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He wants to gain, I want to lose. How can I make meals for that meet both of our needs??
kkell2017
Posts: 7 Member
So basically, my husband has been going to the gym, eating more calories, mass gainer etc, and he wants to gain weight (healthy weight). Meanwhile I am trying to lose weight. This makes it difficult sometime for me when I want to cook dinner and the recipes I use is mainly low calorie, low carb etc. I know it doesn’t bother him, but I also want him to reach his goals as well as I want to reach mine.
Does any one have any tips, advice or thoughts on how I can make this work for both of our goals?
Thanks in advance!
Does any one have any tips, advice or thoughts on how I can make this work for both of our goals?
Thanks in advance!
0
Replies
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Just give him bigger portions.
I have crockpot meals there are pretty low cal that everyone in the family loves. I eat one serving, my SO eats 2-3 and my kids typically eat 2. Everyone basically is eating the portion size of the dish that best fits their individual needs.7 -
Easy, bigger portions for him, smaller for you.6
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Just take a page from hobbits and feed him second dinner (kind of like second breakfast). Essentially a second plate he can heat up two hours later.5
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My husband and I seem to be on opposite cut/bulk cycles. It’s not that hard to manage. We eat breakfast and lunch separately because of our schedules already with the exclusion of one weekend brunch. Brunch is a big family thing once a week so we don’t stress on it and just adjust snack and dinner calories around it.
For dinner we always have a starch, veg, and protein. Whoever is cutting usually goes small or skips the starch completely. Whoever is bulking gets double protein and enjoys the starch. We don’t worry about the veggies unless it’s a salad night and the person cutting will typically skip dressing or just do a little vinegar. There’s no need for different menus, just modify how you serve it.6 -
The problem with that is, he doesn’t have a “big” stomach. He can eat much bigger portions, because he gets full and if he over eats then he feels sick.musicfan68 wrote: »Easy, bigger portions for him, smaller for you.
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This is my boyfriend and I! A lot of it just comes down to portion control for us. I load up on the veggies, while he tends to grab, well, a lot of everything!
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It’s hard for him to eat a lot of extra portions. He works nights and doesn’t have access to a microwave to reheat, and if he eats to much at once he feels sick (over eating). He doesn’t have a “big” stomach.
He is trying so hard to gain, and it’s just not happening.0 -
Can you make two versions of your dinner? So add extra oil or butter for better fats on his veggies or whatever, but keep yours lighter? Sometimes my boyfriend and I do this. He'll butter a bun (or I'll skip the bun altogether), or he'll add a bit of extra butter on his veggies.
Maybe just talk to him about how you can work in more calories (that are good), but without overdoing it with butter, or whole milk, or whatever the ingredient is?4 -
Make him an extra side of his favorite. I would recommend something on the higher carb side. He is going to need about half his calories from carbs preferably if he is bulking.4
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Can you make two versions of your dinner? So add extra oil or butter for better fats on his veggies or whatever, but keep yours lighter? Sometimes my boyfriend and I do this. He'll butter a bun (or I'll skip the bun altogether), or he'll add a bit of extra butter on his veggies.
Maybe just talk to him about how you can work in more calories (that are good), but without overdoing it with butter, or whole milk, or whatever the ingredient is?
I’ll definitely talk to him and see what he thinks, this would definitely be something that could help!1 -
Make him an extra side of his favorite. I would recommend something on the higher carb side. He is going to need about half his calories from carbs preferably if he is bulking.
He has definitely upped his carb intake at lunch! It’s hard at dinner depending on what I cook, but I could add it to just his!0 -
My husband and I have vastly different calorie goals. It's not a problem, though, because we only share one meal. We eat the same thing for dinner, and he gets all his extra calories from breakfast, lunch and snacks. Unless you are sharing all of your meals together, it shouldn't be that big of a deal. Since he doesn't like big portions anyway, he can just eat what you have for dinner and add extra meals throughout the day.4
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snacks5
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The problem with that is, he doesn’t have a “big” stomach. He can eat much bigger portions, because he gets full and if he over eats then he feels sick.musicfan68 wrote: »Easy, bigger portions for him, smaller for you.
If it was just a question of straight calories, he could add calorically dense foods such as salad dressing, nuts, or avocado on his salad, cheese, or butter. But he still probably needs more protein to gain muscle than a smaller woman needs while eating at a deficit.
Are there different proteins which he might find easier to double up on without feeling stuffed? Can he get in a couple servings as a snack without involving you, such as a shake?2 -
Mass gainers (can) provide a lot of calories in addition to protein.... Snacks are good for increasing calories too.
I would assume your common meals already include protein and veggies etc and that he can consume the quantities of these nutritious items that he needs.
He doesn't need a huge surplus if he is trying for a lean bulk.1 -
Don’t do anything ... make meals as you would normally do and let him fill in the gaps
I ate more calories in snacks yesterday than I did in my 3 main meals, 40g of cheese - 160kcal, heavy cream in coffee, nuts, coated nuts, nut granola... it adds up in minutes8 -
The problem with that is, he doesn’t have a “big” stomach. He can eat much bigger portions, because he gets full and if he over eats then he feels sick.musicfan68 wrote: »Easy, bigger portions for him, smaller for you.
Can he not eat snacks between meals then? That can add a lot of calories. This really is not that hard.8 -
If he can't he large meals he'll need to eat more often or more calorie dense foods.
I'm sure you don't eat every meal together right? Probably dinner, which can easily be exactly the same food with a bigger portion of protein for him, and maybe breakfast.
Two separate breakfast isn't a hassle really. Say you both wanted omelette you could have yours with whites, spinach and mushroom. His could have the extra yolks, heavy cream, butter and bacon. (an extreme example)
Out side of that he could have a heavy lunch plus calorie dense snacks.
PS Maybe tell him to figure some of this out himself. It's his bulk10 -
We have the same problem. I'm trying to gain and my fiance is trying to lose. I normally have bigger portions when we eat the same meal. When im in work i eat a lot of calorie dense foods, like nuts, peanut butter, eggs, whole milk etc. I also eat pasta for carbs and drink fruit juices. We buy full fat milk and semi and stick to our own bottle, ill drink the same amount but mines full fat for more calories, same with things like yoghurt.3
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My husband has much more cheese than I do and he will have rice or pasta where I will have vegetables. He will have roast potato and I will have roasted zucchini, cauliflower, brussel sprouts. He will have larger serving sizes. Basically, the fat (except cheese) and protein component of a meal will be the same with both meals but the carbs may be different and this is not a huge amount of extra effort on my behalf. He is also responsible for his own breakfast and lunch.1
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