Online Relationships

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I know this is becoming a new trend now & there are some online couples who do ended up in each other's arms. I have a current online relationship with someone from Spain that I met & chatted for more than 2 years. Although he seems very serious (he already has plans of settling down with me) & sincere with me but sometimes I get worred that this will not work out later on since he is in Spain & I currently living in an Asian country. Just want to know what are your opinions on this kind of relationship?
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  • sarah44254
    sarah44254 Posts: 3,078 Member
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    I feel like it is as unpredictable as any other relationship is. I have had nearby relationships, and online/far off relationships. Just so happens that the one I have been in for the past 4 years (and happy in!:smile:) was started as an online one.

    Treat it as you would a relationship with someone down the road from you, it has the same potential, both good and bad.
  • lor007
    lor007 Posts: 884 Member
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    I'm sure it could work, but eventually one of you would have to uproot unless you are both content with never meeting face to face.
  • Lindz2323
    Lindz2323 Posts: 261 Member
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    I know my situation is different because I live in the states and the boyfriend I'm with now also lives here in the states but we met online years ago, and finally met in person in 2009. we've been together ever since and he moved here to Colorado (He lived in North Carolina before), so I do believe things can work out! What you should figure out before hand is which of you would be willing to move to the other place because it will essentially come down to that! But I'm happy for you! I do believe online relationships can work, since I'm proof it has worked for me! I love my boyfriend very much and he had no problem moving here for me once we met in person. He has a job here now and he LOVES it here. =) I'm just glad things worked out in the end. I would have moved to NC for him too, but he likes it here better so it all worked out! I wish you the best!!! Good luck! =)
  • Dtho5159
    Dtho5159 Posts: 1,054 Member
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    Im biased :laugh: I met my husband online in November 2002 and we have been together ever since.
  • TrishJimenez
    TrishJimenez Posts: 561 Member
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    It depends on whether one of you is planning on/willing to relocate for the sake of the relationship. I had a really good friend that was in a long term relationship with someone where they were even living together and engaged to be married. She had to move out of town for personal reasons and he planed on joining her. But eventually they broke up bcuz he just deep down didnt want to move and she couldnt move back to where he lived and it ended the relationship after a period of time. Sooo....to me that seems to be the biggest issue facing you two
  • ajbeans
    ajbeans Posts: 2,857 Member
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    I met my husband online in 1999. Yay for random AIM chats! (Does anybody even use AIM anymore? :laugh:) I agree with the person who said they can be as unpredictable as any other relationship. The biggest downside is not getting to spend any time together in person. Yes, any person can be a liar, in-person or online, but I think it's easier to hide stuff from behind a computer screen. That said, I'm all about throwing caution to the wind for love. Keep your heart guarded only as much as you realize that this relationship could fail just like any other relationship could fail, and have the confidence in yourself that you can be self-sufficient -- don't pin your everything on one person, whether online or down the street. And don't use up all your life savings uprooting your life unless you're sure you can come back home if need be, or make a life for yourself there if the relationship goes south. But if you have real feelings for him, and you feel like the relationship is strong and steady, go for it!
  • karo224
    karo224 Posts: 292
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    i have been talking to someone for the past 4 months that i met online and we are meeting in about a week. we talk and share way more than anyone i have ever met in a bar....we will see how it goes but i think that you have to be very careful and comfortable before you make the big decisions. i wish you the best in your relationship.
  • SetecAstronomy
    SetecAstronomy Posts: 470 Member
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    I know this is becoming a new trend now & there are some online couples who do ended up in each other's arms. I have a current online relationship with someone from Spain that I met & chatted for more than 2 years. Although he seems very serious (he already has plans of settling down with me) & sincere with me but sometimes I get worred that this will not work out later on since he is in Spain & I currently living in an Asian country. Just want to know what are your opinions on this kind of relationship?
    Serious and Sincere in an online capacity is one thing...in person is another thing entirely different. I'll agree with everyone else so far who has said that one of you will need to uproot, and I don't know if it's such a good idea until you've spent time together in person before making that decision.
  • Artemis_Acorn
    Artemis_Acorn Posts: 836 Member
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    I've known people who met online and are currently happily in relationships or even married. I also know a couple of people who were deceived by the person they met online. In one case, they married and then divorced with horrific tales of abuse and fraud on the part of the man. She thought he was a prince when they were talking online but he was in reality, a toad.

    Be very careful - the nature of the internet does allow a person to portray themselves as something other than what they truly are.
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
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    I know my situation is different because I live in the states and the boyfriend I'm with now also lives here in the states but we met online years ago, and finally met in person in 2009. we've been together ever since and he moved here to Colorado (He lived in North Carolina before), so I do believe things can work out! What you should figure out before hand is which of you would be willing to move to the other place because it will essentially come down to that! But I'm happy for you! I do believe online relationships can work, since I'm proof it has worked for me! I love my boyfriend very much and he had no problem moving here for me once we met in person. He has a job here now and he LOVES it here. =) I'm just glad things worked out in the end. I would have moved to NC for him too, but he likes it here better so it all worked out! I wish you the best!!! Good luck! =)

    He already planning to go here visit me soon & then we will settle down in his country. Frankly I also love to live there & get to know my grandmother's ancestral roots although my bf lives in the northern part while our ancestral place is in the southern part. I hope that things will work out for us just like what you two have. I'm so happy that you have a successful relationship & I wish you all the best. :smile:
  • illy823
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    I totally agree... I met my last boyfriend on "match.com"... and people look great on paper and in reality, it's a whole other story... Everything that he "said" he was, he was for the first month.... After that, it was all lies... I'm not saying that you can't meet anyone and get married or have a great relationship... (you've seen the commercials)... hmmm everyone on there meets at a restaurant... over here everyone meets at Starbucks... lmao... Either way, please be careful... Make sure that you know whom you are seriously speaking too...

    You should also wonder are the coming into your relationship "with a carry-on" or a whole bunch of luggage???? Be careful, follow your gutt feelings... and have faith....

    illy
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
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    I've known people who met online and are currently happily in relationships or even married. I also know a couple of people who were deceived by the person they met online. In one case, they married and then divorced with horrific tales of abuse and fraud on the part of the man. She thought he was a prince when they were talking online but he was in reality, a toad.

    Be very careful - the nature of the internet does allow a person to portray themselves as something other than what they truly are.

    I also heard that from some people here & which is why I get worried. Although I completely agree with his plan to go visit me here & also to meet my parents (this is a trend here), but still I can't help but feel kinda cautious not because I don't trust him but because I still haven't met him yet.
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
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    I totally agree... I met my last boyfriend on "match.com"... and people look great on paper and in reality, it's a whole other story... Everything that he "said" he was, he was for the first month.... After that, it was all lies... I'm not saying that you can't meet anyone and get married or have a great relationship... (you've seen the commercials)... hmmm everyone on there meets at a restaurant... over here everyone meets at Starbucks... lmao... Either way, please be careful... Make sure that you know whom you are seriously speaking too...

    You should also wonder are the coming into your relationship "with a carry-on" or a whole bunch of luggage???? Be careful, follow your gutt feelings... and have faith....

    illy

    OK I will :smile: & I also agree on that in either way whether online or in person, we have to be very careful and more so when the person is miles away. We'll see what will happen to us although I don't really give in my 100% because of it.
  • Bethywethy93
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    I technically met my fiance online.
    We knew each other from school, but later started talking online.
    he came back to visit me for a few weeks during the summer, then went back to a different state and we were long distance for three years. He came back again this summer and now we're engaged!

    If you have feelings for someone then you can make the relatoinship work,
    and i think online is a good way to meet people, just as long as you know a little bit about the person.
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
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    i have been talking to someone for the past 4 months that i met online and we are meeting in about a week. we talk and share way more than anyone i have ever met in a bar....we will see how it goes but i think that you have to be very careful and comfortable before you make the big decisions. i wish you the best in your relationship.

    Thanks :smile:
  • SuperMoniMonk
    SuperMoniMonk Posts: 467 Member
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    eventually one of you will have to move , but who is willing to take that step? You or him?
    I had an online relationship back in 1991 , after a year of communication I decided to come to the U.S and meet him in person.
    The relationship went well for the first two years but then it ended terribly.
    If you are willing to move to Spain just to be with him , both of you need to be sincere and mature about the whole situacion.
    It's a big step, leaving family behind,friends,job.pets..etc... is not easy.


    It's your life .the move is a risk ..I love them. I'm a gambleler at times...but now that im a older and wiser just make sure the parachute actually works:laugh:
    Don't be afraid to ask him just how serious he is about your relationship, there were things I never asked just because I didn't want to seem paranoid or didn't want scare him away. I wish I had put the cards on the table and had a real talk. I was young and naive then and Just let my emotions lead me to him. You are worthy so make sure you look out for you,,if he truly cares for you he won't get upset ..he will understand .. Good luck !:flowerforyou:
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
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    I met my husband online in 1999. Yay for random AIM chats! (Does anybody even use AIM anymore? :laugh:) I agree with the person who said they can be as unpredictable as any other relationship. The biggest downside is not getting to spend any time together in person. Yes, any person can be a liar, in-person or online, but I think it's easier to hide stuff from behind a computer screen. That said, I'm all about throwing caution to the wind for love. Keep your heart guarded only as much as you realize that this relationship could fail just like any other relationship could fail, and have the confidence in yourself that you can be self-sufficient -- don't pin your everything on one person, whether online or down the street. And don't use up all your life savings uprooting your life unless you're sure you can come back home if need be, or make a life for yourself there if the relationship goes south. But if you have real feelings for him, and you feel like the relationship is strong and steady, go for it!

    Thanks... Good thing I have my own finances to back me up that I don't want to tell anybody about it. I know this sound weird but I also encounter a lot of guys (especially here where I am but it can also apply anywhere) who I felt just used me for money & made me feel more like an ATM machine.
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
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    eventually one of you will have to move , but who is willing to take that step? You or him?
    I had an online relationship back in 1991 , after a year of communication I decided to come to the U.S and meet him in person.
    The relationship went well for the first two years but then it ended terribly.
    If you are willing to move to Spain just to be with him , both of you need to be sincere and mature about the whole situacion.
    It's a big step, leaving family behind,friends,job.pets..etc... is not easy.


    It's your life .the move is a risk ..I love them. I'm a gambleler at times...but now that im a older and wiser just make sure the parachute actually works:laugh:
    Don't be afraid to ask him just how serious he is about your relationship, there were things I never asked just because I didn't want to seem paranoid or didn't want scare him away. I wish I had put the cards on the table and had a real talk. I was young and naive then and Just let my emotions lead me to him. You are worthy so make sure you look out for you,,if he truly cares for you he won't get upset ..he will understand .. Good luck !:flowerforyou:

    Oh OK. I hope everything is fine now there. Anyway I'm also asking him on those things and he keeps on saying to me that he loves me & he's willing to do everything for me :ohwell: just I promise I won't cheat on him but well I'm still feel unsure about this. Thanks for your advice & I wish you all the best. :smile:
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
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    I'm sure it could work, but eventually one of you would have to uproot unless you are both content with never meeting face to face.

    That's what I'm thinking. We both wanted to meet face to face because things are very different in person than in internet but since we still haven't meet yet so I couldn't stop worrying.
  • SuperMoniMonk
    SuperMoniMonk Posts: 467 Member
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    Oh OK. I hope everything is fine now there. Anyway I'm also asking him on those things and he keeps on saying to me that he loves me & he's willing to do everything for me :ohwell: just I promise I won't cheat on him but well I'm still feel unsure about this. Thanks for your advice & I wish you all the best. :smile:
    [/quote]


    Things are great =D ..that was a lesson for me , but if your bf plans to go visit you and talk to your parents ..that would a good start.
    If I could go back I would have made him come meet mine first ...lol