What nobody tells you about losing weight
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That you won't see it right away, and when you do it might not be in the places you expected.
I've hopped back on track almost a year after falling off of it. I gained close to 15 lbs in that time, and after about 2 1/2 weeks of actively working at weight loss again I've lost a little bit, but didn't really see any change until I noticed that my face is looking slimmer.9 -
I didn't realize that I had such strong emotional associations with particular weights and sizes. That is, when I get down to certain sizes/lbs, it triggers memories of other times in my life that I was there. Some good, some not. I knew weight loss would be emotional, but it's almost like I have to stop and release different experiences along with the pounds. If I don't, I can feel myself start to freak out and begin sabotaging behaviors. A massage therapist friend of mine used to say, "The issues are in the tissues," and that's proven more true for me than I expected. Each pound of fat contains a story. Some leave joyfully, but others bring up drama.
People always say, "it's a good problem to have" when you drop a clothing size or another five pounds and it is. But you can also feel a little lost and not sure who you are anymore. And you can flashback to old parts of your life that you thought were long dealt with. All because the scale number changed or you suddenly needed a smaller size of underwear. You feel like you should be happy, and you ARE but it's mixed in with all this other stuff. I didn't expect that. I thought I would be unequivocably thrilled to be smaller and feel pretty, but it's going to take dealing with some old crap to get to enjoy it fully.
I think maybe this is why I have regained in the past, because I didn't stop and address the negative emotions that went with being smaller. So part of me wasn't on board with the weight loss. This time I want to lose these pounds for good, and that means slowing down to attend to the mental/emotional stuff.53 -
WifeDeputy wrote: »ne of my biggest things was learning how to nest my knees for sleeping at night. What does this mean?
It means that some of us learn we now have super bony knees and we can't comfortably stack one on top of the other while sleeping on our sides. I had something like that happen for a bit as my thighs lost padding and for a while my spine was out of alignment when I slept.
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Sand_TIger wrote: »WifeDeputy wrote: »ne of my biggest things was learning how to nest my knees for sleeping at night. What does this mean?
It means that some of us learn we now have super bony knees and we can't comfortably stack one on top of the other while sleeping on our sides. I had something like that happen for a bit as my thighs lost padding and for a while my spine was out of alignment when I slept.
I ordered the thinnest memory foam pillow I could find on Amazon. It has really helped. I don’t like knees, shins, ankles or feet touching each other now, for some reason.10 -
Wow. Lots of great stories, ideas and trials.
what do i do with the hanging skin ?
fear of gaining it all back.
Men coming on to you when you were invisible before. Not good enough fat, not good enough skinny.
Do i keep 3 sizes of clothes yet ?
Confidence and doubts.17 -
Acne. For some reason, I got a rash of spots on my neck when losing weight that stuck around until I stopped losing.
That horrible quote of Kate Moss’s, “ nothing tastes as good as skinny feels”? Not entirely as ridiculous as it sounds.
Comments on what you eat somehow are acceptable just because you are slim !
Wolf whistling still happens in your 40s once you lose the weight - euw
You might struggle to recognise your reflection and butt up against the self you were when last this size - very confusing
Shopping gets really easy when you are the smallest size of every range!
I dropped a shoe size and that was really sad as my shoes were my one joy when overweight.
I kept all my slim clothes thinking it wouldn’t take as long as it did to get back into them. Now of my larger wardrobe, I’ve learned to only keep the expensive, classic pieces7 -
Funny moment today.
I was readjusting my office chair and couldn't find out why it wouldn't go down, only up.
I thought the pneumatic cylinder was broken, but it turns out I simply wasn't heavy enough to push down the mechanism, it worked fine when my BF sat in my chair 😁32 -
For me, it's more about things people didn't tell me about gaining weight. I am at my highest weight and I never thought it would be difficult as a heavier person to paint my own toenails, wipe my own butt (it's not that I can't do it obviously, but I have to twist & bend my back more because I got bigger), or be hot and sweaty after trying on clothes in a store. Some everyday, simple tasks are more challenging and it is an inspiration to get back to the old me because these things really suck.
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That sometimes you have to actually argue with people to get incidental exercise into your day. If you want to drive a 10 minute walk, fine, but I have legs and I like using them for the purpose they were made for!12
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I've learned to appreciate dresses and skirts. They last longer when loosing weight, because pants get too big but you can always put on a dress.
At the same time body dysmorphia gets real. I need to double check sizes and still get it wrong most time now.16 -
Losing weight at a decent rate can be expensive when it comes to clothing lol. Last time I was here. I lost 100lbs and was buying new clothes every month for almost a year.
Reconciling the difference between body weight and fitness is something I have always struggled with. I'm 6'3" with a lean body mass of 243lbs. Being 50yo, 20% body fat is my realistic goal which pushes me to almost 300lbs. When I was younger I would have thought that 300lbs would be outrageously fat. Now it is really strong and just a big guy lol12 -
DezYaoified wrote: »No one said family/friends would try to sabotage me.
They may have fell in the category I did, where one "celebrates" and "rewards" with food. I had to change that mentality and behavior. I have a long journey ahead of me - and I have lost 80lbs. I had to re-establish what I consider rewards. But it sounds like the friend/family member is attempting to celebrate your loss with food. It does feel like active sabotage, and my hubby has done certain sabotaging behavior towards me as well. I realized that is how he has always been treated, so he is trying to be kind. And I am certain that he considers my not eating with him kind of standoffish - but now it is a thing. In a day I will get my protein, carbs, and oils in - just sort of 1 meal a heavy protein veggie, then a dinner as a veggie with less protein and some carbs. I can't deal with his meal and my meal being the same. I just can't seem to plan it right.
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Why do people feel that it's their business to comment on what I'm eating? "Oh, look at you eating all healthy." Like, really????
Also, sometimes people are concerned about commenting on weight because it can be a sore spot or inappropriate. I certainly don't mind if someone asks if I've lost weight. Others get offended. I think for myself, it's motivating when they do make the comment that the weight is coming off.
We were out on vacation last week and my husband said we should buy a carton of ice cream. I told him I would much rather not, but if he wanted ice cream, to go to the shop and get one any time he wanted to, but not to ask me to go with him. He understood and was supportive. Then there are times he brings home sweets .... ugh, so frustrating sometimes.10 -
It amazes me that people see a woman and feel compelled to make comments about her size. Since last March I have lost 83.6 lbs. and people just have to keep telling me how tiny I am. I'm 5'7" wear a large shirt and a 26 or 27x32" pants. and don't feel tiny. I look like a python who swallowed a goat. It is very disconcerting to hear tiny or big . Mainly because my body image still does not see me as the size I am. And I just don't appreciate hearing it no matter what size I am.16
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So, the people the side sleepers... when you lost weight sleeping got more painful? I lost 80 lbs, and really thought it would help the hip pain that I associated with gaining weight - especially at night. I am in the same amount of pain, granted I was never told when I lost weight it would be less painful - it was kind of an assumption. Is the sleeping pain related to weight? Or did it just happen to me at the same time? I am so confused, I was thinking less weight = less pain.6
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@justanotherloser007, Hi, I have always been a side sleeper. too. Weight loss hasn't made much of a difference comfort wise(except that I have to adjust my knee position). I will experience pain in my neck if my pillow lacks support but usually replace them. Maybe you need a new mattress and or boxspring or reposition the slats under your sleep set if it's not firm enough or a mattress topper if too hard.
I have a latex mattress, so no pressure points. Have had it for 15 years and it's still going strong. Have found that the amount of firmness that I needed got less as I lost weight but everyone's experience may be different.5 -
You don't deflate evenly. I have a waist now but there's all this fat/skin junk sagging and hanging out all round my lower hips and belly. Also fat/skin hanging down around my knees when it didn't used to. I suppose it gets worse before it gets better.10
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I definitely noticed that after a significant weight loss that I am always looking at myself and how cute I am! I know that this is totally vein, but it has been a confidence booster in that way!
This is complety true. I've lost 125 pounds. Still another 80 or so to go. But I told a buddy last month that this is honestly the first time in my life that I've been attracted to myself. I'm still not most of the time. But I look in the mirror alot more, take more pictures, and every once in awhile I'll catch myself thinking wow, I might actually be attractive.
It's not vein either. I can't speak for everyone. But having spent 15ish years unattracted to myself, this is good body positivity and absolutely helps with confidence.22 -
penguinmama87 wrote: »Sand_TIger wrote: »Something else nobody every told me about weight loss is how GOOD healthy food would taste. I've enjoyed fruit more than any candy, and a really good yogurt with fruit on it is almost as good as ice cream. I'm amazed at how tasty lean protein and vegetables can be when cooked right. Yes, the body can indeed be trained into craving the healthy stuff, just as I wished would happen back in the day when eating junk.
You know the old refrain "why can't the healthy stuff taste as good as stuff that's bad for me?"
It CAN!
Yes!
And on the other hand, some of the "junk" is no longer palatable to me and it's kind of astonishing I used to eat it and like it. There's a couple things I still enjoy, but I think nostalgia may be a very big part of that and it overwhelms my other senses.
This. I haven't noticed that healthy food tastes better, but my sweet tooth is definitely gone. I'll take a plate of fries or some chicken over chocolate or desert any day. Ans that was never the case before.
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