gaining a LOT of weight after bereavement

My dad died almost four years ago. I know exactly how you felt and how you feel now. It stills feels like yesterday that he died. I miss him every single day. It feels just like yesterday because I never gave myself a chance to grieve. I instead, smoked marijuana a lot and munched on everything.
It's true that I gained a lot of weight when I had my first child but it was my dad dying that made it impossible for me to change. It felt impossible to me anyways.
Now I am doing this because it's what he would have wanted for me.

Feel free to add me if you like. You can do this!!!

I feel like that too. My Dad died in June and I'm still coming to terms with it. I gained half a stone over the summer, on an already very heavy frame. Add me if you would like some support

I'm tearing up for you, so sorry for your loss. I too am here losing my "sad fat." I had two miscarriages within one year and comforted myself with pizza and vodka. I stopped doing anything that resembled exercise and grieved. Not sure what clicked this year, but I have finally been dropping those pounds, less than 20 more to go to my pre-loss weight.. And as I improve my physical health I am more comfortable talking about my losses and am in a better mental state. It is almost like I am finding myself again. I wish you the best. There will probably be times it is physically and mentally difficult, but remember you are worth the battle.

I did the same thing. I never had trouble with my weight until after...

after what, jg?

Death in immediate family not by natural causes

I did the same thing. I never had trouble with my weight until after...

after what, jg?

Death in immediate family not by natural causes
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so sorry. That will be "very sad fat " indeed

It was my choice to deal with it the way I did, so now I have to fix myself and I've got a lot of work to do.

My mom died last week. I've been having a hard time controlling things already. I at least forced myself to log it the last few days.

My dad passed away last week also. It is definitely hard to control the eating. Right now it's just hard to not eat the bad stuff.

I went through a tough time after my grandmother died Sept. 2010 and after a close friend was killed in a car accident earlier this year.

My dad died when I was 14, exactly 12 years ago tomorrow. I STILL know that I will be in a rough emotional place tomorrow and will probably do some emotional eating - even now, 12 years later. I think it's just something you have to accept and not be angry at yourself for, because when you're angry at yourself, that leads to more destructive behaviors (like wine and emotional eating - or, for me, working out until I passed out combined with emotional eating). For me, that was the hardest part - once I forgave myself and accepted myself, even in the middle of a binge, then it was much easier to work out and eat healthfully. Because the only sustainable reason to work out and eat healthfully is because you VALUE yourself. (And remembering how much your loved one valued you is a good way to help get you back on track.)

But the strength I found in myself while living through my grief, while rebuilding my life without the support and love and guidance of my father - that makes the strength I need to make myself workout when I don't feel like it look like a walk in the park.

You'll get there, and you'll be stronger and healthier because of all you've come through.

Yes. My brother (only sibling) passed in a car accident in 2004. I initially lost 20 pounds, only to gain over 40+ within 6 months.

I'm so sorry all of you went through this.

I can relate. My mom died last year and I gained 21 pounds within a few months.

The last year with her was pretty grueling, because as the cancer spread, she abused and belittled me.

But now I'm back on track. I've lost 10 pounds so far.

Another 12 to go.

Would love to hear from others, who've gone weight gain after loss.

Oh my goodness, my heart goes out to you. I hope you emerge a strong person from this. Your first step is a good one, reaching out like this and finding out you are not alone and are worthy of being heard and cared for,

Just sending hugs to you all. My sweet dad died 2 1/2 weeks after my first child was born, totally without warning. I have no answers, but Ihope you will all take the best care of yourself that you can.
I know that if someone has loved you they would want you to be good to yourself when they pass on.

Been there and done that. We all deal with grieving differently. One thing is for sure, eating, drinking, or any other physical thing we do to ease our pain never works. Seek God in your time of pain and heartache and He will bring you through in a way you never thought possible. Only He can take something ugly and make it beautiful!

itontae wrote: »

I gained a lot of weight very quickly when my lovely mum died last year. It seems not everyone stops eating when stressed/sad. I coped by drinking a lot of wine and eating a ton of unhealthy stuff.

I am now on a mission to lose it.

I consider it to be "sad fat" so am twice as keen to get rid of it because it represents all the pain and sadness I felt about watching mum die. I feel the fat is almost suffocating me.

Has anyone experienced anything similar?

Thanks

My Golden Retriver died suddenly in 2011. Others might not think that especially traumatic, but it affected me deeply (still does even writing this). I went on a eating binge for months afterwards. I knew exactly what I was doing and, quite frankly I didn't care. In fact, I almost consciously wanted to "hurt" myself in an attempt to try to mute the emotional pain of the loss. Injuries and dramatic work schedule changes helped keep the weight on until just recently. Overall, I slowly got back control of my life and recommitted at the beginning of this year. Happy to say that I am now back to my lowest weight before.

You are not alone, nor have you done anything "wrong". Everyone has to move forward at their own pace. It sounds as though you are ready. I think you will find that your commitment and the physical effects of working out will greatly improve your sense of well-being. Good luck!