Living with negative comments...
maronesax1972
Posts: 272 Member
I have people making jokes about my weight loss and fitness, telling me I’ll blow away in a light breeze, and am too skinny, etc. Very annoying, especially when I’m not even talking about my fitness journey much to anyone. Guess it’s something i have to live with. Anyhow, I’m proud of my accomplishments. Down 35lbs and BF down 7pts. 
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Replies
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What I see is hard work and dedication, congratulations! You look great! There will always be a selective few, who will use back handed compliments to acknowledge ones transformation. I’d say, your work speaks for itself and such comments are only bringing mockery to themselves.14
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The 'norm' 50 years ago was slender (more normal weight) people. If you don't believe me watch some old TV game or dance shows. Rarely do you see someone overweight on them. Today the 'norm' is larger, so when you get down to a lower weight than what 'normal' is today, people see it as too small and unhealthy. Also I think they are trying in some weird way to pay you a compliment, but you know when you get thinner/healthier, people start to feel bad about themselves and they don't like that feeling. I think you look awesome and a much more healthy weight. Blow it off, say 'thanks, I've been working hard to be healthier', smile and strut your stuff!
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Wow, I think you look amazing! It sucks that being overweight is normal now and people seem to always think those at a healthy weight look too "skinny".7
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I think it's a comparison thing. The longer you were overweight, the more likely people are to react this way. I've lost 48 pounds that I gained over a 5-year period, so I wasn't really at my highest weight all that long. I don't get these comments at all (despite being a healthy BMI and quite obviously smaller than, well, just about everyone, thanks in part to being short).
I assume they were thinking the opposite for a while and just not saying it - 'My God, you've gotten fat!' (read as Edna from The Incredibles
)
Great accomplishment! You should be proud
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People hate change no matter how they may act. The same people who were constantly telling me I should lose weight are the same ones saying I should stop now that I'm close to my goal. I honestly think a lot of people don't like seeing others succeed. Sad as it is.
Anyways dude you look amazing! Be proud of yourself and realize that secretly most of the people hating on you wish they could do what you've done. I know I wish I looked like that with my shirt off11 -
I'd just blow them off and know that they really need to work on deeper issues like compassion and manners. Trust me, your journey is a lot easier than theirs and you are so far ahead of them. You look great!4
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FistGrenade wrote: »People hate change no matter how they may act. The same people who were constantly telling me I should lose weight are the same ones saying I should stop now that I'm close to my goal. I honestly think a lot of people don't like seeing others succeed. Sad as it is.
Anyways dude you look amazing! Be proud of yourself and realize that secretly most of the people hating on you wish they could do what you've done. I know I wish I looked like that with my shirt off
Same. That’s when I took a moment and thought “good thing I’m now on a journey in accomplishing specific goals”. 😁
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I don't think most people making comments like that believe they are annoying you; I think they believe they are complimenting you. And like someone else said, if you were overweight a long time, they are not used to seeing you slim and fit, and apparently they don't know how else to express that. You are hardly going to blow away in the wind, of course, but you look like you put a lot of work into getting fit! Great job!5
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You SHOULD be proud! You look fantastic!
I suppose you do just need to ignore the comments, but I suspect they will taper off in time, as people get used to what you look like now.5 -
You look amazing, great job!!!3
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I'm sure the comments will stop once people are used to you being smaller.
You look great! 4 -
Thanks for the positive feedback. Sometimes I question myself when I here the comments. I feel great so that should be what counts the most. Will look to ignore the neysayers.6
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Don’t question yourself because of negative people. What matters most is YOUR opinion and how you feel. You look awesome by the way!! Congrats on achieving your goals!1
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You look great! Some people just always need to say something. All you can do is ignore them. It’s aggravating, though.1
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You look amazing! Unfortunately sometimes people need to say those types of things to make themselves feel better about their own situation- even if they don't realize they are doing so. Congrats on all your hard work!5
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New here and stopped to read your post. 1st, you look amazing! 2nd people have comments when you are overweight as well as when you lose weight. Now that you look phenomenal, it's some obvious jealous people saying you will blow away. Keep it up. You have just encouraged me.2
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You are not too thin! You are a healthy thin!
People really do hate change even when its none of their biz!1 -
I suspect, as someone else has said, people are trying to pay you a compliment and resort to banter and whilst I cover their own awkwardness. I suggest you smile along with them and take the comments with a pinch of salt. You look fit and lean and not the slightest bit as though you are going to be blown away - congratulations on your great health and fitness1
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You look great and nobody can take away your satisfaction. Keep marching forward.3
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I also think it is meant as a compliment...so many posts here about people being mad that someone comments on their weight loss. Be grateful that it is not acceptable for people to say--"wow--you sure have packed on the pounds" or something like that when you were overweight. You do look amazing.1
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The people making those comments probably saw you fully clothed so have not seen the hard work you are achieving with the weights. Good job by the way! Just tell them you are not dieting but eating healthy then they will usually revisit their own eating habits. Stay focused and carry on. 🤗2
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You look fantastic!
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I think a lot of it is what people are used to seeing. I was overweight for a long time and borderline obese. I got a lot of those kind of comments when I first lost weight. 5.5 years later, people actually forget that I was overweight and they're used to seeing me the way I am now.
Just the other day I was outside with a colleague chatting...I was wearing a jacket and he was wearing a short sleeve polo. He was like, "are you cold or what?" I said, "yeah...I don't have the insulation." He asked me if I was making a "fat joke" (he's pretty overweight). I said, "no...I used to be bigger remember? I never used to get cold." He was like, "oh yeah...you did used to be pretty big hug?"8 -
It's unfortunate that so many feel it's acceptable to comment and project their own bias onto others. The perception of "normal" or "healthy" weight/shape has shifted so much that many don't know what to consider an appropriate size for people any more. I went from 195+ to ~165 lbs before senior year of high school and got even leaner to finish out my freshman year of college. Visiting high school teachers after that semester I had more than a few express concern that I was or had been ill despite being at a healthy weight for a sustained period for the first time in my life.
You look excellent, btw. Don't let anyone try to make you think otherwise.4 -
Great job! You look great. People always find something to complain about. Keep up the great work.3
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maronesax1972 wrote: »I have people making jokes about my weight loss and fitness, telling me I’ll blow away in a light breeze, and am too skinny, etc. Very annoying, especially when I’m not even talking about my fitness journey much to anyone. Guess it’s something i have to live with. Anyhow, I’m proud of my accomplishments. Down 35lbs and BF down 7pts.
You don't look skinny to me-you look in good shape and strong. Are these people "out of shape by any chance?
Just keep concentrating on yourself mate. Keep up the good work.2 -
Not to quote a singer or anything buuut... haters gonna hate... hate hate.. hate hate.
I feel like there are going to be naysayers at every point of your journey. If you feel good about yourself (which you should, you look great), then that is what matters. if people worked on themselves as much as they criticize others, we would all live on a nicer planet.3 -
I look at the person that gives me negaitve feedback are they overweight? Then it might be something they personally struggle with and might be unconsiously jealous.
Is it a relative? They might truly be concerned and/or if overweight they also struggle with this.
Is it a fit person? Then I might look at myself/bmi etc and just make sure I wasn't loosing too much (although you look great!) just to double check myself image.
Sometimes it's a weird compliment.
I personally have a trainer and I trust him and when I reach my goal weight I will use him as my shield - "I work with a trainer and he's happy with the weight I'm at, thank you for your concern though" something to that effect:)1 -
mountainmare wrote: »I also think it is meant as a compliment...so many posts here about people being mad that someone comments on their weight loss. Be grateful that it is not acceptable for people to say--"wow--you sure have packed on the pounds" or something like that when you were overweight. You do look amazing.
@mountainmare You've got a point, but it is acceptable in my work place to say to people they've put on weight. You sound like people shouldn't complain when complimented. I grin and bear it but every time someone comments I want to punch them. One or two comments a day would be ok, but it's more like 15 separate comments every day for the past 3 months. On one bad day I got 62 comments. The comments make me feel incredibly self conscious because obviously people are looking at my body enough to notice. There is one rule at my house for my homestay student - no mention of weight is allowed. I need my house to be a safe space. The comments are making it difficult to keep eating due to self-consciousness.2 -
In the end, you have to know who you are and what is true. No one should believe what they're told. Believe what you know and see.1
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