Emotional Eating or stress eating
Replies
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nazah_sakin wrote: »So the question is are you excluding food because it doesn't fit your idea of a "diet" or are you excluding foods that you cannot moderate well or would trigger a binge?
@NovusDies thank you for your comment. I don't have any fixed idea that a diet menu should look like this. The problem is that if I start responding to such cravings I might lose my focus. I believe that I can have anything in moderation. But what I was feeling last night was more like a rebel. As you said my inner child - you are right it's a rebel child! I never really had much likings for fried chicken. My mind is just playing tricks I believe. If I respond to it, I eat a chicken today. Tomorrow I would want a cake. I will start with one piece and end up eating 3-4 slices or more. I don't know.
I know I can eat anything in moderation. It can be a piece of chocolate or a cake or a slice of pizza as long as I am not going over my calorie goals and also burning some calories I am fine.
Also I am more into the process of healthy eating and leading an active life. I feel good when I eat clean food. I feel good when I eat home cooked nutritious meal.
What's wrong with having a piece of fried chicken? There is nothing wrong with it. I might have a piece next week but because I made that choice not because my mind/my emotions played some foolish trick to gain control over me. I don't know if I am making any sense. I am trying to be aware of the choices I make. Thank you for your reply. Congratulations on your weight loss. You are an inspiration. 😊😊
Good response.
If you have 75 or more pounds to lose you might want to come to my 'Larger Losers' group. We have a recent discussion going about cravings. Here is the link:
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/133315-larger-losers
If not, or you are not interested there is a mental exercise you can try:
Imagine you are a bus driver. The cravings are obnoxious kids making noise in the back. Your job is to stay on the road despite the distraction and never allow the kids to see you sweat. Be defiant. See them as the unhelpful brats they are. When the kids learn that you will not give them attention they will hopefully settle down and allow you to compromise with them.
Different people need different tools so that may or may not work. It is the type of thing that works for me.
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nazah_sakin wrote: »So the question is are you excluding food because it doesn't fit your idea of a "diet" or are you excluding foods that you cannot moderate well or would trigger a binge?
@NovusDies thank you for your comment. I don't have any fixed idea that a diet menu should look like this. The problem is that if I start responding to such cravings I might lose my focus. I believe that I can have anything in moderation. But what I was feeling last night was more like a rebel. As you said my inner child - you are right it's a rebel child! I never really had much likings for fried chicken. My mind is just playing tricks I believe. If I respond to it, I eat a chicken today. Tomorrow I would want a cake. I will start with one piece and end up eating 3-4 slices or more. I don't know.
I know I can eat anything in moderation. It can be a piece of chocolate or a cake or a slice of pizza as long as I am not going over my calorie goals and also burning some calories I am fine.
Also I am more into the process of healthy eating and leading an active life. I feel good when I eat clean food. I feel good when I eat home cooked nutritious meal.
What's wrong with having a piece of fried chicken? There is nothing wrong with it. I might have a piece next week but because I made that choice not because my mind/my emotions played some foolish trick to gain control over me. I don't know if I am making any sense. I am trying to be aware of the choices I make. Thank you for your reply. Congratulations on your weight loss. You are an inspiration. 😊😊
Don’t beat yourself up so much. If you have been an emotional eater for a while it’s a hard thing to crack. The learning experience from each binge or craving or eating episode is to reflect on it, try and think about what led you to feel that way, and think about what you would do differently next time you feel that way. Sometimes it’s just about wanting that particular food because you want it and that’s ok.
For example what were you feeling when you though about eating fried chicken? We’re you sad, or anxious or stressed? If so what was making you feel that way? Could you do something else next time you feel that way which is a healthier way of coping with the feeling?
Recovery from emotional eating does take time and effort and focus. But I promise you it’s so much better on the other side once you get there!1 -
nazah_sakin wrote: »Totally agree with what you said. I feel like I deserve to do what makes me happy which is binge eating loads of crap.. But later I feel even worse for gaining all that weight I had lost before.
Why *does* binge eating make us happy??? I'm exactly the same way.
I live to eat instead of the opposite. I wake up thinking about food and go to sleep thinking about food. It has become an obsession now. I rely on it to calm my nerves, fill a void, substitute for (fill in the blank here) anything and everything else that I'm missing in my life. Last year I had solid important goals, got down to low BMI(130# for me), exercised every day, counted calories, the whole 9 yards. Then the holidays came, I slipped a bit but climbed back on(and off) until Covid became a huge thing. Stress increased. Then my sister's dh sadly went from 1 stage of his Alzheimers to the next and I have since become a caretaker and respite provider for them. They're constantly on my mind now and my stress and worry level is through the roof.
I handle it with food. Not healthy food, but anything junky that I can get my hands on. I am now up into the 150's with no signs of stopping. No mind control that I had all of last year. No self-esteem. No will to do this.
Just sharing my story and feelings to let you know you're not alone in your struggles. I like all the ideas coming forth but the first thing you need(and ME TOO) is to get your mind committed to the journey that will help control your relationship with food. I felt so strong logging everything on to MFP. It did help. Until it didn't.
Good luck and hope you can find the power within yourself to change, if this isn't who you want to be. We all have some sort of an escape, something that soothes us and eases our souls. I wish exercise was mine but I'm much too lazy for that. Mine seem to be carbs, sugar, crap food. 
One suggestion is to check out the volume eater's thread.
Just wanted to say I'm sorry it's such a struggle right now. I truly hope it gets better for you soon.
One foot in front of the other. You will get there.1 -
Honestly, nazah_sakin, the way you are engaging with the struggle is exactly the right thing to do. It is a struggle. The way you are observing yourself and your feelings, the questions you are asking yourself... you are exactly on track. Your description of rebelling against reason does indeed make sense. I recognize it in myself when urges strike. Keep observing and probing, and the insights that come to you will, little by little, give you more power over the vagaries of urges. Don't give up. Stay with the struggle. Good post.
ETA: Love the bus driver analogy, NovusDies!2 -
I am a bit late here, but I have a similar issue. Especially when I am working, if I am stressed about something I want to use food to feel better.
Drinking tea helps me a bit. I try to use it as much as possible, trying different kinds, noticing how they test different and warm me up from inside when I don't feel good.
Also, I feel like it is useful to notice it when it happens, to take a moment to consciously think about it and what triggered it ("ok I am stressed / sad because this happens, I have the urge to feel better..."), and then decide what to do/delay it ("I will eat this if I still think it is necessary in 10 minutes").1 -
New here, but the title totally caught my eye! I HAVE A HUGE issue with this. It's been a very stressful week (mom in the hospital after one year to the day we've had major medical things happening and I turned into a caretaker for her) and as I was sitting there waiting for her to be admitted I couldn't stop thinking about ALL the junk food I wanted to go home and eat. It was so eye opening! I went for a 4 mile bike ride instead. Tonight I went for 6 miles. Not normal for me but Feeling so accomplished! I also have about 80 lbs to lose.5
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nazah_sakin wrote: »So the question is are you excluding food because it doesn't fit your idea of a "diet" or are you excluding foods that you cannot moderate well or would trigger a binge?
@NovusDies thank you for your comment. I don't have any fixed idea that a diet menu should look like this. The problem is that if I start responding to such cravings I might lose my focus. I believe that I can have anything in moderation. But what I was feeling last night was more like a rebel. As you said my inner child - you are right it's a rebel child! I never really had much likings for fried chicken. My mind is just playing tricks I believe. If I respond to it, I eat a chicken today. Tomorrow I would want a cake. I will start with one piece and end up eating 3-4 slices or more. I don't know.
I know I can eat anything in moderation. It can be a piece of chocolate or a cake or a slice of pizza as long as I am not going over my calorie goals and also burning some calories I am fine.
Also I am more into the process of healthy eating and leading an active life. I feel good when I eat clean food. I feel good when I eat home cooked nutritious meal.
What's wrong with having a piece of fried chicken? There is nothing wrong with it. I might have a piece next week but because I made that choice not because my mind/my emotions played some foolish trick to gain control over me. I don't know if I am making any sense. I am trying to be aware of the choices I make. Thank you for your reply. Congratulations on your weight loss. You are an inspiration. 😊😊
Good response.
If you have 75 or more pounds to lose you might want to come to my 'Larger Losers' group. We have a recent discussion going about cravings. Here is the link:
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/133315-larger-losers
If not, or you are not interested there is a mental exercise you can try:
Imagine you are a bus driver. The cravings are obnoxious kids making noise in the back. Your job is to stay on the road despite the distraction and never allow the kids to see you sweat. Be defiant. See them as the unhelpful brats they are. When the kids learn that you will not give them attention they will hopefully settle down and allow you to compromise with them.
Different people need different tools so that may or may not work. It is the type of thing that works for me.
Of course. I would love to join your group. Thank you again for your support. I felt a lot relieved when I shared what I was feeling. I am feeling a lot better today. 😊😊😊1 -
kelly_c_77 wrote: »nazah_sakin wrote: »Totally agree with what you said. I feel like I deserve to do what makes me happy which is binge eating loads of crap.. But later I feel even worse for gaining all that weight I had lost before.
Why *does* binge eating make us happy??? I'm exactly the same way. I live to eat instead of the opposite. I wake up thinking about food and go to sleep thinking about food. It has become an obsession now. I rely on it to calm my nerves, fill a void, substitute for (fill in the blank here) anything and everything else that I'm missing in my life. Last year I had solid important goals, got down to low BMI(130# for me), exercised every day, counted calories, the whole 9 yards. Then the holidays came, I slipped a bit but climbed back on(and off) until Covid became a huge thing. Stress increased. Then my sister's dh sadly went from 1 stage of his Alzheimers to the next and I have since become a caretaker and respite provider for them. They're constantly on my mind now and my stress and worry level is through the roof.
I handle it with food. Not healthy food, but anything junky that I can get my hands on. I am now up into the 150's with no signs of stopping. No mind control that I had all of last year. No self-esteem. No will to do this.
Just sharing my story and feelings to let you know you're not alone in your struggles. I like all the ideas coming forth but the first thing you need(and ME TOO) is to get your mind committed to the journey that will help control your relationship with food. I felt so strong logging everything on to MFP. It did help. Until it didn't.
Good luck and hope you can find the power within yourself to change, if this isn't who you want to be. We all have some sort of an escape, something that soothes us and eases our souls. I wish exercise was mine but I'm much too lazy for that. Mine seem to be carbs, sugar, crap food.
One suggestion is to check out the volume eater's thread.
Just wanted to say I'm sorry it's such a struggle right now. I truly hope it gets better for you soon.
One foot in front of the other. You will get there.
Thank you so much. I am feeling lot better now. 😊😊😊0 -
Honestly, nazah_sakin, the way you are engaging with the struggle is exactly the right thing to do. It is a struggle. The way you are observing yourself and your feelings, the questions you are asking yourself... you are exactly on track. Your description of rebelling against reason does indeed make sense. I recognize it in myself when urges strike. Keep observing and probing, and the insights that come to you will, little by little, give you more power over the vagaries of urges. Don't give up. Stay with the struggle. Good post.
ETA: Love the bus driver analogy, NovusDies!
Thank you dear.. Hope we all stay strong on this journey and live a healthy life. 😊😊😊0 -
akkelley81 wrote: »New here, but the title totally caught my eye! I HAVE A HUGE issue with this. It's been a very stressful week (mom in the hospital after one year to the day we've had major medical things happening and I turned into a caretaker for her) and as I was sitting there waiting for her to be admitted I couldn't stop thinking about ALL the junk food I wanted to go home and eat. It was so eye opening! I went for a 4 mile bike ride instead. Tonight I went for 6 miles. Not normal for me but Feeling so accomplished! I also have about 80 lbs to lose.
I am so sorry. You are going through a lot. Hope your mom feels better soon. And yes burning calories motivate to stay on track. 😊😊1 -
nazah_sakin wrote: »So the question is are you excluding food because it doesn't fit your idea of a "diet" or are you excluding foods that you cannot moderate well or would trigger a binge?
@NovusDies thank you for your comment. I don't have any fixed idea that a diet menu should look like this. The problem is that if I start responding to such cravings I might lose my focus. I believe that I can have anything in moderation. But what I was feeling last night was more like a rebel. As you said my inner child - you are right it's a rebel child! I never really had much likings for fried chicken. My mind is just playing tricks I believe. If I respond to it, I eat a chicken today. Tomorrow I would want a cake. I will start with one piece and end up eating 3-4 slices or more. I don't know.
I know I can eat anything in moderation. It can be a piece of chocolate or a cake or a slice of pizza as long as I am not going over my calorie goals and also burning some calories I am fine.
Also I am more into the process of healthy eating and leading an active life. I feel good when I eat clean food. I feel good when I eat home cooked nutritious meal.
What's wrong with having a piece of fried chicken? There is nothing wrong with it. I might have a piece next week but because I made that choice not because my mind/my emotions played some foolish trick to gain control over me. I don't know if I am making any sense. I am trying to be aware of the choices I make. Thank you for your reply. Congratulations on your weight loss. You are an inspiration. 😊😊
Don’t beat yourself up so much. If you have been an emotional eater for a while it’s a hard thing to crack. The learning experience from each binge or craving or eating episode is to reflect on it, try and think about what led you to feel that way, and think about what you would do differently next time you feel that way. Sometimes it’s just about wanting that particular food because you want it and that’s ok.
For example what were you feeling when you though about eating fried chicken? We’re you sad, or anxious or stressed? If so what was making you feel that way? Could you do something else next time you feel that way which is a healthier way of coping with the feeling?
Recovery from emotional eating does take time and effort and focus. But I promise you it’s so much better on the other side once you get there!
Thank you 😊😊 of course it is. Patience is the key! 🙏0 -
New to the boards, and following this discussion. I am completely an emotional eater. My mom was, too. And I love food! When I was younger, I was super-active so I didn't realize how out-of-control my eating was. But more recently, between several major life changes, and working desk jobs, it has all caught up with me.1
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@saltysparkle Hello! To deal with emotional eating what I am doing is introspection - trying to understand my emotions and my reaction and response to them. These days I am focusing on communication with people who have similar problems and been trying to overcome this. I am focusing on my daily activities such meal prepp, work, exercise or being active etc. My anxieties and insecurities try to sneak back in and overwhelm my mind.. Whenever that happens I do a breathing exercise.. I keep doing it until my mind is diverted. I used to practice mindfulness which helped me focus on present. I keep reminding myself I am fine right now. Nothings happening. It is alright. That's how I try keep my mind calm. I do write a lot here in different forums and sharing my thoughts or worries or struggles been really helpful.4
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I am feeling down since I woke up. I went to bed before midnight. Fell asleep at around 1 am but couldn't sleep through the night. I am awake since 4 am.
There are always something or the other to overwhelm my mind. And it is called life. Work related problem or family crisis this or that. I feel like disappearing at times but it's not an option. Hence face them, fight them, deal with them.
Sometimes I do not have the energy to fight back. Sometimes I do not see an end to it at all.
On top of all these, I have health issues. I am just rambling. I needed to let it out.5 -
nazah_sakin wrote: »I am feeling down since I woke up. I went to bed before midnight. Fell asleep at around 1 am but couldn't sleep through the night. I am awake since 4 am.
There are always something or the other to overwhelm my mind. And it is called life. Work related problem or family crisis this or that. I feel like disappearing at times but it's not an option. Hence face them, fight them, deal with them.
Sometimes I do not have the energy to fight back. Sometimes I do not see an end to it at all.
On top of all these, I have health issues. I am just rambling. I needed to let it out.
Yeh, last night was an up/down night for me as well. I wish there was a way to quiet our minds better during the night. Do you meditate? Deep breathe? Yoga? I wonder if any of those would be helpful? Or if you simply didn't fight insomnia and got up to read or journal? What about CBD gummies; my sister has terrible insomnia and says they do help. She uses those and Melatonin.
Hopefully you can have an easy day and get rest. Good luck!1 -
I suffered the same problem, and the way i found to resolved was changing the anxiety response to something else. I prepared myself to identify /recognise when my anxiety was starting to kick in, so i prepared a plan of going for a walk or doing any easy exercise that I could do immediately after i started having those feelings. at first you wont succeed on all attempts to avoid the food feast triggered by anxiety, but if you keep yourself firm and repeat to yourself "that is just anxiety its not me, I can choose to do something else" and then do it; you will see over short period of time the progress and less and less food being consumed till you reach the point you simply say to yourself "I am not eating that, i choose to go for a walk" and it works every time.1
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