Body Image

Do you mean you are disconnected from your body? Or are people around you feeling friendly (and I mean, mostly men) and giving you attention so that you become disconnected from your body?

It was that latter phrase for me. I remember when I got down to my recent weight for Xmas, and was all dolled up in my little red dress, make-up, and my bangs (I got them from Amazon). The attention that I got from men -- was zero to 80% after four months of weight loss and fitness. Even my brother-in-law took the time to see ME, as not his sister-in-law (and he liked what he saw.)

I was going from non-interested to interesting in a few short months. I was always myself. I could see the change in people and it's not always favorable.

Look up Body Dysmorphia. That’s when you see your old self in the mirror and can’t “see” the latest version of you.

Many people who lose weight have this issue.

What helped me personally was a trainer who began texting photos of me following every workout, as well as short videos so I could see my technique.

I always avoided photos while obese and while losing weight, because I still saw the same person in the mirror. It wasn’t until these photos started showing up on my phone that I could see the changes. It was absolutely confounding.

I could see it on the phone but it took months longer to see it in the mirror.

Others have reported that taking and comparing regular measurements helps them.

Many people here have shared stories of embarrassing fashion accidents because pants, skirts or drawers fell down, because they were too big but they couldn’t beleive it enough to do something about it. One side of their brain told them “clothes are too big” while the other side told them “the body is still too big”.

Another big shift for me came when packing for a trip, the same trip we’d done exactly a year earlier and 60 pounds (at that time) heavier. My clothes took up half the suitcase space. I found myself holding them up, turning them, marveling at them, and really seeing them for the first time.

Almost five years after starting, I’m embarrassed to admit, but I still peek at my reflection in shop windows to make sure it’s me. I’ll wiggle a finger or pull the dog’s leash to confirm the movement corresponds with that reflection. That’s how much weight loss screws with your head.

Your brain can fool you.

But if you’re in the habit of wearing (sorry) slouchy clothes, I can see how you can’t see the changes.

When I was an XXL, I wore similar clothes and became a master (I thought) at hiding my weight. I suspect you may have fallen in the habit of doing the same.

On the NSV thread you’ll see lots of comments from people joyous “I no longer have to wear tunics!”

Treat yourself to something more fitted and I bet people will notice. And you’ll see it better in the mirror.

Have some confidence in yourself. You’ve dropped a clothing size and are in a good place, so enjoy it.

Caveat, don’t do like me and be so absorbed in seeing changes or getting compliments or even the challenge of it all, that you go too far in the other direction.