Mean girls

sarahlucindac wrote: »

Wow, thanks for all of the great responses, guys!
To answer some questions: we are allowed to wear business casual or scrubs (I work the front desk at an animal hospital). All of the girls at the front wear either things from time to time- yesterday was my first time switching it up. The hospital is privately owned and does not provide an allowance for scrubs. I haven’t purchased any new scrubs during the time that I’ve been losing weight (down 47 lbs since March) and I don’t plan on making that investment until I reach my goal (only 13 lbs left before goal).
I do believe that some of the weird treatment was due to my weight loss- one person even said “I can’t even see you when you turn sideways” but it was said in a weird tone, not friendly and supportive. Some of the girls are a little heavy.
With all that being said, I think the main thing I got from all of your responses was this: I shouldn’t assume their behavior was about me. Maybe they were having a hard day and I took the treatment personally. I’m just in new territory and feeling a little uncomfortable.
I think I’ll go back to the bag lady look for a little while, just until I reach my goal and can afford new scrubs (wearing business casual was probably too bold of a reveal, lol).
I’ll kill ‘em all with kindness and I’m sure in the end it’ll all work out. Thanks for all the support as I tread these new and unfamiliar waters ☺️

You've lost 47 pounds!!! Woot!
And you're a mere 13lbs from goal! Wooty woot woot!


Now that I've said the truly important stuff:

Yeah, if I were the "a little bit heavy" heavy coworker who said, “I can’t even see you when you turn sideways,” that would have been all about me. It would have been code for, "OMG, you've lost all that weight and you used to be heavier than/nearly as heavy as me, and if you can lose weight like that then that just means I really ought be able to lose my weight too, and that just makes me feel even more guilty and miserable about my weight than I already did."

And killing them with kindness is a great idea. It tends to help foster good working relationships and makes you seem like a nice person, but you also get to passive-aggressively dominate the Moral High Ground.

A good killing-with-kindness response to hypothetical coworker me above would be some sort of of compliment: "Hey, did you get a new haircut or something? Your hair looks extra nice today," or "Say, you did a really well with handling that (you can probably think of something, right?)."


A thing to consider is that your rate of weight loss may slow as you get even closer to your goal. If so, you may not want to feel like you're stuck with your old bag-lady scrubs at the same time that you're sweating out that last 5 or 10 lbs. Once you've lost 3 to 5 more lbs, a new set of scrubs that are a tad snug then and will be a tad loose at goal might be a worthy investment.

Scrubs honestly aren't that expensive. I'm not trying to judge your budget, but where I live you can usually find them at Goodwill for a few dollars. Maybe one or 2 sets to tide you over until you hit your goal weight would help you to feel better.

sarahlucindac wrote: »

(wearing business casual was probably too bold of a reveal, lol).

Personally, I'd go with something even bolder.

Live your own life, don't live theirs.

I have found that most people aren’t jealous, they are struggling. That’s something we all can relate to, I’m sure. When I understood that, it was easier to meet clumsy, judgemental comments with kindness.