flipside of boys acting masculine, girls acting feminine?

godblessourhome
godblessourhome Posts: 3,892 Member
edited October 3 in Chit-Chat
ladies, does it bother you when you hear a woman aspire to be a stay-at-home mom instead of working a career? several of my friends feel offended by it because 'it's not the 50s; women can do more than that now'. how do you feel about schools teaching girls how to cook and sew (a lost art)?
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Replies

  • ilovedeadlifts
    ilovedeadlifts Posts: 2,923 Member
    I kind of wanna be a stay at home dad.
    lol.
    does that qualify?
  • SmangeDiggs
    SmangeDiggs Posts: 238 Member
    It would be awesome if my daughter learnt how to cook and sew at school, she certainly is not going to learn any sewing skills from me so it would be handy for someone in the house to know how to darn a sock.

    I also dont think there is anything wrong with aspiring to be a stay at home mum, part of the womans rights movement was about giving woman the opportunity to choose what they want to do with their future, if that is to be a stay at home mum then so be it.
  • daves160
    daves160 Posts: 600
    I would add that those who choose to stay home and raise their families have chosen to do so. Why would anyone make them feel bad about their personal choice? Many women who work do so out of necessity, not choice. Kind of ironic if you ask me...
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    I don't care that much what other people do as long as it doesn't hurt me.
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
    A parent should do what they can do in the best interest of their children. In our house, my husband stays home with the kids. My job much more easily has withstood the recession than his career choice would have. I think kids should be able to learn home ec in schools, but it should be all kids, not just the girls.
  • I don't see anything wrong with it. When I have kids I wish that I would be able to, at least for a while.
  • radicalreader
    radicalreader Posts: 207 Member
    I think it would be great for schools to teach girls to cook and sew ... but only if they teach the boys, too.
    Those are skills that EVERYBODY needs ... plus laundry, budgeting, credit cards, basic car maintenance, basic carpentry, etc.

    Our high schools should make a basic life skills class mandatory for graduation.
    We are pushing all students to learn calculus (which is great, but rarely real-life useful), whereas they'd be way better off if we taught them to understand credit and credit ratings or how to evaluate buying a car vs. leasing, etc.
  • SmangeDiggs
    SmangeDiggs Posts: 238 Member
    I kind of wanna be a stay at home dad.
    lol.
    does that qualify?

    My partner is going to be a stay at home dad for the next couple of years, he is sooo excited about it.
  • kkauz42
    kkauz42 Posts: 537 Member
    I personally have no desire to stay at home whenever I get married and have kids. I definitely want to work! My best friend on the other hand will definitely stay at home when her and her husband start a family...it's just not my thing!
  • sblair77
    sblair77 Posts: 355 Member
    I have a full time career and make more money than my husband BUT if we get pregnant I have already made it clear that I am going to quit work and raise my child and care for the home. I will probably still do some freelance work but it's what I want to do.

    Could I do both? Possibly.

    Do I want to do both? Absolutely not.

    I am an all in or all out sort of person. I won't feel 100% dedicated to either by family nor my career if I try to do both.
  • As long as it is a CHOICE, I see nothing wrong with it.
  • i have been working for about 10 years now (i'm only 24 lol). i don't mind it. i have too. i had horrible parents ( neglectfull and in and out of jail etc.) i will be staying home with my kids to provide them all the things i ever wanted emotionally from my parents that i never got.
  • court182
    court182 Posts: 307
    I wish my school would have offered those classes! I don't know a thing about sewing and I only know how to cook simple things! I totally want to be a stay-at-home mom too, always have! :)
  • I think it's fine as long as the OPTIONS are equally available to both men and women. Men can choose to work or choose to be stay-at-home dads, and women have that same option. Home ec. teaches life-skills and how to run a household: appropriate and useful information for both boys and girls to know, so both boys and girls should be allowed to attend the class.
  • Fitnin6280
    Fitnin6280 Posts: 618 Member
    I would love to be a stay at home mom! However I have to work to pay the bills. I don't think there is a more respectable job than taking care of your children. Also I do think that schools should teach cooking and sewing, but I think it should be taught to both boys and girls. My husband is a wonderful cook as is my father. Look at how many celebrity cooks there are... Bobby Flay, Emeril, Elton Brown, the list goes on and on. I think it is important for everyone to learn how to cook for themselvs and to not be reliant on someone else to feed them.
  • bbygrl5
    bbygrl5 Posts: 964 Member
    ladies, does it bother you when you hear a woman aspire to be a stay-at-home mom instead of working a career? several of my friends feel offended by it because 'it's not the 50s; women can do more than that now'. how do you feel about schools teaching girls how to cook and sew (a lost art)?

    The beauty of modern day is that I think women can choose to do what they wish to do and it seems to me that many different lifestyles are being accepted now. A woman can choose to stay home with kids or work and it seems to be okay (by the general masses).

    I think what's important is that a woman never gets so comfortable as to ever completely depend on a man monetarily. Nothing is guaranteed in life, I say that having been married to my husband for 10 years. A woman should never be in a position to feel like if her husband/man left or if she wanted out, that it would ruin her life's stability.
  • I believe women should stay at home if at all possible (nowadays that can be challenging)..I've done both and find it much more rewarding to stay at home to ensure that my child/ren and husband are taken care of. When I worked part-time some of my duties were neglected and I was not able to attend evening PTO functions or school programs. However, it can be balanced. As it relates to home economis (home ec)...shoot yeah... schools should implement those classes again - they are lessons you will carry on for life. As for the males - technical/vocational skills are vital (machinery, shop, carpentry, etc.) - those skills come in handy as well. Also, I find that simple business skills are needed... I've seen many people improperly dressed for interviews - business attire is still acceptable form of dress for interviews - not sandals, short skirts, blue jeans, t-shirt...etc. #myexperience :smile:
  • MayMaydoesntrun
    MayMaydoesntrun Posts: 805 Member
    I don't care that much what other people do as long as it doesn't hurt me.

    this is me.
  • kb455
    kb455 Posts: 679 Member
    I'm not sure being a stay at home mom is always something someone aspires to be but that's to say its not rewarding or admirable. But, for those that do, I think its great. I graduated college, had a career but CHOSE to stay home with my kids. I can and will go back to working when the time is right. If anything, I think girls nowadays are pushed toward college, not being a homemaker or stay at home parent, at least that's how it was in my school. Plus, I don't think there is anything wrong with someone WANTING to be a stay at home parent.
  • Ashley121205
    Ashley121205 Posts: 131 Member
    I think it would be great ! I'm a stay at home mom to 4 out of necessity ! It would not be worth it to pay for daycare and work because I'd basically be working to pay for daycare. lol. I would love if they brought back home economics in school now. Since, I have had to rely on being self taught or go to my Gram to find out how to do certain things like knitting, crocheting etc. But it's everyone's personal choice whether they work or stay home and no one should make them feel wrong for doing it. There's quite a few more stay at home dads now that the economy is bad.
  • jamiesgotagun
    jamiesgotagun Posts: 670 Member
    I don't care that much what other people do as long as it doesn't hurt me.

    ^^^^my thoughts exactly!!
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    Cooking and sewing should not be taught to girls. It should be taught to everyone.

    Same as how to change the oil in your car or fix a flat tire, how to unclog a blocked drain, and other so-called "boy" things.

    My father was a mechanic at a dress factory. He knew how to repair sewing machines AND use them, and I'm not quite as handy as he was, but I'm a Jenny of All Trades. Drywall, plumbing, electrical, as well as sewing, cooking, and dancing in high heels.

    I can't fold a fitted sheet, though. :embarassed: I've come to accept my shortcomings. :laugh:
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
    Feminism is about women having all the same choices and options as a man. And yes, one of those options is staying home with children. I would cringe a little about a girl planning on doing this because what happens if she never gets married? She needs a back up obviously.
  • nessajk
    nessajk Posts: 32
    No, it doesn't bother me at all, but I don't feel like in today's world that schools should prioritize teaching cooking and sewing, however. For a daughter of my own, I would be fine with her wanting to do that but I would still expect her to have the technical skills to be able to have a career and take care of herself. Most women don't get married until 30yo these days. What will she do in the meantime? And if there is a divorce, she would need to be able to support herself. I've learned to cook and sew on my own, I wouldn't want my kids to be learning that in school if it was in place of other classes.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    ladies, does it bother you when you hear a woman aspire to be a stay-at-home mom instead of working a career? several of my friends feel offended by it because 'it's not the 50s; women can do more than that now'. how do you feel about schools teaching girls how to cook and sew (a lost art)?

    I think it's a wonderful thing if a woman wishes to be home with her kids. It's not the right choice for every woman, and that is completely fine.

    I work in academia, and there is a lot of stigma about women who quit to stay home with their kids more, but as a child of a single hardworking mother, I can say it would've been so nice to have her home more and more engaged in my life growing up.

    My grandmothers taught me how to sew and cook, and even as a woman who is on her way to Ph.D. and a career, I consider them essential life skills not just skills for a homemaker. Everyone should know how to prepare a healthy meal for themselves and repair small holes in their garmets.
  • Pocket_Pixi
    Pocket_Pixi Posts: 1,167 Member
    I think schools should teach both boys and girls how to cook and sew, I do not know how many times I have had to sew a button on something for one of my brothers because he has NO clue what the heck he is doing.

    My youngest brother just dropped a life transition course because he was too bored with it and in all honesty he is the one that did my budget for me, but they teach the students how to grocery shop, meal plan, budget, sew, cook etc. I really wish they had something like this when I was in school.

    As for when people choose to stay home with their kids and be homemakers. I see nothing wrong with it, I don't know if I can say I would do it or not but if it is what is going to make someone happy, and if they can afford to do it I say go for it.
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
    Do schools no longer offer Home Ec? I took it in junior high. My mother had taught me to "sew" but that class taught me how to read patterns, how to thread and handle the machine, etc. There were boys in the class as well, but it was an elective so only a few boys took it.
  • cdstadt
    cdstadt Posts: 311 Member
    As long as it is a CHOICE, I see nothing wrong with it.

    Yeah. Expecting a woman to have a successful career is just as stereotypical as expecting a woman to be a stay at home mom. We need to drop all the expectations.
  • kb455
    kb455 Posts: 679 Member

    I work in academia, and there is a lot of stigma about women who quit to stay home with their kids more

    I agree. When I left my job to be a stay at home mom, I got a lot of varied reactions. More often than not, the most negative, judgmental reactions were from my FEMALE coworkers.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member

    I work in academia, and there is a lot of stigma about women who quit to stay home with their kids more

    I agree. When I left my job to be a stay at home mom, I got a lot of varied reactions. More often than not, the most negative, judgmental reactions were from my FEMALE coworkers.

    My best friend just finished a Ph.D. in Chemistry from one of the best schools in the world with an incredible resume of publications, and when she decided to stay home with her family, her adviser, many of her colleagues, and others really made her fer awful for it. They said she had "wasted" herself. It was very sad to see her so upset over it. She's a wonderful incredible woman.
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