You don't look like you need to lose weight. Huh?

fitplease
fitplease Posts: 647 Member
edited October 2 in Motivation and Support
"You don't look like you need to lose weight."

I heard this compliment again tonight. However, my muffin top is still very obvious. I don't doubt their sincerity, but I do doubt their eyesight. :-)

Has anyone had a similar experience? What has been your reaction?
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Replies

  • laurasnyder411
    laurasnyder411 Posts: 172 Member
    I have been telling them that it's my body and I know what weight I need to be healthy and comfortable. Thank you for your concern.
  • Jelleebean
    Jelleebean Posts: 212
    it's all in how you carry yourself...

    and i'd be realllllly happy with a muffin top... i'm trying to get rid of the whole damn bakery :drinker:
  • rileysowner
    rileysowner Posts: 8,330 Member
    I have been hearing that since I went from obese to overweight based on BMI. I think the problem is most people today have little idea what a healthy weight looks like. I know I am not there and probably won't be until I am lower than the goal I set originally.
  • catwrangler
    catwrangler Posts: 918 Member
    it's all in how you carry yourself...

    and i'd be realllllly happy with a muffin top... i'm trying to get rid of the whole damn bakery :drinker:
    word

    Muffin tops are easily hidden.......beachball bellies, not so much.
  • chelsifina
    chelsifina Posts: 346 Member
    Meh - I'm doing this to meet my own standards of beauty and health and I don't expect that others share them. I have friends who, I'm sure, imagine I should be more ambitious and those that think I should be less. Whatever. In that situation I thank people for their compliment (as was their intention I presume) and continue on.
  • McKayMachina
    McKayMachina Posts: 2,670 Member
    Everyone has a different view of what looks good. I had people tell me that, and mean it, when I was 100 lbs. overweight. :/ Now I'm beginning to hear it a lot with at LEAST 40 left to go. People all have different perceptions.
  • Zeromilediet
    Zeromilediet Posts: 787 Member
    Yes ... been there heard that. However I have a different view of what my body should look like and it doesn't include a muffin top. Thanks for the compliment :-)

    The whole damn bakery .... hahaha!
  • pegglesw
    pegglesw Posts: 11
    I get told that all the time...............I find I explain to them that I am within
    norms of weight for my age and height, Its my body fat % is off the charts.
  • MB_Positif
    MB_Positif Posts: 8,897 Member
    I just had my mom who is 50 pounds lighter than me (only one inch shorter) say she didn't think I needed to lose much more. I appreciate that she thinks I look a lot better than I did, but why would she tell me that? It's like, ok honey, that's great that you've gotten sorta healthy, you should definitely stop now...
  • Ireshgurl
    Ireshgurl Posts: 559
    I got that same response today at work with my coworker. I just started working there on Wednesday and we were talkin bout motivation and weight loss and i was like i need to lose 25lbs and she answered back with "from where?!" I know how to dress my body as to not show my "problem areas" because i absolutely hate them, but this muffin top i carry doesn't go away when i take my clothes off, lmao. I think i'm just gonna keep my mouth shut from now on because people don't see me the way i see myself.
  • sarah307
    sarah307 Posts: 1,363 Member
    it's all in how you carry yourself...

    and i'd be realllllly happy with a muffin top... i'm trying to get rid of the whole damn bakery :drinker:

    :) ^^ haha!!

    I would just say you'd like to tone up and keep on being healthy!
  • katemanning3
    katemanning3 Posts: 42 Member
    I tell my brother this. He recently lost 200 lbs and he said that when he looks in the mirror, he still sees a fat guy. That kind of thinking leads to eating disorders and taking size way too far. He is already the lowest he has been since junior high. He is 6'1 220. He is healthy and looks good. Sure he isn't all toned but that is different than weight loss. He hasn't stepped foot in a gym the entire time he has been losing. He is on medifast and isn't allowed to workout. When he transitions out and finally goes back to the gym he will look amazing. He is under the impression that he needs to keep losing and stay on medifast. No matter how much more weight he loses, it isn't going to tone him.

    So when people say, "you dont look like you need to lose weight." its because you look good and healthy and losing weight isn't going to change you body any. Working out and toning is what you really want, not to keep dropping weight and most people dont look at someone and think, they need a supermodel body. If you are in a decent porportion to the rest of your body, you are healthy, then you are fine at your weight. Most people are probably dying to just be your size.
  • AmyW125
    AmyW125 Posts: 303 Member
    I still have 23 pounds to go...and people keep telling me I'll be to skinny. I just say thanks and keep going. I know where I want to be and what it's going to take to get there. People are being nice but I know the truth...LOL
  • tarcia
    tarcia Posts: 6 Member
    Problem is that most folks wear there clothes too tight and you can see every dimple! Most people tell me that I don't look like I weight 170. But agaain I wear clothes that fit and not cut off my circulation.
  • Sallyismyname
    Sallyismyname Posts: 43 Member
    LOL on the Bakery comment :) That's awesome :) I get the whole "you don't need to lose weight" comment all of the time. I am flattered when I hear this... then I remember... I see myself in the shower. I see my gut when I sit down in the car and go to buckle up. I feel my lower half jiggle when I run. mmm hmmm. So... With clothes, standing still, spanks on, and sucking in, yeah I look great. Unfortunately, I can't shower with my spanks. And I have to live with MYSELF for the rest of my life. So, while it's flattering, it's your body. If you want to lose some pounds and tone up, you are the one who makes that decision. And then people won't say you look good or fine, they will say great or amazing :) And you will believe it :)
  • whatwentwrong
    whatwentwrong Posts: 228
    if asked, i would say that i don't think most of the people on here need to lose weight, but i know it can be demotivating so i keep it to myself :P
  • ThePhoenixRose
    ThePhoenixRose Posts: 1,978 Member
    I've heard that too, or people don't believe how much I weigh. Well, I'm not going to lie and say I weigh MORE!! That's just craziness! Because I'm 6ft., they just don't see it. Plus, I've found that a lot of tall people are heavy, so in comparison, I might not look "big." I'm not going for a pound goal so much as a size/health goal. I'm focusing more on measurements at this point!
  • babygurl48
    babygurl48 Posts: 1,237 Member
    it's all in how you carry yourself...

    and i'd be realllllly happy with a muffin top... i'm trying to get rid of the whole damn bakery :drinker:
    awww....lol... u too funny!! hang in there.. u will get there!!!:smile:
  • chridow
    chridow Posts: 178
    i've heard this a lot, esp when i tell ppl how much i want to lose. back in feb 11 i was 5' 3" and 200lbs i FELT like a whale, but nobody seemed to think my goal of losing 50lbs was "necessary." now im down to about 180 and ppl still look at me like o.O when i say i have 40 more i'd like to lose. it really is all about how you feel about your body and how healthy you actually are. from my real friends i know they only want to make sure i don't get too skinny. from others i just take it with a grain of salt.
  • capriciousmoon
    capriciousmoon Posts: 1,263 Member
    I think it may be because it's normal for people to be at the high end of their weight range or at the least, slightly over weight. If you look healthy to someone they'll probably think that wanting to lose weight is vanity. If someone were to look at me now I doubt that'd know that gaining less than a pound would have me in the overweight category for my height.

    Even crazier than having someone say that I don't need to lose weight... I had someone tell me that I don't look like I need to exercise! No matter what size you are you should have some activity in your life just to stay healthy.
  • fitplease
    fitplease Posts: 647 Member
    So when people say, "you dont look like you need to lose weight." its because you look good and healthy and losing weight isn't going to change you body any. Working out and toning is what you really want, not to keep dropping weight and most people dont look at someone and think, they need a supermodel body. If you are in a decent porportion to the rest of your body, you are healthy, then you are fine at your weight. Most people are probably dying to just be your size.

    I am actually overweight by the charts, and according to my doctor. But, I agree, sometimes, it is the toning we need. I'll love it when I get there. :-)
  • BBCTiffyB
    BBCTiffyB Posts: 114 Member
    I get told that all the time...............I find I explain to them that I am within
    norms of weight for my age and height, Its my body fat % is off the charts.

    That's my biggest problem. In my case, they would be right! I don't need to 'lose any more weight" however I do need to drop a few % in the body fat region. People who don't understand that "weight" and "fat" are really two very different things, they just don't understand.

    I know they really mean it when they think that, but it is just that, they don't really understand. I'm sure you do look great, but we are our own worst critics, but we also know our bodies the best! Congrats on the weight loss and good luck on the weight loss still to come :)
  • Awkward30
    Awkward30 Posts: 1,927 Member
    I think it may be because it's normal for people to be at the high end of their weight range or at the least, slightly over weight. If you look healthy to someone they'll probably think that wanting to lose weight is vanity. If someone were to look at me now I doubt that'd know that gaining less than a pound would have me in the overweight category for my height.

    Even crazier than having someone say that I don't need to lose weight... I had someone tell me that I don't look like I need to exercise! No matter what size you are you should have some activity in your life just to stay healthy.

    I got that the other day "were you just running?" "no, I just have a sweating problem... Just kidding, yeah" "you should know you really don't need to run!" umm... I value my heart, so I actually do!

    I have large boobs, and tend to carry my weight decently, so people kept thinking I didn't have much to lose... Even people who have seen me naked, which leads me to believe our society really has decided it is okay to be overweight. I was a rounding error away from obesity when I first started...
  • jazzy020106
    jazzy020106 Posts: 485 Member
    All the time!! Lol.. Well actually I get people who argue saying I don't weigh what I said I do.. That I weight MUCH less! Like WHY would I lie about my weight and say a LARGER number??
  • nrvo
    nrvo Posts: 473 Member
    I just say thanks, and tell them that I'm trying to just eat healthier.
  • eidalac
    eidalac Posts: 11 Member
    I get that alot, but then I tell people what I weigh ... and then I have to get on a scale to prove it. I simply don't look as overweight as I am. Granted, I'm not that overweight, but more than anyone would think to look at me.

    Then again, I also sink like a stone in water, so it's not so much of a body fat % with me. Which reminds me I need to figure that out again.
  • claire_xox
    claire_xox Posts: 282 Member
    I tell people they don't need to lose weight when I think they should...The Healthy BMI range is HUGE and you can be in it and have a bit of flab. But if anyone starts talking about a diet and when they are probably in the healthy range but the higher end of course I say you don't need to lose weight!! and from a medical point they probably don't, but socially they probably are overweight... and of course it's not just physical that matters, mental does to.

    If you talk about a diet, no one in the world would turn around and say "That's a good idea, I was going to suggesst it for you".
  • AimingHighWeighingLow
    AimingHighWeighingLow Posts: 192 Member
    I go with one of the following:

    'the scale tells me different'
    'my jeans beg to differ as I can't do them up'
    'are you blind'
    'I look different without clothes on...wanna see....then they change their minds!'


    Then I log them in my head as known liars who would never tell you what they really think!
  • dad106
    dad106 Posts: 4,868 Member
    I get this all the time because I'm tall and no one understands that my weight just has more places to go.... it doesn't mean that I'm not overweight or heavy.. I am, I just don't look like it.

    I have friends who are shorter, so obvi. their weight shows more.. and when I say how much I've lost, everyone freaks out and acts like I'm trying to kill myself.. when in reality, I'm looking and feeling better then I've felt in 3 yrs.. sorry that they can't support that.
  • fteale
    fteale Posts: 5,310 Member
    I got this all the time before I lost weight. I was borderline overweight (BMI 25-26) and I DID need to lose weight to be optimally healthy.

    Now I have lost weight everyone says "wow! you've lost so much weight, you look great!" Well thanks, but you were telling me before I didn't need to, so which is it?

    I think other people don't like us losing weight as it makes them feel threatened in some way.
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