Is it easier to stay on your goal mission with friends help?

I'm also on this only for tracking my calories and for the community challenges and questions I might have that are already answered in the forums. It's nice to see others progress. But Can't rely on other people to stay motivated. Some days you aren't going to be motivated at all, only consistency and making something a habit will help. No amount of others cheering you on can make you do anything if you can't be bothered to change things and work on yourself.
I do like seeing people support each other through the journey though, makes it seem easier and more fun.

it depends on the person. I'm self-motivated and competitive in general, so I don't need to rely on someone else to help me on fitness.

COGypsy wrote: »

I voted No. Why would my friends care what I eat or whether I worked out or not? I manage my health just fine without a committee.

Exactly. I don't want anyone to question my choices! They're my choices. I don't choose for anyone else! Of course, saying that I gave my 21 year old son a hard time yesterday because at 8:00 at night he had yet to eat a single fruit or vegetable all day! But he's my kid!

It probably depends on the person. IRL I have quite a few friends who are into health and fitness and I find it beneficial to be around like minded people...not so much a motivational thing as it is having people around who you can go on hikes with or group ride with and have a comradery with. It can also be beneficial when I'm training if I have others around me that are also training for an event because we can push each other when we're not feeling it. Having a running buddy or cycling buddy text me and hit me up for a time to go ride or run can help me get off my butt if I'm not really feeling it.

As far as the internet goes, I'm just not all that vested in random internet strangers and having a cheerleader on the other side of a screen doesn't really do anything for me. I have a pretty large friends list, but I very rarely interact on my homepage.

For me? Not exactly. (I didn't vote; I mostly don't like these polls - not nuanced.)

For weight management or fitness (or both) I think it's helpful to have a social context where those are group norms. Most humans are influenced by reference-group norms.

If someone has that social context in real life, that's IMO ideal. If someone doesn't have that IRL, or it's limited, I think something like MFP friendships or participation in the MFP Community can be a slightly-less-effective alternative**. So can relevant groups on other social media, subscribing to relevant e-newsletters, following (sane) diet/fitness experts, joining clubs/groups/gyms with that focus, and that sort of thing.

Personally, while I've found the MFP friend-feed stuff fun at times, I'm more of a Community forum gal, and a sub-par MFP friend. Like others posting on this thread, I think motivation is a solo sport, but I can use groups, threads, challenges, etc., here as part of keeping my head in the game.

At root, it's still about how I foster self-accountability, not about other people holding me accountable or motivating me. That's not their job, it's mine. Personal responsibility is the bedrock. Asking others to make me accountable or motivated, for me, would be disempowering, a shift of my agency on to others so that I might psychologically have someplace else to attribute a lack of success. In reality, my success or lack thereof is entirely about my choices, not others' actions.


** Why less effective? Marshall McLuhan, hot vs. cold media, etc., loosely.

Everything that is difficult is goig to be easier with support. Saying that, you cant always depend on getting the support you need so you have to develop self motivation and perseverance and that comes from within, only you can give you that.

My husband is generous and loves to cook. He makes great meals that are easy for me to hit my goals with. But then at 9 or 10 he'll wander by and hand me a plate of batter fried shrimp (he is having some too and also hands them to my son - it's not a sabotage move). But it's hard for me to say 'thanks, but no'. So, of course, I eat them. Having him on board would make it easier. We did well when we were both doing Whole30.

rosebarnalice wrote: »

I don't put anyone else in the position of being my food cop: the responsibility for my food choices rests entirely on me.

That said, I appreciate my friends who are aware and supportive of my lifestyle--whether actively or passively. Two recent birthday party examples:

• Party 1- Passive: friend cuts cake, and when I decline just moves to the next person without forcing, asking, shaming or otherwise commenting on my choice.
  
• Party 2- Active: friend has a cake and a whole peeled watermelon, and asks guests if they want one or both--knowing full well that I will be sticking to the watermelon.

That's also active I think. It is actively accepting your easy decision. Sadly, this is kind of rare. Just the other day I was enjoying a pint and chatting with a fellow. He offered me some peanuts. I declined. I do like them, but didn't want to get started. He said, "Aw come on, just one." Yep. Starts with just one.

I think he also walked out on his tab....