Struggling to stay on track help

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DeButterflyx
DeButterflyx Posts: 41 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
Hi just looking for some advice. I seem to have lost my mojo. I'm caught in a cycle of starting my day out well and in the evening just finding junk and unhealthy quick foods to relax when kids are gone to bed.

I think the whole issue is my thoughts. Iv been doing slimming world, intuitive eating and calorie counting on and off. My head feels muddled and a big issue is I keep questioning is what I'm doing healthy/sustainable and will it work or will I always just feel hungry/unsatisfied.

Is calorie counting a healthy and sustainable way to loose weight? Do people keep off the weight and not feel restricted?

Replies

  • alung2k3
    alung2k3 Posts: 81 Member
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    I can understand why your head/motivation would be jumbled up for sure.

    For me, calorie counting is the best way I have managed to lose weight. I lost just over 5st the last time I did it. My only focus was each day I stayed under or as close to my calorie goal. Having those treats is perfectly acceptable too BTW as long as it fits in your allowance.

    Food wise, some people find certain food types help stop hunger more than others, protein for example. For me along as I had something for my mind to do it would distract me from those urges. Drink lots of water too.

    What's good about counting also is that when you do reach your goal, most foods I now know what the average calorie content is already without looking it up.
  • FoxySprinkles
    FoxySprinkles Posts: 32 Member
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    Try to do things just for today. Be healthy for today.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,015 Member
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    I lost 80 pounds over 13 years ago just by counting calories and reading these forums and doing a little nutrition research and making almost all my own meals. I've maintained that weight loss by being mindful of how much I eat every day.
    It doesn't come naturally to me. I'd rather have three bowls of ice cream every night after dinner but instead I have popcorn or yogurt with fruit or some granola.
    It just takes doing it and creating new habits, new discipline, some exercise, and consistency over time.
    I had to change almost everything about the way I ate previously and the way I thought about food. It was and is worth it to me. You will have to make changes too if you want to change your weight management from now on.
    Decide which ones you're willing to do today and do those. Then make more changes as you go. It gets easier.
  • YolliB2014
    YolliB2014 Posts: 104 Member
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    Totally agree with above posters, not all things work for all people. Sounds like you need to give yourself a little bit of room and let your mind settle a bit.
    In the past I would binge and restrict continually, for many years actually and it started exactly as you describe your day currently. I did have to stop all the dieting and stop all the pre made plans because I realized, to be successful, I had to ensure I ate at a calorie deficit but mine had to be a small deficit in order to incorporate the foods I enjoyed to feel satisfied - not stuffed- after each meal. This helped me easily avoid the afternoon binges.
    I do calorie count now with the plan of losing 1/2 a pound a week, eating as close to the calorie allotment I have each day without digging too much into my exercise cals too much. This has been working.
    As with intuitive eating, which you are familiar with. If your body is asking for food, definitely feed it or face the possibility of finally giving in and lose it… trust me, when the hunger hormones get involved - you don’t stand a chance. Be kind to your body.
    Weight loss is absolutely possible to do without breaking and/or depriving yourself to no end. Be gentle, feed yourself properly and stay in a nice comfortable deficit and see if that works and if not go from there.
    This is what is keeping me going through calorie counting and avoiding the 1000 calorie night time binges.
  • YolliB2014
    YolliB2014 Posts: 104 Member
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    It really is amazing how enjoying your meal and filling up a little more then, than cutting back a little too much and fighting that hunger later on. I’m really happy with how it’s going too!
    We’ll get there 😊
  • DeButterflyx
    DeButterflyx Posts: 41 Member
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    YolliB2014 wrote: »
    It really is amazing how enjoying your meal and filling up a little more then, than cutting back a little too much and fighting that hunger later on. I’m really happy with how it’s going too!
    We’ll get there 😊

    Exactly am down 2lbs this morning so the 77 over didn't do any harm it seems :)
  • DeButterflyx
    DeButterflyx Posts: 41 Member
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    Lietchi wrote: »
    DeButterflyx wrote: »
    YolliB2014 wrote: »
    It really is amazing how enjoying your meal and filling up a little more then, than cutting back a little too much and fighting that hunger later on. I’m really happy with how it’s going too!
    We’ll get there 😊

    Exactly am down 2lbs this morning so the 77 over didn't do any harm it seems :)

    I would just like to mention you cannot judge one day by your weigh-in the next day.

    77 calories is the equivalent of 0.022lbs of bodyfat. Our bodyweight fluctuates more than that daily because of shifts in our water weight, food waste in our system,...

    I'm not saying this to discourage you, I just think it's important for successful weight loss to understand that it's the long-term weight trend that matters (at least one month/menstrual cycle). We see so many people here obsessing over short term weigh-ins, who sabotage themselves because of it, by switching strategies way too quickly, giving up because they think 'it' s not working',...

    It's even more important in the context of aiming for a slower rate of loss, since it will take a bit more time to see the downward trend and there might be days and weeks where you seem to be heading in the wrong direction. Just be patient and try to trust the process 🙂 A weight trending app like Libra or Happyscale could be useful too.

    Is it OK to go over slightly then if needed? 🤔 I have been up all week and suddenly was down 2.5lbs before calorie counting when I actually stick to it at all does seem to have fast effects for me but I do get where your coming from
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 32,429 Member
    edited March 2022
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    DeButterflyx wrote: »
    Lietchi wrote: »
    DeButterflyx wrote: »
    YolliB2014 wrote: »
    It really is amazing how enjoying your meal and filling up a little more then, than cutting back a little too much and fighting that hunger later on. I’m really happy with how it’s going too!
    We’ll get there 😊

    Exactly am down 2lbs this morning so the 77 over didn't do any harm it seems :)

    I would just like to mention you cannot judge one day by your weigh-in the next day.

    77 calories is the equivalent of 0.022lbs of bodyfat. Our bodyweight fluctuates more than that daily because of shifts in our water weight, food waste in our system,...

    I'm not saying this to discourage you, I just think it's important for successful weight loss to understand that it's the long-term weight trend that matters (at least one month/menstrual cycle). We see so many people here obsessing over short term weigh-ins, who sabotage themselves because of it, by switching strategies way too quickly, giving up because they think 'it' s not working',...

    It's even more important in the context of aiming for a slower rate of loss, since it will take a bit more time to see the downward trend and there might be days and weeks where you seem to be heading in the wrong direction. Just be patient and try to trust the process 🙂 A weight trending app like Libra or Happyscale could be useful too.

    Is it OK to go over slightly then if needed? 🤔 I have been up all week and suddenly was down 2.5lbs before calorie counting when I actually stick to it at all does seem to have fast effects for me but I do get where your coming from

    It's a rough approximation, but a person would need to go approximately 3500 calories over their current weight-maintenance calories (not just over their weight loss calorie goal) to gain a pound of fat. Now, that excess might be a cumulative thing over months/years in tiny bits, but if you got your calorie goal with a weight-loss rate in your set-up, your calorie goal already includes a deficit (a certain number of calories subtracted to put your goal below estimated weight-maintenance calories).

    If you're trying to lose a pound a week (and aren't trying to be so aggressive you hit MFP's minimum for women), it would be suggesting you eat 500 calories lower than your weight maintenance calories, as your daily goal. (Half a pound a week, 250 calories below; two pounds, 1000 calories below, etc.)

    In that context, eating 77 calories above your MFP goal means you're still going to lose weight. Since 77 calories (by itself) is 0.022 pounds of body fat, eating those 77 calories implies that you'll reach goal weight . . . a few minutes later on the same day you would've gotten there without those 77 calories. Big (bleep) deal (not).

    Further, if eating that bit extra keeps you on a sensible losing-weight path, vs. hunger/cravings making you fail out, or undereating making you burn fewer calories than expected because you're tired . . . you will actual get to goal weight faster in real life, by avoiding over-eating due to cravings, giving up entirely, resting so much your daily life steps or whatever go way down, etc.

    It might be a good thing to try, to go to your MFP profile and temporarily change your goal to "maintain weight", see how many calories it gives you. (Keep in mind that's for your current weight, the number will slowly drop as you get lighter, because it takes fewer calories to move a smaller body through the world, assuming nothing else changes.) (ETA: Once you see that number, note it, and change your profile back the way it was. If you've lost weight since you first set it up, your calorie goal might go down a tiny bit, but it shouldn't be a big drop unless you've lost many tens of pounds since you set it.)

    When you have an estimate of your maintenance calories, you know that any day you eat a significant chunk less than that, you're losing fat. It's fine if it's a little slower loss some days, a little faster than others, if the helps you stay the course. Continuity, steady loss - that will get you to goal. Super aggressive loss, with slips and setbacks, may be less effective . . . and it makes some people give up altogether because it seems hard and not worth it.

    If you see a fast loss immediately after eating a bit more . . . it may be useful to know that stress causes water retention, and if eating a little more helps reduce the physical stress on your body, and the psychological stress on your mind . . . you can see your body let go of some water weight, and maybe think it's instant fat loss, when it isn't.

    Fat loss is slow, gradual - compared to water weight and digestive contents changes. Fat loss is the part most of us care about. It plays peek-a-boo on the scale with water and digestive contents on their way to becoming waste. Don't let that mess with your head. It's the trend that matters. If you're an adult woman, not in menopause yet, comparing your body weight at the same relative point in at least two different menstrual cycles may be one of the better ways to see your trends.

    One aside: MFP is giving you a calorie estimate. The implication is that if you're non-average in some significant way, its estimate could be inaccurate. Most people are pretty average, so MFP estimates are pretty close. That's not a thing to worry about unless/until you have many weeks of logging data and weight-change data that suggests you're non-average. Even then, you could adjust calorie goal, and accomplish weight loss as expected, based on those revised expectations. Even then, also, our individual calorie intake logging is more likely a source of error than the basic calorie estimates from MFP. Both are possible, but all of us have some logging oopsies, and most of us are average.

    Best wishes!
  • DeButterflyx
    DeButterflyx Posts: 41 Member
    Options
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    DeButterflyx wrote: »
    Lietchi wrote: »
    DeButterflyx wrote: »
    YolliB2014 wrote: »
    It really is amazing how enjoying your meal and filling up a little more then, than cutting back a little too much and fighting that hunger later on. I’m really happy with how it’s going too!
    We’ll get there 😊

    Exactly am down 2lbs this morning so the 77 over didn't do any harm it seems :)

    I would just like to mention you cannot judge one day by your weigh-in the next day.

    77 calories is the equivalent of 0.022lbs of bodyfat. Our bodyweight fluctuates more than that daily because of shifts in our water weight, food waste in our system,...

    I'm not saying this to discourage you, I just think it's important for successful weight loss to understand that it's the long-term weight trend that matters (at least one month/menstrual cycle). We see so many people here obsessing over short term weigh-ins, who sabotage themselves because of it, by switching strategies way too quickly, giving up because they think 'it' s not working',...

    It's even more important in the context of aiming for a slower rate of loss, since it will take a bit more time to see the downward trend and there might be days and weeks where you seem to be heading in the wrong direction. Just be patient and try to trust the process 🙂 A weight trending app like Libra or Happyscale could be useful too.

    Is it OK to go over slightly then if needed? 🤔 I have been up all week and suddenly was down 2.5lbs before calorie counting when I actually stick to it at all does seem to have fast effects for me but I do get where your coming from

    It's a rough approximation, but a person would need to go approximately 3500 calories over their current weight-maintenance calories (not just over their weight loss calorie goal) to gain a pound of fat. Now, that excess might be a cumulative thing over months/years in tiny bits, but if you got your calorie goal with a weight-loss rate in your set-up, your calorie goal already includes a deficit (a certain number of calories subtracted to put your goal below estimated weight-maintenance calories).

    If you're trying to lose a pound a week (and aren't trying to be so aggressive you hit MFP's minimum for women), it would be suggesting you eat 500 calories lower than your weight maintenance calories, as your daily goal. (Half a pound a week, 250 calories below; two pounds, 1000 calories below, etc.)

    In that context, eating 77 calories above your MFP goal means you're still going to lose weight. Since 77 calories (by itself) is 0.022 pounds of body fat, eating those 77 calories implies that you'll reach goal weight . . . a few minutes later on the same day you would've gotten there without those 77 calories. Big (bleep) deal (not).

    Further, if eating that bit extra keeps you on a sensible losing-weight path, vs. hunger/cravings making you fail out, or undereating making you burn fewer calories than expected because you're tired . . . you will actual get to goal weight faster in real life, by avoiding over-eating due to cravings, giving up entirely, resting so much your daily life steps or whatever go way down, etc.

    It might be a good thing to try, to go to your MFP profile and temporarily change your goal to "maintain weight", see how many calories it gives you. (Keep in mind that's for your current weight, the number will slowly drop as you get lighter, because it takes fewer calories to move a smaller body through the world, assuming nothing else changes.) (ETA: Once you see that number, note it, and change your profile back the way it was. If you've lost weight since you first set it up, your calorie goal might go down a tiny bit, but it shouldn't be a big drop unless you've lost many tens of pounds since you set it.)

    When you have an estimate of your maintenance calories, you know that any day you eat a significant chunk less than that, you're losing fat. It's fine if it's a little slower loss some days, a little faster than others, if the helps you stay the course. Continuity, steady loss - that will get you to goal. Super aggressive loss, with slips and setbacks, may be less effective . . . and it makes some people give up altogether because it seems hard and not worth it.

    If you see a fast loss immediately after eating a bit more . . . it may be useful to know that stress causes water retention, and if eating a little more helps reduce the physical stress on your body, and the psychological stress on your mind . . . you can see your body let go of some water weight, and maybe think it's instant fat loss, when it isn't.

    Fat loss is slow, gradual - compared to water weight and digestive contents changes. Fat loss is the part most of us care about. It plays peek-a-boo on the scale with water and digestive contents on their way to becoming waste. Don't let that mess with your head. It's the trend that matters. If you're an adult woman, not in menopause yet, comparing your body weight at the same relative point in at least two different menstrual cycles may be one of the better ways to see your trends.

    One aside: MFP is giving you a calorie estimate. The implication is that if you're non-average in some significant way, its estimate could be inaccurate. Most people are pretty average, so MFP estimates are pretty close. That's not a thing to worry about unless/until you have many weeks of logging data and weight-change data that suggests you're non-average. Even then, you could adjust calorie goal, and accomplish weight loss as expected, based on those revised expectations. Even then, also, our individual calorie intake logging is more likely a source of error than the basic calorie estimates from MFP. Both are possible, but all of us have some logging oopsies, and most of us are average.

    Best wishes!

    Thanks that's very interesting!
    Thank you
  • YolliB2014
    YolliB2014 Posts: 104 Member
    Options
    DeButterflyx wrote: »
    YolliB2014 wrote: »
    It really is amazing how enjoying your meal and filling up a little more then, than cutting back a little too much and fighting that hunger later on. I’m really happy with how it’s going too!
    We’ll get there 😊

    Exactly am down 2lbs this morning so the 77 over didn't do any harm it seems :)

    Awesome 😊

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