Why you should NEVER pick a weight loss method because it helped someone else lose weight.
NovusDies
Posts: 8,940 Member
I have noticed during my time here that when someone starts showing positive results on the bathroom scale they want others to do what they are doing. I don't really understand why.
All fat weight loss is driven by a calorie deficit. This does not mean you have to count calories or even log here at MFP to lose weight. It just means that however you get there it is a calorie deficit that makes your body lose fat weight.
My reasons for not picking a diet because it helped someone else:
1) Many people lose water weight in their first week or so regardless of their method. This often creates tales of losing 10+ pounds in 2 or 3 weeks. It is helpful to remember that your weight will fluctuate and that some or all of that water weight will show back up in time for various reasons. Quick losses are not real losses unless a person is very heavy and even then it will still take a long time and slow down as weight is lost.
2) People get excited quickly and exit quickly. That person you are listening to for your new weight loss method may have only been on it for 3 weeks and will be off of it in another 3. That doesn't make that system wrong but just don't get taken in by people who have barely had time to understand what they are doing before they quit it.
3) Even if a person lost all the weight they wanted to lose and maintained that loss for years it only means they are an expert on themselves. Much of weight loss is mental not physical and while we all may lose weight because of a calorie deficit we won't have the same mentality while doing it.
4) All methods have huge drop out rates and regain rates. Obesity has not been solved by the {insert diet name here} method.
5) All legitimate and healthy methods have successes if they have been around for awhile. Obesity may not have been cured for everyone by {insert diet name here} but it has been solved for some.
I am no expert except at failing which I have done many times for multiple decades. What I have learned from my failures and why I am not failing at the moment is that I have to pick/design a system that fits me not try and force me to fit a system. I now realize that a legitimate and healthy diet is made up of parts and I can choose which parts I want to apply to myself. My current method is a combination of 4 different plan systems with rules and concepts that are made up by me and different people I have heard mention good ideas over the years.
All fat weight loss is driven by a calorie deficit. This does not mean you have to count calories or even log here at MFP to lose weight. It just means that however you get there it is a calorie deficit that makes your body lose fat weight.
My reasons for not picking a diet because it helped someone else:
1) Many people lose water weight in their first week or so regardless of their method. This often creates tales of losing 10+ pounds in 2 or 3 weeks. It is helpful to remember that your weight will fluctuate and that some or all of that water weight will show back up in time for various reasons. Quick losses are not real losses unless a person is very heavy and even then it will still take a long time and slow down as weight is lost.
2) People get excited quickly and exit quickly. That person you are listening to for your new weight loss method may have only been on it for 3 weeks and will be off of it in another 3. That doesn't make that system wrong but just don't get taken in by people who have barely had time to understand what they are doing before they quit it.
3) Even if a person lost all the weight they wanted to lose and maintained that loss for years it only means they are an expert on themselves. Much of weight loss is mental not physical and while we all may lose weight because of a calorie deficit we won't have the same mentality while doing it.
4) All methods have huge drop out rates and regain rates. Obesity has not been solved by the {insert diet name here} method.
5) All legitimate and healthy methods have successes if they have been around for awhile. Obesity may not have been cured for everyone by {insert diet name here} but it has been solved for some.
I am no expert except at failing which I have done many times for multiple decades. What I have learned from my failures and why I am not failing at the moment is that I have to pick/design a system that fits me not try and force me to fit a system. I now realize that a legitimate and healthy diet is made up of parts and I can choose which parts I want to apply to myself. My current method is a combination of 4 different plan systems with rules and concepts that are made up by me and different people I have heard mention good ideas over the years.
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Replies
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Yeah, I'm kind of at the point where if one more person tells me to try keto my brain will actually literally melt and drain out my ears.
You do you. I'm doing me.66 -
Yep all the above.
I lost over 20kg (around 50lb) and often get asked how I did it. they all get so disappointed when I say "I ate less and moved more" because they are looking for that quick fix. To find out it was the old fashioned 'hard way" they don't really wan tot hear it. oh and I don't diet. I literally just ate less of what I usually ate - so I have chocolate every day, and cake and ice-cream etc. i just eat about half the amount I used to. And I run. a lot.25 -
Agreed completely. Lots of people like to "bash" someone's method if it's not the "accepted" method, but reality is, if it works for them, who cares? Yes, it all comes down to a deficit, but there are a lot of different ways to create said deficit, and what works for me, may not work for you, and vice versa.
I think for someone who has struggled understanding what a deficit actually looks like on their plate can be an important step, as even food labels are very unreliable, understanding the tools/skills needed to get the results you want - but finding and discovering your own way to get there is a good thing IMO.
I'm not likely to bash any particular diet, all I can say is why something does or doesn't work for me - when other people get overly pushy or judgemental because you don't want to do it their way is when I get annoyed.
That being said, if what you're doing is NOT working, and you're asking for advice, be prepared to be told that what you are doing is wrong for whatever reasons - because, obviously, you're NOT getting that deficit that is required.10 -
n=1 results is the main thing I go for at age of 68. Finally finding a WOE that cuts out going hungry and still maintaining weight and pain since 2014.is awesome.12
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Excellent post! :flowerforyou:3
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Agree 100%
Educate yourself. Experiment and find what works for you, being mindful of getting proper nutrition and staying within your calorie deficit while losing. Hopefully, maintenance is for a long time. What will be sustainable for each of us, may be helpful for being in the small majority that keep the weight off.
And no matter which “diet” you choose, weight loss is always because you ate less calories than your body burns.6 -
And it wouldn't even be the matter of this has worked great for me comments about it.
It's all too often presented as you need to do this - ie don't eat after 6 pm, 8 snacks a day, 1 meal a day, ect.
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The only calorie-deficit plan that works is the one you can stick to.22
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Keto, Nutrisystem or "diet plans" such as those I don't care to hear about. I do Weight Watchers and there's no special food. All you do is stay within a certain amount of points. It does help for someone who needs to lose weight and can't stick to not overeating so I do tell people what I'm doing if they ask me but I don't push it on them. I still eat what I want but just less of it.3
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Good thread.4
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Yeah, I'm kind of at the point where if one more person tells me to try keto my brain will actually literally melt and drain out my ears.
Ha, that'd be a big weight drop, too...losing your brain.
Yes, there's plenty of ways to lose the weight, just like there's plenty of ways to live a life. A new user may have to experiement a bit to find the way of eating that allows them to get all the calories they need, still feel satisfied, and lose weight. My husband, for example, is very high on protein, high on fat, and low on carbs. And his protein is red meat. And he generally eats once a day, around dinner. I would gain weight AND go mad on that plan. I need balance among all macros, and I prefer white meat far more. And I can't eat once a day or I get angry or faint. So he does what works for him and I do me.
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TanyaHooton wrote: »Yeah, I'm kind of at the point where if one more person tells me to try keto my brain will actually literally melt and drain out my ears.
Ha, that'd be a big weight drop, too...losing your brain.
Yes, there's plenty of ways to lose the weight, just like there's plenty of ways to live a life. A new user may have to experiement a bit to find the way of eating that allows them to get all the calories they need, still feel satisfied, and lose weight. My husband, for example, is very high on protein, high on fat, and low on carbs. And his protein is red meat. And he generally eats once a day, around dinner. I would gain weight AND go mad on that plan. I need balance among all macros, and I prefer white meat far more. And I can't eat once a day or I get angry or faint. So he does what works for him and I do me.
Na. Only about 3lbs.
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brain waterladyreva78 wrote: »Na. Only about 3lbs.
and about 15% of that water weight - so it really doesn't count!
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I think there are really only two 'rules' with weight loss that everyone should follow for success.
1. Eat less than you burn.
2. Choose a way of eating that works for you to not only stay in a deficit but that you can continue with into maintenance.
The way to achieve this is individual. The only 'wrong' way is a method that can cause harm to your body but, then you are not really doing rule number 2 in the first place because any method of rapid weight loss is unsustainable.22 -
In my next thread I might discuss how you should NEVER pick a diet based on social media or youtube either.25
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Yeah, I'm kind of at the point where if one more person tells me to try keto my brain will actually literally melt and drain out my ears.
You do you. I'm doing me.
Yep. And that would be a very quick weight loss....
[edit: should have read the whole thread, that was too easy to jump on...]3 -
Yup. But I admit I'm tempted.
My friend did an acupressure/ vegan cleanse. I tried to. I lost time and money. We both regained the weight.
My other friend went from vegan to keto. She's always slamming me for counting calories and portion control, punctuated with tons of eye rolls. She doesn't like to do math and believes every healthy weight person looks "fat adapted". Honestly the people she often refers to are very active and tend to be moderate in their eating habits. Then she tells me how she pours the cooking oil from her meat on her veggies and eats it as keto meals. And I wanna vomit a little. She also can't eat in social settings except for cheese, veggies, and salmon.
I'm quite happy eating any food of my choice in any setting. Works for me. I've researched keto and to do keto as set out (she does dirty keto) involves too much for me.
I'd love to see a part 2 of this post (IG, YouTube diets).5 -
If I'm looking to solve a problem and something works for someone else, I think it's worth at least looking at and assessing whether it's for me. It usually isn't, but I might be able to use that idea to work out something that is for me. I have no problem with others telling what's worked for them, especially if it's worked long term, and I encourage them to talk about themselves. (Not everything is about me, anyway.)
If I'm looking for answers to a problem I have, why not look at what other people did and see if it'll work for me? Of course, if I'm already doing what works for me, trying something new because it works for someone else would be stupid.11 -
Clarisse_McClellan wrote: »If I'm looking to solve a problem and something works for someone else, I think it's worth at least looking at and assessing whether it's for me. It usually isn't, but I might be able to use that idea to work out something that is for me. I have no problem with others telling what's worked for them, especially if it's worked long term, and I encourage them to talk about themselves. (Not everything is about me, anyway.)
If I'm looking for answers to a problem I have, why not look at what other people did and see if it'll work for me? Of course, if I'm already doing what works for me, trying something new because it works for someone else would be stupid.
There is a difference between what you are suggesting which is making a critical assessment and just jumping on a weight loss method because of someone's results. I am always looking for new ideas and I am very interested in hearing methods from people who have succeeded. Since I post here quite often even if I don't see something for me I might file it away to suggest as a fit for someone else.
I see a lot of people who are overly results oriented instead of taking time to experiment and find the best choice for themselves. Any healthy method that doesn't require a financial commitment can be tried for a few weeks to see if it is a fit.10 -
I also dislike when I am doing something that is working for me (CICO, keeping food I enjoy in moderation) and others still feel a need to tell me why what I am doing is wrong and that I should be doing what they are doing instead. I never mind hearing what others try and find success with and I enjoy reading posts as there are a lot of good tips and ideas out there. But don’t push your way as the only way.13
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I must not have good attention to detail because I’ve never read a post here written in a way that wants others to do as they do.
Last time I acted on someone else’s strong suggestion was when viewing a YouTube video recommending using MFP. I acted and 30 lbs. later while already having 10 lbs. in the game, the rest is history.
Sometimes acting on someone’s suggestion is a good thing. Never is a strong word.18 -
pierinifitness wrote: »I must not have good attention to detail because I’ve never read a post here written in a way that wants others to do as they do.
Last time I acted on someone else’s strong suggestion was when viewing a YouTube video recommending using MFP. I acted and 30 lbs. later while already having 10 lbs. in the game, the rest is history.
Sometimes acting on someone’s suggestion is a good thing. Never is a strong word.
I can't help you with your attention to detail. Sorry.
It is a clickbait title.
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Clarisse_McClellan wrote: »If I'm looking to solve a problem and something works for someone else, I think it's worth at least looking at and assessing whether it's for me. It usually isn't, but I might be able to use that idea to work out something that is for me. I have no problem with others telling what's worked for them, especially if it's worked long term, and I encourage them to talk about themselves. (Not everything is about me, anyway.)
If I'm looking for answers to a problem I have, why not look at what other people did and see if it'll work for me? Of course, if I'm already doing what works for me, trying something new because it works for someone else would be stupid.
I think these are good points.
What gets me is that often when people are not having a problem, there are so many people who have latched onto the latest diet guru thing, or taken out of context something maybe a dietitian suggested they try for them, like adding breakfast or eating more often, or some magazine advice (cut out processed crap, even if you aren't really sure what "processed" means), or -- to be fair -- even have figured out something that works well for them, and then go around insisting that others should do that too. "But what I'm doing is working really well for me now." "No, I saw on Dr. Oz that you really should do the pegan diet!" or "But you can't lose weight longterm if you don't cut out all sweets forever!"
I also don't get the diet wars where people seem to identify by the diet they do and thus feel compelled to try to convince everyone else that their diet is superior. There are lots of healthy ways to eat, and lots of different paths to weight loss, and different people will prefer different ones. Matt Fitzgerald's Diet Cults is a pretty good look at this phenomenon that OP should check out if he hasn't read it already. I think he would like it.
It's also kind of funny if you look at the claims even diametrically opposed diets make, they tend to be the same ones.9 -
A am not here for "positive" but for NEGATIVE results: my scale needs to go down, down, down. I have come to hate the word "diet" - that word got me into the mess I have been in most of my adult life. Thank's to MFP and so many supportive members I had to learn how to follow a healthier life style, that mental health comes first and physical health and well being will follow, what trigger foods mean, my ideal macro composition which I can live with very long term and does not require any "cheat days". Seems to me that there is a special approach to weight loss for every single person out there. It "only" takes time - I haven't gained 80 kg (175 pounds) overnight, so I have to prepare myself for the long run. 415 days with MFP, 33 kg (72 pounds) gone - so far, so good!12
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Bump for a good thread.2
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neugebauer52 wrote: »A am not here for "positive" but for NEGATIVE results: my scale needs to go down, down, down. I have come to hate the word "diet" - that word got me into the mess I have been in most of my adult life. Thank's to MFP and so many supportive members I had to learn how to follow a healthier life style, that mental health comes first and physical health and well being will follow, what trigger foods mean, my ideal macro composition which I can live with very long term and does not require any "cheat days". Seems to me that there is a special approach to weight loss for every single person out there. It "only" takes time - I haven't gained 80 kg (175 pounds) overnight, so I have to prepare myself for the long run. 415 days with MFP, 33 kg (72 pounds) gone - so far, so good!
@neugebauer about 5 years ago after 40 years of failed diets I decided never to diet again because it was just killing me. After I did that I lost weight without thinking about losing weight and have maintained a 50 pound loss for 4 years eating the same foods that I was eating when I lost the weight. Thinking about not eating and going hungry to lose weight was a life time failure until I found the macros that worked for me long term. Best of continued success. If one is married to someone or something they feel the need to cheat on then maybe they are married to the wrong person or set of macros. 7
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