Creative ways to keep me out of the dog house?
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Honey you don't need anything creative, you need to listen to your husband and make it a priority to remember. You are hurting his feelings big time. Your kids are important, but they will grow up and leave you. If you want him around when they are gone, pay attention to him
I agree with this poster as well. 4 days a week of "stuff" doesn't make up for not being involved in anything else in his life
Whoa Whoa Whoa, slow down there sister. Not sure you can wean just from my post that I'm not involved in anything else in my husband's life. Sheesh!0 -
Is he on Facebook, Twitter or MySpace? If so, go on those sites and see if he posted anything about his day's activities so far. It may jog your memory. Or, chat up one of his friends and see if they mention anything!0
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Isn't this under chit-chat, fun and games? I thought it was a bit tongue in cheek. Maybe I'm wrong?0
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All of this, AND- tell him you have a crappy memory but it DOESN't mean that you don't love him or that he's not important. As a therapist, I can say that this is less about who remembers what, but it IS about how he interprets your forgetting/not listening, the meaning he makes out of it and how it makes him feel.
Don't make excuses but help him see that this is not a reflection of your feelings for him, it's a reflection of a weakness/difference in personality. Unless that's not true, and if that's the case, you have more to talk about than steaks and beer.
This, This, This. Thank you Dr. Love!0 -
Isn't this under chit-chat, fun and games? I thought it was a bit tongue in cheek. Maybe I'm wrong?
Yeah, I wasn't really looking for a spanking. Spanking....that could work...0 -
I have a big dry erase board on the wall in our den. I write everything on it otherwise I would forget things. Then we all can remember what eachother is doing.
Maybe that could help you too?
I need to add, we have 5 kids and a dog.
So if I can do it you can too!! Good Luck! 0 -
Isn't this under chit-chat, fun and games? I thought it was a bit tongue in cheek. Maybe I'm wrong?
Yeah, I wasn't really looking for a spanking. Spanking....that could work...
Ohh yeah you could be on to something...:)0 -
I see some of the replies implying you are a bad wife. I do not agree. How much does your husband help you with the kids and the house? When life gets chaotic and the wife is left to do EVERYTHING and the husband picks the WORST times to tell the wife stuff (She's doing laundry, getting dinner ready, and supervising the kids) it's hard to pay attention.
My man and I have an agreement - when something is important to us, we make SURE we tell the other when we know we are listening. For example, I'll say, "I have something important to tell you. Is this a good time?" And he lets me know.
I forget stuff all the time. So does my significant other. My feelings don't get hurt and neither do his. We both realize that life gets busy and we're HUMAN.
Tell him you forgot, and perhaps set up a way to tell each other the important stuff. Then write it down if you need to. Tell him you love him and you're sorry, but a little help around the house (assuming my hunch is right) might be to his benefit. But don't beat yourself up, and certainly don't let anyone else. Only YOU know what your marriage is like. Believe me, people love to judge a marriage...but no one knows what truly goes on behind closed doors.0 -
Not only are you wise and full of common sense, but you are spot-on. I am actually very proud of my relationship. I like the attention-getting idea. I'll work on this. That and spanking is going to fix this right quick!I see some of the replies implying you are a bad wife. I do not agree. How much does your husband help you with the kids and the house? When life gets chaotic and the wife is left to do EVERYTHING and the husband picks the WORST times to tell the wife stuff (She's doing laundry, getting dinner ready, and supervising the kids) it's hard to pay attention.
My man and I have an agreement - when something is important to us, we make SURE we tell the other when we know we are listening. For example, I'll say, "I have something important to tell you. Is this a good time?" And he lets me know.
I forget stuff all the time. So does my significant other. My feelings don't get hurt and neither do his. We both realize that life gets busy and we're HUMAN.
Tell him you forgot, and perhaps set up a way to tell each other the important stuff. Then write it down if you need to. Tell him you love him and you're sorry, but a little help around the house (assuming my hunch is right) might be to his benefit. But don't beat yourself up, and certainly don't let anyone else. Only YOU know what your marriage is like. Believe me, people love to judge a marriage...but no one knows what truly goes on behind closed doors.0 -
If he's a man this should work:
Make steak, serve him beer in his chair with football on. After the game, do what he wants in the bedroom and them make him a sammich.0 -
Sex and beer. And steak or other meat stuff.
Works like a charm.0 -
You have selective hearing. I suffer from the same problem. He's an attention *kitten*. Ignore him more.
PMSL :laugh:
I say....Bacon and mayb some baconnaise spread if u have it.0 -
Write it down. It helps.0
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We're easy to figure out. Must be to compensate for the difficulty of figuring out women.Sex and beer. And steak or other meat stuff.
Works like a charm.0 -
Honey you don't need anything creative, you need to listen to your husband and make it a priority to remember. You are hurting his feelings big time. Your kids are important, but they will grow up and leave you. If you want him around when they are gone, pay attention to him
Use google calendar and sync the calendars so you know what's going on in his world. It seems like a total cop-out that you know what's going on with the kids. Seriously, if you can't remember what is important to him (he's a man, men are not usually communicative unless they're telling you something important), write it down. If XYZ is happening and he is waiting for a response (need a sitter, need to rsvp, he's up for a promotion, interview, etc), write down what day that thing is supposed to happen on a calendar and then ask how it went.0 -
Honey you don't need anything creative, you need to listen to your husband and make it a priority to remember. You are hurting his feelings big time. Your kids are important, but they will grow up and leave you. If you want him around when they are gone, pay attention to him
yeah, neglect the kids, cuz one day they'll be adults. great logic.0 -
He actually wants you to listen to him? WOW! What a reverse role! I usually got scolded from not listening to women babble about nothing. I would just say 'Uh hu.. yea... thats nice, of course dear" while I was thinking about how I can find an excuse to go fishing or something.0
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This won't help you tonight, but I have a dry erase board where I keep everyones schedules. Regarding today, dress sluty and remind him how expensive it would be to train your replacement.0
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Send the kids to a sitter. Greet him at the door naked. Sit him down and tell him, "tell me all about it" while you disctract him and make yourself incapable of being asked questions (if you know what I mean.)
Boys are easily distracted by naked things.0 -
Buy steaks and beer, stat :laugh:
And don't forget the bj.0 -
I'm sorry to say this, but is "4 days a week" everything that your relationship is to YOU? Probably not. So it's most likely not everything to your husband either. I really can't see how you can forget things so important to him. My husband would be extremely hurt as well. I have 2 kids, 2 dogs, work full time, long commute, etc. and I can manage to pay attention to my husband besides in the sack. I agree with the calendar ideas, maybe just a little oranization will go a long way. Also maybe set aside one day a week (after the kids are in bed so there's no distractions) to get together on the upcoming week and what you both have going on.Honey you don't need anything creative, you need to listen to your husband and make it a priority to remember. You are hurting his feelings big time. Your kids are important, but they will grow up and leave you. If you want him around when they are gone, pay attention to him
We have a REALLY good relationship...and he gets plenty of attention - to the tune of 4 days a week, if you know what I mean.
You sound like super woman! What color is your cape?0 -
This is all great advice. But why does everyone assume he's on his way home? What if you forgot to pick him up at the airport or something?!0
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This is all great advice. But why does everyone assume he's on his way home? What if you forgot to pick him up at the airport or something?!
LOL0 -
You forgot something. You fessed up to it. You feel bad because you DO care. You are not the worst wife in the world. You are human.
Sheesh.
And where IS the damn remote control??0 -
This is all great advice. But why does everyone assume he's on his way home? What if you forgot to pick him up at the airport or something?!
Ha! We live 2 hours from an airport...I have 2 kids and a dog...and a job! He can drive himself home from the airport.
But, I HAVE to tell you all how it came down. He came home. He was pleasantly surprised.
Then, I said, "So, tell me about that thing this morning?" He said, "What thing?" And I said, "You know, when we were talking earlier, you said something about being done with something and it going well". He was SO confused. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about. I had a few meetings this morning that I don't think I even told you about. I think maybe I said something like: "My meetings ended and the day is going well".
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Sheesh. Well, hubby is happy, wifey is happy and to all of you judgy-judgersons - all is well in happy marriage land. And, I can assure you, that next time I will TRY to listen, but cannot promise I won't forget....but I suppose I can take a look at the big dry erase board I just installed over my husbands 60 inch flat screen to find out what he's up to this week.
Now...what do I do with the naughty school girl outfit I just bought?0 -
And where IS the damn remote control??
I don't know! I have a four year old that likes to hide stuff. The other day I found a tampon in his Nerf gun...0 -
And where IS the damn remote control??
I don't know! I have a four year old that likes to hide stuff. The other day I found a tampon in his Nerf gun...
THAT is rather genius of him!!!! *LOL*0 -
Yay- glad there was a happy ending 0
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Honey you don't need anything creative, you need to listen to your husband and make it a priority to remember. You are hurting his feelings big time. Your kids are important, but they will grow up and leave you. If you want him around when they are gone, pay attention to him
We have a REALLY good relationship...and he gets plenty of attention - to the tune of 4 days a week, if you know what I mean.
Sex isn't everything....0 -
Oops...missed the whole thing sorry...glad it went well though...0
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