My date with the person above me was going great until...

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  • Beardfarmss
    Beardfarmss Posts: 780 Member
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    She never got handsy with me
  • hud54014
    hud54014 Posts: 3,777 Member
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    I offered to use my feet because my hands were busy holding tacos, or to use my feet to hold the tacos so I could be handsy. You should have seen the look on his face... Sheesh
  • Beardfarmss
    Beardfarmss Posts: 780 Member
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    We were kicked out of the restaurant after they saw her twisting my nipples with her toes
  • NewChapterInMyLife
    NewChapterInMyLife Posts: 757 Member
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    He sharted and got embarassed and left and stuck me with the tab.
  • dunkind45
    dunkind45 Posts: 110 Member
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    I got jealous because she ran into someone better looking than me and then she pretty much just hopped in a luxury car to never be seen by me again
  • Egger29
    Egger29 Posts: 14,741 Member
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    I realized she mis-spelled her nickname. DRUNKind45 doesn't know her limits!
  • Cutemesoon
    Cutemesoon Posts: 2,646 Member
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    His wife showed up and asked me to be their surrogate. #Yikes
  • cdlee05mfp
    cdlee05mfp Posts: 1,139 Member
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    she swiped left on me as i was sitting right there
  • Cutemesoon
    Cutemesoon Posts: 2,646 Member
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    LOL. What did you do to make me swipe left while you were in front of me? :grimace:
  • princess0lexi
    princess0lexi Posts: 3,938 Member
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    online profile said it was a guy but it turned out to be a woman
  • gymboy666
    gymboy666 Posts: 76 Member
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    she ate the flowers I brought her
  • Cutemesoon
    Cutemesoon Posts: 2,646 Member
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    He took off his hat. He lied about his balding.
  • Beardfarmss
    Beardfarmss Posts: 780 Member
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    I thoughts she was checking out my butt but it was my wallet she was after
  • Cutemesoon
    Cutemesoon Posts: 2,646 Member
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    It was only because your wallet was more interesting! Its not my fault you don't squat nor deadlift. :disappointed:
  • Beardfarmss
    Beardfarmss Posts: 780 Member
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    Cutemesoon wrote: »
    It was only because your wallet was more interesting! Its not my fault you don't squat nor deadlift. :disappointed:

    You love pancakes...why can't you love a pancake butt too.

  • PrincessVamp666
    PrincessVamp666 Posts: 1,176 Member
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    I actually expected a beard farm
  • Cutemesoon
    Cutemesoon Posts: 2,646 Member
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    Beardfarmss wrote: »
    Cutemesoon wrote: »
    It was only because your wallet was more interesting! Its not my fault you don't squat nor deadlift. :disappointed:

    You love pancakes...why can't you love a pancake butt too.

    I. Just. CAN'T! I don't like guys who look like this....


    j4nirtmu06g5.jpg
  • Crochetmama84
    Crochetmama84 Posts: 224 Member
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    When i told her i am bi and kept getting FR from every guy thats reading this. Lol.

    Dont...just dont..
  • Egger29
    Egger29 Posts: 14,741 Member
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    She told me I wasn't cute enough soon enough.
  • Cutemesoon
    Cutemesoon Posts: 2,646 Member
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    He told me that he doesn't take off his spiderman shirt not even during a shower. Weird.

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