First 10 days ALD – I missed drinking a lot. Falling and staying asleep was hard. Nightmares and very weird & vivid dreams were normal. I could not remember the last time I dreamed when I was drinking heavy either – or if I even did dream. I certainly don’t recall any. I tell all of this to my wife, daily, in order to keep me on track.

About 2 weeks ALD - Starting to sleep like a teenager on a rainy Saturday morning. Wow! Getting tired at night for the first time in years instead of getting buzzed. This was something new. I started losing weight too even though I was eating more. I definitely was eating healthier. Still tempted daily. Still trying to figure out what to do with my evenings during my normal drinking time.

About 1-Month ALD – It is getting easier now and some nagging health issues have started to clear up. My mildly arthritic knees do not hurt as much and a former surgery site is feeling pretty good for the first time in 3 years. Still getting pangs and temptations to resume drinking. I am also arguing in my head all the pro’s and con’s and the con’s are barely winning. Too much free time in the evenings so I signed up for evening softball. I am the oldest player on our team by 25 years. I still tell my wife all of my temptations to keep me on track – but now only have to let her know 2 or 3 times per week.

About 2-Months ALD – It is getting FINALLY easier now. I feel pretty darned good as well. Sleep still amazes me…I love sleeping without a buzz on. This is by far one of the least expected and most enjoyable parts of sobriety for me at this time. I am still wrestling with the desire to drink, but it is maybe weekly now instead of daily or every other day. I still tell my wife all of my drinking temptations to keep me on track.

Today – 3-Months ALD – I am feeling better now than I ever did when I was drinking. I am seriously considering staying on-the-wagon moving forward due to how good I feel. What did I just say??? I am sure being in shape when I started this 3 months ago helps. At last night’s softball game, someone offered me a beer and I passed – but wow – I wanted it bad. Scary!!! I want to control alcohol, not the other way around. I am now down 8 pounds from my start weight ALD. I do not want to lose anymore weight so I am eating luxuriously on occasion (ice cream, deserts, chocolate) all the stuff I refused to eat to allow me to drink heavily.

To my surprise, I am now playing softball for 2 teams and acting as a sub for a 3rd team. I still cycle, swim, and run and I still hate running more than anything in the world – but I like complaining about it even more – so it works out.

Quitting drinking was the right thing for me to do. Next blood test in 2 weeks. Let's see if eating and living right works.
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Replies

  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    That's awesome! Thanks for sharing :)

    When I stopped being a heavy drinker I suddenly developed a sweet tooth, which might have lead to weight gain if I hadn't also increased activity. Just something to be mindful of, especially if you don't replace softball with something else when the season is over.

    Go you!
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    vingogly wrote: »
    Congratulations. I quit alcohol in January 1992 after 20+ years of heavy drinking, when I went into outpatient treatment. For several years I'd think of drinking when I was stressed out or grieving and sometimes dream of it. I'd stay off it by thinking it through: imagining what it would be like drinking, how I would feel after. That's 26 and a half years ago. If I can do it, you can too.

    By the way, the term alcoholic is a label invented by AA, it's not a formal diagnosis in DSM-5. The DSM diagnosis is Alcohol Use Disorder - and there are degrees of disorder: mild, moderate, and severe based on the number of symptoms. I don't call myself an alcoholic or former alcoholic, but I know my life is better without alcohol in it; you're the only one who can decide if that's also the case for you. For me, complete abstinence was the best approach though I now don't have any problem with using alcohol in cooking. The important things are to be self aware, stay committed to your new lifestyle, and don't B.S. yourself (which is easy to do when you have a substance abuse problem). Which are also good things to keep in mind when you're trying to lose weight.

    Hey, thanks. I never wanted to refer to myself as an alcoholic, probably due to AA, and now have another term :)
  • Fitnessmom82
    Fitnessmom82 Posts: 376 Member
    Sorry for this long post - but I thought it might help some others:

    I was a functional heavy drinker just 90 days ago. I would drink a 1.75 liter bottle of Jim Beam every 5 days or so – maybe 6 days if I was trying to cut back. I was still very active – running, swimming, cycling, gym, etc. I just made sure I left enough calories each day for me to drink. I do not think I was an alcoholic, but I was definitely starting to flirt with alcoholism.

    I had a couple of things show up on a blood test 2 years in a row – so I thought - let’s just eat, drink, and live right for the next 3 months and see if we can clear this up without meds or surgery. So, February 25 was my last drink. Here is a quick summary of what I experienced in the 3 months after my last drink (ALD):

    First 10 days ALD – I missed drinking a lot. Falling and staying asleep was hard. Nightmares and very weird & vivid dreams were normal. I could not remember the last time I dreamed when I was drinking heavy either – or if I even did dream. I certainly don’t recall any. I tell all of this to my wife, daily, in order to keep me on track.

    About 2 weeks ALD - Starting to sleep like a teenager on a rainy Saturday morning. Wow! Getting tired at night for the first time in years instead of getting buzzed. This was something new. I started losing weight too even though I was eating more. I definitely was eating healthier. Still tempted daily. Still trying to figure out what to do with my evenings during my normal drinking time.

    About 1-Month ALD – It is getting easier now and some nagging health issues have started to clear up. My mildly arthritic knees do not hurt as much and a former surgery site is feeling pretty good for the first time in 3 years. Still getting pangs and temptations to resume drinking. I am also arguing in my head all the pro’s and con’s and the con’s are barely winning. Too much free time in the evenings so I signed up for evening softball. I am the oldest player on our team by 25 years. I still tell my wife all of my temptations to keep me on track – but now only have to let her know 2 or 3 times per week.

    About 2-Months ALD – It is getting FINALLY easier now. I feel pretty darned good as well. Sleep still amazes me…I love sleeping without a buzz on. This is by far one of the least expected and most enjoyable parts of sobriety for me at this time. I am still wrestling with the desire to drink, but it is maybe weekly now instead of daily or every other day. I still tell my wife all of my drinking temptations to keep me on track.

    Today – 3-Months ALD – I am feeling better now than I ever did when I was drinking. I am seriously considering staying on-the-wagon moving forward due to how good I feel. What did I just say??? I am sure being in shape when I started this 3 months ago helps. At last night’s softball game, someone offered me a beer and I passed – but wow – I wanted it bad. Scary!!! I want to control alcohol, not the other way around. I am now down 8 pounds from my start weight ALD. I do not want to lose anymore weight so I am eating luxuriously on occasion (ice cream, deserts, chocolate) all the stuff I refused to eat to allow me to drink heavily.

    To my surprise, I am now playing softball for 2 teams and acting as a sub for a 3rd team. I still cycle, swim, and run and I still hate running more than anything in the world – but I like complaining about it even more – so it works out.

    Quitting drinking was the right thing for me to do. Next blood test in 2 weeks. Let's see if eating and living right works.

    Awesome job!! You should be very proud of yourself. I come from a family where heavy drinking has been the norm for as many generations back as I can remember. It's not an easy habit to kick! I was fortunate enough to only dabble in heavy drinking in my teens. Now it's just the occasional glass of wine. Keep up the great work!
  • L1zardQueen
    L1zardQueen Posts: 8,753 Member
    Congratulations! Thanks for posting.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    kshama2001 wrote: »

    Hey, thanks. I never wanted to refer to myself as an alcoholic, probably due to AA, and now have another term :)

    Yeah, being an alcoholic has so many bad connotations. I guess I am just a drunk.
  • AllSpiceNice
    AllSpiceNice Posts: 120 Member
    Congrats Tweaking_time! Not an easy thing to do. Thank you for sharing your experiences during the past 3 months, especially how it effected your sleep. I gave up drinking during the week when I noticed it might help me fall asleep initially, but on those nights I would frequently wake up in the middle of the night and have bad quality of sleep overall.

    Best wishes as you continue your journey!

  • kcn2bluesky
    kcn2bluesky Posts: 187 Member
    @Tweaking_Time Congrats on your accomplishment! Great job! I stopped drinking any alcohol in January of this year and my life has improved significantly in many way because of it.

    Not sure if you have seen it, or are interested, but there is a thread going each month relating to drinking less alcohol. The group is wonderful, non-judgemental, and I found them to be an extremely helpful resource in the early days of January when I stopped all alcohol. If you pop in to the current month thread, I know they would love to hear your story!

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10663704/less-alcohol-may-2018-one-day-at-a-time

  • MelanieCN77
    MelanieCN77 Posts: 4,047 Member
    kshama2001 wrote: »
    That's awesome! Thanks for sharing :)

    When I stopped being a heavy drinker I suddenly developed a sweet tooth, which might have lead to weight gain if I hadn't also increased activity. Just something to be mindful of, especially if you don't replace softball with something else when the season is over.

    Go you!

    Oh this happened to me too - I never put the two things together. I used to joke that after eating a sandwich, instead of dessert I'd prefer another sandwich. Now I'm all about icecream and caked and pudding at night.

    OP - nice job! My drink habit got interrupted a year ago by an international trip where the time difference made it so I was so not ready to drink in the evenings where I was. I would drink 2-3 12oz IPAs and 3oz whisky most nights, within my cals when dieting - that's a lot of exercise to make that room. These days I go weeks without a drink and 99% of the times I do imbibe I either regret or feel like I might as easily not have bothered. I hear you on the sleep, getting in bed with a book and falling asleep at 10.30 is my new normal, where before I'd be up late nursing my bourbon like it was a project.
  • Tweaking_Time
    Tweaking_Time Posts: 733 Member
    Thnx @kcn2bluesky ...I will check it out
  • 76Crane76
    76Crane76 Posts: 133 Member
    Excellent! I am so happy for you...hope you have continued success.
  • Thediamond13
    Thediamond13 Posts: 46 Member
    I just hit 3 years sober on May 23rd. When I checked into detox I was skinny/fat at only 110lbs. I was drinking quite a bit by that point. (1/2 gal tequila every 3 days).

    After I quit I had a crazy sweet tooth which overtime has lessened but not gone away completely. Since quitting I have been gaining weight steadily until my recent doctors appointment when I realized I weighed 170lbs!

    However, I don’t think I could’ve tackled healthy eating and calorie tracking right out of the gate. I have joined different gyms in the last few years but my work schedule makes it very difficult.

    Anyways, Congratulations on getting sober!!

    The no drinking sweet tooth is real
  • vingogly
    vingogly Posts: 1,785 Member
    The no drinking sweet tooth is real

    I ate a pint of ice cream every day for a year after I quit drinking. There's a reference to the sweet tooth in the movie Clean and Sober -- when Michael Keaton meets with his sponsor at a restaurant, they end up with a big pile of ice cream dishes on the table.
  • vingogly
    vingogly Posts: 1,785 Member
    Think long and hard before you label yourself (or anyone else) as an "alcoholic" or a "drunk". You tend to become what you tell yourself you are.

    https://www.cchrint.org/psychiatric-disorders/psychiatric-labels-are-the-problem/
  • CarvedTones
    CarvedTones Posts: 2,340 Member
    vingogly wrote: »
    Think long and hard before you label yourself (or anyone else) as an "alcoholic" or a "drunk". You tend to become what you tell yourself you are.

    https://www.cchrint.org/psychiatric-disorders/psychiatric-labels-are-the-problem/

    I do have an issue with substance abuse, but I think I can be someone who just doesn't drink and not worry about it anymore. 11 months in, that hasn't completely happened yet; I had to worry about it a lot to start with and less frequently as time has passed but still the occasional urge. Between those urges I don't give it much thought unless I come across a discussion or if I am going to be in a situation with a high potential for urges and easy access to alcohol. I know AA members who haven't had a drink in 20 years and are still all about being an alcoholic, going to a couple of meetings a week. They seem ti have beat the problem long ago but still let it define them.
  • dsboohead
    dsboohead Posts: 1,899 Member
    Wow!!! What incredible people from different opinions of alcohol dependent situation. Whatever you call it....you are beating it and It makes me smile. Food sort of has the same mechanics doesn't It! Brave and literate folks in regards to this issue.....thankyou for the education!
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    vingogly wrote: »
    Think long and hard before you label yourself (or anyone else) as an "alcoholic" or a "drunk". You tend to become what you tell yourself you are.

    https://www.cchrint.org/psychiatric-disorders/psychiatric-labels-are-the-problem/

    Yes, that was part of it too. So I say things like "I abused alcohol" rather than "I am (or I was) an alcoholic".
  • CarvedTones
    CarvedTones Posts: 2,340 Member
    I do realize I am prone to substance abuse even though I haven't abused anything for over 11 months. My regular doctor knows that opioids are bad and made a note in my chart (at my request) and my psychiatrist switched me to strattera instead of adderall for ADHD (at my request) and also made a note in my chart (no stimulants). I won't let it define me, but I will keep my guard up. Keeping away from alcohol is all on me, of course; I can't tell anyone not to prescribe it. I don't need a label or frequent meetings; I just need to be someone who doesn't drink.
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
    Congrats Tweaking_time! Not an easy thing to do. Thank you for sharing your experiences during the past 3 months, especially how it effected your sleep. I gave up drinking during the week when I noticed it might help me fall asleep initially, but on those nights I would frequently wake up in the middle of the night and have bad quality of sleep overall.

    Best wishes as you continue your journey!
    If you have an apple watch, download Autosleep. It was a HUGE eye opener for me.
    When I have a few glasses of wine my heart rate all night is a full TEN POINTS higher and I have ZERO minutes of deep sleep.

  • JLatham325
    JLatham325 Posts: 105 Member
    I totally get the sweet tooth @kshama2001 ...Got them myself.

    Love dark chocolate now...but still only have a little each day.

    I forgot to add to my long message above that I no longer swear each and every morning while in the shower that "today I am going to quit", or "no more", or "not another drop" because I felt so freaking lousy. I usually felt bad for about an hour or so - at most. The shower, coffee and a big breakfast always made me feel better. But at least 1/2 of my morning shower was just letting the water run over me hoping to feel better and knowing exactly why I was feeling the way I did and swearing off the liquor. I would have such resolve when I would leave the house for work. By 5:00 PM, the liquor demons would have used their logic on me, my resolve to quit will have vanished - poof - like a burp in the breeze - and by 8:00 PM I would have my well established bourbon buzz going.

    this REALLY hit home for me. During the week, while I'm at work I'm all "I'm not drinking this weekend, want to lose weight, I want to have more energy, alcohol does not serve these goals".... and then next thing I know after doing my evening commute I'm swinging through the liquor store for my wine etc because "I've had a long stressful week, I deserve it, I'll do better tomorrow" .. it irritates me how well I can justify ANYTHING, especially my lack of willpower :(
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    JLatham325 wrote: »
    I totally get the sweet tooth @kshama2001 ...Got them myself.

    Love dark chocolate now...but still only have a little each day.

    I forgot to add to my long message above that I no longer swear each and every morning while in the shower that "today I am going to quit", or "no more", or "not another drop" because I felt so freaking lousy. I usually felt bad for about an hour or so - at most. The shower, coffee and a big breakfast always made me feel better. But at least 1/2 of my morning shower was just letting the water run over me hoping to feel better and knowing exactly why I was feeling the way I did and swearing off the liquor. I would have such resolve when I would leave the house for work. By 5:00 PM, the liquor demons would have used their logic on me, my resolve to quit will have vanished - poof - like a burp in the breeze - and by 8:00 PM I would have my well established bourbon buzz going.

    this REALLY hit home for me. During the week, while I'm at work I'm all "I'm not drinking this weekend, want to lose weight, I want to have more energy, alcohol does not serve these goals".... and then next thing I know after doing my evening commute I'm swinging through the liquor store for my wine etc because "I've had a long stressful week, I deserve it, I'll do better tomorrow" .. it irritates me how well I can justify ANYTHING, especially my lack of willpower :(

    @JLatham325 Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is really useful for learning how to identify the voice that makes statements like "I've had a long stressful week, I deserve it, I'll do better tomorrow" and shutting it down. I've heard it called the Addictive Voice, Sabotaging Voice, and BEAST. This works for food as well as alcohol and drugs.
  • rk544
    rk544 Posts: 4 Member
    Thank you for sharing! I've been sober 17 years - it gets easier, but the struggle has never completely gone away. Some days I would sell my soul for one drink. I totally shifted my addiction to food, and am still working on being "sober" from that too. And the quit-drinking-sweet-tooth is 100% real!!
  • mbaker566
    mbaker566 Posts: 11,233 Member
    edited June 2018
    vingogly wrote: »
    Think long and hard before you label yourself (or anyone else) as an "alcoholic" or a "drunk". You tend to become what you tell yourself you are.

    https://www.cchrint.org/psychiatric-disorders/psychiatric-labels-are-the-problem/

    I do have an issue with substance abuse, but I think I can be someone who just doesn't drink and not worry about it anymore. 11 months in, that hasn't completely happened yet; I had to worry about it a lot to start with and less frequently as time has passed but still the occasional urge. Between those urges I don't give it much thought unless I come across a discussion or if I am going to be in a situation with a high potential for urges and easy access to alcohol. I know AA members who haven't had a drink in 20 years and are still all about being an alcoholic, going to a couple of meetings a week. They seem ti have beat the problem long ago but still let it define them.

    tangent: it isn't a problem. it is a disorder or disease. my doctor preferred to call it a disorder because there is no cure but death.
    in the big book, they describe lots of drinkers and they define what an alcoholic is. if you aren't an alcoholic, then don't worry about AA. it wasn't meant for you anyways.
    the solution to their problem is something that they feel must be addressed every day. because if they don't, they end up dead like so many of my friends who went dry including my husband. recovered/recovering has always been a hot topic. in the book, it says you will recover.

    I'm not an alcoholic. but i know many 12 steppers and many non12 steppers. well versed in different views of alcoholism-alcohol abusers-substance abusers.

    sweet tooth....likely because of the sugars from the alcohol your body is no longer getting. think about how much sugar is in beer. and many people go cold turkey. your body wants sugar. SUGAR!!!! :wink:

    OP: congratulations. it's a great accomplishment and one many haven't been able to accomplish. I hope whatever route you end up going, you do so successfully :smiley:
  • Jennloella
    Jennloella Posts: 2,286 Member
    Great job, I hope you come back and update your lab work, I'm curious what/how much can be turned around in 90 days!