Would like to go to a gym but feel too intimidated
zfaque
Posts: 7 Member
I have a lot to lose at about 100 lb and realise I need to excercise. I’ve never been to a gym in my life and the idea of going makes me very anxious. I will feel embarrassed in front of all the fit and healthy people, I’m not sure I can face it. Can anyone give me any pointers or share your experiences, it would really help. Thanks
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Replies
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I have a lot to lose at about 100 lb and realise I need to excercise. I’ve never been to a gym in my life and the idea of going makes me very anxious. I will feel embarrassed in front of all the fit and healthy people, I’m not sure I can face it. Can anyone give me any pointers or share your experiences, it would really help. Thanks
i can guarantee that NO ONE cares what you're doing, they're just there to get their workout done.
that being said, i have never set foot in a gym, and it is not necessary to to get fit or lose weight.10 -
If you want to you can exercise at home. Many people have your problem. I'd like to ask "who do you think should be going to the gym?"--- Exactly. Those that need or want to. If you're in one of those categories, well then, get going.0
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Set up an appointment with a personal trainer at the gym. Their attitude should tell you if you'll feel welcome or not, and they can give you direction in your workouts.3
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I will feel embarrassed in front of all the fit and healthy people, I’m not sure I can face it.
A large number of people in the gym aren’t already fit and healthy. I see:
Fat people (who care *kitten* all about anyone else)
Skinny fat people (who care *kitten* all about anyone else)
Weight lifters (who care *kitten* all about anyone else)
Gym bunnies (who care *kitten* all about anyone else)
Fit and healthy people (who care *kitten* all about anyone else)
Everyone does their own thing in the gym. They are either too vain/self-absorbed to notice you, or too in the zone to notice you.
Honestly, you’ll wonder why you were scared before you know it.
And if anyone does make any comments towards you, report them to management. A half-decent gym will take care of people like that.8 -
The gym is a place where you go to get fit & healthy - it's not just a place where fit people go.
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I understand being self-conscious at the gym. As has been said, though, there are a wide variety of people at most gyms and most everyone is there to do their thing and get on with their life. You'll have anxiety at first, but before long you'll be just as focused as everyone else.
I know of what I speak - I go to a university gym where most everyone is thirty years younger than me and in better shape.2 -
Can you call the gym and find out when their busy and slow times are, then go during the slow times so there will be less people around? Would that help?8
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You can certainly exercise at home. YouTube has hundreds of exercise tutorials. If you need the incentive of working out with other people, know that what others are saying here is true. You are likely to see all fitness levels there, especially since it's the beginning of the year when people embark on resolutions. I recently became a member of our local YMCA, and a lot of people I'm seeing are in worse shape than I am.3
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Take a deep breath and just go. You'll see that your fears are unfounded. Yes, it's scary to do something new, but your health is important. Have courage and give it a try. You'll be proud of yourself and have a good time.6
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Those of us who are fit and healthy usually want other people to be fit and healthy. This is usually more so the healthier and fitter you get. If you want a really open, welcoming atmosphere, go to a serious Gold's Gym type of lifting place which is going to be the most intimidating from the outside, likely the most welcoming on the inside.
I go to the gym and see somebody who looks really out of shape, it's all I can do to keep my mouth shut and stay in my lane. We want to be Jehova's witnesses about it. We see you working out and we're like Emperor Palpatine, "Yes, yes, feel burn in your muscles. Cooooome to the fit side."
So many people are going to be secretly rooting for you, OMG you have NO IDEA.
We're restraining ourselves. Just ask one question, you'll suddenly be drowning in advice, encouragement, positivity.15 -
I go to Planet Fitness and they stay true to the no critics rule, everyone is there for the same reason. As long as you’re putting yourself first and doing the best you can, you’ll be surrounded by people willing to help and who are on a very similar journey. You’ve got this, and you can do it!2
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I have a lot to lose at about 100 lb and realise I need to excercise. I’ve never been to a gym in my life and the idea of going makes me very anxious. I will feel embarrassed in front of all the fit and healthy people, I’m not sure I can face it. Can anyone give me any pointers or share your experiences, it would really help. Thanks
You would be surprised by the variety of body shapes you'll see at the gym. Not everyone is "fit and healthy", there are lots of people who, like you, are just starting out. Don't let your perception become your reality, most people are there to work out and aren't really concerned / interested in what others look like or are doing.
Keep in mind also that losing weight doesn't necessarily require joining a gym and/or exercise. Weight loss happens in the kitchen, exercise results in improved fitness (you'd be surprised by the number of people who are over their "ideal" weight who are running marathons & triathlons etc.........you can be overweight and fit or slim and unfit,they don't necessarily go hand in hand)
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You are not the only one in this boat. I am 300+ and I would love to go to the gym. Since I started to lose weight, I noticed that I now need to tone up. But you right it is hard to go into the gym . But remember if you decided to go, you are doing it for you not anybody else in that gym. It is a huge step, but remember we all started somewhere.
But I also work out at home. I have a treadmill, a step thing, and some weights. Either way you go, you are making a better change for you and that is all that really matters3 -
I have a lot to lose at about 100 lb and realise I need to excercise. I’ve never been to a gym in my life and the idea of going makes me very anxious. I will feel embarrassed in front of all the fit and healthy people, I’m not sure I can face it. Can anyone give me any pointers or share your experiences, it would really help. Thanks
I've been in and out of gyms for much of my life. In my experience, while there are fit and healthy people there, there are usually far more people trying to get fit and healthy...and the fit and healthy one's had to start somewhere also.
That said, a gym is not required to lose weight or to get some exercise in. I go to the gym to lift weights a few days per week...and some cardio if the weather is bad...otherwise, most of my exercise is outside on my road bike. I didn't start going to the gym again until I was a few months into my weight loss...When I started, I mostly did a lot of walking and body weight exercises and then just advanced from there.1 -
After losing 50lb I'm in my phase 2 and still have a lot to lose too. I joined a gym last week as I wanted to do some toning, I was very nervous and thought long and hard about it. I've joined with a buddy, which will help, but before doing so we went and had a look around, found out when the busy times were, so we could avoid them. We went back again to meet the staff, who were absolutely lovely and put us really at ease. We felt very comfortable, so much so that I did a session on my own.
I completely understand how you feel so would recommend meeting the staff and asking for a trial period if possible. If you explain your worries and they can reassure you then you're half way there. And if you're still not sure try working out at home until you see some results and try again.
Best of luck.1 -
Those of us who are fit and healthy usually want other people to be fit and healthy. This is usually more so the healthier and fitter you get. If you want a really open, welcoming atmosphere, go to a serious Gold's Gym type of lifting place which is going to be the most intimidating from the outside, likely the most welcoming on the inside.
I go to the gym and see somebody who looks really out of shape, it's all I can do to keep my mouth shut and stay in my lane. We want to be Jehova's witnesses about it. We see you working out and we're like Emperor Palpatine, "Yes, yes, feel burn in your muscles. Cooooome to the fit side."
So many people are going to be secretly rooting for you, OMG you have NO IDEA.
We're restraining ourselves. Just ask one question, you'll suddenly be drowning in advice, encouragement, positivity.
I waver between being the person you just described and being exactly like the op and feeling like all the 20somethings(my oldest sons age) are judging me.
Op, go! You will find a grove, a place, maybe even some people to workout with. I understand feeling like all eyes are on you, I have always had poor self esteem and have felt this way at my very heaviest and my very fittest. But, if you wanna be at the gym, then be there. Hire someone to teach you about the equipment or get a trainer for a session or two to get you started with a routine so you don’t feel like you are wandering. Or, at the very least, make a list of simple moves you already know how to do(bicep curls, crunches) and grab a mat, do a few sets of those and then head for a bike and watch your surroundings for a bit. It won’t take much time and you will feel far more comfy there.4 -
What helped me feel less self conscious was going in with a plan. I knew I was going to warm up on the treadmill for 10 minutes, then I was going to do my workout (whatever you like - if you want to pull one of the many off the internet), then I was going to walk for a half hour on the treadmill at the end. Knowing what you're going to can help you feel less lost and more confident.
Now, I go in to train for my sport (powerlifting). I have friends there I talk to, I know exactly what equipment I need... and I feel like I've "earned" my place there... BUT! I know that just by walking in the front door I (and everyone else in that building) has "earned" their place there.
So go and forget about everyone else. In a few weeks you'll start feeling a lot more confident, and the out of place feelings will fade.6 -
I have a lot to lose at about 100 lb and realise I need to excercise. I’ve never been to a gym in my life and the idea of going makes me very anxious. I will feel embarrassed in front of all the fit and healthy people, I’m not sure I can face it. Can anyone give me any pointers or share your experiences, it would really help. Thanks
I felt exactly like you did. In some ways even worse because I was starting out with a water aerobics class so I had to walk around in a bathing suit will all my spandex clad fat available for viewing. You know what? Nobody cared. The looks I got were mostly "who's the new girl?" type looks.
Check out a few places and see if they tend to cater to the really fit or to everybody. You want a simple program to start so ask what programs they offer. If you are looking for some place that has equipment rather than classes, look for a place that offers free introductory sessions with a trainer so you can learn proper technique.
Trust me, most people are too into their own workout to pay attention. Be polite, wipe down anything after using it, and smile and nod when you meet someone's eye and you will be fine. The hardest part is the first day. Once you have been there once, the rest is much easier.4 -
Can you call the gym and find out when their busy and slow times are, then go during the slow times so there will be less people around? Would that help?Can you call the gym and find out when their busy and slow times are, then go during the slow times so there will be less people around? Would that help?Can you call the gym and find out when their busy and slow times are, then go during the slow times so there will be less people around? Would that help?
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I’m not sure how I’ve entered that 3 times?! Let’s hope I do better on this journey than I do with technology. Many thanks all for your responses. I think I’ll start with you tube excercises then when I feel more confident I will call the gym to see when the less busy times are and give it a go. Thanks again all3
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The photo on the left is me just before my very first visit to the gym, I also have autism so was extremely nervous about that first visit. What I did was phoned up beforehand and arranged an induction during their most quiet period. They were really nice, helped set me up with a routine, I'd put my earphones in and everyone left me alone. Each time you go it gets a little easier and you feel a little less anxious. You'll soon realise that 99% of people there are friendly and supportative. There's always one dick but I found that other people soon told him to stop being a prat.
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I love your new photo, @firef1y72!1
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These posts always make me so sad. Don't be ashamed or embarrassed. Be proud that you're getting healthy! I guarantee you that no one is giving you a second thought. I'm a self-proclaimed gym rat. I put my headphones in and concentrate on what I have to do. I'll only notice you if you're hogging all of the equipment (don't be THAT guy )2
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quiksylver296 wrote: »I love your new photo, @firef1y72!
Thank you, I love it too, it really sums up my new found love of life and running. Plus flying feet, I actually got flying feet.6 -
I would totally suggest a trainer to start. My sister recently had 10 sessions with a trainer to get her started. Not only does she have a better understanding of the work-out equipment, but she feels more confident to walk in. I agree that anxiety plays a huge part in going to the gym. I struggle myself, and I think some the "healthy, fit" people even struggle with anxiety in going to the gym as well! It's totally normal. Know that you have a support system here! Good luck.0
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I’m not sure how I’ve entered that 3 times?! Let’s hope I do better on this journey than I do with technology. Many thanks all for your responses. I think I’ll start with you tube excercises then when I feel more confident I will call the gym to see when the less busy times are and give it a go. Thanks again all
Try the fit father project by Dr Anthony Bulzini0 -
jacalynrose11 wrote: »I would totally suggest a trainer to start. My sister recently had 10 sessions with a trainer to get her started. Not only does she have a better understanding of the work-out equipment, but she feels more confident to walk in. I agree that anxiety plays a huge part in going to the gym. I struggle myself, and I think some the "healthy, fit" people even struggle with anxiety in going to the gym as well! It's totally normal. Know that you have a support system here! Good luck.
I think it's normal to experience some anxiety when you go anywhere new or try something new...whether that's a new job, new school, new church, etc. It's newness and you don't know anybody and don't know what's what.
I've been going to the same gym now for about 3-4 years...I'm very comfortable there...it's small and I pretty much know everybody there, including clientele and all the trainers. It's all very familiar and comfortable.
Recently I started experimenting with another gym that is up the road from my office. 3 days per week I work at this particular office and I have an hour commute each way...getting to my old gym in the evening after 8+ hrs of work and a 2 hour commute was becoming a chore and as a result I was becoming very inconsistent with going so I decided to try this other place and go at lunch. I've only been going for a couple of weeks...I don't know anybody and nobody knows me and it all feels very alien and unnerving. I'm pretty fit and I've been in and out of gyms much of my life...this feeling is nothing new when changing gyms, but after a month or so things tend to settle and you start to feel more at home.5 -
1. I've discovered nobody cares.
2. This time of year, there are a lot of slightly to very out of shape people. Refer back to point 1.
3. Busy times of day can be better if you feel people are judging you, as there is so much going on, no one can focus on just you.
4. If you just feel uncomfortable or don't know how to use the machines, approach the front desk and ask them if they offer any orientation sessions, or find out how much a personal trainer is to help you get a good start. Once you are more comfortable with all the options they have, you will find you are more comfortable overall.
Best wishes!!
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Go to the gym because of how good you’ll feel when you’re done working out. Don’t even care what others are thinking.1
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