Heartbroken but fighting back
dianepenelope
Posts: 18 Member
Recently (8 months ago) my husband of 18 years left me citing "I'm just not physically attracted to you" as the reason. I was and continue to be gutted. He has now moved on with another woman and I am stuggling. I started comfort eating, and the weight I lost during the early part of the separation have crept back on. So I am back here, looking for supports, offering support to anyone going through a similar situation or who has triumphed in similar circumstances.
Di
Di
28
Replies
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Three years ago my marriage ended, together a similar time to you. You'll recover, you'll (re)discover you, and you will be happy again5
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Sorry if i might sound a bit abrupt but stop digging yourself in a hole and use this situation as fuel!
Which ever reason he had, he is gone now and being miserable over him won't help you - erase negativity and move on, you win or you learn out of each situation, the choice is yours!2 -
This.Sorry if i might sound a bit abrupt but stop digging yourself in a hole and use this situation as fuel!
Which ever reason he had, he is gone now and being miserable over him won't help you - erase negativity and move on, you win or you learn out of each situation, the choice is yours!1 -
It hurts and it will for a long time but this is a chance for you to work on you.2
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Feel free to add me. X1
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*kitten* him! Happy to add you
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We live in such a selfish world. Being physically attracted should come from loving the person you are not what you look like. Move on and be assured that you are a beautiful person whatever you weigh. My heart aches for the hurt he caused you but I am also sure that you don't need such a self-centered person by your side. Lose weight because you deserve to be happy and healthy not because of him.4
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He's foolish. You are a beautiful woman. It'll take time for the hurt to pass but you'll come out stronger and more confident. Then you'll find the right guy who will love you for the person you are, not just how you look.3
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Hey to support you...sorry you’re going through this but you will bounce back stronger etc🤗1
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Try and console your self with the knowledge that his new partner has to wonder how long before he'll leave her for the same reason. If she isn't wondering that, well, maybe that says more about how strong you are in comparison. Do you really want a weak partner?1
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Hugs. You're beautiful and he's a selfish butt. You're good, girl. You can do this!3
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People suck! But life must go on! Do what you need to for yourself. You will get through this, it just takes time and distraction. Working out is the perfect fit!2
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Sadly there are certain types of men who are slef fulfilling and always know how to manipulate ppl to get what they want. Ask yourself "were there times when you questioned how self obsessed he was?" If its any consolation i was told i was below average looking and well simply to big to be with . These kind of guys have a way of making you feel like its your fault that they are behaving like a "douche" bag, maybe once again self serving them to believe they aren't such horrible human beings.
I agree use the hurt to fuel yourself on making yourself a better version of you but dont fall into the trap of believing it was anything to do with you , this is on him and his most likely upcoming mid life crisis. 😆😆
I personally think he must have issues with his sight because your pic is gorgeous!! The phrase blind as a bat comes to mind.
Keep it together, these are the times that test you, are you gonna make it or break?
Xx3 -
I feel your pain, im currently going through a divorce and its tough, real tough. But if I could give one bit of advice it would be to be selfish. Look after you. Do things that you want to do and what you would enjoy. Improve yourself and learn new things, try new things. I know its difficult but use this as a new start a positive start.3
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I feel your pain, im currently going through a divorce and its tough, real tough. But if I could give one bit of advice it would be to be selfish. Look after you. Do things that you want to do and what you would enjoy. Improve yourself and learn new things, try new things. I know its difficult but use this as a new start a positive start.
100 percent agree! Do you for once.!2 -
Went though it myself in 2012. I am much better off now and as most have said, I used the trauma of the divorce as fuel.2
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OK late late rely but I am doing much better, had a few non started relationships, but they were to prove I wasn't ugly and I still "had it". I've proven that, and now I am taking time for me. My daughter finished high school and is now in uni, no thanks to douche bag dad, and I'm focussing on what matters, my happiness.9
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dianepenelope wrote: »OK late late rely but I am doing much better, had a few non started relationships, but they were to prove I wasn't ugly and I still "had it". I've proven that, and now I am taking time for me. My daughter finished high school and is now in uni, no thanks to douche bag dad, and I'm focussing on what matters, my happiness.
Good to hear you are doing well! I didn’t see this post the first time around, just wanted to say I think you are lovely and it’s his loss. You’ve got great bone structure!2 -
All good advice, take them and make yourself both mentally, physically and emotionally strong
Personally, I would not enter into any relationship until I find the real me, what I really want out of this life and live by myself for a while
Yes, lonely is not good, but just think, if you want to eat cereal for breakfast, lunch and dinner, you have no one to moan about it.
One good piece of advice I would give you is to learn to travel as a single person - after the pandemic of course
I love going places by myself - packing my suitcase and travelling off somewhere, having a nice king size bed, large shower etc - it's a wonderful feeling.
Sitting in a restaurant by yourself or in the movies or going to a show and doing what you want without having to consider someone else. I am in a relationship and do these all the times, just to know that if anything happens I do not need someone to travel etc with.
Good luck
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His loss - You are super cute too btw! This is now your time. Be kind to yourself - pamper yourself.
There are some incredibly supportive, awesome people on this site - so you've come to right place!
The world is your oyster! Rock it girl😉3 -
Sorry to hear this! Keep your head up and from what I see he is not a very intelligent man‼️1
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His loss, for sure! You've got this ❤1
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You now have a chance to FOCUS on yourself and make your life how YOU want it to be. Keep your head high, your spirits high and you WILL get through it. Anyone that can say something like that to their partner is not worth it anyway. Stay strong and don’t sell yourself short.0
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