We've all done
MovingRumsAss
Posts: 24 Member
You know you have done it. You're out with family at a place without any great options for your particular diet and go for it or were on a diet for health reasons and thought one day won't hurt. So here you are miserable and wondering what were you thinking. What is your recovery (being nice to yourself) meal?
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Replies
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A huge salad with tuna or chicken as the protein and homemade salad dressing that's lower cal and tastier than bottled.5
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MovingRumsAss wrote: »You know you have done it. You're out with family at a place without any great options for your particular diet and go for it or were on a diet for health reasons and thought one day won't hurt. So here you are miserable and wondering what were you thinking. What is your recovery (being nice to yourself) meal?
I don't have or need one. Social days happen and I work with them as I can. I pick the best options available and don't feel obligated to eat all the things, so I'm not miserable about my choices. I just go back to my normal routine the next day.
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I don't follow a specific diet, just stick to my calories, so I can eat an appropriate meal anywhere.
If I overdo it, I just get right back on plan tomorrow. It's what you do most of the time that matters. One meal really can't ruin anything unless you use it for an excuse to go off the rails. And you shouldn't let one meal make you miserable :drinker:13 -
I just go back to my normal routine the next day. I don't believe in obsessing about one off cheat meals at social gatherings. Sure it might get me off track for a day or so but I just embrace it as part of the process.7
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I just spent a weekend at distance family's house. I had no control of what they cooked/served. I had control of how much I put on my plate and didn't go back for seconds. I enjoyed the piece of pie they offered (because they were the kind that would have been insulted if I'd turned it down and I know one piece of pie isn't going to derail my weight loss). I made sure I did get my steps in for the day, enjoyed every bite I ate, and relaxed while getting to know family I hadn't seen in 40ish years.
Tomorrow, I continue on as I had been without worrying over what I ate this weekend or that I went over my calories a little yesterday. No biggie.7 -
If I choose to eat over my calorie goal, then I'm going to enjoy doing it, not be miserable afterwards. It's just food, not sin; there's no need for expiation.
Usually, I look at menus before I go out, and decide what to order that way, so I'm prepared and not needing to make a snap decision. I'll even look it up in the car on the way there, as long as I'm not driving. But a rare day when I eat over goal, even over maintenance calories, even waaaaay over maintenance calories . . . it really isn't a big deal.
During weight loss, when one's overall on a weight down-trend, it really, really, really isn't a big deal: It's just a day or two delay in reaching goal weight at worst (usually), and sometimes that tradeoff is totally worth it. (If I decide afterward it wasn't worth it, I think about how to improve the situation next time, rehearse that new script in my head a couple of times, then let it go and go on with life). I don't see the point in "making up for it" somehow.
Even now, in maintenance (year 4+ at a healthy weight), I don't stress about a rare over-goal day. It just doesn't have much impact . . . as long as it stays rare, not frequent.9 -
My recovery meal is usually oatmeal because it's important to get right back to it, and oatmeal is my usual habit for breakfast. It feels like once I start my day off with that, the rest of the day follows pretty naturally.
Yeh, don't let one meal take you away from your long term goals. And don't beat yourself up about it, it's life and it happens. You certainly don't want to always deprive yourself either.2 -
Oh when I'm out I go all out. I don't go out often so for me it's a treat! But if I have overdone the food a bit then I usually just go back to eating normally, so toast for breakfast or pancakes if it's the weekend. I might cut out a meal or get an extra good lifting session in, but I don't focus on it too much since it all works out overtime as long as I get back on track.4
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When I "go for it" it's usually on purpose. I either have pre-planned for it, have a backup plan for it, or have decided to have a high calorie day without making up for it. My diet has zero restrictions other than judging if a food is worth the calories, so I'm never really "off plan". My food choices when going out usually boil down to "what do I feel like eating today" and I always decide what I want to eat before I go if that's an option, but I rarely take diet into consideration (unless I don't know what I want and several choices look appealing, I'll take the lower calorie one). Given that I do this with intention I don't really regret it or feel miserable.
I have had times when I lost control over my calories and overate when I wasn't planning to. Usually when I'm having a long back pain episode and can't move as much as I'm used to (which means I have fewer calories to play with). It sucks, but I just remind myself that it's okay and that I will be back up and running (literally) in no time and re-lose any weight I gained within a few weeks and it will be as if it never happened.4 -
I should add that I have been trying to stay gluten free and this weekend I got sick instantly. So I'm not as worried about the calories as much as that meal where you have eaten the "old way" and regretted it.0
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For me messing up is about eating something that makes me sick, not calorie counts. I tend to eat something nice and non-controversial for me if I"m having a flare, and just wait out the reaction and not do that again.2
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MovingRumsAss wrote: »I should add that I have been trying to stay gluten free and this weekend I got sick instantly. So I'm not as worried about the calories as much as that meal where you have eaten the "old way" and regretted it.
My "old ways" are my "new ways" lol.
The foods I eat now are the same foods I ate before, the only difference is how I manage those foods (quantity, frequency, assortment...etc).
If you're talking about regretting eating something you shouldn't for health reasons, then I feel you. It can feel unfair. I had to begrudgingly reduce my egg intake to a minimum because of sensitivity. I had a few "woe is me" tantrums in my head at first and felt it was unfair. Now I'm surprisingly fine with having eggs only occasionally. With the amount of sulking I did, you'd imagine it would be hard, but it surprisingly didn't take long to get used to. I was a bit stubborn at times and had eggs more often than I'm supposed to and had to wait out the discomfort. Hopefully, you will get used to it eventually and such slip ups will happen less often.1 -
MovingRumsAss wrote: »I should add that I have been trying to stay gluten free and this weekend I got sick instantly. So I'm not as worried about the calories as much as that meal where you have eaten the "old way" and regretted it.
If it's because of a genuine gluten intolerance or celiac (which aren't that common), then whatever you need to do to feel physically better. Emotions shouldn't be part of it except perhaps understanding why you ate in a way that you knew would cause physical discomfort, so as to try to learn how not to do it again -- and shaming yourself IMO is not useful for that.
If it's a diet for weight loss or just because, I would just get back to it, as others said, and if you really overdid it and it was a restriction that you imposed only for weight loss reasons, I might think through whether the restriction led to overdoing it -- whether a less restrictive diet that accomplished the same goals (such as weight loss) might lead to less difficulty.
Personally, I usually eat a little lighter leading up to a dinner out when I think I will eat more than usual. If for some reason I didn't -- like it was unplanned -- I do often eat a bit lighter the day after, but I don't feel shame or punish myself, and I don't feel like I have to be really restrictive the next day to make up for it or anything. If I ate differently than I had planned (i.e., I'd intended to do one thing in the situation and did not), I might consider why that was, as that can be helpful going forward.5 -
MovingRumsAss wrote: »I should add that I have been trying to stay gluten free and this weekend I got sick instantly. So I'm not as worried about the calories as much as that meal where you have eaten the "old way" and regretted it.
If it's because of a genuine gluten intolerance or celiac (which aren't that common), then whatever you need to do to feel physically better. Emotions shouldn't be part of it except perhaps understanding why you ate in a way that you knew would cause physical discomfort, so as to try to learn how not to do it again -- and shaming yourself IMO is not useful for that.
If it's a diet for weight loss or just because, I would just get back to it, as others said, and if you really overdid it and it was a restriction that you imposed only for weight loss reasons, I might think through whether the restriction led to overdoing it -- whether a less restrictive diet that accomplished the same goals (such as weight loss) might lead to less difficulty.
Personally, I usually eat a little lighter leading up to a dinner out when I think I will eat more than usual. If for some reason I didn't -- like it was unplanned -- I do often eat a bit lighter the day after, but I don't feel shame or punish myself, and I don't feel like I have to be really restrictive the next day to make up for it or anything. If I ate differently than I had planned (i.e., I'd intended to do one thing in the situation and did not), I might consider why that was, as that can be helpful going forward.
The short answer is unfortunately yes. The dr suspects gluten intolerance (not celiac) and you are correct it is rare but not as rare with someone with other autoimmune diseases. I have lupus; yes it sucks but it's my reality. Another rare thing that occurred was a vertebral artery dissection while exercising 2 years ago. So all the weight I lost and all the muscle I gained was lost and here I am starting over.
We were out and needed something quick and I just didn't feel like having to go in circles to find a place that I could eat at for breakfast
"Miserable" was my stomach hurting from not eating right. I ended up with some uncured sausage and roasted veggies for my recovery meal and this morning is Greek yogurt while I drink my coffee.3 -
For me personally, there's a big difference between eating more calories than my daily goal (which I sometimes choose to do) and eating things that I know will make me feel sick (which I don't do).
For the first, it's my choice so I don't feel guilt. One meal isn't going to make a difference to my long term plans.
For the second, if this was something I was doing, I think I'd figure out why. Was I feeling frustrated at my dietary limitations? Did I not advocate for myself and my health needs when my family was choosing a restaurant? Do I have a pattern of eating in ways that sabotage my health?3 -
Typically if I'm eating the "wrong things" while out, I won't have hit my protein macro. One day won't kill me, but if it was lunch, I might try to get closer to the range I want by grabbing a protein bar or shake when I get back to my office or home. Long term, it doesn't really make a difference, but short term, I might be really hungry really fast without the protein add on.0
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janejellyroll wrote: »For me personally, there's a big difference between eating more calories than my daily goal (which I sometimes choose to do) and eating things that I know will make me feel sick (which I don't do).
For the first, it's my choice so I don't feel guilt. One meal isn't going to make a difference to my long term plans.
For the second, if this was something I was doing, I think I'd figure out why. Was I feeling frustrated at my dietary limitations? Did I not advocate for myself and my health needs when my family was choosing a restaurant? Do I have a pattern of eating in ways that sabotage my health?
^^^ This all day long.
If you have dietary restrictions for health reasons, it's up to you to find out if a restaurant can accommodate your needs. Check if there's a menu online. If your family is picking a restaurant that can't or won't accommodate you, speak up and find an alternative that will. If your family is ordering the meal 'family style' and it doesn't meet your needs then order and pay for your meal individually. Take charge of your health so you don't need to recover from spending time with your family.3 -
For me it's usually the opposite. I usually know in advance if I'm going to enjoy myself so I plan for it. This doesn't happen often however. Usually it's my only meal for that day and/or I've banked calories during the week and/or I get in some extra cardio.
My calories almost always balances out for the entire week so that one meal over doesn't slow down my progress.
I almost always gain extra water weight, but it goes away in a couple of days.
The next day is business as usual.3 -
MovingRumsAss wrote: »MovingRumsAss wrote: »I should add that I have been trying to stay gluten free and this weekend I got sick instantly. So I'm not as worried about the calories as much as that meal where you have eaten the "old way" and regretted it.
If it's because of a genuine gluten intolerance or celiac (which aren't that common), then whatever you need to do to feel physically better. Emotions shouldn't be part of it except perhaps understanding why you ate in a way that you knew would cause physical discomfort, so as to try to learn how not to do it again -- and shaming yourself IMO is not useful for that.
If it's a diet for weight loss or just because, I would just get back to it, as others said, and if you really overdid it and it was a restriction that you imposed only for weight loss reasons, I might think through whether the restriction led to overdoing it -- whether a less restrictive diet that accomplished the same goals (such as weight loss) might lead to less difficulty.
Personally, I usually eat a little lighter leading up to a dinner out when I think I will eat more than usual. If for some reason I didn't -- like it was unplanned -- I do often eat a bit lighter the day after, but I don't feel shame or punish myself, and I don't feel like I have to be really restrictive the next day to make up for it or anything. If I ate differently than I had planned (i.e., I'd intended to do one thing in the situation and did not), I might consider why that was, as that can be helpful going forward.
The short answer is unfortunately yes. The dr suspects gluten intolerance (not celiac) and you are correct it is rare but not as rare with someone with other autoimmune diseases. I have lupus; yes it sucks but it's my reality. Another rare thing that occurred was a vertebral artery dissection while exercising 2 years ago. So all the weight I lost and all the muscle I gained was lost and here I am starting over.
We were out and needed something quick and I just didn't feel like having to go in circles to find a place that I could eat at for breakfast
"Miserable" was my stomach hurting from not eating right. I ended up with some uncured sausage and roasted veggies for my recovery meal and this morning is Greek yogurt while I drink my coffee.
MovingRumsAss, it was not at all clear to me, even on a re-read, that your OP was talking about an actual dietary-related health problem (medically diagnosed disease or condition) rather than a general "eating well for my health" statement (something we often see around here); nor was it clear that "feeling miserable" was feeling physically sick vs. guilty, like a failure, etc. (also something we often see around here).
I think most of us have not "done that", eat in a way that aggravates a medical condition, because I don't think the average person has major, acute, health-relevant dietary restrictions.
I'm sorry that I misunderstood, because my advice would've been different.
I agree, mostly, with the "tough love" recommendations above, that it will be up to you to put your health (not feeling sick) at the priority that seems right to you, and own the consequences of your behavior in that context.
I'd add this: I have a non-standard diet (vegetarian) by preference, but I've had it so long (45 years) that I do tend to experience mild digestive distress if I accidentally eat meat products (sometimes, the distress is what leads me to later discover that, say, a casserole or soup had a good bit of chicken broth in it). The distress isn't why I avoid meat, but I don't ever intentionally eat it.
Sometimes, when dining with groups, I do accede to restaurant choices that will please my companions, but greatly limit my choices. In those cases, I still review the menu in advance if at all possible. Part of what I do is look for the menu choices that are closest to a thing I would eat. Then, at the restaurant, I'll be that annoying person saying "can you leave the chicken off the salad? make the sandwich without the ham? make me a plate of the veggie sides? give me a hard-boiled egg?" etc.
Generally, most wait-staff and restaurants can and will accommodate special diets if asked politely.
If you don't want to have that conversation in front of your family/friends, excuse yourself as if to visit the restroom, and talk to a staff person away from the table. (I have no problem doing it in front of people, even those who don't know me well enough to be kind and accommodating about it because they truly care about my preferences and well-being.)
If you chose to eat food that makes you feel ill, that's a decision. The things you should do afterward to feel better - what you should eat, or other things that might help - are likely to be quite individual. If your OP had been "I slipped and ate gluten, to which I'm sensitive, and that made me feel ill: What can I do to recover?" then you might get replies from others who are gluten sensitive or celiac, who might have more useful ideas.
If the question is how to cope with a special diet in a restaurant, my advice would be to figure out what you can eat that won't aggravate your health condition (asking for modifications if necessary), and order that, even if the things others are eating look really tempting, and lots of the menu choices (maybe all) are unsuitable as written. Or, order a beverage, enjoy the social time, and eat later.
Best wishes!
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Progresso lite Italian Wedding Soup. It’s only 160 calories for a whole can. But then again, I’d eat it anyway because I’m addicted to the stuff.0
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MovingRumsAss wrote: »You know you have done it. You're out with family at a place without any great options for your particular diet and go for it or were on a diet for health reasons and thought one day won't hurt. So here you are miserable and wondering what were you thinking. What is your recovery (being nice to yourself) meal?
I don't really follow any specific diet. I eat well for the most part, but I also like to indulge in pizza or pub grub or whatever some times. These things don't make me feel miserable...it's part of enjoying life and in reality, one day doesn't hurt anything. I tend to look at my nutrition in terms of the big picture. Having pizza and movie night on Fridays, for example, doesn't undo the nutrition I've had throughout the week.0 -
MovingRumsAss wrote: »You know you have done it. You're out with family at a place without any great options for your particular diet and go for it or were on a diet for health reasons and thought one day won't hurt. So here you are miserable and wondering what were you thinking. What is your recovery (being nice to yourself) meal?
My family usually manages to decrease my appetite so I rarely have this problem whether this was meant to be about health or calories.5 -
I don't understand; recovering from what? Eating something?0
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