We broke up because...
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Didn't believe that I had ice cream headaches everytime he wanted to get frisky 🤷0
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Tried to make me eat ice cream 🤢0
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she ate all the Tim Tams
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She dated all the Tims, Tams, Toms, and Todds.2
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Wouldn't let me play with his rocks. He said they were just for his hands only.1
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She was always getting her rocks off at some guys house2
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She kept stalking my ex0
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He still loved his ex 0
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I accidentally called her by my ex’s name in bed.......0
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She was betrothed to another0
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He thought I worked in a Brothel 😳🤷0
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She was the worst brothel employee I ever had. She completely refused to work. 😤0
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I put my love in her coffee. She rejected it, preferred starbucks.0
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he put "stuff" in my coffee 😱0
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She had too much stuff in her closet, really I saw the human bones in there.0
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He wouldn’t let me sell him to Jo for her “research.”0
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Smh.. she actually asked the vic.. erm research subjects if they wanted to participate.. and let them go if they didn't. 0
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I released some of her Basement "Guests"
But only the unruly ones! 🤷1 -
She brought all the unruly “guests” to my basement. They’re so loud. 😒0
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She never allowed parties or good times in the house 🥴0
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Reading goodnight moon before bed every night got old quick0
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Wouldnt watch Horror movies before bed!0
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Because she doesn't like fishing0
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Because he sold my kayak0
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Really because I sold her protein bars0
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You ATE the protein bars! No profit when they're in your belly!0
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"F'N" was in every other sentence and If I called him on his cursing he'd say that FN was his middle name!0
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Profits to my muscles lol
Or because I didn't spot you correctly0 -
Was off watching the Skinny girl TRY to lift a 5lb barbell0
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