WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR JANUARY 2025
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Kylia - Yeah, I've got that too. Possible reasons and solutions:It is genuinely an effort for me to put down any task until it's completed. If I set up a mailing box, I have to get whatever is going to go in it into it, label on, ready to go to the post office, and in my car. If it's middle of the day, I have to get it to the post office, but if it's Sunday or in the evening, that feeling that I'm not done will at least diminish until Monday morning. It was why I was so good at my job, as writing for work always has deadlines, so I don't think it's a bad thing, or a bad part of your character.
It does seem to be part of our nature, and I don't think we can stop feeling that way completely, but in recent years, with all the project work I've been doing, I've learned a way to get that voice to stop yammering at me. A friend who was a shrink told me once that it's a matter of how we look at tasks, jobs, projects, etc. If you think of the project as a whole, then the sense that you're not done will nag you, push you, etc., and make you uncomfortable until it really is finished in toto.
I talked to him about it because I was getting so annoyed at my now-ex-husband because I'd ask for help "washing clothes" and he would put stuff in the washer and not think about what else needed doing. I thought of washing clothes as being getting those clothes from the hamper to folded or hung and put away. My ex thought I meant "washing," and by putting the clothes into wash, thought he was finished. Thereby annoying the snot out of me. If you've looked at a child, or at someone at work and said, "But you're not DONE yet," when they feel like they are, that's probably part of what's happening.
Anyway - I've learned two ways that help. With my projects and purses, etc., I've set up project boxes. In sewing, crocheting, knitting, etc., they call them "UFOs," unfinished objects. Putting an unfinished piece literally in a box helps me label it a UFO and remove it from my conscious consideration of what I need to get done until I get back to it. Then I set days to consider just my UFOs, and tackle one at a time. Things may go back in their separate UFO box four or five times. You may not be able to do that in your work and your home life. But the other thing I do is what my ex did, and break it down into separate tasks. It's allowed me to leave my husband's work jeans in the dryer since yesterday morning--they're dry, but I haven't felt I had to get them out and hung up, because I had the task in my head as getting them from the washer to the dryer, not the whole. Today, my task is to get them hung up in his closet.
Don't know that this is that helpful, but if you think about ways to break your processes into separate tasks, you can get a lot more relaxed about it. Remember, not "steps," as that implies there's further to climb! "Tasks," so that it is something you can FINISH. Then set yourself a different task for the next thing that needs doing. Helps me a lot.
Heather - Bea looks absolutely giddy. Probably just the absence of the older kids, and having your attention solely on her helps a lot. My baby sister felt the same way, I think, as the baby of the family. The older kids really picked on her (not me, I had my head in a book, so she was constantly bugging ME to play with her), but she was constantly being tortured about something, or made to feel less than.
Machka - Like the rest, I'm sure you will deal with the current situation with your husband with complete equanimity. My respect for you only grows. Not helpful, I know... but genuinely, you're amazing.
Just a laugh for today - while I was in town on Thursday, I stopped in the thrift store and found a couple things, and was looking at the sewing machines, more for parts than anything. Stopped to talk to a couple of ladies who were looking at them and discussed with them whether they were worth buying. When I was talking to my husband about it later, I said, "I got caught up in this conversation with two little old ladies about sewing machines..." and realized that anyone looking would have seen THREE little old ladies, not just two. Does make me wonder if I'm ever going to feel that I'm as old as the mirror tells me I am.
Did find this for $4. Lightweight, warm enough without being too warm - perfect for swanning around the house getting things done. And pretty. I wear very, very few prints. It's not helping the "old lady" feeling, but I'm not sure anything would...
Later, my dears...
Love,
Lisa in AR6 -
Morning ladies
Another lb down..im a happy camper..will get my butt in gear in a bit
Have to break down some cardboard and get my garbage together.and do the dishes.
Poor Delia is teething in earnest..she was cranky,just wanted to nurse and nap all day yesterday..poor sweetie3 -
Betsy in NW WA1 -
I wrote a whole philosophical piece, inspired by Margaret and Lisa, but it went poof!
All about the joys of art and the serendipity of our deciding to turn up at the watercolour class on the cruise.
I'm going to load John's newest picture on the next window, because that's why it disappeared. Boo!
Sorry you missed my extensive ramblings!
Heather UK xxxxxxxx2 -
Inspired by the shattering of our Velux.
John never knew he was good at graphic art!
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx
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Bea has been diagnosed with the hyperactive version of ADHD. So we are a family of what DDIL calls "neurospicy".
😜
Edie was doing her cyclo-cross today, up in South London, in a howling wind and cold rain. Haven't heard how she got on yet. She is some determined girl.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx2 -
Lisa, when my grandmother was in a nursing home at age 85+ she referred to the others as old ladies seemingly without understanding that she, too, fit that description. About the laundry, Jake thought that putting the clothes in the washer and setting the timer to start first thing in the morning was "doing the laundry" and when he put the basket of laundry on the table to be folded, he announced that the laundry was done having no idea how much work the folding and putting away entailed for me.Vicki, It's hard for me to imagine that there are people who would be happy doing the work you do and driving a bus. One or the other. There's a job out there for you. It's just the waiting that's so difficult.Machka, Your husband's surgery sounds like a huge challenge for both of you. I know you'll deal with it one day at a time and find ways to take care of yourself as you take care of him.Margaret, What a great description of joy. Learning to enjoy what's around you is a great companion to gratitude and happiness.Kylia, You are right about habits. Even at my lowest moments, I default to my habits and do what I would normally do so something gets accomplished and I can feel better.Heather, Your Burns party looks like so much fun. I think I have all the documents I need to begin preparation of income tax, but with all that's going on, I can't imagine fragmenting myself by tackling it yet. I'll just be sure to keep it all together for the day I can deal with it. Had a long phone conversation with daughter in California. She is dealing with a sick dog who may need weeks of special care to recover completely. She has been a good support for me and me for her. Barbie in NW WAAllie, It's a great feeling to be able to get rid of clothes that are too big. 7 -
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Heather - John's drawing is wonderful! And disturbing, as the graphic nature of it is so good, and gets the sense of broken and shattered across marvelously well.2
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Finished my latch-hook and took an old pillow that was ripping at the seams and used that as the base for the latch-hook. Made a nice little cushion.
Had my hair cut into a ‘shaggy-pixie’ about 6 weeks ago. It needs a trim. I don’t remember if I posted this picture before but the dark haired picture is what I requested, of course the white hair is me! Will get it trimmed back to behaving the first week of February.
Walked 30 minutes 2 days in row with no breathing problems. I am going to continue to get every day then add another short 15 minute walk later in the day. That’s what I was doing before I got so sick. I’m just glad to be able to walk again with using my rescue inhaler or coughing my fool head off! I don’t remember when I’ve ever been that sick! Glad it’s done!
Started crocheting a Jack and Sally (Nightmare Before Christmas) stuffed toy. I like collecting these but hate working with black yarn. It is so hard to see the stitches with black yarn. Jack is done almost all in black. I’ll post pics when I’m done with him.
Thought for today:
Why do some couples go to the gym?
Because they want their relationship to work out! 😍
Love,
RVRita in Roswell 👽
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We could use some prayers from anyone who's inclined. We just got word this morning that my youngest cousin, Jeffrey, is in the end stages of cancer too. His doctors are saying weeks or maybe months. I'm really struggling with this. I think the emotions from my Mom are finally coming out, but I'm really, REALLY sad for him and his family. They just bought a beautiful piece of land "up north" and they haven't even finished the house yet. Their only son is a senior in HS and he may not get to see Jeremiah graduate. I'm just sick... and angry. This shouldn't be happening to this little family. I want to take it on me. I do.
Anyway, that's all. Just sad, frustrated and asking for prayers.
Love and Blessings
Carla, in MN16 -
Lisa, when my grandmother was in a nursing home at age 85+ she referred to the others as old ladies seemingly without understanding that she, too, fit that description. About the laundry, Jake thought that putting the clothes in the washer and setting the timer to start first thing in the morning was "doing the laundry" and when he put the basket of laundry on the table to be folded, he announced that the laundry was done having no idea how much work the folding and putting away entailed for me.Vicki, It's hard for me to imagine that there are people who would be happy doing the work you do and driving a bus. One or the other. There's a job out there for you. It's just the waiting that's so difficult.Machka, Your husband's surgery sounds like a huge challenge for both of you. I know you'll deal with it one day at a time and find ways to take care of yourself as you take care of him.Margaret, What a great description of joy. Learning to enjoy what's around you is a great companion to gratitude and happiness.Kylia, You are right about habits. Even at my lowest moments, I default to my habits and do what I would normally do so something gets accomplished and I can feel better.Heather, Your Burns party looks like so much fun. I think I have all the documents I need to begin preparation of income tax, but with all that's going on, I can't imagine fragmenting myself by tackling it yet. I'll just be sure to keep it all together for the day I can deal with it. Had a long phone conversation with daughter in California. She is dealing with a sick dog who may need weeks of special care to recover completely. She has been a good support for me and me for her. Barbie in NW WAAllie, It's a great feeling to be able to get rid of clothes that are too big.
We have a nice tax lady that has her office in Warrenton Oregon. We met her when husband was in the thick of it healthwise. She knows the latest changes, and makes the process of filing completely painless. We just make copies, and send documents to her. She calls us when she receives them. We get a call when finished, and usually the fee she charges is about what we get back. We receive a nice professional folder and we send her a check and file the folder. Easy peasy. Something to think about having a tax lady.💖
Rebecca
Whidbey
Wa2 -
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My eldest sons bed with the new to him sushi printed pillow cases, and the ramen squishy pillow.😁💖🍱
Quedtion. Do any of your family wear kilts. I have a size 44 Amerikilt. If so just message me and I will sent it to you.💖
Rebecca
Whidbey
Wa
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Beth - best wishes for a speedy recovery from your upcoming surgery. Did your area get another foot of snow?
Margaret - I loved the examples you gave about joy. Looks mighty cold where you are - neat snow sculptures!! Also I've been meaning to mention I have the book "Why we sleep" you mentioned on hole at the library. Thanks for reviewing it!
Rita - I got a kick out of your story about your mom, the strip club and Playgirl. I think I still have the issue with the Burt Reynolds centerfold around here some place.... that latch hook pillow is super cute, great idea using an old pillow as the base. Love that pixie haircut too.
Lisa - that sweater/wrap you found for $4 is awesome. I'm still surprised when I'm out shopping and see an old lady's reflection in a window. - takes me a minute to realize that's me.
Weekly Check-in reminder for tomorrow
Lanette
Sunny (41F) SW WA State6 -
Do any of you have Reynaud's? I've always had cold hands and feet but yesterday I had a shock seeing one finger had turned completely white. First time I've experienced that and Dr Google says its a sign of Reynauds. Appreciate any insights.
You ladies rock. Sending energy and light to all who need it. Stay well. We can do this.
Rori
Colorado Foothills
add me to the list(I know, a bit late- still trying to catch up) with Reynaud's. Hands and feet always cold, for me if I touch things that are cold my fingers turn beet red and itch and hurt so bad. Have to warm them in warm water. I wear fuzzy socks all winter in my shoes. I also can't eat/drink anything cold without having a cup of hot tea with it or I get instant severe pain in my chest. Not just frozen like ice cream but even cold things like yogurt. I always get my drinks when we go out- water NO ice. Can't even enjoy iced tea in the summer anymore. A bit cool is ok but have to sip it if it is too cold. This time of the year, I drink hot tea pretty much from the time I get up until I go to bed.
My asthma is also cold induced(cold weather)- so I just tell people, basically, I am allergic to the cold.
Debbie,
Napa Valley,Ca
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[b
Debbie-once your husband has connected with all the necessary folks he should probably back off daily visits )or at least keep them short) so can adjust. It's a tough transition for both of them, they have been doing that crazy dance for so long.
Ginny in Ohio
You are sooooo right on all points.
He is actually skipping seeing her today. He did have to take care of the dog this morning as I was at church. The dog will only get one walk today but that is better than what he was getting. May see if dh wants to walk with us- doubtful. He may just stay at her house and clean more. Slowly dumping stuff that he couldn't dump before(nothing important-junk mail, expired meds, expired food ) Need to donate some of the dog sweaters- I have found 4 boxes full so far. She made him wear one all the time, even in the house when the heater was on. She was cold so was sure the dog was too. I put one on him when it is cold outside and we are walking a long walk but take it off as soon as we get back in the house.
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Carla - so sorry about your cousin Jeffrey's diagnosis. Life throws some weird brickbats at us, for seemingly no reason. How stressful for his young family.
My DDIL is going to Dubai to promote her new book, and her other ones, on Tuesday. The publishers have also paid for her parents to accompany her! We are helping my son out on Thursday, when he has to be up in London early, by giving the girls breakfast and John taking them to school. We will also put in a shift at the weekend to give him a break.
I have lunch on Thursday with G.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx4 -
Afternoon all
Took a nap ,got my garbage together,Dan came and put it out for me.
Carla- im so sorry to hear about your cousin..It just isn't fair..
Heather- thats exciting for your DIL and you guys are such wonderful grandparents
Watching little girl tomorrow, then taking Doris to pick up her new glasses4 -
Finished my latch-hook and took an old pillow that was ripping at the seams and used that as the base for the latch-hook. Made a nice little cushion.
Had my hair cut into a ‘shaggy-pixie’ about 6 weeks ago. It needs a trim. I don’t remember if I posted this picture before but the dark haired picture is what I requested, of course the white hair is me! Will get it trimmed back to behaving the first week of February.
Walked 30 minutes 2 days in row with no breathing problems. I am going to continue to get every day then add another short 15 minute walk later in the day. That’s what I was doing before I got so sick. I’m just glad to be able to walk again with using my rescue inhaler or coughing my fool head off! I don’t remember when I’ve ever been that sick! Glad it’s done!
Started crocheting a Jack and Sally (Nightmare Before Christmas) stuffed toy. I like collecting these but hate working with black yarn. It is so hard to see the stitches with black yarn. Jack is done almost all in black. I’ll post pics when I’m done with him.
Thought for today:
Why do some couples go to the gym?
Because they want their relationship to work out! 😍
Love,
RVRita in Roswell 👽
Love the pillow!1 -
Stat for the day-
Housecleaning etc- 3hrs 20min 18sec, vacuum, dust, change bedsheets, laundry fold/put away, wipe down back patio furniture, etc= 929c
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Sorry to say I have been having several days of binging after dinner. I do well during the day but in the evening I can’t seem to resist snacking on chips, cookies, etc. I think some of it may be due to taking the anti-depressants again.
I have continued to doing my house walking! I know it makes me feel better to be moving more.
Carol in GA
Evening times are the hardest part for me too. If I stay busy, I am great but when I sit down in the evening with my cup of tea and watch tv, I start getting the munchies and want something. Then it starts. Something salty but then need something sweet because of all the salt, then back to salty some evenings. Drinking flavored herbal tea really helps with the sweet cravings.5 -
Rebecca, Like you, I have a wonderful tax lady in California. Her father played golf with Jake. We've used her for taxes for more than 20 years. Right now all I can do is put stuff in a folder so I don't lose it. I expect in a few weeks I'll be able to tackle it but not this week.
Carla, I, too, am sad for your cousin and his family, Barbie in NW WA 5 -
Whidislander wrote: »Lisa, when my grandmother was in a nursing home at age 85+ she referred to the others as old ladies seemingly without understanding that she, too, fit that description. About the laundry, Jake thought that putting the clothes in the washer and setting the timer to start first thing in the morning was "doing the laundry" and when he put the basket of laundry on the table to be folded, he announced that the laundry was done having no idea how much work the folding and putting away entailed for me.Vicki, It's hard for me to imagine that there are people who would be happy doing the work you do and driving a bus. One or the other. There's a job out there for you. It's just the waiting that's so difficult.Machka, Your husband's surgery sounds like a huge challenge for both of you. I know you'll deal with it one day at a time and find ways to take care of yourself as you take care of him.Margaret, What a great description of joy. Learning to enjoy what's around you is a great companion to gratitude and happiness.Kylia, You are right about habits. Even at my lowest moments, I default to my habits and do what I would normally do so something gets accomplished and I can feel better.Heather, Your Burns party looks like so much fun. I think I have all the documents I need to begin preparation of income tax, but with all that's going on, I can't imagine fragmenting myself by tackling it yet. I'll just be sure to keep it all together for the day I can deal with it. Had a long phone conversation with daughter in California. She is dealing with a sick dog who may need weeks of special care to recover completely. She has been a good support for me and me for her. Barbie in NW WAAllie, It's a great feeling to be able to get rid of clothes that are too big.
We have a nice tax lady that has her office in Warrenton Oregon. We met her when husband was in the thick of it healthwise. She knows the latest changes, and makes the process of filing completely painless. We just make copies, and send documents to her. She calls us when she receives them. We get a call when finished, and usually the fee she charges is about what we get back. We receive a nice professional folder and we send her a check and file the folder. Easy peasy. Something to think about having a tax lady.💖
Rebecca
Whidbey
Wa
In Australia, that is the best way to go. I think most people go that route.
We use H&R Block. They can access everything except donations. So the only thing I bring in are donation receipts.
Both our taxes are finished within half an hour and the money is in the bank 2 weeks later.
M in Oz2 -
Did a 10 Pounds Down DVD then went for a walk then to WalMart
Teri – glad to hear your family is all well
barbie – I swear, archaeologists when they raze this house, will find all kinds of toys
Barbara – the cramping/nausea, etc. seems to have gone away. Guess something didn’t agree with me. But on the bright side, at least for today, every time I am tempted to eat not what I’ve logged, I remember how I felt and how I don’t want to go thru that again. So there is a bright side. I can’t wait for it to get warmer and stays light later so that I can go walking after dinner. Right now I’m working on the jigsaw puzzle
Lanette – When I couldn’t go walking, I believe that’s what started my eating out of boredom. Oh, I do that, but I was doing it more often.
Tracey – I’m so sorry to hear about Rodger’s mom. Sure hope she’s better fast
Lectored at the church last night but first stopped at CVS to get one of Vince’s prescriptions
Great ice sculptures
Lisa – great find. I got a coat that I wear to BK. $4.99 for BK – that works for me. I also got 2 pairs of Lee Jeans each for $4.99. Hey, Lee jeans for $4.99 – good enough for BK. Don’t worry about looking like an “old lady” when you’re in the house. Who’s going to see you? Cory? I’m sure he won’t mind (he probably won’t even see...lol)
Allie – you’re doing so well.
Heather – love John’s picture. Glad to hear Bea got diagnosed. It would be horrible if she had to live her life without it
Carla – HUGS
Rebecca – what adorable pillows! Sorry, no kilt here, but thanks for the offer.
Debbie – do you have handwarmers? I love mine:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0DCN32JWM?ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_fed_asin_title&th=1
Great for when I’m walking, I just keep them in my pocket.
I always get my drinks water no ice too. Vince always knows what I’ll order. I also always keep some tea bags in my pocketbook. It seems that every place has tea, but it’s almost always iced tea. Who wants iced tea in January? What is your favorite tea?
Carol and Deb - Add me to the list of people who do well during the day and then at nighttime snack. Oh, I snack on decent foods, freeze dried fruit (dried fruit usually has sugar added to it. I like the freeze dried fruit), fruit, cheese. But I still can’t help snacking. Trying to keep some tea nearby, hoping that’ll help. Next I think I’ll try having pickle juice. Just to get me started.
Heather – you ARE great grandparents. How I envy you, being so close to them
Well, bowling and then ceramics tomorrow night.
Michele NC
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Heather - it looks like a great Robbie Burns night.
Is this Max’s first year attending?
Love your card. The grands certainly enjoy the one on one time. I prefer to take them one at a time now because I get to know them a bit better and I don’t have to worry about being a referee.
Going to that watercolour class sure changed your lives.
Our family is full of neurospicy as well. I think it helps with the artistic side of life.
That’s exciting for your DIL.
Kylia - some of these sports and activities really take up a lot of children’s time. 25-30 hours a week is a lot! I find so much is so competitive these days and it takes the fun out of it.
Rita - I need to get back to walking too. It makes me feel so much better. I just need my miserable heel to heal.
Carla - prayers and hugs for your family.
Debbie and Carol - Hi, I’m Tracey and I get munchies every evening too.
I try to stay busy in the evenings to help avoid eating but some nights I just want to do nothing.
My BFF went to visit Rodger’s mom in the hospital today. She called us so we could talk to her. She sounded really good. They believe they’ve gotten all of the fluid drained away from the heart. They are waiting for a consult for leg pain she’s had for at least the last 5 years. I hope they are able to find the cause and fix it. I fear that they won’t. She had a bypass surgery in 1995 so she has stents in her groin area. The surgeon that did that surgery saw her a few years ago and told her that the stents weren’t the problem, now the doctor thinks one has broken.
She is 80 and has had two heart attacks. I don’t know if they would or could operate again now.
One day at a time.
Well I ended up taking Michaela home today by myself. We didn’t have our date. We haven’t even sat in the same room this weekend. No fighting or anything he just got thrown for a loop with worrying about his mom and didn’t feel like it.
I bought these sunglasses for Michaela for 1.75 today. She said that they make her look fancy.
Tracey in Edmonton
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Rita: Yay! On the house eearch.
Machka: My sympathies to Rowan and you on you ER ordeal. Hugs and prayers that it’s dealt with speedily.
We had another storm front passing though yesterday, so we didn’t go visit our daughter. We Skyped instead.
Today’s plan is to go to Monday Painters after lunch. I will probably do group accounts this morning and sort out my rents for Thursday’s monthly meeting.
tempis fugit amor manet
🤗 🤗 🤗 and 🙏 🙏 🙏 to those who Have want/need them.
céad míle fáilte to our new ladies.
☘️ Terri1 -
Carla-prayers for you and family. Hope your cousin receives good treatment.
Tracey-Hope MIL continues to improve. I don't think it unusual that the original doctor with the stents would say his work is still fine. If there is something off about what he put in all those years ago I wouldn't think it was necessarily a problem with the original work but just normal wear and tear. Glad you were able to talk to her. Michaela is a true fashionista!
Lisa-the jacket is cute. I see younger ladies at work wearing similar!
Taxes-years ago we paid to have them done. A number of years ago when it was just the two of us and very simple, we (I) began using an online firm. If I had something complicated regarding properties or a business, etc., I would probably use a person (our old one retired). But mine is basically just filling in the blanks so it is a Saturday afternoon job of an hour or less some weekend between now and April 15.
Got outside for a walk yesterday. Most of the sidewalks were cleared off well. Was nice to be in sunshine. Since sunset isn't until 5:48 I will try to get a 30 minute walk in after work.
Off to start my Monday.
Take care all,
Ginny in Ohio
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