Mean girls

sarahlucindac
sarahlucindac Posts: 235 Member
edited November 29 in Health and Weight Loss
I wore “business casual” clothes to work today instead of my hospital scrubs which are waaaaaay too big for me now.
I got a lot of mixed reactions. Some people were normal about it like “oh hey, you look great!” but there were a few girls that treated me differently. I couldn’t figure out why it seemed like they were upset with me until I saw one of them looking me up and down.
Looks like I’ll be going back to being the bag lady in my over-sized scrubs. I can’t deal with people treating me so weird. Ugh. I’m still me, dammit :(
Have others experienced similar things? I really didn’t anticipate the girls at work to go sideways on me.
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Replies

  • hikinggal11
    hikinggal11 Posts: 59 Member
    mean people suck...just ignore them.
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,463 Member
    edited October 2018
    Don't hide your success because of other people's ignorance.

    PS I see lots of scrubs at Goodwill.
  • Fflpnari
    Fflpnari Posts: 975 Member
    edited October 2018
    Every time I lose weight people say so many things that it is enough to fall off the wagon and have it run me over. don't listen. to them. Honestly most are jealous. I 2nd the goodwill for scrubs. I have found name brand tops with tags for 3.99 and pants (no tags but looked like they were never worn) FOR 5.99. I tend to go clearance at scrub shops but that is still pretty expensive.
  • fatmonsters
    fatmonsters Posts: 30 Member
    I have received the same exact response (treating odd, looking me up and down) in response to them noticing recent weight loss- not by men but just women (and ones I am related to no less!). Anyway, it is what it is and I believe you. People who are healthy will be proud of you; those who feel insecure about themselves may react negatively but it is an obvious tell as to how they feel about themselves. At the end of the day hopefully seeing your transformation will encourage them to make changes. I had the same reaction you did when i encountered it and it made me feel very insecure. But I thought about it, kept working to my goals, and I am feeling really confident about my achievements now. Don’t let anyone put you in a negative headspace. Feel good about yourself.
  • 777Gemma888
    777Gemma888 Posts: 9,578 Member
    Don't validate them.
  • _aenyeweddien_
    _aenyeweddien_ Posts: 102 Member
    I work in the hospital myself and unfortunately, it's full of mean girls:( I don't know if it's the case of too many women in one place getting all ''cliquey'', but every single hospital I worked at was the same.

    Personally I used to love wearing scrubs, they're so comfy!:D What matters is that you feel good in what you wear, don't pay any attention to silly jealous people, you can't keep everyone else happy. It's important that you feel good and comfortable.

    BTW, as for the scrubs, If they are too big, isn't the hospital supposed to supply the size that fits you? In UK you can have whatever size you want/whenever you want
  • snowflake954
    snowflake954 Posts: 8,399 Member
    People generally like a "status quo". When something changes they check it out--that's just human. You decide what you want to wear. They'll get used to it pretty fast.
  • funjen1972
    funjen1972 Posts: 949 Member
    Unfortunately, the better you look, the more mean girls there are. It's just jealousy.

    We are supposed to build each other up and celebrate successes, not drag each other down!

    This weekend I had a mean girl tell my date she wanted to be with him and treated me absolutely nasty. Jealous *itch. She is a model and thought she could win him over with pure sex and slut. Lol I have brains and a personality and my own...everything. Her only recourse was to drag me down to look better to him. Those mean girls are trying to supress the wonderful that you are so they can feel better. Take it as a compliment.
  • Evelyn_Gorfram
    Evelyn_Gorfram Posts: 706 Member
    Hospitals are required to provide properly standardized scrubs for operating room personnel. For non-operating room positions that call for scrubs, it varies. I think a lot of US hospitals provide a "scrub allowance" - extra money you can put in for that covers the cost of new scrubs (often around 4 or 5 sets/year).

    If OP is changing sizes fast enough that she already bought smaller scrubs earlier this year, she may have been trying to make do with those now-oversized scrubs until January 1. (But I am not OP, so I could be way off base. ;) )

    OP, are the Mean Girls at your work overweight themselves?

    Before I started losing weight, I often felt everything having to do with weight loss and skinny people as a personal reproach. For example, if my skinny sister got a no-whip iced coffee with skim milk at Starbucks and I ordered the Death-By-Caramel-Heart-Attack Frappuccino, I felt like everyone in the place was staring at our orders and thinking "No wonder she's so fat." (In reality, they probably weren't looking at us at all, and were most likely too busy thinking about their own lives and concerns to worry about some stranger's coffee order.) It could be that your coworkers were feeling something like that.

    BTW, although I have never worked in the medical profession, I love scrubs for comfy working-around-the-house-wear. I get them cheap from thrift stores and on Poshmark.
  • fitoverfortymom
    fitoverfortymom Posts: 3,452 Member
    I definitely remember the bag lady stage. It's hard to spend money on new things when you know you're just going to have to buy everything again.

    I spent (and still do spend) a lot of time at thrift/consignment stores so I can still feel good at my current size while I work toward smaller sizes. Maybe think about investing a little in a few pieces at your current size.

    And you're right, comments about your weight loss are rarely actually about YOU--they are usually a reflection of the commenter. Sometimes people just don't know how to acknowledge something that they know have changed. I know when I see someone who has lost weight, I don't even know the best way to acknowledge it. I typically go with something like, "You look so awesome!"
  • hesn92
    hesn92 Posts: 5,966 Member
    edited October 2018
    I don't know what your job is, but from reading your post it sounds like it could just be that it was odd for you to be wearing business casual instead of your normal scrubs. Don't let what you think those girls were thinking about dictate what you do or what you wear, because in all likelihood, it's all in your head. If it's more appropriate for you to wear scrubs to work, maybe you should go buy a couple that actually fit.

    ETA I just read your update and it does sound like maybe that girl was a little jealous. I still don't think you should wear oversized scrubs because of that. Wear what you are comfortable in. I would not be comfortable in clothes that fit me 47 lbs ago
  • bikecheryl
    bikecheryl Posts: 1,432 Member
    Geesh..... life is too short to let what you think others are thinking bother you.... You've done amazing !

    And it was probably just a shock to them...... seriously, peoples memories are short .... give it a week or two or three and life goes on and they will have forgotten the "old" you. ;)
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,600 Member
    sarahlucindac wrote: »
    Wow, thanks for all of the great responses, guys!
    To answer some questions: we are allowed to wear business casual or scrubs (I work the front desk at an animal hospital). All of the girls at the front wear either things from time to time- yesterday was my first time switching it up. The hospital is privately owned and does not provide an allowance for scrubs. I haven’t purchased any new scrubs during the time that I’ve been losing weight (down 47 lbs since March) and I don’t plan on making that investment until I reach my goal (only 13 lbs left before goal).
    I do believe that some of the weird treatment was due to my weight loss- one person even said “I can’t even see you when you turn sideways” but it was said in a weird tone, not friendly and supportive. Some of the girls are a little heavy.
    With all that being said, I think the main thing I got from all of your responses was this: I shouldn’t assume their behavior was about me. Maybe they were having a hard day and I took the treatment personally. I’m just in new territory and feeling a little uncomfortable.
    I think I’ll go back to the bag lady look for a little while, just until I reach my goal and can afford new scrubs (wearing business casual was probably too bold of a reveal, lol).
    I’ll kill ‘em all with kindness and I’m sure in the end it’ll all work out. Thanks for all the support as I tread these new and unfamiliar waters ☺️

    That's a better plan: No need to change your behavior based on what you think others are thinking (which tends to set one up for emotional whiplash! ;) ).

    I especially like your "kill 'em with kindness", take-the-high-road plan: It's the best revenge, and tends to confuse the mean people (who'll be wondering what you're thinking ;) . . . bless their hearts.).
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    sarahlucindac wrote: »
    Wow, thanks for all of the great responses, guys!
    To answer some questions: we are allowed to wear business casual or scrubs (I work the front desk at an animal hospital). All of the girls at the front wear either things from time to time- yesterday was my first time switching it up. The hospital is privately owned and does not provide an allowance for scrubs. I haven’t purchased any new scrubs during the time that I’ve been losing weight (down 47 lbs since March) and I don’t plan on making that investment until I reach my goal (only 13 lbs left before goal).
    I do believe that some of the weird treatment was due to my weight loss- one person even said “I can’t even see you when you turn sideways” but it was said in a weird tone, not friendly and supportive. Some of the girls are a little heavy.
    With all that being said, I think the main thing I got from all of your responses was this: I shouldn’t assume their behavior was about me. Maybe they were having a hard day and I took the treatment personally. I’m just in new territory and feeling a little uncomfortable.
    I think I’ll go back to the bag lady look for a little while, just until I reach my goal and can afford new scrubs (wearing business casual was probably too bold of a reveal, lol).
    I’ll kill ‘em all with kindness and I’m sure in the end it’ll all work out. Thanks for all the support as I tread these new and unfamiliar waters ☺️

    You should wear clothes you feel good in that fit you and let others work out their own feelings. If they continue to make comments about your body you can just tell them to stop and that they are being inappropriate and unprofessional.

    You could buy some scrubs that will probably fit you now and at your goal. I don't imagine your size in scrubs will be that vastly different after another 13 lbs.
    You could get your clothes altered. You could check a thrift store for clothes.
  • LiLee2018
    LiLee2018 Posts: 1,389 Member
    Do not let their stank attitudes dictate how you dress/act. Let them look you up and down. Just look them directly in the eyes and give them your biggest smile and say "Yeah.. I know I look good. And walk that healthy *kitten* away giving them a good view of what their jealous selves wish they could have.
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