Sad lady
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Her life, her business. She has to answer for what she does... not you...11
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Once, when I was a work in an office with a long row of cubicles, a co-worker poked her head in to tell me that there was cake in the break room. After she left, I poked my head out to watch her walk up the row of cubicles. My co-worker did not stop to tell anyone else about the cake. I had to ask myself, why did this woman think I was the one who would want to know about cake.
This was a moment of clarity for me. Like another time when I stopped to think about the meaning of the fact that I could not tie my shoes and breathe at the same time. Or when I realized I was a little shorter than baseball player Dustin Pedroia (5'9") and a little heavier than David Ortiz (6'3" 230 lbs).
Watch people eat - who eats the pizza and baked goods; who does not?
If your point is that "skinny" people do not eat pizza and baked goods you are very mistaken.
I THINK the big difference is many "skinny" people will put down the bag of M&M's. I have watched my brother in law. 6'4" 160 soaking wet, pick up a big bag of candy. Have a couple and put it down. N=1 here, but I have trouble stopping. Just my observation.4 -
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Why can't OP just feel bad for the person??? Why does this have to be a condemnation of her?21
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tcunbeliever wrote: »Because other people in the world have an impact on us when we interact with them...because not all those interactions are positive...because why should OP feel compelled to bottle up inside how it made her feel to observe the world and it's people today????
I don't know that watching someone without that person responding to you in any way is the same as interacting with someone. That said, what you wrote is just as true for those of us who telling the OP that what she did was shaming, patronising, and uncalled for.2 -
Why can't OP just feel bad for the person??? Why does this have to be a condemnation of her?
The OP started a thread. If she had felt bad for the person privately no one would know it happened. I also do not see this as condemnation but if the topic is going to be discussed certainly some negative reactions are warranted.
The question is what about the woman deserved to be pitied? The OP has inferred that her statements were lies and that she was ashamed of being overweight/food choices. Is that appropriate or a product of projected bias?
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Once, when I was a work in an office with a long row of cubicles, a co-worker poked her head in to tell me that there was cake in the break room. After she left, I poked my head out to watch her walk up the row of cubicles. My co-worker did not stop to tell anyone else about the cake. I had to ask myself, why did this woman think I was the one who would want to know about cake.
This was a moment of clarity for me. Like another time when I stopped to think about the meaning of the fact that I could not tie my shoes and breathe at the same time. Or when I realized I was a little shorter than baseball player Dustin Pedroia (5'9") and a little heavier than David Ortiz (6'3" 230 lbs).
Watch people eat - who eats the pizza and baked goods; who does not?
I will literally never turn down free pizza or cake. I eat pizza once a week and eat "baked goods" regularly. My BMI is 22 and I've been in maintenance for 2 years. So what conclusions are people supposed to draw?
exactly...if anything I am MORE likely to grab free pizza or cake in the office now, because it's a treat I don't eat all the time whereas those things used to be so commonplace for me that I wouldn't even bother. Pastries are much more appealing to me when I can have one for free and not a box of them in my kitchen. Not to mention how much I felt judged when eating a lot of sweets/rich things in front of people when I was much heavier.8 -
I've lost almost 70 lbs. I still suffer from extreme social anxiety regardless of how I look now. Please don't judge people, you have no idea what they are going through in their lives.24
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psychod787 wrote: »Once, when I was a work in an office with a long row of cubicles, a co-worker poked her head in to tell me that there was cake in the break room. After she left, I poked my head out to watch her walk up the row of cubicles. My co-worker did not stop to tell anyone else about the cake. I had to ask myself, why did this woman think I was the one who would want to know about cake.
This was a moment of clarity for me. Like another time when I stopped to think about the meaning of the fact that I could not tie my shoes and breathe at the same time. Or when I realized I was a little shorter than baseball player Dustin Pedroia (5'9") and a little heavier than David Ortiz (6'3" 230 lbs).
Watch people eat - who eats the pizza and baked goods; who does not?
If your point is that "skinny" people do not eat pizza and baked goods you are very mistaken.
I THINK the big difference is many "skinny" people will put down the bag of M&M's. I have watched my brother in law. 6'4" 160 soaking wet, pick up a big bag of candy. Have a couple and put it down. N=1 here, but I have trouble stopping. Just my observation.
I have seen some "skinny" people hoover down a large bag of M&Ms. I have even known really thin people who struggled to gain weight. The world is an interesting place.7 -
Why can't OP just feel bad for the person??? Why does this have to be a condemnation of her?
The OP started a thread. If she had felt bad for the person privately no one would know it happened. I also do not see this as condemnation but if the topic is going to be discussed certainly some negative reactions are warranted.
The question is what about the woman deserved to be pitied? The OP has inferred that her statements were lies and that she was ashamed of being overweight/food choices. Is that appropriate or a product of projected bias?
I just saw it as an observation. I've been in a similar situation and had similar thoughts. Doesn't mean I was judging the person as inferior or less than.6 -
Why can't OP just feel bad for the person??? Why does this have to be a condemnation of her?
She didn't just feel bad for the person. She came back here to gossip. I would assume so we could all feel superior and pity her together.
If a coworker came into my office and told me that while grabbing their Insta-worthy healthy breakfast out of the fridge they saw one of our obese coworkers in the break room reheating a giant plate of fried food and joking about it to hide their shame, isn't it sad, I would tell them to mind their own damn business and ask them if they wanted anything when I ran out to McD's later to get some Chicken Nuggets. Then I would go tell the obese coworker that the color of her outfit today looks amaze-balls on her and ask her how her day is going.38 -
OK, I didn't take it that way at all. Guess I'll be on my way.
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psychod787 wrote: »Once, when I was a work in an office with a long row of cubicles, a co-worker poked her head in to tell me that there was cake in the break room. After she left, I poked my head out to watch her walk up the row of cubicles. My co-worker did not stop to tell anyone else about the cake. I had to ask myself, why did this woman think I was the one who would want to know about cake.
This was a moment of clarity for me. Like another time when I stopped to think about the meaning of the fact that I could not tie my shoes and breathe at the same time. Or when I realized I was a little shorter than baseball player Dustin Pedroia (5'9") and a little heavier than David Ortiz (6'3" 230 lbs).
Watch people eat - who eats the pizza and baked goods; who does not?
If your point is that "skinny" people do not eat pizza and baked goods you are very mistaken.
I THINK the big difference is many "skinny" people will put down the bag of M&M's. I have watched my brother in law. 6'4" 160 soaking wet, pick up a big bag of candy. Have a couple and put it down. N=1 here, but I have trouble stopping. Just my observation.
I have seen some "skinny" people hoover down a large bag of M&Ms. I have even known really thin people who struggled to gain weight. The world is an interesting place.
True,but what we dont see is if they compensate later.4 -
Why does she feel the need to announce that.
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OK, I didn't take it that way at all. Guess I'll be on my way.
You don't have to leave or anything, but you did ask the question
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OK, I didn't take it that way at all. Guess I'll be on my way.
You don't have to leave or anything, but you did ask the question
I know. But if my interpretation is dramatically different than everyone else's, which is seems to be, then that says something. Either this is a losing battle, or my interpretation is wrong. Either way, this probably isn't the thread for me.7 -
OP, whatever your reasoning for posting this I can’t imagine. I will say this though, try to put yourself in this person’s place as a topic on an Internet forum.20
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psychod787 wrote: »
I’m talking about the woman in line.3
This discussion has been closed.
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