Struggling 😕

2

Replies

  • PepeLPew
    PepeLPew Posts: 92 Member
    edited May 2021
    amioc wrote: »
    I have been trying to loose weight now for 3 years. My goal is to go from a uk size 10 to a uk size 8 without having to squeeze into them 😕 so probably need to loose around 12lbs ish maybe a bit less.
    My problem is I don’t stick to anything. I’ll loose like 6lbs and then gain it all back sometimes more. I can’t stick to healthy eating for long. Food is definitely my biggest problem. I joined the gym a year and a half ago and loved it but since COVID hit I haven’t been much at all because of lockdowns. I couldn’t get in to the whole exercise at home. I’m really struggling mentally because I hate to way I look and the past few summers I’ve felt so uncomfortable and I promise myself that next summer I will be at my goal but it never happened 😕. Is there time to get near my goal by June?
    So I’m hoping to get advice and tips as to how anybody started out on there journey? How much did you cut out in the beginning? How do you still manage to maintaining/loosing weight?
    I’d be so grateful to anyone that could help me ☺️. Sorry for such a long post!

    "My problem is I don’t stick to anything."

    Hi, this for me seems to be the biggest problem. Consistency is the key, along with diet. There is no mention of calories in/out.

    I have restarted my journey from years ago. I am in week 3 of exercise and tracking calories. This is what I have done:

    - I do cardio on my stationary bike and started off with 1 class. After 3 days, I added another class. I do it daily, religiously. Exercise isn't just for weight loss, it's for the high I get from exercising. It lasts all day.
    - I stick to my calories from MFP and track daily. Personally I do lose eat back my exercise calories, because according to my Peloton, 55 minutes of cardio with 2 classes means I burn 1000 calories (dubious!) but I will not eat that back. But I have a bit of a cushion if I am hungry. But I always end the day with a deficit.
    - on off days, I go for a walk for 30 minutes, brisk.
    - each week I journal about what I realized the week before, and make course corrections.
    - I cut out bulky carb stuff like pasta.
    - Every time I get a hunger pang I ask myself if I am really hungry or if there is something else (stress, emotional eating, trigger, etc).
    - I try to sleep as much as I can every night. Fail more times, but I still try. Up early, too.
    - I do not see exercise as the means to an end. The benefits that HIIT, etc bring outweighs the long term gains which I am sure exist.

    I would look at why you cannot stick to healthy eating for long, maybe dig deep.

    I am down 4 pounds my first week. I will continue and take things on a week by week basis. At some point I will introduce strength training to mix it up.

    Go walking daily. Pack podcasts and listen to music.

    Get rid of the goal. If you can't be consistent you will fall back on feeling badly about not meeting it and it will sabotage you :(

  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,617 Member
    amioc wrote: »
    Thank you both for the advice ☺️. The weight I’m at now is my starting weight so do you think maybe it will be a bit easier to get closer to my goal? At the moment I’ve not been exercising and am not eating healthy so I’m really hoping that once I go back to the gym tomorrow and start eating healthy it will give me a fairly good start in my weight loss 🤞. The most I have ever lost was 6lbs so I’d love to get past that weight in a way that is sustainable for me.
    That cutting out 100cals is such a good idea! I never looked at it that way. I could definitely stick to that 😊

    Exercise isn't essential, but it does increase your daily calorie needs. If you're weight-stable to start, and increase exercise enough, you should start to lose weight. (It takes quite a bit of exercise to amount to a pound a week, or even half a pound a week, all by itself. It also takes multiple weeks for half a pound a week of fat loss to show up on the scale, because most of us find that daily weight fluctuates by multiple pounds day to day because of changes in water retention and digestive system contents in transit on the way to becoming waste.)

    Eating "healthy" is pretty much irrelevant, for weight loss, if by that you mean "eating healthy things and not eating bad things". (There really aren't "healthy" and "bad" foods, in any kind of universal sense.) A good overall balanced diet is good for health, though.

    For weight loss, what matters is how much you eat ( in calorie term), and getting that a little bit below the number of calories you burn (through daily life and exercise) the overwhelming majority of days. You don't absolutely need to *count* the calories to achieve that, but counting them can be a relatively easy method that works for many people.
  • sedrikp36
    sedrikp36 Posts: 2 Member
    The exercise part struggle... Your lucky.. Coz my struggle is asthma and a torn acl.. I get tired three times faster than an average person. Let this motivate you and not waste your potential... Go go go!
  • amioc
    amioc Posts: 175 Member
    edited May 2021
    Xtianne87 wrote: »
    If you do follow this routine or similar... please let us know how it is going xxx

    Yes of course I will ☺️ Xxx
  • crb426
    crb426 Posts: 661 Member
    Okay, if you’ve been trying and failing for three years you need to try something different. Doing the same thing is never going to work.

    Here’s my suggestion. Stop dieting, stop trying to “eat healthy” whatever that is, and figure out one small change to your permanent life which will net you 250 more calories per day. That’s maybe half an hour of activity if you pick the right activity, or you can do it with food, if you can identify one food you eat regularly which you want to swap for something else.

    Walking half an hour instead of eating an evening bag of chips would work. Taking up running or dancing three times a week for an hour would work. Deciding to eat berries and yogurt instead of ice cream would work, but only if you daily eat ice cream. I get the idea that there isn’t much give in your diet, and trying to cut is making you feel deprived, so that is never going to work in the long run. But adding a modest amount of activity will. If you make it “exercise” you are going to start feeling deprived again and quit. Don’t exercise, instead pick a hobby or activity which you enjoy.

    If you net 250 fewer calories per day you will gradually drift down in weight. It may not be fast enough to get you into the size you want this summer. But it will work and it will last.

    This is good advice. But I think it should be noted that this method will work best if also keeping track of calories. That way, you're not swapping out but ignoring the other calories for the day (and somehow eating back those swaps).
  • crb426
    crb426 Posts: 661 Member
    Sorry I think I misread the end bit asking me to let her know how it’s going 😕. I thought she meant her way and any of the suggestions that were posted above if you get what I mean? I most definitely will not be cutting out carbs. Also I will eat what I want as long as I keep within my calories, well that’s the idea anyway I have an awful job sticking within my calories 🙈!!!

    That makes sense. No worries.

    We've all been where you are. We have struggled with trying to figure out how to do this the right way for success. And that can be really hard for some people who have never eaten in a healthy manner before. Don't be discouraged. Follow the guidelines given to you, and read through the posts (pay attention to good advice vs bad advice). You will have success. :)
  • cvdub16
    cvdub16 Posts: 71 Member
    I am right there with you! I have been trying to loose weight for awhile and it just doesn't work I always loose focus. I know I am not much help but I feel ya!
  • meeppeepneep
    meeppeepneep Posts: 56 Member
    edited May 2021
    The only things I don't have in my house is things I can't have in moderations. So crisps and breakfast cereal. For most other things I can have a portion of it and be happy.

    My way to avoid snacking on sweet stuff throughout the day, and eating reasonably healthy, is to have the good (and expensive) icecream at home, and if I have calories left at the end of the day I get to have icecream. And that is better than a sad chocolate bar that I eat just because it's there.
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,307 Member
    Endocrinologists are rumoured to know something about hormones.

    Examine.com is often a good source (they don't sell supplements and, just as with MFP, I have yet to pay for extras when checking out things there)

    I find https://www.naturopathicdiaries.com/ to offer an interesting perspective on most naturopaths

    😱😹
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,307 Member
    edited May 2021
    amioc wrote: »
    Funny you should mention about the carbs because that’s what I’m constantly craving!!! How do I find out if it’s because of something? 💕

    You constantly crave: plain oats? Quinoa? Plain boiled unseasoned potatoes? Apples? Buckwheat? By themselves? Without extras? Plain pasta? No sauce. No seasoning. No butter. No oil. Plain carbs!? Do you often knaw on sugar cubes?

    Do you crave tasty food you enjoy and over eat... or carbs?

    (The above doesn't mean that I think all carbs are worth their calories; but it is meant to challenge your belief of what's at fault when you crave tasty, high calorie food combinations. And if you're a diabetic or pre diabetic, don't play with where you get treatment advice and yes the amount and timing of carbs you eat would matter beyond the level of preferences in that case)
  • amioc
    amioc Posts: 175 Member
    There are so many great suggestions here. I will add, sometimes accountability helps. You could hire a trainer or find a workout buddy. I would be happy to be your accountability partner. I need one as well. We could check in on each other?

    Yes please 😊 I would love that 💕
  • amioc
    amioc Posts: 175 Member
    PAV8888 wrote: »
    amioc wrote: »
    Funny you should mention about the carbs because that’s what I’m constantly craving!!! How do I find out if it’s because of something? 💕

    You constantly crave: plain oats? Quinoa? Plain boiled unseasoned potatoes? Apples? Buckwheat? By themselves? Without extras? Plain pasta? No sauce. No seasoning. No butter. No oil. Plain carbs!? Do you often knaw on sugar cubes?

    Do you crave tasty food you enjoy and over eat... or carbs?

    (The above doesn't mean that I think all carbs are worth their calories; but it is meant to challenge your belief of what's at fault when you crave tasty, high calorie food combinations. And if you're a diabetic or pre diabetic, don't play with where you get treatment advice and yes the amount and timing of carbs you eat would matter beyond the level of preferences in that case)

    I crave carbs like white bread, potato omelette, jacket potatoes, pasta, rice and crisps.
    I find that I want a lot of extra salt on meals.
    I haven’t been craving a lot of sweet things just chocolate around my time of of month 😕
  • PepeLPew
    PepeLPew Posts: 92 Member
    edited May 2021
    More thoughts that work for me:

    Sit down and put small, doable goals on paper. These need to actionable and entirely realistic. Stuff like "lose 15 pounds" isn't workable unless you have a steel mind. Something like "go walking for 25 minutes a day". Also write a weekly goal. Make these goals entirely achievable and every time you accomplish it, feel good about it. Small victories win the battle. As you go through the goals, increase them slightly so that you're always reaching. Over time, you will be miles ahead of where you first started.

    Having an activity tracker is good, but beware of the inflated calorie burn. My Versa 2 fitbit is laughably inflated. I go walking for 2 hours and it says I've done 1100 calories. What I DO use the tracker for is to measure my pace. Once I'm done, I use this online calculator: https://keisan.casio.com/exec/system/1350891527 and I input the data, get an estimate, and then do the same for MFP and compare. Usually they are similar in calorie burn.

    If I get less than 6 hours of sleep, my hunger shoots up most likely due to ghrelin and leptin increases and my general mood is crap. More than 7 hrs and I can do 2 full cardio work-outs per day and I hit all my goals.

    I generally don't eat my exercise calories back. If I have a good day on the Peloton, I can do almost 1k calories. I cannot possibly eat all of these back nor would I, but if I am feeling more hungry, I have calories to spare. I've done nearly 10k calories burned in the past 2-3 weeks according to my bike (I wear a HR monitor) and I have had cookies here or there. But I really watch it so that I do not surpass my calorie goal (even if a deficit is built-in).

    I didn't cut out anything: I ADDED stuff. More sleep, more activity, more accountability. I generally avoid sugar. I train my mind to focus on the calories burned through exercise. Then this really makes me consider what I eat because you switch focus from food as pleasure to food as fuel.

    I create easy to make, go-to meals. Breakfast is always oatmeal, flax, my coffee, fruit, OR omelets with turkey slices and some fruit with my coffee. This helps me avoid wasting time and calories in the fridge.

    Also when possible, I always go walking after I eat. I still have a bit of a stomach, but walking makes me feel less bloated. Sitting around after dinner makes me feel bleh, so after I'm done eating, I grab my fanny pack, extra charger, headphones, my phone and I put on music/podcasts and go walking for an hour or so. I also set up my fitbit to record my pace and heart rate.

    I also spend time planning food. I ensure the food I buy is conducive to my lifestyle. Fruit, lean meats, vegetables, etc. ANY type of exercise is great because it forces you to revisit your previous hard work: do you want to refuel your body with crap? Negate that 30 minutes' worth? Exercise for me anyways builds accountability.

    When I step on the scale weekly and I don't see a drop, I do feel disappointed, but I remind myself: the body will respond to the hard work and accountability you put into it. This is why I always try to focus on the benefits of exercise and healthy eating, and not as them simply a means to an end. I get a little ahead of myself when I go out full-steam but usually my body responds after a while.

    I never put myself down if I fail, and I do. I just remind myself to avoid the pitfall the following day. And when I feel good in a work out, I push myself a little harder just to see what I can gain.

    I need an anchor to fixate my motivation on. Find one that works for you. But it has to be a floating one so that you don't get bogged down. For me these anchors are minutes spent exercising, calories burned, number of workouts on my bike along with this strive number Peloton introduced last week. All of these drive me and every time I increase them, I celebrate with a big "YEAH!" and whoop it up for the day. My high lasts hours, actually.

    I journal every week. Sometimes a random thought will come in, like "don't always have a shake", or "balance your exercise regimen", or "use more of this...". I write these thoughts down. I also write down my accomplishments, and random goals that might be useful later on.

    If I do end up obsessing too much over numbers, etc I just drop everything and walk away. I constantly remind myself it isn't always about the numbers. At some point, things will kick in. It takes time to build routines. We live in a day and age where everything is instant. The body isn't. It will reward you but give it and yourself time.

    One thing I realized for the first time in my life is the effect consistent, intense exercise has on my mindset. I did 2 weeks straight of HIIT, 2x a day and my mind became Zen. First for me. Nothing creeped in - anxiety, anger, sadness, negative thoughts, etc. The buttressing power of exercise for the mind is really powerful. Walking is the best starting thing you can do in my opinion for low impact. Start small. When I did weight watchers years ago, I lost 30 pounds in 6 months. Portion control, points, and tons of walking. I would use google maps and chart my walking trips. Different directions, different areas. It became a ritual after a while, and I go to know my neighborhood really fast lol.

    Any longer term thinking I spend on this lifestyle change, it's how I will feel and look later on. I have an entire wardrobe waiting for me - stuff never worn because it longer fit. I also think about the gains I've made in the past 3 weeks and I look forward to changing things up. Day at a time :smiley:

    Hope some of this stuff works!
  • RuthSweetTooth
    RuthSweetTooth Posts: 461 Member
    Meet with a nutritionist. Your insurance will be happy to pay for it. Your employee wellness center has them for free probably without any copay. Buy an exercise bike and use it at least 20 minutes a day. Three times I week I try to do 40-50 minutes. Exercise is a big part of the problem. Yes, food is the other part. If you are drinking any soda with sugar or drinks with sugar you have to stop and switch to flavored water. I am successfully losing weight at 60 under the care of a nutritionist. My husband has also lost weight. I have lost 17 pounds since November. It's been a slow learning process. My blood work and blood sugar are improving. Weight is falling faster as get the hang of it more.
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,617 Member
    amioc wrote: »
    PAV8888 wrote: »
    amioc wrote: »
    Funny you should mention about the carbs because that’s what I’m constantly craving!!! How do I find out if it’s because of something? 💕

    You constantly crave: plain oats? Quinoa? Plain boiled unseasoned potatoes? Apples? Buckwheat? By themselves? Without extras? Plain pasta? No sauce. No seasoning. No butter. No oil. Plain carbs!? Do you often knaw on sugar cubes?

    Do you crave tasty food you enjoy and over eat... or carbs?

    (The above doesn't mean that I think all carbs are worth their calories; but it is meant to challenge your belief of what's at fault when you crave tasty, high calorie food combinations. And if you're a diabetic or pre diabetic, don't play with where you get treatment advice and yes the amount and timing of carbs you eat would matter beyond the level of preferences in that case)

    I crave carbs like white bread, potato omelette, jacket potatoes, pasta, rice and crisps.
    I find that I want a lot of extra salt on meals.
    I haven’t been craving a lot of sweet things just chocolate around my time of of month 😕

    White bread, potatoes, pasta and rice probably do get much of the calories from carbohydrates.
    Crisps have some carbs, but most get a large fraction of their calories from fat.
    Potato omelette, depending on how you make it, could be quite a healthful, balanced food with protein, carbs, and fat.
    Jacket potatoes actually have a decent bit of nutrition, besides just carbohydrates: Fiber, a bit of protein, and some iron, potassium, vitamin C. Research suggest that many people find potatoes quite filling, which can be useful when reducing calories. (The big calories usually come in from the things we put on the potato: Butter, sour cream, cheese, gravy, etc.)

    In general, I wouldn't think of those as "carbs" so much as think of them as tempting and tasty foods you enjoy, that are easy to over-eat.

    With portion control, you should be able to eat some of any of those foods, and some of them could be good contributors to an overall healthy diet.

    You say you like a lot of salt on your food. Do you have high blood pressure or another health condition that requires you to limit salt? If not, then focusing on salt right away may be more of a distraction than a help.

    At this point, I'm wondering whether you're using such a strict definition of "healthy eating" that it's hard for you to stick with your calorie goal long enough to lose weight, let alone keep weight in a healthy range permanently.

    You got the suggestion above to count calories. It's a good one. Consider just logging what you eat now normally (when not "dieting"), and see how it stacks up against your calorie goal.

    Many of us find, when we do that, that there are things that make us think "wow, I didn't know that had *that* many calories, and I don't think it's worth that many to me", and we reduce or eliminate those foods, especially if they're not making a great contribution to nutrition. (Nutrition will also show in your MFP food log.)

    Usually there are some reductions that are fairly painless. If that's not enough to hit the calorie goal, then it may be necessary to eat some favored foods in smaller portions, or less frequently, substituting other foods we like that better help with our goals (calories, nutrition, tastiness, practicality, etc.).

    If that kind of approach appeals to you, figuring out how to remodel your eating to hit you calorie and nutrition goals while eating mostly things you enjoy, and treats in sensible portions, you might consider this thread:

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10636388/free-customized-personal-weight-loss-eating-plan-not-spam-or-mlm/p1

    That's how I lost 50+ pounds in less than a year, while pretty old (59-60), and hypothyroid besides (if anyone thinks it matters; I don't), and how I've stayed at a healthy weight for 5+ years since, after previous decades of obesity. I didn't particularly increase exercise to lose (but I was already pretty active while obese).

    Yo-yo dieting, repeated often, is stressful for your body, and arguably bad for your health. It also doesn't work, in the sense that (IMO) the real goal should be to find sustainable habits - both eating and activity - that make it easier to stay at a healthy weight all the time, permanently.

    Losing 12 pounds between now and June probably isn't practical. It's a short timespan, and you'll want to arrive at summer lively, energetic, vivacious, with glowing complexion, thick & glossy hair, strong nails, etc. Those latter things - which are also important to appearance - can be compromised with fast weight loss. Better to go for a slower loss rate, stay healthy and vital, get some good exercise and nutrition, and see where you end up in a couple of months. I'm betting that'll be a better place than another yo-yo attempt would get you.

    Best wishes!
  • PepeLPew
    PepeLPew Posts: 92 Member
    edited May 2021
    charmmeth wrote: »
    @PepeLPew, depending on how many calories you are eating, not eating any exercise calories back could mean that you are seriously undereating. If you have used 1000 calories on exercise and are planning to eat 1500 cals before exervcise, then your net is 500 cals, and that is not enough. Do be careful.

    Agreed. Ever day I eat between 1760 and 1900 calories. I have only hit the 1k calorie mark once and that day I was quite hungry so I will eat back to satiety. I cannot force myself to eat more than feeling full or else I will be completely sick. At this point I am going with how my body and mind feel. If I continue to have high calorie burn then I will update my fitness profile to compensate. But I am so weary of the actual number of calories I burn. I've learned over the years that my fibit is really inaccurate regarding calories burned walking so I take those numbers with a grain of salt. I wear a heart monitor for my bike rides which apparently gives me a more accurate reading.
  • aavs73
    aavs73 Posts: 4 Member
    Can someone tell me what the World's Best Calorie Tracker Gadget is? Something that will integrate with My Fitness Pal. I'm struggling to count calories !