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Does your doctor comment on your weight?
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No, my doctor never mentioned how much weight I had gained over the years. Now, being diagnosed as diabetic, it makes me angry. When my annual A1C results were 8.5, she said unfortunately now you will always be diabetic. Then followed up with would you like to lose weight? It would have been good to know before I passed the point of no return. I would rather you hurt my little feelings and save my life! So I jumped right on the path and have lost 47 pounds in less than 8 months, my A1C is 5.6, I exercise every day and haven't felt this well in 7 years. And best of all, no diabetes meds; cut my blood pressure meds in half and may end up off them altogether. So yes, doctors should say something about weight!13
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myfurturelooksgood wrote: »No, my doctor never mentioned how much weight I had gained over the years. Now, being diagnosed as diabetic, it makes me angry. When my annual A1C results were 8.5, she said unfortunately now you will always be diabetic. Then followed up with would you like to lose weight? It would have been good to know before I passed the point of no return. I would rather you hurt my little feelings and save my life! So I jumped right on the path and have lost 47 pounds in less than 8 months, my A1C is 5.6, I exercise every day and haven't felt this well in 7 years. And best of all, no diabetes meds; cut my blood pressure meds in half and may end up off them altogether. So yes, doctors should say something about weight!
I can't believe that any doctor told you that you would always be diabetic. That is just untrue. In fact the research shows that MOST diabetics will no longer be diabetic if they can get into the desirable weight range and stay there. I have known many who have seen dramatic improvements with weight lost and improved diet even if they remain above "optimal" weight.
I do think there is a bit of a quandry about whether to try weight loss first or whether/when to start the meds right away and then see if you can wean off once weight loss is achieved or sustained.
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myfurturelooksgood wrote: »No, my doctor never mentioned how much weight I had gained over the years. Now, being diagnosed as diabetic, it makes me angry. When my annual A1C results were 8.5, she said unfortunately now you will always be diabetic. Then followed up with would you like to lose weight? It would have been good to know before I passed the point of no return. I would rather you hurt my little feelings and save my life! So I jumped right on the path and have lost 47 pounds in less than 8 months, my A1C is 5.6, I exercise every day and haven't felt this well in 7 years. And best of all, no diabetes meds; cut my blood pressure meds in half and may end up off them altogether. So yes, doctors should say something about weight!
I can't believe that any doctor told you that you would always be diabetic. That is just untrue. In fact the research shows that MOST diabetics will no longer be diabetic if they can get into the desirable weight range and stay there. I have known many who have seen dramatic improvements with weight lost and improved diet even if they remain above "optimal" weight.
I do think there is a bit of a quandry about whether to try weight loss first or whether/when to start the meds right away and then see if you can wean off once weight loss is achieved or sustained.
This isn’t valid. Many diabetics can achieve normal blood glucose range with diet weight loss, but they will never recover the ability to consume large amounts of carbs without a blood sugar spike. The initial insulin response which keeps sugar level is usually gone and stays gone.4 -
Yes exactly.
Unless it is gestational diabetes - yes you are always going to be diabetic.
You can sometimes lose weight such that you need less or no medication and can control your blood sugar levels on diet alone - but that isnt becoming non diabetic.
It is becoming diet control only.2 -
By no means am I am overly knowledgeable about this, but I do believe that if you have/had gestational diabetes, you have a higher probability of developing T2 diabetes later in life. Meaning, although you may no longer have diabetes following the birth, you will need to be aware of needed behaviors/monitoring to ensure it does not come back.0
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My doctors have not brought it up but when I ask if it would help they have all said a resounding “yes”. I know they run a business so I’m okay that I have to ask to get an answer but they should tell everyone these things regardless of what the reaction would be if they have an illness, disease or physical complications that could be made better or resolved by losing weight. As long as they say it respectfully, it’s not personal, it’s their job to help you get better.3
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I often thought about this. I have been as low as 103 and as high as 205 as an adult and never had a medical professional say anything to me ever.2
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My gp’s (primary care doctors) have commented on my weight loss and asked how I’ve accomplished it and maintain it knowing I’m not able to exercise. They never had any comments or possible solutions when I broached my medical conditions and the subsequent weight gain it all causes.1
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Theoldguy1 wrote: »A coworker of mine is 5'7 260lbs, her doctor told him that his healthy weight is 200. We're talking about a dude who doesn't workout.
I don't know if she said that to give him a reasonable goal or she really thinks 200lbs is his healthy weight. Maybe she doesn't think he can lose the weight. Who knows.
Now the guy thinks he is large framed and that 200 is what he should shoot for.
Just an anecdote.
Just for reference this guy is a couple inches taller at 5'9" and a bit heavier than your co-worker's goal of 200 pounds at 208. If the co-worker gets to 200 and and looks like this he's probably okay. If not, he still has some work to do.
That's an elite level physique. The number of 5' 7" dudes walking around at 200 lbs and a healthy body fat % is extraordinarily low.1 -
I am not obese but overweight BMI 26ish. The only doctor who commented on it was just being a lazy and quite frankly bad doctor. She didn't want to deal with me because it was the end of the day and she obviously wanted to go home so tried to fob me off by blaming my symptoms on my weight. I ended up having surgery to fix my complaint that was something that was completely unrelated to weight. I wasn't offended I was cranky at receiving substandard care. As it was public health I had to make an official complaint to get seen by another specialist who listened to my symptoms, actually answered my questions then suggested a real treatment plan.6
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One doctor once made very rude comments about my higher weight at the time (185-190 at 5’7”) which was very triggering because my chart clearly states I have past ED issues. My husband worships this doctor and I think she is a heartless b?$!h. I’m pretty small now and wonder if she’d ask about my lower weight with the same lack of sensitivity. Hmm3
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I went to my regular GP 2 weeks ago for a routine check-up. I don't think I've seen her for probably 6 years. 6 years ago she said (gently) about watching my weight as it related to a slightly elevated blood pressure. This time she remarked that I had lost weight and asked if it was intentional. She also asked what I did to lose the weight. In both instances, I was happy with the interaction and the conversation around weight.6
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Interesting question:
I had a long time GP that has since retired and he would only ask…”are you exercising”. After he retired, my new doctor was very different. She said I needed to lose weight and asked if I needed to make monthly appointments to check in with her for me to stay focused. She actually suggested or maybe I should say she mentioned that many people in her office were doing keto. I took the hint, researched and did keto for about 3 months and lost 15lbs that I kept off until my job changed to a very sedentary one. She left the practice.
My current doctor (have only seen her once) didn’t really address it, that I recall. My current plan should have me down about 40 to 50 pounds by the time I see her next so it will be interesting to see what she has to say.
Offended – no – It’s not like I didn’t know.
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My previous GP (now retired) didn't ever say much, possibly as he is excessively over weight himself and struggles with it, but was always open to talk if I wanted to.
New GP (one telephone appointment in 2 years with blood test results, never met him) very hot on it - most likely because in the UK, big government push to tackle obesity - so now I've been offered help via app/on-line. Everything is Dr. Google.
Be nice if physical restrictions (as with many, I have arthritis and a back problem, so exercise just plain hurts) were taken into account when GP tells you to exercise more but not prepared to offer guidance so you don't do further damage.
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My doctor joked with me about being obese once. Im 5'8" and, at the time, I was 195lb with 12% body fat. I ran marathons and weight trained.
Now I'm 190 lb with 27% body fat and I'm getting back into weight training, no running. My doctor is working closely with me on that and has only talk to me about it because I asked her opinion on it.
A doctor should be interested in your health and if telling you that you need to lose weight to be healthy makes you offended then you have more issues to unpack then of the reality check that they gave you6 -
Tweaking_Time wrote: »being a doctor is a business
That to me is so wrong. so your care as a doctor is based on profits rather than patient care?
But on the other side, people who get offended at a doctor commenting on your weight, why are you even going to a doctor in the first place.
If I took my car to a mechanic, I wouldn't be offended if they talked about a massive rust patch they found and what is needed to fix it. Listen to the experts.
Doctors should bring up your weight, especially if it is a large issue or causing other issues. They are doing it to help you, not shame you or humiliate or offend you.
If you get offended and change doctors, finding one that ignores your weight, just seems like denial or fear.
I have seen around 5+ doctors and several nurses over the last few months, they basically all brought up my weight, cause its an issue that I need to fix. I was at no point offended, cause what does that achieve, not going to help me lose weight.9 -
One doctor once made very rude comments about my higher weight
obviously you dont need to answer, but are you able to share what the doctor said that was very rude? I am just curious as to what these doctors are saying that offend people.
For me they always seem to be pretty kind but to the point, like not beating around the bush.
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Yes, when the blood work shows borderline high cholesterol, pre-diabetes and such, my PCP would make mention of it in passing. My PCP has recently retired. The new one I seen specifically said I should try losing a pound a week. It wasn't said in offensive matter just one of those "low laying fruit" advice.
Now the PCP my mother sees. I don't know what he says to her but there must be quite a lot of fat shaming. If she has put on some weight before the appointment she would deliberately change the appointment to a few weeks later to try to deal with the gain. She has a host of health problems. Impressing the doctor shouldn't be one of them.4 -
My doctor doesn’t comment nor do the PA and NP. I wish they would. I had to get them to agree with me that a BP medicine was needed.3
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One doctor once made very rude comments about my higher weight
obviously you dont need to answer, but are you able to share what the doctor said that was very rude? I am just curious as to what these doctors are saying that offend people.
For me they always seem to be pretty kind but to the point, like not beating around the bush.
Maybe it was more of a tone or look than words. I mean they should say something if you have a higher than normal BMI. This particular doctor never said a word about weight to my overweight husband so I was not expecting her to make an issue of my weight and her perceived lack of exercise she thought I did. I am a distance runner and as I said also have had ED issues which are in my chart so I was surprised that she hadn’t appeared to have read my chart before even starting to have any conversation. I wasn’t there to discuss weight issues but like an ear infection or something random. I will not see that doctor again because I think she didn’t treat me respectfully or pay attention to me and why I was seeing her but paid attention to what she wanted to.
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papercut2k wrote: »Now the PCP my mother sees. I don't know what he says to her but there must be quite a lot of fat shaming. If she has put on some weight before the appointment she would deliberately change the appointment to a few weeks later to try to deal with the gain. She has a host of health problems. Impressing the doctor shouldn't be one of them.
Some people are like this even without fat shaming. I know people who are. I used to be (I wasn't in denial about being overweight and overweight being unhealthy, but I was uncomfortable talking about it since I was so wrapped up in shame about it).2 -
Does anyone else have a problem with a doctor addressing weight and nothing else? I have been to several different doctors who, after explaining why I was there, would start out with "ok, but what are you doing to lose weight?" Like, what does that have to do with (insert non-weight related issue here)? I could understand if i was being seen for bad knees or hips, but not things like ear aches. For example, last year I went to the ER because I thought I was having a heart attack. I was released with an appointment for a covid test and a diagnosis of "obesity ". I turned to the back of my discharge papers and found out my blood pressure, glucose, hemoglobin, vitamin d, potassium, magnesium and creatnin were all low.
I was just wondering if it happens a lot.1 -
Big trigger warning:
I had A LOT of comments on my weight from doctors and others growing up. I've always been overweight but before adulthood never more than a few kilograms and never obese. Yet I was constantly told to diet and exercise more. It destroyed my confidence, to the point I thought I was good for nothing and wondered why I existed at all. And it destroyed my relationship with food. Teenage me never stood a chance.
After years (literally some of my first memories are related to dieting and guilt over eating) of dieting and stressing and never losing any weight, I decided as an adult that enough was enough. My early adulthood coincided with the rise of the body positivity movement and they helped. At first it was puzzling that women who weighed over 100kg could love themselves fully. Or that they didn't consider 'fat' an insult. I couldn't wrap my mind around it at all.
Fast forward to 2017 and I was failing school, no longer being able to rely on my intelligence alone to ace things, and in that winter I hit my lowest point. I was quite suicidal and saw no way forward. My GP was extremely dismissive so I decided it was up to me to do something, whether that was ending it all or finding a way out. This coincided with the suicide of a celebrity I liked at age 27 so I made myself a 5 year plan (I was 22 at the time) to try for 5 more years to hang on and hopefully change things for the better and if I gave it my all and still felt like nothing was worth it then that would be that. Remember, I had no support system I felt I could rely on at this time. Looking back, this deal with myself seems insane.
So I worked on my mental health issues, including body image issues, with all the psychology knowledgeI had and any online resources I could find. And in 2020, in the middle of the pandemic, I found myself walking to a colleague's house when some random dude I didn't know yelled fat whale at me. And I felt nothing. It didn't hit me at first, I was busy feelimg sorry for him for leading such a pathetic life but about 100m on it hit me: I didn't feel bad about being called fat or a whale. Because I didn't see myself as a whale. And fat had become just a descriptor, no longer an insult, to me.
The craziest thing? Once the stress of dieting and being made to feel insecure lessened, I actually started losing weight? Removing stress allowed me todo what all those years of dieting had promised to do but failed to deliver on.
My relationship with food is now a good one. But not thanks to any of my doctors or any of my friends, teachers, coaches or family members growing up. I have one extremely fatphobic aunt who actually tried to force me to undereat by a lot (about 1400 calories when my BMR was 2200 and my TDEE around 3000) but even she couldn't impact my way of eating. And I did that all by myself, with special thanks to any body positivity influencers I accidentally came across.
So you might be thinking no harm no foul, right? I'm fine now? I thought that for a bit but no, actually. I feel like my confidence is great because it's so much better than it used to be. But the feedback I keep getting at work (where I feel extremely incompetent and like a fraud) is that I should be more confident. My insecurity is holding me back. I don't think I deserve to be proud of my accomplishments, I don't recognise flirting ever because even though it looks exactly like flirting when it's directed at other people, my mind cannot comprehend it being directed at me because I'm not worthy of being flirted with even by senior citizens, it's hard to recognise sexual harrassment because part of me still feels like I should be grateful to be getting any "positive" attention at all ("positive" meaning not being treated with utter contempt, regardless of how dirty and used the attention makes me feel).
I am still extremely messed up from all the people calling me fat, implying useless, and starting at such a young age. So sure, for some people it might be okay if their doctors give them a reality check with regards to their weight. But guess what? A lot of fat people are very much aware of how fat they are. And yet another person mentioning it might just be the one thing to push them over the edge.
I'll keep working on my confidence but I don't know if my faith in doctors can even be restored. Only time will tell, I suppose.
Btw, I turn 27 in november this year. I'm no longer miserable all the time and have a much rosier outlook on life now.16 -
bojaantje3822 wrote: »Big trigger warning...
Btw, I turn 27 in november this year. I'm no longer miserable all the time and have a much rosier outlook on life now.
I just wanted to say, wow that's a lot & thank you for sharing. I hate that you had such a horrible time & that you had to deal with on your own, without any support. Glad you made it through to the other side though!
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I see a Rheumatologist every 6 months for gout management. I just went a couple of weeks ago and he commented that my blood pressure was up and my blood work was a little off and that I had put on about 10 Lbs since I last saw him and about 20 Lbs since the first time I saw him in the summer of 2020. He commented that I should get back to doing whatever I was doing when he first saw me because other than the gout all of my other health indicators were optimal and now they're steadily slipping.
Doesn't bother me and I'm well aware that I put on 20 Lbs with COVID stuff. None of it had anything to do with why I see him, but he's still a Dr. and concerned with my overall health.4 -
Always, it’s the next level … first they blame everything on smoking so you stop smoking then they blame everything on your being over weight then it’s ‘your over 40…’ months m sure the last one will be you’re 100 how are you not dead yet 🥴
I’m not offended it’s just annoying 🙄0 -
Always, it’s the next level … first they blame everything on smoking so you stop smoking then they blame everything on your being over weight then it’s ‘your over 40…’ months m sure the last one will be you’re 100 how are you not dead yet 🥴
I’m not offended it’s just annoying 🙄
that seems an odd thing to be annoyed about.
Reality is that health risks do increase with smoking, obesity and age.
So, makes sense to not smoke and keep weight at a healthy level - and of course since your doctor is about health, they should not be ignoring this.
Of course you cant do anything about your age - but you can undertake health screening relevant to your age group - eg mammograms, FOBT, PSA etc from the recomended age - so of course your doctor should tell you this.
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I get comments a lot from my gastro assistant and orthopedic doctors. They told me they wouldn’t do knee replacements until I lost weight. This was years up to 2001 so had the gastric Bypass lost enough to have both knees replaced. I had the right replaced in 2002 and the left in 2003. Then over the years I gained back several times to might highest weight ever of 310 pounds. You can eat around the surgery. I hate eating meat with gastric bypass because all it does is make throw up so I would eat easier foods that didn’t make me sick but got weight gain. That leads me up to 2019 my new orthopedic doctor wouldn’t convert my partial knee replacement to a total knee replacement until I went from 265 to 225 pounds. I did way better than he expected and got down to around 215 pounds. So he was going to do the surgery but first I had to get a heart check up. Then guess what bring on covid pandemic and lockdowns where I gained back weight over two years to 295 pounds and my orthopedic surgeon moved on. Now I am at around 270 after restarting here.
Do I like doctors comments no. A lot of them were down right hostile not this orthopedic surgeon but the one I previously had was and my gastric guy is insulting. I have been losing inches but scale has been stuck. Not only that they set the scales to weigh you 5 or 10 pounds heavier. I told him that. His response well walking is good but you need to watch your diet. Well duh. I have lost thousands of pounds over the years and am watching my diet, tracking food and walking 10,000 steps or more most days. I can’t make the scale move. My cardiac doctor well if you lost weight your fast heart rate would go away. I don’t think so. I have been fat all my life and it only started about three years ago. My gastro assistant guy again well if you lost weight you wouldn’t have gerd or acid reflux. Uh I had less reflux before I had the gastric bypass, no history of ulcers and no Barrett’s. Now I have all three.
Am I sensitive about weight yes when I have been bullied, shamed, bashed, cut down etc for it my whole life by even a couple family members one being my own father and brother. It doesn’t help having a skinny sister who I would get compared to and two skinny brothers. My oldest brother and I are the only two who struggle with weight.
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Not only that they set the scales to weigh you 5 or 10 pounds heavier.
I doubt that.
Certainly not the case wherever I have worked in Dr's surgeries.3 -
It took me years to find a doctor who was actually concerned about me being underweight, even though I was concerned about it myself, and worried by the fact that almost everything I ate seemed to give me some kind of GI symptoms. Other doctors I’ve had in the past just asked, “Have you always been fairly skinny?” (Yes) “Do you have any history of eating disorders?” (No). “Well just eat more. And don’t be so stressed out”. (So you’re not helping me and you expect that to make me less stressed?) And that was that.
Several months after my PCP finally referred me to a GI specialist, turns out I have IBS and another underlying condition that makes it harder for my intestines to absorb nutrients. I’ve been working with a nutritionist lately to and things are starting to change a little bit. I still have a very long way to go, but I have hope for the first time in a long time. And it feels better that my symptoms weren’t all in my head, like I’d been thinking for years after so many doctors being dismissive.11
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