Avoiding eating disorder

Hi everyone,

I have a question which has been on my mind for a while.
I have been on mfp for a few years on and off, and I personally and luckily never had an eating disorder. I am just wondering if obsessively sticking to this plan (and the calories mfp is giving me) might eventually lead to one in some people and I'd like to hear your opinions on this issue.

I am using MFP and Fitbit. I eat all my Fitbit calories back, mostly because I actually feel like I need them. MFP gives me 1200 calories per day, and that doesn't seem nearly enough for me and I actually go hungry (even if I cut out the crap like chocolate, alcohol, eating out too often etc.). I can fairly happily function on around 1600 a day (I normally move enough to earn the extra 400 as well).
By eating my calories back, I obviously don't see as much and as quick a change as I'd like and have gotten frustrated and given up a few times, but I find it necessary to do this to have a fairly normal life.
I read that a lot of people weigh their food, some even in restaurants, and while I'm sure this does lead to a greater success I am worried that if I start doing this, I will get so obsessed with every gram I eat that it might spiral out of control.
It just worries me when I really get into MFP and start losing weight that I suddenly start fearing social occasions (there is at leats one a week, and I have dropped out of some purely because I knew I would have dinner out or a drink or two) and almost resentful when people invite us out, or cook us dinner, but only because that day is then a write off in my head diet wise and I feel guilty and like a failure. Does anyone get tis and ow do you deal with it?
I'm just wondering what your ways of leading a balanced life are without getting obsessed. Are there any tricks? Do any of you for example stick to the calories in the week and do "maintenance" weekends? Does this work for some of you?
I'm just worried because yes, I do want to lose a few kilos and get back to the weight I felt most happy with, but I also am worried about getting too obsessed and missing out on life while doing this.

Thanks so much!
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Replies

  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,421 Member
    edited October 2018
    oooohhh. I love that infographic, it needs to go in the infographic thread.

    Except...is there an "e" in binging/bingeing? I never know.
  • phoebe112476
    phoebe112476 Posts: 269 Member
    I do not believe I have an eating disorder, but do get caught up knowing where to draw the line between accuracy and living my life. I have been logging daily since 8/4 and have lost 20 of my goal 75 pounds. Bought a food scale a few weeks ago due to the multiple comments about needing to be more accurate as a person gets closer to their goal. Cooking a recipe from platejoy last night. I am supposed to eat 25% of the total cooked. I carefully measured each item as I made the recipe. Now I am getting another dish out to tare the scale to weigh the total meal so I know I can eat 334g of this dish. Then I am making sure it is mixed well so my portion is representative of the total. Is this what others do? My three teen girls are watching me do this. I want to make sure they also witness this as healthy and not obsessive. Do this make sense?
  • heybales
    heybales Posts: 18,842 Member
    So many trust the MFP eating goal (even though they may have not selected the correct non-exercise activity level and kinda know it).

    But then as soon as they enter a workout and that eating goal changes - confusion results and doubt and no longer trusting MFP.
    Even though they had no idea how the 1200 was reached but was willing to accept it - suddenly they don't know why the goal increased but no longer willing to meet it.

    I kinda believe those few that say MFP worked correctly for them using all the numbers given - may indeed have selected activity level lower than reality, may indeed have selected a weight loss rate higher than reasonable - but then their inaccurate food logging and eating back potentially inflated workout calories prevented them from eating too little and the resulting adapting by their body to slow down their daily burn.

    And you indeed did that recipe correctly for getting calories - in theory.
    You say measured, but calories is per gram, weight, not volume measurements.
    Did you weigh the ingredients as they went in? won't appear obsessive since that's the means of getting the right amount of ingredients.
  • mom23mangos
    mom23mangos Posts: 3,069 Member
    As you've seen from the comments above, it varies greatly by the individual with the majority of the people having no issues whatsoever. I've never had an eating disorder and have no mental health issues that I know of, but I found myself slipping down a rabbit hole of obsessiveness that to me was starting to border on disordered thinking so I stopped logging. I did it gradually by logging 6 out of 7 days at first, then just during the week and not on the weekends and then completely stopping. I'm still mindful about what I eat, but it's worked out well for me. But if I ever wanted to lose weight again, I would start logging again.
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,741 Member
    mitch16 wrote: »
    I think it helps to be aware of tendencies and your mental status. I have a history of eating disorders dating on/off back to the 80's. I've been here since 2009. I know that I have the ability to get sucked in and obsessive about eating/exercising so I'm pretty careful about paying attention to the signs of falling down the rabbit hole. I know when to back off. I only wear a fitbit when I am in the middle of a fitness challenge for my health insurance. I wear a Garmin when I do my purposeful exercise--mostly for the mapping aspects of it (and Strava--I turn my obsession into winning QOMs). Although I log everyday and am on a monster streak, I do not weigh every single morsel of food that I put in my mouth--I feel that this is too triggering. I am just mindful about what I eat/how much I eat and make smart choices as much as possible.

    I'm sorry I don't have a better answer about "tricks" to avoid it, but knowing yourself is the best trick I can think of...

    Not to derail the thread, but I've recently started using Strava. What are QOM's, please?
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,259 Member
    edited October 2018
    kshama2001 wrote: »
    Chronic under-eating can trigger disordered eating.

    And large, as a percentage of TDEE, deficits, especially as they progressively exceed ~20% of TDEE, also increase the risk of ed ideation when applied to individuals with energy reserves commensurate to being "normal weight".

    Many people spontaneously and sufficiently recover with more normalized eating, others don't.

    As a leaner person, I would look at losing at a higher average intake than 1200. I would also look into structured re-feeds and diet breaks as they might help you achieve faster and better overall results.

    I am sure there is a re-feed and diet break thread somewhere :lol: (it is referenced in the stickied posts at the top of the forum. The basics of what you need to know have now been incorporated in the re-edited first post of the diet break thread)
  • aokoye
    aokoye Posts: 3,495 Member
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    mitch16 wrote: »
    I think it helps to be aware of tendencies and your mental status. I have a history of eating disorders dating on/off back to the 80's. I've been here since 2009. I know that I have the ability to get sucked in and obsessive about eating/exercising so I'm pretty careful about paying attention to the signs of falling down the rabbit hole. I know when to back off. I only wear a fitbit when I am in the middle of a fitness challenge for my health insurance. I wear a Garmin when I do my purposeful exercise--mostly for the mapping aspects of it (and Strava--I turn my obsession into winning QOMs). Although I log everyday and am on a monster streak, I do not weigh every single morsel of food that I put in my mouth--I feel that this is too triggering. I am just mindful about what I eat/how much I eat and make smart choices as much as possible.

    I'm sorry I don't have a better answer about "tricks" to avoid it, but knowing yourself is the best trick I can think of...

    Not to derail the thread, but I've recently started using Strava. What are QOM's, please?

    QOM = queen of the mountain
  • CCgal2018
    CCgal2018 Posts: 64 Member
    I will preface this by saying Im on the beginning of my journey and have only been tracking for a few weeks. But here is what I’ve noticed so far.... I personally noticed my eating was leaning more towards disordered when I had my calories set super low. I upped it about 200/day and have since done better. Most days I naturally eat below this higher threshold anyway. However, the extra calories allowance made a HUGE mental difference. I stopped obsessing over having a few bites of this or that. Even if my progress is slower, it’s more sustainable and less mentally taxing.

    I agree with the idea to look at the numbers as a management system rather than a personal failing. I love the baking analogy. Most 1st world people are eating double portions of food. Measuring food into healthy portions is not the culprit for most people. Eat out and enjoy your social interactions! Balance high cal days with low cal days.

    Also, a question... are you overdoing it with steady state cardio? Are you incorporating any resistance training or short sessions of HIIT cardio? I’ve read (and experienced) that excessive/long cardio sessions can create ravenous hunger. If this is what you are doing, try upping your calories by 1-200 and replacing some cardio with resistance training or HIIT.

    Don’t be afraid to experiment with higher calories and different workouts to find what works for you. Personally, my mesomorph body type is having better success with higher calories dedicated to protein intake combined with 4 days of HIIT calisthenics and only 2 days of moderate intensity steady state cardio.

    Also, focus in on your goal. What do you really want- quick loss of a few pounds or sustainable lifestyle choices?

    In summary, if you are bordering on disordered mentality or thinking of giving up, your body is probably needing a change from the routine you have developed. Experiment with calories, macro ratios & workouts until you find a good fit.

    Best of luck!!
  • CCgal2018
    CCgal2018 Posts: 64 Member
    @snickerscharlie thank you for the correction! This is what I love about these forums, that we can all learn from each other. I got my info from someone who I thought was a well respected trainer. I should have gone a little further down the google rabbit hole :)
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    There are pretty specific guidelines to diagnosing an eating disorder, weighing food isn't one of them. While it may seem that some people take extreme measures to stick to their calorie goals, it's not necessarily a symptom of ED
  • perkymommy
    perkymommy Posts: 1,642 Member
    edited October 2018
    I've had an ED and you know when you have one. I got so thin that I didn't realize it at the time. When I was in my

    late teens I was in the 60-70 lb range. When I was 40 years old I weighed 99 lbs. Now I'm 50 and can't seem to

    lose a pound and stuck at 155ish. I hate it. I'd rather be around 125-130 for a realistic goal but I'm very short

    (under 5ft) so I'm huge right now. But when stuck in my lowest weights throughout life I never saw myself as "too

    thin" and could not eat enough to gain to save my life. I just couldn't do it. I didn't want to be that thin but at the

    same time couldn't gain anything. Any time I did gain I was pregnant and could always lose back down after the

    baby was born. But you know when you have an eating disorder. You really do. At that point it feels good to be

    really hungry all day and not eat more than a few crackers or some lettuce.
  • My_Butt
    My_Butt Posts: 2,300 Member
    perkymommy wrote: »
    I've had an ED and you know when you have one. I got so thin that I didn't realize it at the time. When I was in my

    late teens I was in the 60-70 lb range. When I was 40 years old I weighed 99 lbs. Now I'm 50 and can't seem to

    lose a pound and stuck at 155ish. I hate it. I'd rather be around 125-130 for a realistic goal but I'm very short

    (under 5ft) so I'm huge right now. But when stuck in my lowest weights throughout life I never saw myself as "too

    thin" and could not eat enough to gain to save my life. I just couldn't do it. I didn't want to be that thin but at the

    same time couldn't gain anything. Any time I did gain I was pregnant and could always lose back down after the

    baby was born. But you know when you have an eating disorder. You really do. At that point it feels good to be

    really hungry all day and not eat more than a few crackers or some lettuce.



    The first two sentences seem contradictory, I suspect because the first sentence is wrong.
    If you had an ED, according to you, you must have known that you had it, so how could you not realize that you were thin?
    I believe it is very common to deny (= not know, not admit, not recognize) that you have an ED while you have it, just as it with many psychological issues.

    I thought the same since she never really talked about ‘dieting’ until the last sentence, and assumed she was only talking about being ‘naturally’ thin.

    But I think what she means is that, you know you have disordered eating, but mixed with body dysmorphia, you don’t realize you’re thin.

    Like in my case, I know I have an ED because I would get rid of my food after every single time I ate. But with an unnatural goal weight I’m seeking, I couldn’t see my bones in the mirror; I’d only focus on a small piece of love handle, or fixate on my chubby looking knees.
    So I was diagnosed with an ED, and I knew my behaviors weren’t normal, but I never thought I was sick enough for help, or to be taken seriously by a treatment team.
  • r0ck3rgirl
    r0ck3rgirl Posts: 67 Member
    sportynad9 wrote: »
    Hi everyone,

    I have a question which has been on my mind for a while.
    I have been on mfp for a few years on and off, and I personally and luckily never had an eating disorder. I am just wondering if obsessively sticking to this plan (and the calories mfp is giving me) might eventually lead to one in some people and I'd like to hear your opinions on this issue.

    I am using MFP and Fitbit. I eat all my Fitbit calories back, mostly because I actually feel like I need them. MFP gives me 1200 calories per day, and that doesn't seem nearly enough for me and I actually go hungry (even if I cut out the crap like chocolate, alcohol, eating out too often etc.). I can fairly happily function on around 1600 a day (I normally move enough to earn the extra 400 as well).
    By eating my calories back, I obviously don't see as much and as quick a change as I'd like and have gotten frustrated and given up a few times, but I find it necessary to do this to have a fairly normal life.
    I read that a lot of people weigh their food, some even in restaurants, and while I'm sure this does lead to a greater success I am worried that if I start doing this, I will get so obsessed with every gram I eat that it might spiral out of control.
    It just worries me when I really get into MFP and start losing weight that I suddenly start fearing social occasions (there is at leats one a week, and I have dropped out of some purely because I knew I would have dinner out or a drink or two) and almost resentful when people invite us out, or cook us dinner, but only because that day is then a write off in my head diet wise and I feel guilty and like a failure. Does anyone get tis and ow do you deal with it?
    I'm just wondering what your ways of leading a balanced life are without getting obsessed. Are there any tricks? Do any of you for example stick to the calories in the week and do "maintenance" weekends? Does this work for some of you?
    I'm just worried because yes, I do want to lose a few kilos and get back to the weight I felt most happy with, but I also am worried about getting too obsessed and missing out on life while doing this.

    Thanks so much!

    Eating disorders begin with body dysmorphia. If you see something different to what everyone else sees then it may be time to see a doctor.
  • mkculs
    mkculs Posts: 316 Member
    We all know that eating out or eating meals fixed by others means losing some control over the calorie counting. There is nothing wrong with that—as long as you develop healthy mechanisms for dealing with it. Becoming anxious or fearful and feeling guilty are not particularly healthy mechanism, esp if they contribute to “giving up.” Having said that, in and of themselves, those emotions are not evidence of an eating disorder. We often feel bad about ourselves when we perceive ourselves to have “failed” in some ways. An eating disorder includes not only body dysmorphia, but also behaviors that are both unhealthy and dangerous bc of the extremes to which they go.

    At some point, we all have to decide just how much the number on the scale and/or the way we look actually matters. I’m pretty sure I won’t be able to sustain a 1350 maintenance level ( which my goal weight and age will give me), so I’ll have to decide whether to exercise more or accept a few more pounds than I’d like—accepting, really, that my desired goal weight may not be realistic for me. Maybe that is where you are, OP. If your current weight is healthy and you can maintain it, perhaps those “few more kilos” aren’t realistic for where you are in life right now. Once I retire, I can see myself working out more and maybe getting to a lower weight, but I’ll make those decisions when I’ll there.

    The bottom line is that if the number on the scale keeps you pretty healthy, a lower number might not be worth the lifestyle changes you have to make to get there. Be ok with that.

  • lottieouroboros
    lottieouroboros Posts: 15 Member
    I know what you mean. I don't have an eating disorder but I think I could potentially if I didn't keep checking in with how I feel about food and watching how my mental health is. I currently estimate calories (I don't weight food, I estimate to the best of my ability) and I deliberately don't weigh food because I think this would lead to me having too much control, if that makes sense. My best advice is to up your calories, honestly. I started on 1,200 and would binge A LOT to the point where i was barely losing anything. If you up your calories to 1,500 (and eat back your calories) you'll hopefully be able to train yourself to snack during the day without binge eating. I went from undereating at 1,200 and not seeing any progress to eating at around 1,700 (with my steps/movement all logged, I have a fitbit now) and I've been losing weight much more evenly. I also don't get the urge to binge eat at all anymore, really! Obviously everyone is different so I'm not saying this is the only way to run your weight loss, but maybe try increasing your calories and seeing how that goes!

    Another thing to consider is making sure you're tracking exercise as accurately as possible – being super accurate with food is only worth it if your exercise is just as precise. I've found I always assume I've done far more exercise than I actually have.