Divorced dad diet

Heyooo, I'm 19 and new to this community. I've been overweight, if not obese, my entire life. I won't go in to it, but let's just say my parents sucked in the whole nurturing department. I've spent countless hours neurotically planning out whatever diet I decided was the "key" to my success. My highest and current weight is 265lbs, so obviously something wasn't working. I'm in the unfortunate position of having a yet to be fully developed brain, so grand efforts at health are out of the question. Plus my ADHD and depression are basically begging me to fail.

So I have decided to live as if I am the child of a middle aged divorcee, he's a little disgruntled but his heart is in the right place. I think I'll name him Tim. Breakfast is cereal with a bit of peanut butter, fruit, and a yogurt. Lunch is a sandwich of some sort, starting with chickpea. And dinner is something like a bird's eye meal, or healthy canned soup, and can't forget the salad mix with a sad drizzle of store bought vinaigrette.

That's all (◍•ᴗ•◍)

Replies

  • booboo1000
    booboo1000 Posts: 58 Member
    Hi @CaughtAVibe

    Welcome! After reading your meal thoughts I wonder if this will be enough calories for you to stay on a new eating plan. As much as we all want to change our weight quickly, slow but sure seems to be the best strategy for lasting success.

    Don't change everything at once. Build on your changes and successes. Learn as you go what motivates you and from what doesn't work for you.
    It might take time to find the right social support for your best success but look for people in real life and here who are positive and help you feel good about what you are doing.
    Small weight loss goals, maybe 10 pounds a month at the most.

    I wish I had done more at your age!
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,626 Member
    The key in losing weight, and take this from someone who has lost 230 pounds, is to make small, SUSTAINABLE changes. this is a long term effort. not a sprint. you will not lose weight fast. you will not lose weight every week. you will have weeks on end with NO weight loss. its normal. trust the process.

    my main tips:

    learn how to weigh (on a food scale) your food properly and find ACCURATE database entries now. I don't know what your starting weight is, but at first you may have a lot of room for error. but as you have less to lose, you don't. If you learn how to do things properly from the beginning, it means you don' have to RE-LEARN how to do it later.

    Find an activity you ENJOY. You don't have to be a runner (ew). You don't have to work out at all to lose weight (weight loss happens in the kitchen). BUT... physical activity does have a LOT of benefits. Both mental and physical. It can be as simple as a leisurely stroll a few times a week. And as you lose weight, you may find (I did), that you WANT to do more. Simple, little things like parking a bit further out in parking lots. Taking stairs instead of elevators. walking to your mailbox instead of pulling up to it in your car as you are pulling in your driveway. Small things. Every bit counts.

    Understand that you do not have to give up your favorite foods or any food groups to lose weight. You DO need to learn how MUCH you can eat. Portion control. This goes back to my first point. For the most part, I eat the same things I always have. Just less of them. I eat burgers and pizza and chips and cookies. Just ... not all in the same day ;) well, I might could get away with it if I planned it out REALLY well. And stuck to the plan with NO deviation. Maybe. LOL

    You will have 'bad' days. Whether its a holiday or just a ... bad day. Life happens. you will go over. It is NOT the end of the world. You will not ruin your deficit with one bad day. The problems come in when that one bad day becomes two, becomes 3, becomes a week, and goes on....

    You've got this. Take it one day at a time, and each day, try to do a little bit better. Don't try to do everything all at once. Don't try to make 1000 changes all at once. Most people who burn out, do so because they try to do too much, too soon. start small. build from there. You did not gain the weight quickly. You will not lose it quickly. Better to lose it slowly, and KEEP IT OFF, then lose it quick, and gain it all back and more!

    I've been at this a long time. It becomes a part of your life, and like any other habit, you don't think about it much, really. Your eating habits slowly change. You weigh and log your food. Your activity levels (usually) change, at least to some degree. You become more mindful of what you are putting in your shopping cart and body. My one (or two) words of caution is to make these changes slowly. Most people who go 'All in' head first and full steam, burn out quick. Your first couple of weeks, maybe even first month, most people will lose a fair amount fairly quickly, but most of it is water weight (usually from a reduction in carbs). It does slow down, as your body adjusts. It's normal, and is SUPPOSED to happen, so don't get discouraged. Also, don't set your calories too low. The fastest rate of loss (1200 for women and 1500 for men) is not the best rate of loss for the majority of people. Although very tempting to set it to lose faster, it will make it harder for you to maintain and stick to your calorie goals because you will be ... well, hungry. Be kind to yourself, give yourself a few more calories, and you will still lose weight and be less likely to deviate from your plan and therefore more likely to succeed. :)

    Being so young, you need more calories than a 40 year old man with a sedentary office job. 10 pounds a month weight loss like the previous poster said is unrealistic unless you weigh 400 pounds.


    Useful Links
    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1234699/logging-accurately-step-by-step-guide/p1
    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1296011/calorie-counting-101/p1

    and basically ... all of these :)

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10300319/most-helpful-posts-general-health-fitness-and-diet-must-reads#latest


    when i first started working out, i didnt even consider it that. i just wanted to try and be a bit healthier. losing weight wasn't even my goal. I mean, i needed to, and knew i needed to, but i just wanted to try and be healthier. I started by just going on a walk 2-3 times a week. and.... it wasn't much of a walk. at almost 400 pounds i could not go very far at all. 10 minutes was about all i had in me. but i kept doing it. and it didnt take long, really, before i could go a little bit longer. and then, i started to go more often. always when it was dark, i didnt want people to SEE me - but id go after dark, or early in the morning. often, both. more days added. my neighbor was a member at planet fitness and asked me if i wanted to go with her (she only went occasionally). I said sure. So I'd go with her. i thought i was going to die on the elliptical. lasted about 7 minutes. But kept going. maybe once a week with her? not very often. kept walking. By that point had started watching what I was eating (i think). Then i wanted to go to the gym more than she did, so got my own membership. That was back in 2014. You dont have to work out to lose weight. As I said, that happens in the kitchen. But it does have many other benefits that your body does need. Find something you enjoy. Most Y's are affordable and have a wide variety of classes for all fitness levels. Make small changes. dont try to change everything overnight. little changes can lead to giant ones, if you give it enough time.


  • CaughtAVibe
    CaughtAVibe Posts: 3 Member
    Thanks for the advice!! I need all the help I can get lol