Scared to step on the scale
Replies
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TheWaistBasket wrote: »Tomorrow it's 2 weeks since I signed up here and I haven't stepped on the scale. I am scared. I have ignored the scale for years and now I am terrified. I am so motivated, what if the number will crush me?
What if I didn't lose enough to keep me going. What if I gained? What if I only lost 1 or 2 lb?
How often should someone like me weigh anyway? I want to be under 350 lb. badly. How long will it take to lose 12 or 13 lb?
I am weighing my food, I am logging. I stay mostly under 1800 calories/day. I must have lost weight. (But what if not?)
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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TheWaistBasket wrote: »So much good advice. Thanks. I will weigh in once a week. Every Friday morning before the weekendTheWaistBasket wrote: »Taking measurements sounds like a good idea. I am going to buy a soft measuring tape this weekend, also I will buy a new scale. If I can find a modern with a higher weight limit.
So is tape a nice data point? Why yes, it is. Can it reliably offer insight into weekly level progress? I am not so sure. I would think of tape measurements more along the lines of helping me marvel at multi-month level progress!
Also measurements across scales do not transfer directly. One scale can show me up or down 1, 2, 3 or even 5lbs compared to another scale. And that's now when I'm within the normal bmi range.
So it sounds like this is your initial weight measurement? The one I am always ticked at myself for never getting because when I was at my highest (and above my analogue scale's maximum) I wasn't even willing to step on a scale till my analogue scale could measure me again?
You need to take a deep breath my friend. A really deep one.
You are in a position where you want to change your life's trajectory a bit, right?
I mean regardless of the exact number we can all agree that you're not expecting it to already be in the "onederland" you are aiming to eventually get to!
And regardless of the exact number you're looking at a good couple of years before you get there, and at least another two to three before you're reasonably certain that you can hold yourself there through life's continuous changes. So this is a long term process... and it will pay for you to concentrate and work on the process instead of worrying much about distractions! :
Concentrate on finding easy trade off you're willing to make between higher calorie and more filling foods. Concentrate on figuring why you eat sometimes and what you could be doing instead. Worry about eating more like the person you want to be like in five years. Worry more about *slowly* starting to become more active in your daily life and working towards the level of activity your future you will be able to enjoy.
Whatever your current weight is... it is your starting point. It is not your ending point!
If you worry and concentrate on the process the weight change will follow.
If you do weekly weight ins, that's fine. I would still plug the values into a weight trend app. Or in an app that will allow you to transfer the info to a weight trend app in the future.
The scale weight number is not a validation of YOU; but, it *IS* an __indication__ of whether your chosen process is working as expected and whether you may have to re-examine and make sure you're still "on course"3 -
TheWaistBasket wrote: »Well say you DIDN'T lose enough.............what's your choice then? To quit and continue on a path of gaining weight and risking health issues as you age OR continue on and consistently lose a little at a time DECREASING your risk?
I guess only time will tell. I will keep you informed.3 -
Did you weigh in today, or are you waiting until next Friday? If you did, how did it go?0
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I am going to be honest, and do so as gently and lovingly as I can:
You HAVE to work on your mind, here. This + your profile leads me to believe that you are relying very much on success to motivate you. That is okay, to a degree.
But you are not going to lose weight quickly. You are not going to lose weight every week or even every other week. You are NOT always going to have motivation.
And the way you're eating now is, ultimately, about how you're going to need to live for the rest of your life. Without the little boost of of the scale dropping. Sometimes in spite of it bouncing UP.
You're at the start. You recognize these things about you. This is a great time to get that stuff untangled and to set yourself up to be successful. With professional help if you need it.6 -
wunderkindking wrote: »I am going to be honest, and do so as gently and lovingly as I can:
You HAVE to work on your mind, here. This + your profile leads me to believe that you are relying very much on success to motivate you. That is okay, to a degree. But you are not going to lose weight quickly. You are not going to lose weight every week or even every other week. You are NOT always going to have motivation.
And the way you're eating now is, ultimately, about how you're going to need to live for the rest of your life. Without the little boost of of the scale dropping. Sometimes in spite of it bouncing UP. You're at the start. You recognize these things about you. This is a great time to get that stuff untangled and to set yourself up to be successful. With professional help if you need it.
Of course I need motivation. Who doesn't? Of course I would like to see success. Who doesn't?
My mindset is fine, I am here. :-)
I know what you mean, and you might be right, but I know how I work best. Motivation at the beginning will keep me going. Small setbacks won't distract me, but overall success is my motivation. Here and in real life.
I did seek professional help from a dietician and will go back.4 -
I am semi scale phobic. I suffer from "body dysmorphia" meaning my self image is not acurate or reflective of reality. I weigh everyday and often strongly dislike what I record. For me it's about staying present and accountable. I know I'm not where I want to be. The scale hasn't told me anything I didn't already know aside from assigning the unsatisfactory image with a number. That number is extremely helpful because by weighing everyday I know how much diet and exercise to put in. Look at it if you will like taking medicine. I take my medicine every morning and I dislike it every morning. It takes about 14days to adjust to weighing daily but I wouldn't have lost any weight if I didn't. It's easy to say I'm working hard and deserve a treat if you aren't weighing in because you're not aware of exactly how far you are from your goal. I need the rigid perspective not of a friend but of a machine that wont lie to me to protect my feelings. I never ignored my weight or had problems identifying when it's out of control. A healthy weight for my tiny frame would be 125lbs-130lbs nothing higher. I have a long hard road ahead of me. I personally need to build muscle and lose fat which is harder than just making that weigh in. You don't need to weigh in every day necessarily but I think you are far more likly to reach improvement by weighing in no less than weekly. Yes reality hurts feelings but I'd say in your heart you know your weight is unhealthy. Once you have a number with the picture your mirror gave you there is hope. Inch my inch we get the chance to climb out of the hole we dug and improve that first number. Remember to watch youtube videos of what 5lbs of fat looks like it's a lot. I lost 0lbs my first 3 weeks of hard work. At first I was sad but I kept going because I noticed my weight wasn't going up. Eventually it started going down. My weight and pants size dropped but it wasn't as satisfying as others find. My weight was so far above my goal that even lowered it was unsatisfactory to me. Little by little I'm reaching for my goal and throughout this process I only saw my start weight on the scale until I started going down. Even when my weight fluctuates up it never goes above 10lbs lower than where I started. At my most bloated I'm still 2 pants sizes smaller. If you keep this up for 1year I guarentee you will lose enough to be proud of yourself. Day by day we'll get there. You see for some of us it's not just losing weight that's an accomplishment but also not gaining weight because we were steadily going up without leveling out or losing weight for a long time. Remember the scale is not your self worth it's a measuring tool. We start because our weight is climbing and it takes time + hard work to get the scale to lay horizontally meaning we're no longer gaining. It takes more time + hard work for our weight to lower. Once you get the hang of it though you'll see the changes you want little by little until your not as afraid of weigh ins. After a good weightloss streak you may even start to take pride in weigh ins. Good luck.7
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Also to recap your first weigh in CANNOT be bad. Without knowing where you started 2weeks ago you have no idea what you lost it could've been 15lbs or 0.2lbs. You have to remember that and keep going 2 more weeks to get a good idea of how your weightloss is going. Often we went up far more than we admitted to ourselves so after hard work the weigh in is still devistating without seeing the dramatic improvement because you didn't track the first 2 weeks. The first weigh in is SW meaning Start Weight. Without it we have no measure of what we lost or how our work is affecting our body. Accept the SW as the beginning and keep going.🙂4
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The weight didn’t get put on overnight, nor will it be gone overnight. It takes time. There is no finish line. I’m not data driven like a lot of people here, I’m results driven. I like to see actual, physical progress at work and when I first started losing weight. And I did, for a bit. Then you hit a plateau, that seemingly no matter what you do, you are stuck. But you keep after it. Keep doing what you know you need to do, and then, just like that, it kick starts again. There will be times that you will ask yourself if it is even worth all the effort. It is. You are. People are very helpful around here. I wish you all the best on your journey.2
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Weighing yourself is eventually something you should do. I hate the scale and many times and stretches of time.. I don't weigh..I use tight clothes as a way to track my progress. But weighing yourself is the best way to make sure you are on the right track..losing.. and it is vital in maintenance ..as you can gain five or more pounds without even knowing it because clothes still fit.
Also..don't let the reality of current weight fool with your head, or resolve to get this done. Sometimes the emotional turmoil of manning up and facing the facts can be used an excuse as a reason to quit. It is just the devil on your shoulder trying to keep you from improving yourself.5 -
TheWaistBasket wrote: »wunderkindking wrote: »I am going to be honest, and do so as gently and lovingly as I can:
You HAVE to work on your mind, here. This + your profile leads me to believe that you are relying very much on success to motivate you. That is okay, to a degree. But you are not going to lose weight quickly. You are not going to lose weight every week or even every other week. You are NOT always going to have motivation.
And the way you're eating now is, ultimately, about how you're going to need to live for the rest of your life. Without the little boost of of the scale dropping. Sometimes in spite of it bouncing UP. You're at the start. You recognize these things about you. This is a great time to get that stuff untangled and to set yourself up to be successful. With professional help if you need it.
Of course I need motivation. Who doesn't? Of course I would like to see success. Who doesn't?
My mindset is fine, I am here. :-)
I know what you mean, and you might be right, but I know how I work best. Motivation at the beginning will keep me going. Small setbacks won't distract me, but overall success is my motivation. Here and in real life.
I did seek professional help from a dietician and will go back.
I understand this. Everybody wants success because if you don't achieve it, why bother, right? But this kind of success takes lots of change in habits, finding new habits to replace the old, thinking positive, being patient, being gentle with yourself and don't berate yourself if you have an off day or week(just get back to it).
TBH I've lost/gained so much weight throughout my lifetime....When I had a lot to lose, usually the 1st week or 2 I'd lose 5-10#. Ex. I weighed 200 when I went to WW the first time. When I went back the next week I'd lost 10. I was ecstatic. But the next 3 weeks I lost a pound a week. Still good but I was very impatient and wanted to be done.
Oh I've learned so much since then.
Take your time, learn, experiment and adjust as you go. Try to have fun while you're doing this. Maybe find a new activity or hobby you like to keep your hands/mind busy. Enjoy life every single day, which is what we should all be doing no matter what our scales tell us.7 -
I can't believe it. I have lost 14 pounds. I am so happy! It's working.
14 pounds in the first 19 days! That's the motivation I was hoping for.14 -
Yes! I'm so happy for you. Just don't look at the scale as your enemy. I weigh myself everyday and keep a log of that. Then I can gauge by my food diary what changed if I happen to gain some and do better next time. I also only report my weight change on the last day of the month which makes me stay on track for the month.2
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OK, I've been here before.
One big thing is de-mystifying weight. YOUR WEIGHT IS NOT YOUR WORTH. Repeat: YOUR WEIGHT IS NOT YOUR WORTH.
I know it's scary to actually look at your weight. But it also *is* the first step in just seeing really where you are. But what it is NOT is a judgement.2 -
kenyonhaff wrote: »OK, I've been here before.
One big thing is de-mystifying weight. YOUR WEIGHT IS NOT YOUR WORTH. Repeat: YOUR WEIGHT IS NOT YOUR WORTH.
I know it's scary to actually look at your weight. But it also *is* the first step in just seeing really where you are. But what it is NOT is a judgment.
My weight is the judgment of my actions. I see clearly now who I am, that's why I am here. I am heavily overweight, morbidly obese, almost housebound due to my overeating. I am not much worth feeling sick and unhealthy, hardly able to move.
I am a big woman who is unhappy with the way she feels.
What made you think you needed to give me the "weight is not your worth" speech. Was I too happy because I had a first big loss?0 -
TheWaistBasket wrote: »I can't believe it. I have lost 14 pounds. I am so happy! It's working.
14 pounds in the first 19 days! That's the motivation I was hoping for.
Proud of you!
Now, as you move forward and keep working toward your lifestyle change, remind yourself that this early success will not be typical for you. It is not reasonable to expect to see another 14-lb loss three weeks from now, so be prepared for that - don't let it derail you if you step on the scale again this time next month and see "only" a 3-4 lb loss. A pound per week is excellent progress. The glossy magazine cover promising that you'll drop 40 lbs in 40 minutes with this one weird trick or some bullsh*t like that is filled with lies, that's not how real sustainable weight loss works.
Part of those 14 lbs was also probably water. I don't know exactly how much, but it's also important to keep in mind that water fluctuates much more readily than fat, which can mask fat loss on the scale. So, at some point, you will spend a week doing everything right - tracking every molecule of food you eat, sticking to your calorie budget, meeting all your exercise goals, generally rocking the pants off of living your life like the awesome human you are - and you'll step on the scale and see no change, or a slight gain. Do not panic. It's water. You retain water for all sorts of reasons, like repairing muscles after a good workout or because your electrolytes are a bit imbalanced or because you're due to start menstruating soon if that's something your body does. Trust the process. We're not trying to lose water, we're trying to lose fat, and we're trying to lose it for good so we gotta take it slow. IME, when I do everything right and see no change or a slight gain on the scale, I usually get a "whoosh" in the next couple of weeks where I suddenly see a huge drop (by "huge" I mean 2-3 lbs, I'm aiming for 0.5-1lb per week), because I was retaining water.
Edit to add: On another topic entirely, if as you progress on your journey you find it difficult for your mental health to see the number on the scale, there are some Bluetooth/wifi-enabled scales out there that don't have a display at all, they just sync with your phone and log your weight on an app there. You could use one of those and then just not check the app or only check it when you feel ready to know.3 -
The_Movie_Chair wrote: »I decided to take the daily fluctuation out of it and I will step on the scale once a month but measure myself (neck/chest/waist/hip/arms/tights/calves) every week.
I will also take pictures in the same outfit once a week but will blur my face.
This. I didn’t take progress photos until about five months in when my then-new trainer started emailing them to me.
It took two years or more before I could look in the mirror and see any changes. My brain and common sense knew and acknowledged there were changes on the scale, in the loosening clothes. My eyes couldn’t or wouldn’t see the changes, though.
There were many months when those weekly photos were what kept me on the right track. Kept me sane.
For whatever reason, I could clearl see change in photos, but not in that mirror. Crazy, right? Lots of people here mention the same issue.
Don’t let your Fat Eyes mislead you.
Good for you on the initial success! Keep punching forward!2
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