how do you stay motivated with a large goal

springlering62 wrote: »

I tried to keep my mouth zipped, but I can’t.

Maybe a totally harsh militant attitude works for you. I was pretty inflexible when I started, too. I bet every one of us was pretty “gung ho, let’s do this”
at the start.

But I soon found that life pretty much sucked without good food and celebrations, and good food and celebrations generally come with calories.

So I let regulated and controlled amounts back in, and occasionally give myself the grace to just have at it for a day or two, too.

Welcome, Doughnut Sundays!!!

In absolute fairness I wasn't gung-ho at the outset.

I am incredibly, hugely, to the point of rigidity, anti-rigidity and find 'go big or go home' attitudes in life in general toxic as heck. This is because I AM OBSESSIVE AS HOLY HECK so I had to be slow and easy and, uh, pretty gung-ho and rigid about not being gung-ho and rigid.

Basically I learned how much that doesn't work for me and my mental health too, I just happened to be lucky and learn it before I even approached weight loss. Learned it with dog sports, actually. You ever try to be 'all or nothing' and 'perfectionist' with a dog as your sports partner? Bad plan. Good lesson, but BAD PLAN.

fatfish420 wrote: »

by large goal I don't necessarily mean difficult but one that is going to be a long journey. In my case my goal weight when I started was to lose 180lbs I have lost just over 30 so far but nothing feels like it has changed. I am still wearing the same clothes and I can still get out of breath doing simple tasks. So I want to know from those who are either on long journeys or have reached their goal how do you stay motivated when the results while numerically significant don't show anywhere else.

I’ve been steadily losing 85 pounds from a high of 330 in July 2019, but started MFP in 2015 and had a couple loss-regain cycles before I figured out what worked for me.

Like others have said, I’ve learned to focus on habits, small habits like weighing myself and logging that into Fitbit, logging my food, weighing my food, and stacking in exercise as I’m able (I have an autoimmune muscle disease that limits my exercise at times).

My health sends me curveballs on the regular, so I have my habits set up with “basics,” “easy,” and “goals” in my mind. On my best of days, I strive for my goal habits. On rough patches, I rest back and slide by on my “easy habits.” When *kitten* really hits the fan, I go back to my “basic” habits (and usually bump back to maintenance calories too) and just try to get through whatever’s going on, remembering that my real goal in life is to maintain whatever weight I’ve lost, to not regain.

“Motivation” isn’t something you should need. If it’s something you’re searching for, it’s a sign that your plan isn’t set up right for you. Maybe your deficit is too steep. Maybe you have an erroneous idea that some foods are bad or off limits, or your diet is too restrictive in another way. Maybe you’re trying to start too many habits at once. Maybe you just need to adjust your mindset in another way. Regardless, “motivation” is fleeting and won’t carry you through any type of tough time or stress; you can’t set up a sustainable plan based upon such a flimsy foundation.

The great thing about habit-based weight loss is that you can choose to add-in and adjust habits as you go along. Start slow and grow as they seem easy. Pare back, but don’t quit altogether, if things seem to be too hard. If you hit a plateau, or just want to ramp up the speed of loss, you can choose to level up your game a notch or two. If you get sick of it all and want a break, you can choose to scale back to the minimums you need for maintenance. These choices are conscious. You’re fully in charge.

Making your goals based upon your habits gives you something you can actually control the outcomes of, too. You can control “I’ll log 95% of my meals this week.” You can’t control “I’ll lose 3 pounds this week.” You cannot control the scale, you’ll drive yourself nuts trying to for any length of time. Plus, once you hit maintenance (the real goal, right?) the scale is no longer as much of outcome goal, not one that you’ll get a boost from. “Yay! I still weigh 158!!” Doesnt give the same boost as losing. So, training yourself to focus on habit-based goals now is a long-term advantage.

So this happened at lunch. Along with a beef taco salad. And I STILL come in with 200 calories to spare and thats after logging my estimated dinner. My diary is open, as promised.

And I lost 1.5 pounds this past week. 6 pounds over the past month.

SO.... you most certainly CAN eat out and drink (in moderation), and eat chocolate and carbs (those I do every day) and still lose weight and/or maintain.

I'm about six months in and down just over 50 pounds. (Halfway there!) There are always those times where it feels like I'm not moving forward and the scale bounces around. It gets frustrating.

What's worked for me is:

Logging every day - Whether I'm under my calorie goal or not, I try to be as honest as I can. I err on the side of higher calorie entries if I can't figure out the right one. I love hamburgers, so I build them into my eating plan.

Weighing every day - Even when the scale says I gained weight after I had a big meal. What's important to me is am I losing overall. What's amazing about MFP is that with every entry, we are creating a historical record that we can look back on to study when things were going well and when we've struggled. There is so much information at our fingertips.

Reading the forums - There is so much knowledge and experience here from people who are and have traveled this journey. Everyone's path is a little different and mine will be my own. There is not one way. We each need to decide what works for us. Our bodies react differently to certain foods, exercise, etc.

Trusting the process - In the past when I've been frustrated, I quit. This time, if I'm stuck, I just trust if I keep going and double check that I'm logging accurately, the weight will come off.

Exercise - Exercise started with just earning extra calories so I could eat a little more above my calorie goals. I wanted to try to find an exercise I enjoyed, so I scheduled a private swim lesson just to make sure I understood how to do the different strokes, primarily freestyle and breaststroke, and then started going to the pool. Now I'm hooked. I can track my lap times, etc. on my Apple Watch and can see the progress. My speed has increased, I can do freestyle for a longer period without stopping. It's a competition with myself. My sister and I also hike once a week and that has drastically improved as my fitness level has increased. I don't worry about how I look, I'm just proud of myself for getting out there...even in a swimsuit.

Get the crap out of the house - If the food is in my house, I'll eat it. If I want dessert, I really think about what I want and go buy one serving. Last week it was carrot cake. I know where I can get the best carrot cake and I spend extra money to make sure that if I eat those calories, it's to die for!! I have it easier than most people. It's just me and my critters here at the house, so I don't need to have extra food choices.

Progress photos - My sister and I take progress photos every week when we hike. Sometimes I can't see any difference, other times, I'm amazed. I also measure myself every few weeks. I'm not very good at measuring the same places, but overall I'm seeing a loss.

You can do this! Just stay focused and it will come. I've also joined several challenges where I report daily or weekly. This community is awesome. You will find some fabulous new friends here with the added support that comes with it and information that will be priceless in your journey. And...as you've already seen, you can ask for help and our fellow MFPers will step up to the plate sharing what worked for them. You are almost guaranteed to find valuable nuggets of information that will keep you inspired.