World Mental Health Day
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Im Standing in the Depression and anxiety line. Then I will go over to the emotional eater line.3
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Oh emotional eating is a thing for sure.1
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I have noticed that the worse that I eat and less I get in the gym the more my mind does awful things. Those Oreos may look and taste delicious, but then they tell me that I am a failure and then I feel bad and then I eat more *kitten* Oreos.
Mental health is a big factor in physical health and too many people ignore it. It seems more socially acceptable to say "I am morbidly obese" than to say "I have depression", What is up with that?2 -
LiftingSpirits wrote: »I have noticed that the worse that I eat and less I get in the gym the more my mind does awful things. Those Oreos may look and taste delicious, but then they tell me that I am a failure and then I feel bad and then I eat more *kitten* Oreos.
Mental health is a big factor in physical health and too many people ignore it. It seems more socially acceptable to say "I am morbidly obese" than to say "I have depression", What is up with that?
Maybe not as much now as in prior years, but I think it's difficult to say something like that due to fear of social stigma and also making a claim to something that can't be seen.
I dunno, I could talk at length about my experiences with depression and (for me) its sidecar of anxiety, but I feel like I'm still struggling to figure out precisely how it's affecting me and what I can do to combat it already. I certainly don't feel like an expert on it.
That, and the fact that when it gets bad for me, I think there's pretty much nothing anybody could ever say to "snap" me out of it. Or maybe even "help" in the definition of make-me-feel-better. But at the same time, silence is deafening when you already feel very alone. When I see someone acting in ways that I recognize, I'll usually try to reach out just to make them feel seen...but I still never know what to say. I wouldn't know what to say to ME, let alone someone else? So that's one of the reasons I don't often speak about it.7 -
Reckoner68 wrote: »LiftingSpirits wrote: »I have noticed that the worse that I eat and less I get in the gym the more my mind does awful things. Those Oreos may look and taste delicious, but then they tell me that I am a failure and then I feel bad and then I eat more *kitten* Oreos.
Mental health is a big factor in physical health and too many people ignore it. It seems more socially acceptable to say "I am morbidly obese" than to say "I have depression", What is up with that?
Maybe not as much now as in prior years, but I think it's difficult to say something like that due to fear of social stigma and also making a claim to something that can't be seen.
I dunno, I could talk at length about my experiences with depression and (for me) its sidecar of anxiety, but I feel like I'm still struggling to figure out precisely how it's affecting me and what I can do to combat it already. I certainly don't feel like an expert on it.
That, and the fact that when it gets bad for me, I think there's pretty much nothing anybody could ever say to "snap" me out of it. Or maybe even "help" in the definition of make-me-feel-better. But at the same time, silence is deafening when you already feel very alone. When I see someone acting in ways that I recognize, I'll usually try to reach out just to make them feel seen...but I still never know what to say. I wouldn't know what to say to ME, let alone someone else? So that's one of the reasons I don't often speak about it.
That makes sense. I bottle things up a lot and figure they will just pass. I try to do things that take my mind off of it, but it doesn't always work. I don't want to reach out and beg for attention, but I also don't want to be left alone because I already feel vulnerable. Sometimes when I feel my worst is when I decide to reach out to other people to check on them because I know that a smile does NOT mean that everything is okay and sometimes the "strong" ones aren't at all and are also the people who are less likely to admit when things are bad.3 -
I honestly avoid telling people what mental health illnesses I have. Nowadays everyone is an expert on them, and wants to tell me what it's like to live with them. It is so frustrating. I never talked about it, my family never knew, but my therapist thought it was time to start sharing with a few people because my symptoms are getting so bad sometimes. My sister was great at first, but now she argues with me and tries to tell me I am wrong when I tell her something is going on. My dad flat out just doesn't believe I really have anything.
When I have to miss work, I am always looked down upon. This year I have only missed 3 days, and my boss still acts like I am just ditching for fun. Mind you I am a very experienced procurement manager and my work never suffers because of absences. While an older (65 ish) co worker of mine misses regularly (about 2-4 times a month) and he thinks it's fine because of her age.
I recently got my letter approving me for an emotional support animal from my therapist, and I am really excited to start looking for the right pup. My cat has been an amazing aid to me, and I look forward to potentially limiting my isolation once I have a dog.
The biggest thing I wish people understood is that no two days are the same, and no two people are the same when it comes to these things. I am never looking for someone to pity me, or even understand what I am going through because I don't think anyone can. But I am looking for the respect that these illnesses are real and a lot of people are suffering everyday and we are just looking for some compassion and kindness.
Hugs to all.8 -
i have been dealing with mental health for 21 years, being diagnosed at age nine with crippling anxiety and depression ( i didn't go to grade four, too scared to leave home) i will be 30 next week and all i can say is things do get better.
my mental health does not define me!5 -
LiftingSpirits wrote: »I have noticed that the worse that I eat and less I get in the gym the more my mind does awful things. Those Oreos may look and taste delicious, but then they tell me that I am a failure and then I feel bad and then I eat more *kitten* Oreos.
Mental health is a big factor in physical health and too many people ignore it. It seems more socially acceptable to say "I am morbidly obese" than to say "I have depression", What is up with that?
Same. It's a cycle. Then I turn hermit and shut everyone out. Then I turned to food and become a sloth. It sucks and I have battled it for years.5 -
I am glad to see that famous people are starting to share their stories. The people who don't suffer from mental health issues (and even some that do) think that your life has to be an absolute *kitten* show in order to be depressed. That just isn't true. People who are rich and famous and APPEAR to have it all can be suffering too. I think it empowers people when they realize that it isn't just them, they aren't alone in their struggles.
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Almost all of my immediate family members save 2 suffer from depression. I grew up in a very depressive environment. Everyone was always crying. It was very toxic.
As a teen and adult, I suffered from Seasonal affective disorder at times and went through a couple spells of major depression, but they were due to situations I was in. My last relationship with a narcissist, for example, had me at my lowest point ever. I do feel there is still a lot of hesitance for people to talk about it although probably not as much as before.
I know in my family, the men especially never will seek help, EVER. A lot of people are in denial. But, when you do want help, it is not easy to get. When my sister needed therapy, it was very difficult to find a therapist even with good insurance. There is a shortage and many were not accepting new patients. I had this same problem in the past. My old therapist was so hard to get in with and it was an hour’s drive away. This was in a major city too, where you would think resources would be more abundant.
I actually don’t think medication is the answer for most people. Healing is about mindset a lot of the times. I actually had to stop talking to some family members because they are so negative and detrimental to my growth and healing. I am extremely happy with life now.
As someone who has survived through that, I really feel for people struggling with these things. In the ER, I see many suicide attempts, some successful, even in kids.....which is the worst part.
I do feel that since more people are talking about suicide, that is it becoming more common. I have noticed when there is a celebrity who commits suicide, that we get a flurry of attempts to the ER the next few days.
It also seems that many people aren’t taught coping mechanisms as children. Our society is all about never criticizing anyone, everyone being a winner, etc. I feel this is unhealthy. People are too thin skinned and PC. That is part of the problem. Someone calls you fat and you’re ready to jump off a bridge and end your life. Not ok. I know it is not this simple, but just something I have noticed.
Sorry so long. I wanted to say a lot more but that’s it for now.3 -
I go through cycles like everyone else here - when I’m down I don’t want to bother anyone with my chit cause I feel like I’m bringing them down with me and would rather not be a burden - and I don’t want them to feel like reckoner said above left feeling they didn’t know what to say - so I just internalize my thoughts over think and drink my blues away - eventually a good day comes around - it’s not the most healthy way to deal with things but it’s what I do. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯5
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Almost all of my immediate family members save 2 suffer from depression. I grew up in a very depressive environment. Everyone was always crying. It was very toxic.
As a teen and adult, I suffered from Seasonal affective disorder at times and went through a couple spells of major depression, but they were due to situations I was in. My last relationship with a narcissist, for example, had me at my lowest point ever. I do feel there is still a lot of hesitance for people to talk about it although probably not as much as before.
I know in my family, the men especially never will seek help, EVER. A lot of people are in denial. But, when you do want help, it is not easy to get. When my sister needed therapy, it was very difficult to find a therapist even with good insurance. There is a shortage and many were not accepting new patients. I had this same problem in the past. My old therapist was so hard to get in with and it was an hour’s drive away. This was in a major city too, where you would think resources would be more abundant.
I actually don’t think medication is the answer for most people. Healing is about mindset a lot of the times. I actually had to stop talking to some family members because they are so negative and detrimental to my growth and healing. I am extremely happy with life now.
As someone who has survived through that, I really feel for people struggling with these things. In the ER, I see many suicide attempts, some successful, even in kids.....which is the worst part.
I do feel that since more people are talking about suicide, that is it becoming more common. I have noticed when there is a celebrity who commits suicide, that we get a flurry of attempts to the ER the next few days.
It also seems that many people aren’t taught coping mechanisms as children. Our society is all about never criticizing anyone, everyone being a winner, etc. I feel this is unhealthy. People are too thin skinned and PC. That is part of the problem. Someone calls you fat and you’re ready to jump off a bridge and end your life. Not ok. I know it is not this simple, but just something I have noticed.
Sorry so long. I wanted to say a lot more but that’s it for now.
The last part of this is intriguing and disturbing. It may be harder for kids growing up these days with so much pressure and social media. Things that wouldn't have been issues back in the day are so in your face now. Just think about filters and selfies. And the unneeded pressure to be "perfect" when what you see online isn't even "real" most the time.5 -
Almost all of my immediate family members save 2 suffer from depression. I grew up in a very depressive environment. Everyone was always crying. It was very toxic.
As a teen and adult, I suffered from Seasonal affective disorder at times and went through a couple spells of major depression, but they were due to situations I was in. My last relationship with a narcissist, for example, had me at my lowest point ever. I do feel there is still a lot of hesitance for people to talk about it although probably not as much as before.
I know in my family, the men especially never will seek help, EVER. A lot of people are in denial. But, when you do want help, it is not easy to get. When my sister needed therapy, it was very difficult to find a therapist even with good insurance. There is a shortage and many were not accepting new patients. I had this same problem in the past. My old therapist was so hard to get in with and it was an hour’s drive away. This was in a major city too, where you would think resources would be more abundant.
I actually don’t think medication is the answer for most people. Healing is about mindset a lot of the times. I actually had to stop talking to some family members because they are so negative and detrimental to my growth and healing. I am extremely happy with life now.
As someone who has survived through that, I really feel for people struggling with these things. In the ER, I see many suicide attempts, some successful, even in kids.....which is the worst part.
I do feel that since more people are talking about suicide, that is it becoming more common. I have noticed when there is a celebrity who commits suicide, that we get a flurry of attempts to the ER the next few days.
It also seems that many people aren’t taught coping mechanisms as children. Our society is all about never criticizing anyone, everyone being a winner, etc. I feel this is unhealthy. People are too thin skinned and PC. That is part of the problem. Someone calls you fat and you’re ready to jump off a bridge and end your life. Not ok. I know it is not this simple, but just something I have noticed.
Sorry so long. I wanted to say a lot more but that’s it for now.
The last part of this is intriguing and disturbing. It may be harder for kids growing up these days with so much pressure and social media. Things that wouldn't have been issues back in the day are so in your face now. Just think about filters and selfies. And the unneeded pressure to be "perfect" when what you see online isn't even "real" most the time.
I 100% agree. I feel kids should not have cell phones or access to social media also. If there is a bully, they can’t even really escape because now they are being *cyber-bullied*. But, I feel parents have to teach their kids to be a little stronger.
I am so very against filters and photo-shop for this very reason. I know some people think it is fun and innocent to turn yourself into a deer or bunny and things but the whole concept is very detrimental to people in the long run. I’m also very anti-fake anything like implants, lashes, etc.
People see these images and think that beauty is real and it isn’t. It is pure fakery. But kids and adults too are too naive to realize this a lot of the times or even if people know it is fake, they are still influenced and feel pressure to live up to that fake standard.
I have talked to many men who actually believe some of these insta models are real and that body type is realistic for the average woman if they just work out or use a waist trainer. I actually had an ex pressure me to get plastic surgery. If I would just get _____, I would be perfect. No thanks. Needless to say, he’s an ex.
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Almost all of my immediate family members save 2 suffer from depression. I grew up in a very depressive environment. Everyone was always crying. It was very toxic.
As a teen and adult, I suffered from Seasonal affective disorder at times and went through a couple spells of major depression, but they were due to situations I was in. My last relationship with a narcissist, for example, had me at my lowest point ever. I do feel there is still a lot of hesitance for people to talk about it although probably not as much as before.
I know in my family, the men especially never will seek help, EVER. A lot of people are in denial. But, when you do want help, it is not easy to get. When my sister needed therapy, it was very difficult to find a therapist even with good insurance. There is a shortage and many were not accepting new patients. I had this same problem in the past. My old therapist was so hard to get in with and it was an hour’s drive away. This was in a major city too, where you would think resources would be more abundant.
I actually don’t think medication is the answer for most people. Healing is about mindset a lot of the times. I actually had to stop talking to some family members because they are so negative and detrimental to my growth and healing. I am extremely happy with life now.
As someone who has survived through that, I really feel for people struggling with these things. In the ER, I see many suicide attempts, some successful, even in kids.....which is the worst part.
I do feel that since more people are talking about suicide, that is it becoming more common. I have noticed when there is a celebrity who commits suicide, that we get a flurry of attempts to the ER the next few days.
It also seems that many people aren’t taught coping mechanisms as children. Our society is all about never criticizing anyone, everyone being a winner, etc. I feel this is unhealthy. People are too thin skinned and PC. That is part of the problem. Someone calls you fat and you’re ready to jump off a bridge and end your life. Not ok. I know it is not this simple, but just something I have noticed.
Sorry so long. I wanted to say a lot more but that’s it for now.
The last part of this is intriguing and disturbing. It may be harder for kids growing up these days with so much pressure and social media. Things that wouldn't have been issues back in the day are so in your face now. Just think about filters and selfies. And the unneeded pressure to be "perfect" when what you see online isn't even "real" most the time.
I think it is harder on them and because the internet has opened our eyes to some of the horrific things out there I think parents also overprotect kids. We don't know the balance. You let your child walk to the bus stop and they may never be seen again. Do you take that risk or do you walk them or drive them until they are driving themselves?
You don't let your kids use social media at all and then they feel like an outsider and are treated like one. They can become hermits themselves because they aren't in the know and people don't invite them to do things. You do let them use it and you open them up to all sorts of other terrible. There really is no perfect solution.5 -
One year I was depressed and someone told me not to be sad anymore.3
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While I've found that I can talk about it without quite as much stigma, it's still something I don't talk about with many others, especially IRL, because the few times I've tried, things become awkward. Following up with me asking if things are getting better is sort of nice I guess in the way that it's nice they care, but when you're in the black hole that's inside the neverending chasm of emptiness and stuck there, it's really hard to relate, and feeling like I'm being an Eeyore and bringing my black raincloud over everyone doesn't help me or them feel better. And shoot, even with the people I talk to about having mental illness, I don't go into much detail -- my mind tends to be a creatively terrifying place when I'm any more than knee-deep in the struggle. The few times I've talked about my anxiety has only seemed to make people worried about talking about stuff with me (primarily food/social anxiety for me), so I don't really talk much about that anymore.
A few of the people in my life are more understanding and insightful and can tell if I'm going down the worst roads in my mind, and they check in and ask me what I need at the moment (not how I am, unless it's to check on my "IDGAF index", which is the indicator of what level of care/intervention I need at the moment). The caveat of this is I'm not sure what to tell them, and sometimes truly don't know what I need. For instance, isolation helps me in some ways, yet it's supposed to be avoided/minimalized when going through the worst times. Or I'll be in an especially apathetic mood and brush them off or minimalize it, and they'll often be none the wiser for it. I don't really have anyone in my regular life who is willing to be a true cheerleader/coach, so yeah... sticking to the professional treatment methods for the most part, and attempting to float along for the rest of it.
Not sure if this was coherently written or not, but I guess it's what I've come up with for the topic.2 -
tinkerhellraiser wrote: »LiftingSpirits wrote: »I am glad to see that famous people are starting to share their stories. The people who don't suffer from mental health issues (and even some that do) think that your life has to be an absolute *kitten* show in order to be depressed. That just isn't true. People who are rich and famous and APPEAR to have it all can be suffering too. I think it empowers people when they realize that it isn't just them, they aren't alone in their struggles.
well there’s situational depression and then there’s chemically depressed, like when life’s a *kitten* show and u sad about it or the sun is shining and youre with people u love and u still sad about it
for whatever reason, i am a sad person. idk if it’s some of the things that happened to me or some way i *kitten* up my brain with drugs, but if it weren’t for my kids i would’ve killed myself by now, no doubt.
^^ and if i say things like that irl people will tell me “yOu ShOulD tAlK tO sOmEbOdy”, as if i haven’t gone to therapy, learned coping mechanisms, tried pills, everything. like i realize dark thoughts are not good
i have friends who struggle too and their empathy and shoulder to lean on helps more than therapy ever did, but like @Cowsfan1 said, i dont want to wear people out. so sometimes i just act like i all better and give everyone a break
Yeah, it's difficult to find the line between "looking out for others" and "self care". It's easy to talk about it but after you've let some people in and seen how letting them in eventually tears them up, there's a part of you that just starts saying "Hey--trust me, you don't want a part of this. I like you, and you don't deserve this" so you end up bottling everything, knowing full well it's "not healthy" either but what can you do?
The whole thing is poop. Depression, anxiety, it's just no good (and you can quote me on that)3 -
Reckoner68 wrote: »tinkerhellraiser wrote: »LiftingSpirits wrote: »I am glad to see that famous people are starting to share their stories. The people who don't suffer from mental health issues (and even some that do) think that your life has to be an absolute *kitten* show in order to be depressed. That just isn't true. People who are rich and famous and APPEAR to have it all can be suffering too. I think it empowers people when they realize that it isn't just them, they aren't alone in their struggles.
well there’s situational depression and then there’s chemically depressed, like when life’s a *kitten* show and u sad about it or the sun is shining and youre with people u love and u still sad about it
for whatever reason, i am a sad person. idk if it’s some of the things that happened to me or some way i *kitten* up my brain with drugs, but if it weren’t for my kids i would’ve killed myself by now, no doubt.
^^ and if i say things like that irl people will tell me “yOu ShOulD tAlK tO sOmEbOdy”, as if i haven’t gone to therapy, learned coping mechanisms, tried pills, everything. like i realize dark thoughts are not good
i have friends who struggle too and their empathy and shoulder to lean on helps more than therapy ever did, but like @Cowsfan1 said, i dont want to wear people out. so sometimes i just act like i all better and give everyone a break
Yeah, it's difficult to find the line between "looking out for others" and "self care". It's easy to talk about it but after you've let some people in and seen how letting them in eventually tears them up, there's a part of you that just starts saying "Hey--trust me, you don't want a part of this. I like you, and you don't deserve this" so you end up bottling everything, knowing full well it's "not healthy" either but what can you do?
The whole thing is poop. Depression, anxiety, it's just no good (and you can quote me on that)
You said I could. So I did3 -
A wise philosopher once said the whole depression/anxiety thing is poop or something to that effect and i think that sums it up quite accurately. I struggled for years. YEARS. Before i let go of the stigma surrounding meds. Now i will preach it to anyone who will listen that those drugs are life changing. I’m not ignorant of their shortcomings, but when you can’t summon the energy to do all the life changes required to battle depression without meds (much less stick with those changes for months before seeing any relief) then the drugs are a literal lifesaver.
People are entitled to their own opinions as to the safety or efficacy of those drugs, of course, but i do wish those opinions weren’t advertised so freely. It cements the ‘drugs are for the weak’ stigma that i, for one, was in bondage to unnecessarily and for way too long.5 -
Reckoner68 wrote: »tinkerhellraiser wrote: »LiftingSpirits wrote: »I am glad to see that famous people are starting to share their stories. The people who don't suffer from mental health issues (and even some that do) think that your life has to be an absolute *kitten* show in order to be depressed. That just isn't true. People who are rich and famous and APPEAR to have it all can be suffering too. I think it empowers people when they realize that it isn't just them, they aren't alone in their struggles.
well there’s situational depression and then there’s chemically depressed, like when life’s a *kitten* show and u sad about it or the sun is shining and youre with people u love and u still sad about it
for whatever reason, i am a sad person. idk if it’s some of the things that happened to me or some way i *kitten* up my brain with drugs, but if it weren’t for my kids i would’ve killed myself by now, no doubt.
^^ and if i say things like that irl people will tell me “yOu ShOulD tAlK tO sOmEbOdy”, as if i haven’t gone to therapy, learned coping mechanisms, tried pills, everything. like i realize dark thoughts are not good
i have friends who struggle too and their empathy and shoulder to lean on helps more than therapy ever did, but like @Cowsfan1 said, i dont want to wear people out. so sometimes i just act like i all better and give everyone a break
Yeah, it's difficult to find the line between "looking out for others" and "self care". It's easy to talk about it but after you've let some people in and seen how letting them in eventually tears them up, there's a part of you that just starts saying "Hey--trust me, you don't want a part of this. I like you, and you don't deserve this" so you end up bottling everything, knowing full well it's "not healthy" either but what can you do?
The whole thing is poop. Depression, anxiety, it's just no good (and you can quote me on that)
You said I could. So I did
You....seem to have won, heh.1
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