FC leaving

we will miss you FC

dont let anyone make you feel down, you are fantastic in so many ways :flowerforyou:

Cripes!:noway:
I had no idea this had been going on
Sorry to hear your leaving FC - good luck :flowerforyou:

I have only been a member of this site for 3 weeks but during those 3 weeks FC was a great motivator for me. I have to have a lot of weight to lose and she could relate. I am so sad she left. Cindy

I have to say that I have seen FC dish it back many of times. I dont post on the boards here often. Mostly just lurk alot and read. She knows how to defend herself most certainly. I would say kill em' with kindness. Dont stoop down to that level! Use this site for what it is intended, lose weight, have fun and meet new people!

END THE DRAMA!

That is all! :drinker: :drinker: :drinker: :drinker:

Personally I'm not going to get into blaming anyone. I agree with Losing It Blame games only make things worse. We are all here for a purpose, a healthier lifestyle. Many things go into a healthy lifestyle, eating right, exercise, having support, and also having fun to help us escape stress in our life. (stress can definately effect your healthy lifestyle) It's amazing what a good laugh can do :drinker:
I know there are people here whom I click with more than others. Not to say that I have any issues with anyone here, but that's just life. Not everyone likes everyone and not everyone gets along. We are all different and unique, making us all special in our own ways. But we can all respect others as human beings and be kind. I have had disagreements with some. That doesn't mean I don't respect them for who they are and agree to disagree. If someone doesn't like me or ridicules me, I block their PM's and I stay away from their posts. It's not worth me losing sight of my real goal of a healthier me. :drinker: There were times I've been in threads and healthily debated with people. Did I get a little irritated? Yes, a little. But I actually enjoy it as long as it doesn't turn personal. But I didn't let it ruin my day or ridicule or put that person down or back them into a corner to insult them. I stated my opinion and came to understand their side and sometimes agreed to disagree. Not everyone gets along with everyone. That's life. I'm sure I have plenty of people here who don't care for me. :glasses: :ohwell: :flowerforyou: But, I am here for me and I am not going to let anyone stand in my way. I just stay away from anything I see that may cause controversy (spelling???:ohwell: ) and go on my merry way :flowerforyou: (except for this time, but only because I feel we all have something to learn from this & I feel very strongly about it) Sometimes we have to learn to just stay out of it. No need to hurt ourselves or let things get to us. There is enough stress in the world as it is. We are not all the same and we can't expect everyone to feel the same about everything. All we can do is respect each other as other human beings and if we don't like something, stay out of it, unless it can be healthily discussed and debated. Let others have their "type" of fun and if you don't enjoy what they are discussing stay out of it and look for a thread that does interest you. Have your "type" of fun with the ones that care the most. We all know who our friends are. :flowerforyou: It doesn't mean anything about being in the "in" crowd. We are adults. It is just about opinions, beliefs, and things that you share with other people that determine who you will and will not click with. No one is better than anyone else and none of us have the right to judge others :flowerforyou: There is no "in" crowd. Just adults here getting healthy, meeting friends, and leaning on each other for support. :flowerforyou:

I will agree with Tami that there were times I thought FC and I were really getting along but then there were times I felt as though, if I didn't agree with her, she would back me into a corner. That may not have been her intent, but that is what I felt. But I never insulted her or put her down. I think her accomplishments are amazing and I have seen some very encouraging posts from her. I have had discussions with her but they never turned out bad in the end. We both came to understandings of where the other was coming from. I feel that she had a lot of self love issues and was too worried about other people and where she fit in. And that saddens me, she has a lot to be proud of. All we can do, is be ourselves and the ones who love us for who we are, are the ones to hang onto. Forget anyone else. Block them and ignore them. Move on. Love yourself. Besides, in the end, "you" are all you have. Don't let anyone hold you back from your goals. But at the same time allow and respect others to be themselves. They are who they are, it is what it is. No need to try to make everyone else feel the way you do. Not everyone is going to agree with your opinions. And sometimes I just felt she was too worried about being accepted. :flowerforyou: And by this thread it's obvious she has a lot of people who care for her :flowerforyou:

FC, I wish you luck in whatever you do and I hope you continue to take care of yourself and I hope you continue down your road to a healthier you.:flowerforyou: Don't let anyone stand in your way. Congrats on your success :flowerforyou:

what kellch said and

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
-Eleanor Roosevelt

Just adults here getting healthy, meeting friends, and leaning on each other for support. :flowerforyou:

That was part of the problem. There were too many people making personal attacks against her, many unseen through private messages.

But I never insulted her or put her down. .........

And sometimes I just felt she was too worried about being accepted. :flowerforyou: ....

I feel that she had a lot of self love issues and was too worried about other people and where she fit in.

While you have lost 40lbs of your 43lbs goal (if I am reading your ticker correctly), you have never experienced what it is like to weigh 200+lbs more than your advisable weight. (Neither have I.) I can only imagine the self esteem issues ANYONE would rightly have dealing with this issue, topped with people hounding you and harassing you about if your weight loss was real and what your real motives were. I think you need to re-evaluate your perspective on not understanding her self esteem issues. I know my body/ self esteem issues are a big deal, and I was only 75+lbs overweight.

She only messaged me once and she seemed like a very nice person. She said that she does have problems with people on here thinking she is not real because she will not post pictures of her *before and after* I told her I think it is because most people would be so proud of that accomplishment that they would post tons of pics (think antijared) and that I think people just expect to see pics. I know on other weight loss boards, if you say you have has a loss everyone immediately asks "can we see pics of before and after"
She was a great inspiration and I could care less if she had pics or not, just seeing that number on her page for "weight lost" was inspiring to me!! As a person who needs to lose 100 pounds or more, I love seeing those big numbers in peoples tickers.
Please don't leave FC!!!

Just adults here getting healthy, meeting friends, and leaning on each other for support. :flowerforyou:

That was part of the problem. There were too many people making personal attacks against her, many unseen through private messages.

But I never insulted her or put her down. .........

And sometimes I just felt she was too worried about being accepted. :flowerforyou: ....

I feel that she had a lot of self love issues and was too worried about other people and where she fit in.

While you have lost 40lbs of your 43lbs goal (if I am reading your ticker correctly), you have never experienced what it is like to weigh 200+lbs more than your advisable weight. (Neither have I.) I can only imagine the self esteem issues ANYONE would rightly have dealing with this issue, topped with people hounding you and harassing you about if your weight loss was real and what your real motives were. I think you need to re-evaluate your perspective on not understanding her self esteem issues. I know my body/ self esteem issues are a big deal, and I was only 75+lbs overweight.

I'm sorry, I feel you're misunderstanding what I'm saying. You are right I've never been 200+ lbs over my weight. And I don't have that issue. I felt very insecure about myself at the point I was at. the 40lbs is what I lost since MFP. I had lost 30 before that. And yes, I was very insecure with myself. I gained the weight while in a mentally abusive relationship. The guy would call me a stupid, ugly, fat, who** every single day. The one that was supposed to love me the most. (of course he wasn't like that until months after I moved in with him), the man who held a shotgun up to my head, the man that accused me of sleeping with anyone I looked in the direction of, the one who shoved me down the stairs and caused me to have a miscarraige. I have had my own issues. We all have our own issues and walk different paths. I did have very low self esteem. I was in a very abusive relationship. Mainly mentally but turned physically right before I left. I did get to the point of wanting to kill myself. I finally got out of it knowing that if I didn't leave, I would end up dead one way or another. After years of working on loving myself, I am stronger for having gone through it. Before I was with him I had self-esteem issues also. I still do, but I also have accepted myself and learned to love myself.
Maybe my wording came out wrong.:flowerforyou: What I am trying to say is we have to learn to love ourselves. And I was more or less trying to put the message out there for her not to worry about those other people. Love herself. Don't worry about being accepted by everyone. I know I am not accepted by everyone. But I am ok with that. It's how life works We are all very different people. I just feel she needs to work on loving herself and know she has a lot to be proud of. I was trying to explain what I learned through experiences of my own, the hard way. I was trying to offer support. Sorry if it came out wrong. And sorry if it's coming out wrong again. No bad intentions here. :flowerforyou: Just trying to offer advice. And I'm busy at work so trying to type in between work I know I lose my thought sometimes and try to pick up where I left off without rereading everything.:flowerforyou:

I'm so sorry to hear that FC is leaving. She will definitely be missed. Maybe someone can convince her to stay and just ignore the ones that are negative to her.

I can understand her not wanting to post her pic. I had/have a lot of self image and self esteem issues too but as I get older I'm getting to the point where I don't care so much what people think of my looks. It's really what's inside that matters and if people don't like me for me then that's their problem. And if they don't like my looks then don't look at me.

Hopefully FC will eventually get to that point too. I wish I had gotten to know her a little better and maybe I could help convince her to stay; not for anyone else but for herself. I hope whatever she decides to do she will not give up or let anything or anyone sabotage her weight loss goals.

Good luck to you FC. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: