We Broke Up Because....... part 2 .....
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She didn't appreciate Bills awesome tie collection0
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He touched my drum set!0
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He'd always sigh after my jokes and wouldn't do 'ba dum tss' after my jokes. So I started using his drum set and he got all pissed off.0 -
Woke up every day with a joke of the day and consistent sarcasm... I lost track of what’s real0
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He had me lather up his hemorrhoids with preperation H every morning, but refused to lather my rhoids up.0
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He wouldn't let me eat meat..0
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She always wanted to toss my salad instead of eat the one I made for her.0
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She smelled like beef.
(please tell me you’ve seen that vine lol)
***edit. Oops that was meant for slimgirljo15 lol1 -
Her posts to me were meant for slimgirljo15.0
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Because he questioned my love and devotion.0
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We never broke up, it was a lie, propaganda spread by our enemies
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He lost count of how many girlfriends he had.0
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He or she said then instead of than.0
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I died.. his dutch ovens were lethal0
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She didn't consider my dutch ovens to be foreplay.0
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He smelt funky..0
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I wreaked of the funky cold medina.0
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He punched my friend Sheena.0
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She filled my bed with purple diarrhea.0
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He wanted to date girls, and I’m a grown a** woman0
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She played Alliance and I am for the Horde!0
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He made me chose sides0
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She was indecisive.0
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There were only ever two options: his choice or the wrong choice0
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She couldn't handle that I was always right and picked the opposite which was the wrong choice!0
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I’m a natural born rebel, and he wanted to tame me0
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She thought she was a rebel, but she was just a hipster!0
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He took his typewriter to Starbucks every day and had the nerve to call me a hipster.0
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She followed me to Starbucks daily and stole my typewriter ribbon while I was trying to write an epic romcom involving her!0
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His rom com didn’t have a sci-fi twist0
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