Sorry babe. That's a deal-breaker
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The_Usual_Suspects wrote: »The_Usual_Suspects wrote: »If she has photos of herself kissing another guy or getting all cutesy with him. Either clean that up, you haven't moved on and have no business talking to me, or you're ho'in around 😐
If you guys are only in the only talking stage, she’s allowed to keep her options open. So are you.
Maybe you are rightTwitchyMacGee wrote: »The_Usual_Suspects wrote: »If she has photos of herself kissing another guy or getting all cutesy with him. Either clean that up, you haven't moved on and have no business talking to me, or you're ho'in around 😐
I’m assuming you’re youngish and have only lived in the digital age.
I have actual photographs of people I haven’t heard from in 20, 30 years. Imo it would be wrong to expect someone who has had a life to get rid of those mementos.
At what point does it cross the line? Hypothetical situation: me and her got serious and in the future decide to get married. Still acceptable for her to keep photos of her kissing her ex? For me personally, that doesn't sit well.
Each to his own I guess but to me, asking me to amputate my history, my memories, to deny that they are part of me is a deal-breaking kind of possessiveness and insecurity.
Exes who were part of a friend group, exes with whom one co-parents and with whom one shares family memories, childhood sweethearts who are embedded in the narrative of our pasts - you can’t erase these.
ETA: I used to feel like you. The man I married had a girlfriend before me. He’d been with her for six years and she was very much a part of his life. His parents and sisters loved her. She’d been to all the family weddings and celebrations and her photo was everywhere. I pitched fits about it and had evidence of her systematically removed.
In hindsight it it was foolish of me to be jealous. It only hurt me (eta: and made him crazy). He loved me and his family fully embraced me. And whether the photos exist or not, it doesn’t change the fact that she was there.3 -
I think the main dealbreaker for me is if they lack respect for me, thus unable to communicate effectively in the relationship and treat me as an equal. I’ve found individuals who are incapable of this usually cannot be truly intimate and form any real connection, and are prone to being very abusive.2
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The_Usual_Suspects wrote: »The_Usual_Suspects wrote: »If she has photos of herself kissing another guy or getting all cutesy with him. Either clean that up, you haven't moved on and have no business talking to me, or you're ho'in around 😐
If you guys are only in the only talking stage, she’s allowed to keep her options open. So are you.
Maybe you are rightTwitchyMacGee wrote: »The_Usual_Suspects wrote: »If she has photos of herself kissing another guy or getting all cutesy with him. Either clean that up, you haven't moved on and have no business talking to me, or you're ho'in around 😐
I’m assuming you’re youngish and have only lived in the digital age.
I have actual photographs of people I haven’t heard from in 20, 30 years. Imo it would be wrong to expect someone who has had a life to get rid of those mementos.
At what point does it cross the line? Hypothetical situation: me and her got serious and in the future decide to get married. Still acceptable for her to keep photos of her kissing her ex? For me personally, that doesn't sit well.
It probably depends on where she was kissing him.
You know, were they at the beach?
.....or somewhere really exotic, like Toledo.
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The_Usual_Suspects wrote: »The_Usual_Suspects wrote: »If she has photos of herself kissing another guy or getting all cutesy with him. Either clean that up, you haven't moved on and have no business talking to me, or you're ho'in around 😐
If you guys are only in the only talking stage, she’s allowed to keep her options open. So are you.
Maybe you are rightTwitchyMacGee wrote: »The_Usual_Suspects wrote: »If she has photos of herself kissing another guy or getting all cutesy with him. Either clean that up, you haven't moved on and have no business talking to me, or you're ho'in around 😐
I’m assuming you’re youngish and have only lived in the digital age.
I have actual photographs of people I haven’t heard from in 20, 30 years. Imo it would be wrong to expect someone who has had a life to get rid of those mementos.
At what point does it cross the line? Hypothetical situation: me and her got serious and in the future decide to get married. Still acceptable for her to keep photos of her kissing her ex? For me personally, that doesn't sit well.
I don’t understand why it would be important to keep pictures of you and your exes kissing. I understand if it were candid pictures of you two on vacation, you doing something like.. canoeing or whatever and he/she just happened to be in the picture. But for someone to think it’s so important to keep pictures of memories of them kissing, I don’t get that part. I think that part is fair to ask them to delete if it’s that bothersome.0 -
Pronouncing spaghetti as sghetti.2
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A guy that is arrogant. I love confidence but arrogance is a huge turn off.2
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Grown men who play video games still is a real turn off..gives me sideeye but it can pass as long as he doesn’t take it that seriously..starts slamming *kitten*, yelling at the screen or loses track of time.
Better yet, plays with people online and starts cursing at them and calling them all sorts of pu$$ees.
😑2 -
An Irish accent !!! Swooooooon !0
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Gross toenails, ewww0
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bidingmytime wrote: »
Sooo, you're saying an Irish accent is a deal breaker? 🤔
Or were these meant for the weakness thread?0 -
not giving me space0
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Giving and accepting gifts from another woman 🤯2
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slimgirljo15 wrote: »
Sooo, you're saying an Irish accent is a deal breaker? 🤔
I was agreeing with @Kimberleyb81 that Irish accents make me swoon. Not a deal breaker in the least. Exact opposite, in fact!
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bidingmytime wrote: »slimgirljo15 wrote: »
Sooo, you're saying an Irish accent is a deal breaker? 🤔
I was agreeing with @Kimberleyb81 that Irish accents make me swoon. Not a deal breaker in the least. Exact opposite, in fact!
Ohhh, .. I see 🙂 I just thought as it's the deal breaker thread. I think maybe she meant it for the my weakness in opposite sex thread ( whatever it's called)
And I totally agree Irish accent *swoon*0 -
Grown men who play video games still is a real turn off..gives me sideeye but it can pass as long as he doesn’t take it that seriously..starts slamming *kitten*, yelling at the screen or loses track of time.
Better yet, plays with people online and starts cursing at them and calling them all sorts of pu$$ees.
😑
Husband and I play video games together. However the freaking out, slamming and verbal abuse are very immature and not okay.3 -
Husband and I play video games together. However the freaking out, slamming and verbal abuse are very immature and not okay.
I remember pulling all-nighters and playing games to the point that I'd become irate when I couldn't get past a certain level. When I see viral videos nowadays of kids acting out while playing games, I understand to some extent how video games can flip some sort of switch in a person's mind and make them go cuckoo bananas.
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