How did you stop sabotaging yourself?
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Poisonedpawn78 wrote: »CurlyGirl_OnKeto wrote: »I am with you girl! I have quit evvvvvverything. I am finally sticking to Keto. What I decided was that I was going to commit to three months. Commit to myself for three months. No matter what. I was going to stick with it for three months and at the end of three months decide if I was going to stick with it. Decide you're worth it!
And what happens after the three months and you decide keto is not for you. Or the next fad diet..do you plan on just eating the way you did before which got you to the point of being unhappy?
I would suggest stop looking at it as a diet and learn to have the foods you like in the proper proportions for your goals. Be it lose weight, Maintain or gain. Then you never have quitting problems ever again.
Perhaps the three months has to do with people being more successful in reaching goals when there is a specific time frame involved. What's wrong with breaking long term goals down into smaller, manageable chunks? If she's happy at the end of three months, she'll likely keep going with it. If not, she'll continue to utilize the parts she likes, and ditch the stuff that isn't working for her, while she continues on towards her goals. There's an entire spectrum of options other than just going back to habits that led to weight gain.
And what happens when she reaches her goal? the point is that looking at it and labeling it in time frames shows that its a temporary thing. Not the kind of change that is truly necessary. Getting to your goal is 10% or less of the battle. Staying there is FAR harder and MUCH longer(hopefully).2 -
I had to finally accept that I needed to change my way of living forever, not just for a period of time. Being diagnosed with type 2 diabetes was my motivation, but the real change was accepting that I will never be able to eat all the food I want unless I want to be overweight and unhealthy. For the rest of my life, I need to eat only the food my body needs, no more than that.
There's nothing wrong with keto, or indeed most diets, IF they help you to eat only the food you need without feeling desperate. The trick is to find a way of eating which will work forever. For me, that means limiting carbs to about 150g daily, mostly eating lean meats and food I prepare myself at home with a minimum of added "stuff," and then running and lifting a lot to earn enough calories and keep my glucose down enough to have a big old mess of French fries, peanuts, pasta, and other high calorie foods three times a week. I'm down 125 lbs and maintaining eight months so far with this approach (also, my blood glucose numbers are great). It works FOR ME. You need to find what works for you. But the first step is to stop thinking of it as temporary.2 -
For those of you who are talking about it as a "lifestyle" - can you explain what you mean?
I choose to eat, exercise and sleep (the there elements most important to a healthy lifestyle fo me) in a way that I know I can sustain forever. That means that it will not end when I get to a specific number on the scale or size of jeans ... it is forever.
This is not the fastest way to lose "x" pounds, but it does mean an end to yoyo dieting.7 -
Firstly, accept that there is going to be some trial and error - the key, however, will be to not let it get out of hand! If you are going to try something new, give it a timeline to see if it will work for you - long term. If, after a few weeks, you are finding it unsustainable, try some modifications and see if that helps.
You need to figure out what works for you, your responses to food, and your own natural eating patterns. It may not be what's popular, it may not be trendy, or maybe it will be. The ultimate goal, however, is to find a way of approaching food and eating that stop the gains, and can help you lose.
As an example, for me, I landed on my own variation of "IF" (although I never really have a "fasting period" - hence it being my own variation). I examined my lifestyle, eating habits, and natural eating patterns, what I was and was not willing to give up, and started doing things that way.
If I want to lose an appreciable amount of weight, I still have to count calories and track my food and stay in my range, but I find it MUCH easier to do this with my current eating plan, and it's something that works for ALL of my life, and is something that I can sustain long term. This wouldn't work for everyone, and it's not really a "fad" or "popular" "diet plan" but it works for me, and is sustainable.
You're going to need to find that for yourself. Examine your life, your needs, and your natural tendancies, and work to come up with a plan that works for YOU.1 -
What helped me? I started out 80 pounds ago, I have 40 to lose still, so far so good!
-Eating enough protien,
-Using spices so my food is more interesting. (tonight is crab sandwiches!)
-Having a day off once every 2-3 weeks....but I STILL log all my calories from that day off
-Eating home cooked food 85-90% of the time. I do go out, but eat in moderation when I do
-This is not a diet for me, it's a life change, as I never EVER want to be big again1 -
whatalazyidiot wrote: »I used MFP like 10 years ago when I first lost weight (60 lbs in like 4 months). And for some reason now, it is soooo much more difficult. I have NO idea why my brain can't just stick to calorie counting and exercise, and be done with it.
Whoa. That's mega. I managed to maintain that rate for 1 month (15lbs in a month) before I plateaued and fell back into bad habits.
Reading the rest of this thread, it sounds like we've both sprinted a bit too much and need to slow down and try to form more sustainable long term habits.
Increasing the daily allowance seems like a good shout, so there's still space for the occasional chocolate bar
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I can only tell you that self-sabbotage comes easy to me as well. So the first thing I've had to do was tell myself what I said when I quit smoking:
YOU'VE COME THIS FAR, DON'T STOP NOW! Applying it to weight loss:
-then you have to start all over again and go through all the pain associated with starting
-then you have to deal with whatever new damage you've done to your body
-then you have to figure out how to fit your now bulging bod into the smaller clothes you bought
But I'm also doing something quite different this go around. I'm not following any of the fad diets. If I have to toss out an enormous amount of food to be on it, I don't go on it. When I tried KETO they said to toss out the carbs around the house. I must have thrown out more than $150.00 in pasta, wheat, rice, potato stuff... you get the idea.
That would have been a grocery bill for a small family and, since most of it was open, I couldn't give it away.
When the doctor put me on low sodium, it wasn't a big loss to get rid of things higher in sodium than I could eat. Giving away unopened jars and cans and unused frozen meals was easy. And I didn't have that much anyway. Maybe about $10 worth?
My biggest sodium faux pas was salting the food as cooking and after cooking. Easy enough to stop that habit, actually.
So maybe you should think about not following a "diet" per se, in terms of the fads going around and start thinking "Moderation In All Things?"
Just a thought.
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whatalazyidiot wrote: »I used MFP like 10 years ago when I first lost weight (60 lbs in like 4 months). And for some reason now, it is soooo much more difficult. I have NO idea why my brain can't just stick to calorie counting and exercise, and be done with it.
Whoa. That's mega. I managed to maintain that rate for 1 month (15lbs in a month) before I plateaued and fell back into bad habits.
Reading the rest of this thread, it sounds like we've both sprinted a bit too much and need to slow down and try to form more sustainable long term habits.
Increasing the daily allowance seems like a good shout, so there's still space for the occasional chocolate bar
For sure.. sprinting is definitely a bad habit of mine. I go from 0 to 100 instantly. Moderation isn't exactly my strong suit lol. I remember when I got to 199 lbs, which was a BIG deal, I basically just sabotaged myself from there. Super dumb. But it wasn't healthy and it wouldn't have been sustainable anyway.
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For those of you who are talking about it as a "lifestyle" - can you explain what you mean?
I lost weight once before and gained it all back because I couldn't/didn't sustain the habits that led to my weight loss. This time around is different. Every time I have made a decision about exercise or eating habits I have asked myself if I am willing to continue this for the next twenty years. If the answer is no, I look for different choices that will lead to the same desired outcome.
A quick example: I cannot understand how some folks get up almost every day at 4-5 AM and exercise. I would never do that for extended periods. I took a good look at my work schedule. I get up twice a week at 5:00AM to exercise. I'll do that twice a week... I exercise after work on twice a week. Then I fit in exercise on the weekend whenever it suits me. Friday is always a rest day. This works for me and is sustainable.7 -
I'm not there yet, but I'm discovering how important it is to deal with whatever emotional issues cause me to overeat in the first place.6
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I really don't know what clicked with me. About 3 months into something just changed. Don't get me wrong, I still have a burger and some cookies, but I stay in my calorie limit and have somehow taught myself to thinking 'is this really worth it?' ALso, its extremely important to just not give up. Bad days, bad weeks, a whole bad month - count the loss and keep going.6
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whatalazyidiot wrote: »Dont diet! Make a sustainable meal plan.
I personally eat IIFYM. So I have ice cream, steak, potatoes, salads, eggs, Whatever I want but it fits in my calories. I eat a higher amount. Setting to lose 2 pounds a week leads me to self sabotage and I start craving 1000 meals at restaurants. I set my goal to lose a pound per week, which means I eat 2400 calories a day and in 1 year I will lose approx 52 pounds.
You can do this. Your goal is to be healthier. Don't look at this as a temporary fix. You can't avoid certain food for the rest of your life
Thank you! Funny you should say that - I just switched my diary to losing 1 lb a week instead of 2, and it's giving me 1,850 calories a day. Definitely something i can work with. It makes me feel a little better and less anxious about being hungry.
I had a feeling you were self-sabotaging by trying to create too large a calorie deficit - glad to hear you are planning to moderate this time
What do you do about exercise and the calories you earn from that?1 -
kshama2001 wrote: »whatalazyidiot wrote: »Dont diet! Make a sustainable meal plan.
I personally eat IIFYM. So I have ice cream, steak, potatoes, salads, eggs, Whatever I want but it fits in my calories. I eat a higher amount. Setting to lose 2 pounds a week leads me to self sabotage and I start craving 1000 meals at restaurants. I set my goal to lose a pound per week, which means I eat 2400 calories a day and in 1 year I will lose approx 52 pounds.
You can do this. Your goal is to be healthier. Don't look at this as a temporary fix. You can't avoid certain food for the rest of your life
Thank you! Funny you should say that - I just switched my diary to losing 1 lb a week instead of 2, and it's giving me 1,850 calories a day. Definitely something i can work with. It makes me feel a little better and less anxious about being hungry.
I had a feeling you were self-sabotaging by trying to create too large a calorie deficit - glad to hear you are planning to moderate this time
What do you do about exercise and the calories you earn from that?
I have a treadmill at home, so I use that usually 5 days a week, and then I try to do strength training at least a couple days a week. I take it pretty easy with exercise, and mostly use it for health, not weight loss. I don't eat the exercise calories back.0 -
whatalazyidiot wrote: »kshama2001 wrote: »whatalazyidiot wrote: »Dont diet! Make a sustainable meal plan.
I personally eat IIFYM. So I have ice cream, steak, potatoes, salads, eggs, Whatever I want but it fits in my calories. I eat a higher amount. Setting to lose 2 pounds a week leads me to self sabotage and I start craving 1000 meals at restaurants. I set my goal to lose a pound per week, which means I eat 2400 calories a day and in 1 year I will lose approx 52 pounds.
You can do this. Your goal is to be healthier. Don't look at this as a temporary fix. You can't avoid certain food for the rest of your life
Thank you! Funny you should say that - I just switched my diary to losing 1 lb a week instead of 2, and it's giving me 1,850 calories a day. Definitely something i can work with. It makes me feel a little better and less anxious about being hungry.
I had a feeling you were self-sabotaging by trying to create too large a calorie deficit - glad to hear you are planning to moderate this time
What do you do about exercise and the calories you earn from that?
I have a treadmill at home, so I use that usually 5 days a week, and then I try to do strength training at least a couple days a week. I take it pretty easy with exercise, and mostly use it for health, not weight loss. I don't eat the exercise calories back.
Staying active IMHO is half the battle! 🙌🏻1 -
For me, what's helpful is to check in every day about the reasons I'm eating healthy. I work on being mindful of not only my choices, my exercise, but also simply the reasons I'm doing it. Every day. Mindfully.
Make a list of your reasons.
Make a list of your successes - no matter how small
Make a list of your discoveries
Go over it every day
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How did I stop sabotaging myself?
In all aspects of my life - home life, looking after kids, Health and nutrition ect?
I realised at 40 (yes it too a while)....that I AM IMPORTANT!!!! I come first. Through counseling and change of mindset, and with time. I come first. I deserve to to happy.
Find out what’s important and set goals. Find out what I enjoy and do more of that (hiking). Find out what I hate and do none of it (pleasing others).
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Tracking calories is the ONLY thing that has worked for me and it completely changed my life. I started to lose weight with MFP in October 2017 (186 lbs) and now I am right around 150. The first few months was when I lost the majority of the weight and rest has been slooooooooooow. You just have to remember that slow progress is still progress. Also, eliminating your favorite foods entirely is a recipe for disaster. Everything is okay in moderation!2
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A combo of things:
• Self loathing
• Raw veganism
• wanting to feel confident
• Men...
• motivation and inspiration from others1 -
UltraVegAthlete wrote: »A combo of things:
• Self loathing
• Raw veganism
• wanting to feel confident
• Men...
• motivation and inspiration from others
Lol sorry, the self loathing thing made me laugh.
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I had to get really serious with myself and have a very stark conversation that was very honest. I truly don't believe "self sabotage" is a thing, but that could just be me being pedantic. I am an adult capable of making change and decisions, and I really have to constantly remind myself that I am the master of my body, not the other way around. But it's so very hard.2
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I didn't read through the thread carefully, so apologize if this has been mentioned (or maybe I am second-ing it
). There is a book called The Beck Diet Solution. It's not a diet, but is a manual for cognitive behavioral therapy as it pertains to diet and weight loss- identifying negative thinking and sabotaging thoughts that lead to making poor choices and providing strategies to overcome them. Many have found it helpful. 0 -
I've managed complex change for firms for the past decade and run into a similar situation outside of weight management, but believe this applies. Humans generally don't like change, even when that may lead to "success". Change means we may not keep the same friends, same situations even if things may be better these will be different.
https://www.inc.com/james-sudakow/why-fear-of-success-is-holding-you-back-more-than-.html
Personally I got tired of making excuses and took extreme ownership of everything wrong in my life. Once I did that things started turning for the better.2 -
whatalazyidiot wrote: »kshama2001 wrote: »whatalazyidiot wrote: »Dont diet! Make a sustainable meal plan.
I personally eat IIFYM. So I have ice cream, steak, potatoes, salads, eggs, Whatever I want but it fits in my calories. I eat a higher amount. Setting to lose 2 pounds a week leads me to self sabotage and I start craving 1000 meals at restaurants. I set my goal to lose a pound per week, which means I eat 2400 calories a day and in 1 year I will lose approx 52 pounds.
You can do this. Your goal is to be healthier. Don't look at this as a temporary fix. You can't avoid certain food for the rest of your life
Thank you! Funny you should say that - I just switched my diary to losing 1 lb a week instead of 2, and it's giving me 1,850 calories a day. Definitely something i can work with. It makes me feel a little better and less anxious about being hungry.
I had a feeling you were self-sabotaging by trying to create too large a calorie deficit - glad to hear you are planning to moderate this time
What do you do about exercise and the calories you earn from that?
I have a treadmill at home, so I use that usually 5 days a week, and then I try to do strength training at least a couple days a week. I take it pretty easy with exercise, and mostly use it for health, not weight loss. I don't eat the exercise calories back.
Since you use MFP to set your calorie goal, exercise, but don't eat back any exercise calories, you are not using MFP the way it was designed. I encourage you to eat at least 50% of the calories back.
Unlike other sites which use TDEE calculators, MFP uses the NEAT method (Non-Exercise Activity Thermogenesis), and as such this system is designed for exercise calories to be eaten back. However, many consider the burns given by MFP to be inflated and only eat a percentage, such as 50%, back. Others, however, are able to lose weight while eating 100% of their exercise calories.
http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/818082/exercise-calories-again-wtf/p1
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kshama2001 wrote: »whatalazyidiot wrote: »kshama2001 wrote: »whatalazyidiot wrote: »Dont diet! Make a sustainable meal plan.
I personally eat IIFYM. So I have ice cream, steak, potatoes, salads, eggs, Whatever I want but it fits in my calories. I eat a higher amount. Setting to lose 2 pounds a week leads me to self sabotage and I start craving 1000 meals at restaurants. I set my goal to lose a pound per week, which means I eat 2400 calories a day and in 1 year I will lose approx 52 pounds.
You can do this. Your goal is to be healthier. Don't look at this as a temporary fix. You can't avoid certain food for the rest of your life
Thank you! Funny you should say that - I just switched my diary to losing 1 lb a week instead of 2, and it's giving me 1,850 calories a day. Definitely something i can work with. It makes me feel a little better and less anxious about being hungry.
I had a feeling you were self-sabotaging by trying to create too large a calorie deficit - glad to hear you are planning to moderate this time
What do you do about exercise and the calories you earn from that?
I have a treadmill at home, so I use that usually 5 days a week, and then I try to do strength training at least a couple days a week. I take it pretty easy with exercise, and mostly use it for health, not weight loss. I don't eat the exercise calories back.
Since you use MFP to set your calorie goal, exercise, but don't eat back any exercise calories, you are not using MFP the way it was designed. I encourage you to eat at least 50% of the calories back.
Unlike other sites which use TDEE calculators, MFP uses the NEAT method (Non-Exercise Activity Thermogenesis), and as such this system is designed for exercise calories to be eaten back. However, many consider the burns given by MFP to be inflated and only eat a percentage, such as 50%, back. Others, however, are able to lose weight while eating 100% of their exercise calories.
http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/818082/exercise-calories-again-wtf/p1
I do actually eat them back now I didn't the first few days, then found all the threads about it and decided to eat back half.
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seltzermint555 wrote: »I have never experienced this, but you have given me a lot more insight to why many people do so many different specific diets or eating plans. I never understood it. I mean this sincerely.
My Fitness Pal and calorie counting is the only thing I've ever tried outside of just a vague notion of "trying to eat less and eat healthier" so I have zero familiarity with the various diets. I will say it worked well for me as I've kept off over 100 for 5 years. Maybe it's worth a shot, just doing moderation? I don't know your goals though and fully understand that losing 100 is a lot different than losing that last 10-15 lb.
Ok now go ahead and "woo" me, rude person who woos all of my posts this week. Thanks.
I always thought 'woo' is like a 'wow' well done !! I'v always used it as a positive. Maybe someone thinks your inspiring 0
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