Welcome to Debate Club! Please be aware that this is a space for respectful debate, and that your ideas will be challenged here. Please remember to critique the argument, not the author.

Talking to a Loved One About Weight Loss

TynaBaby17 Posts: 56 Member
Have you ever had a discussion with a overweight/obese family member or someone you loved about their weight because you were genuinely concerned for them?
Did you make a plan to talk about it? Did you bring it up randomly? Did anything you said help/hinder them? Would you change how you did it if you could?

I have an immediate family member who is overweight and has been for sometime. Fortunately they are young so there are not too many weight related issues that they have encountered yet.
But how do you help bring up a sensitive topic like this in a way that might actually spark change?
I try to drop subtly hints/invitations for them to come exercise with me or we could go grocery shopping together or take a exercise class together or something but it always gets blown off.

I don't want this person to wait until something extreme happens for them to realize they have to make a change. It is hard to just sit back and watch when you really care about someone struggling with being over weight/obese.


  • lin_be
    lin_be Posts: 393 Member
    I’ve had this conversation with my mother. I began it with “This is an uncomfortable subject but I want to discuss it with you because I’m worried that ignoring it just because it’s uncomfortable is really silly. Also, because I love you and am concerned about your health. Specifically, your doctor said ‘blah blah’ but it’s good that we can reverse this before it gets bad so let’s talk about what we can change.”
  • CSARdiver
    CSARdiver Posts: 6,257 Member
    It's hard to tell and will take any number of strategies to get through to them. Some require a gentle touch while others respond to direct action.

    In the end the only person able to correct this is that individual. Any attempt to point out bad behavior will likely hurt your relationship with them. All you can really do is lead by example and help them if they reach out.
  • Crafty_camper123
    Crafty_camper123 Posts: 1,440 Member
    I have a friend who is morbidly obese that I've been trying for years to get him on top of his health. The conversation always migrates to weight loss (usually by him). I try to give him the best tips and advice I know of. (IE counting calories, getting a food scale, just walking, etc) He's probably sick of hearing about it from me (and my husband). Although he seems to want to lose weight, he refuses to do much other then "mentally" counting his calories. Or doing things like "just eating noodles and butter" instead of spaghetti or drinking fruit juice instead of soda. It's a little frustrating. Unfortunatly it's up to him to find his "why" and "what" for his weight loss and health. Until something major happens that hopefully scares him into changing his habits for good, all I can do is hint and offer up what I know. People won't change unless they want to.